JGstes  %Lauriat 


3 


UNIFORM  VOLUMES  BY  THE  SAME  AUTHOR. 


Published  at  $1.50  each. 


SUMMER  REST. 

SKIRMISHES  AND  SKETCHES. 

A   NEW  ATMOSPHERE. 

S  TUMBLING-BLOCKS. 

GALA-DA  YS. 

COUNTRY  LIVING  AND  COUNTRY  THINKING. 

WOOL   GATHERING. 

WOMAN'S    WRONGS. 

SERMONS   TO   THE  CLERGY. 

FIRST  LOVE  IS  BEST. 


FIRST  LOVE  IS  BEST, 


FV 


4  Sentimental  §ketcn* 


BY   GAIL    HAMILTON. 


vJ 


U 


'What  is  it  all?  an  ancient  rhyme, 
Ten  thousand  times  besung  ; 

That  part  of  Paradise  which  man 
Without  the  portal  knows  — 

Which  hath  iwen  since  the  world  began, 
And  shall  be  till  its  close." 


BOSTON : 
ESTES    AND    LAURIAT. 

1877. 


COPYRIGHT, 

ESTES   AND   LAURIAT. 

1877. 


Stereotyped  at  the  Boston  Stereotype  Foundry, 
No.  19  Spring  Lane. 


PEEF  ACE. 


I  DESIRE  to  present  to  the  novelists  —  of  whom  I  am  a 
constant  reader  and  ardent  admirer  —  the  most  abject 
apology  for  poaching  on  their  manor. 

But  it  is  their  own  fault !  The  hard-heartedness  dis 
played  of  late  years  by  novelists  towards  their  own  crea 
tions  is  such  as  to  demand  the  establishment  of  a  Society 
for  the  Prevention  of  Cruelty  to  Heroes  and  Heroines. 
There  is  nothing  left  for  a  reader  of  sensibility  but  to 
follow  the  track  of  these  luckless  yet  often  excellent  young 
men  and  women,  and  lay  out  for  them  a  happier  fate  than 
the  unnatural  authors  of  their  being  have  provided.  I  give 
the  novelists  fair  warning  that  without  assuming  ability  to 
write  even  their  poorest  novel,  I  assert  my  right  to  rebel 
against  their  best  and  rescue  their  helpless  victims.  Nor 
let  any  writer  fancy  himself  to  have  secured  immunity  from 
me  by  throwing  a  final  gleam  of  joy  over  previous  reams 
of  wretchedness.  Years  of  misunderstanding,  misrepre 
sentation,  and  misery  are  hardly  atoned  for  by  the  brief 
formula :  "  She  leaned  her  lovely  head  upon  his  lordly 
shoulder  and  sweetly  sighed,  '  My  Frederic  ! ' 
The  End." 

5 


6  PREFACE. 

I  confess  that  many  otherwise  idle  moments  have  been 
spent  in  these  works  of  necessity  and  mercy.  But  the 
present  is  the  first  one  I  have  ever  so  much  as  thought  of 
committing  to  paper  ;  and  the  only  excuse  I  have  to  offer 
is  the  unusually  aggravated,  not  to  say  impious,  woes 
heaped  upon  the  heads  of  some  very  worthy  persons  at  a 
time  when  I  happened  to  be  spending  winter  weeks  in  a 
climate  so  wooing  and  winning  that  the  devout  church-goer 
had  to  dig  through  five  feet  of  snow  at  his  own  garden- 
gate  on  his  way  to  the  sanctuary,  and  then  have  the  snow- 
shovel  pitched  over  at  him  when  he  got  back,  that  he  might 
dig  his  way  in  through  another  snowbank  on  the  same 
spot,  as  exactly  like  the  first  as  two  peas  in  a  pod  !  If  any 
one  thinks  that,  under  similar  circumstances,  he  can  get 
more  enjoyment  out  of  less  mischief,  I  should  like  to  see 
him  try  it. 

In  further  apology  —  though  no  apology  can  lower  me 
so  deep  into  the  Valley  of  Humiliation  as  I  wish  to  burrow 
—  I  will  only  add  that  my  wildest  aspirations  originally 
touched  no  more  than  a  single  chapter  in  some  gasping 
Magazine  ;  but 

"  Who  can  contend  with  his  lords  ? " 

and  ladies  ?     I  thought  I  was  but  letting  a  few  fancies  stray 
into  a  snowbank  ;  and  —  there  came  out  this  calf! 

As  there  is  now,  on  this  I3th  April,  only  a  foot  of  snow 
under  the  north  wall,  I  have  no  further  use  for  him.  I 
therefore  deck  him  with  ribbons  and  lead  him  forth  to 
sacrifice  —  a  free-will  offering  to  all  who  are  tolerant  of 

veal. 

G.   H. 


FIRST  LOVE  IS  BEST. 


I. 


JTATIIERINE  HAVILAND  emerged  from 
JLV  her  school-days  as  strong  as  a  young  moose. 
If  she  had  lived  a  little  later  she  would  have 
had  more  regard  for  the  exigencies  of  science ; 
but,  as  it  was,  she  never  in  her  ignorance  sus 
pected  that  anything  ailed  her,  and  was  there 
fore  practically  as  well  off  as  if  nothing  had 
ailed  her.  This  was  not  at  all  because  she  did 
not  violate  every  rule  of  mental  and  physical 
health  which  the  wisest  experience  has  estab 
lished.  She  took  six  "  studies  "  and  held  them 
all  well  in  hand,  and  read  Butler's  "  Hudibras  " 
hidden  under  her  "  Corinne,"  while  the  rest  of 
the  class  were  stumbling  through  their  transla 
tion,  —  always  keeping  sufficiently  on  the  watch 
to  be  ready  when  her  own  turn  should  come. 
She  learned  no  art  and  no  science  thoroughly 
except  the  art  of  concentrated  attention,  and 

7 


8  FIRST  LOVE  IS  £EST. 

that  she  mastered  by  learning  each  lesson  per 
fectly,  and  that  she  did  not  from  principle  but 
from  instinct. 

Because  she  was  an  ignoramus,  she  got  up  at 
three  o'clock  in  the  morning  to  study ;  but  be 
cause,  with  all  her  ignorance,  she  had  common 
sense,  she  soon  saw  that  nothing  was  to  be 
gained  by  this,  and  gave  it  up  of  her  own  ac 
cord,  instead  of  having  it  put  into  her  obituary 
like  a  simpleton,  or  prohibited  her  by  written 
law.  She  ate  cake  and  candy  and  mince-pie,  — 
not  inordinately,  but  whenever  it  came  in  her 
way,  —  and,  if  she  thought  of  it  in  season  on 
Saturday  night,  always  laid  in  sufficient  store  of 
nuts  and  figs  to  carry  her  over  Sunday;  and 
whenever  a  box  was  expected  from  home,  was 
careful  to  enjoin  the  senders  by  mail  to  BE  SURE 
and  put  in  a  jar  of  PICKLES.  For  a  day  or  two 
afterwards,  half  a  dozen  girls  might  be  seen 
through  silent  study  hours  hunting  up  Latin 
definitions  in  a  big  dictionary  with  one  hand, 
and  brandishing  a  cracker  and  pickle  in  the 
other.  She  took  no  regular  exercise  whatever, 
except  possibly  jumping  down  stairs  five  at  a 
time  when  no  teacher  was  by,  and  running  off 
blushing  and  shamefaced  if  she  were  caught  in 
the  act.  Gymnastics  there  were  none  in  the 
school,  and  calisthenics  she  could  not  abide,  and 
begged  off  on  the  most  barefaced  pretext ;  but 
sometimes,  when  the  mood  took  her,  she  would 


A   SENTIMENTAL  SKETCH.  9 

wander  away  with  two  or  three  friends  over  the 
hills,  and  across  the  rocks,  and  into  the  swamps, 
on  the  wildest  ten-mile  tramp,  without  path  or 
guide,  declaiming  Byron,  and  conjecturing  all 
sorts  of  astronomical  fancies  and  mid-earth 
myths,  and  come  home  late  to  supper,  and 
assure  her  alarmed  teachers  that  she  had  not  the 
least  idea  it  was  so  late,  nor  how  far  or  where 
she  had  been,  but  she  had  had  a  glorious  time  ! 
and  then  would  she  fall  to  on  her  bread  and 
butter,  or  brown  brewis,  with  the  appetite  of  a 
Wantley  dragon.  She  did  not  hate  her  teachers 
or  play  tricks  upon  them,  but  for  the  most  part 
loved  them  devotedly,  admired  them  with  en 
thusiasm,  and  had  no  higher  ambition  than  to 
become  a  teacher  herself.  Flirtation  never  en 
tered  her  heart  or  mind ;  the  butcher's  boy,  and 
the  green-grocer's  son,  and  the  slim,  trim  little 
dry-goods  clerk,  and  similar  available  beaux,  she 
no  more  thought  of  as  belonging  to  her  world, 
or  as  human  beings,  than  she  did  of  the  ram 
pant,  painted  Indian  that  stood  forever  prof 
fering  his  huge  bunch  of  wooden  cigars  at  the 
druggist's  door.  She  had  indeed  her  dreams  of 
a  future,  in  which  love  and  knighthood  loomed 
heroic  and  alluring,  but  these  dreams  were  vague 
and  far  off.  For  the  present,  she  had  a  grand 
passion  for  Macaulay.  She  took  sides  strongly 
against  successful  and  selfish  JEneas,  and  gave 
all  her  sympathy  to  war-worn  and  love-lorn, 


10  FIRST  LOVE  IS  BEST. 

brave,  beaten  Turnus.  She  was  alive  and  alert 
in  all  great  causes,  in  all  warring  nations,  though 
they  had  been  dead  for  centuries.  She  browsed 
in  the  library  among  all  the  old  English  Reviews 
and  all  the  cloudy  German  poetry.  She  read 
"  Jane  Eyre,"  and  was  led  captive,  and  saw  no 
badness  in  it ;  and  lay  on  the  bed  and  talked  it 
over  with  her  most  intimate  friend,  who  had 
read  it  with  her,  chapter  after  chapter ;  and 
entered  into  a  mutual  vow  that  she  never  would 
read  it  with  any  other  person  except  the  man 
she  should  be  engaged  to  marry,  —  believing 
that  to  be  the  deepest  mark  of  confidence  it 
would  be  possible  to  show  that  remote  and  con 
tingent,  but  unparalleled  hero. 

So,  then,  as  I  have  intimated,  my  Katherine 
left  school,  knowing  nothing  of  any  consequence, 
endowed  only  with  the  much-deprecated  smat 
tering  of  many  sciences  and  many  tongues,  but 
with  a  power  of  close  and  continued  application, 
with  an  ability  and  a  will  to  accomplish  results, 
with  a  knowledge  of  the  difference  between 
mastery  and  feeble  attempt,  with  an  enthusiasm 
for  letters  and  science,  with  an  eager  love  of  life 
and  activity,  fearless,  careless,  honest,  high 
hearted,  —  and  of  exuberant  health  ! 

Have  I  lingered  too  long?  That  is  because  I 
love  her  so.  And  I  love  the  class  to  which  she 
belongs ;  and  I  do  not  gladly  see  them  spoiled, 
by  over-much  interfering,  into  self-inspection 


A  SENTIMENTAL  SKETCH.  H 

and  self-absorption.  Katherine  came  out  of  her 
school-room  brave  and  buoyant,  not  because  she 
had  done  the  wisest  thing,  still  less  because  she 
had  done  many  unwise  ones ;  but  because  she 
was  of  sturdy  stock  that  never  meddled  with  its 
functions  and  never  knew  it  had  any ;  that  sel 
dom  talked  or  thought  of  duty  or  principle,  but 
simply  did  the  thing  that  ought  to  be  done, 
through  an  upright  instinct  developed  by  gen 
erations  of  honorable  ancestry ;  because  she  had 
lived  a  free,  natural  life,  in  which  inclination 
alone  compelled  exercise,  and  health  and  happi 
ness  wrought  unconsciousness,  and  left  ample  room 
and  verge  enough  for  all  the  mistakes  a  well- 
brought-up  girl  of  good  family  is  likely  to  make. 

And  if  the  new  gospel  of  girlhood  is  to  pre 
vail  ;  if  the  reticence,  the  delicacy,  and  the  dig 
nity  of  nature  are  to  be  coldly  and  coarsely 
violated  in  the  name  of  science ;  if  girls  are  to 
be  held  up  before  the  public  gaze  to  be  dis 
cussed,  and  dissected,  and  vivisected,  analyzed 
and  anatomized,  cosseted  and  coddled  to  keep 
breath  in  their  lungs  and  blood  in  their  veins, 
the  puny  wretches  might  as  well  die  out  alto 
gether  and  make  an  end  of  it. 

At  least,  this  is  what  Katherine  says,  glancing 
around  with  careless  pride  upon  her  own  romp 
ing  girl  and  lusty  boys,  and  aglow  with  the  un- 
marred,  mantling  modesty  of  her  own  pure 
maidenhood  and  matronhood. 


12  FIRST  LOVE  IS  EEST. 

But  this  is  later. 

Thus  it  befell  Katheriue  in  the  days  of  her 
novitiate.  She  was  filled  with  great  thoughts, 
and  meant  to  do  great  things.  Chiefly  her  aspi 
ration  took  the  rather  unromantic,  the  decidedly 
prosaic  form  of  establishing  a  school.  It  should 
be  a  school  founded  on  a  unique  system ;  a 
school  in  which  mere  continuance  should  be  a 
certificate  equal  to  the  diploma  in  other  schools. 
Fresh  from  the  impatience  of  her  own  enforced 
delaying,  she  decreed  that  in  her  school,  stupid 
girls,  dull  girls,  girls  who  were  slow  and  stum 
bling  in  recitation,  who  made  ridiculous,  literal 
translations,  and  blundered  and  cried  over  prob 
lems,  and  professed  a  profound  indifference  as  to 
whether  or  not  the  stars  were  inhabited,  —  these 
girls  should  be  turned  out  of  school  instantly, 
though  they  were  saints,  and  models  of  de 
meanor.  There  should  be  no  rules  and  no  pun 
ishments,  but  the  bright,  alert,  conquering  girls 
should  stay,  and  the  dull  girls  should  go,  on  the 
first  symptom  of  dulness,  and  then  we  should 
see  what  girls  could  do ! 

"  But,  Katy,"  would  meekly  murmur  Mr.  Hav- 
iland,  venturing  a  mild  remonstrance  to  this 
brilliant  young  priestess  of  the  future,  "is  not 
this  rather  branding  a  weakness  as  a  disgrace  ? 
Is  it  not  punishing  a  trait  ?  " 

"  It  is  only  following  the  '  Vestiges  of  Crea 
tion,'  "  would  Kate  reply,  airily.  "  I  do  not 


A  SENTIMENTAL  SKETCH.  13 

make  them  stupid.  I  only  recognize  stupidity, 
and  accommodate  myself  to  it." 

"  By  turning  it  out,  neck  and  heels." 

"Just  as  you  would  do,  father,  if  your  life 
had  been  worn  out  of  you,  hearing  girls  try  to 
remember  a  theorem  instead  of  getting  hold 
of  it." 

k<  Are  not  they  the  very  ones  who  need  teach 
ing  ?  Those  who  can  get  hold  of  it  may  be  let 
alone." 

"  O,  there  are  plenty  of  schools  for  them  al 
ready  ;  and  there  is  not  one  where  a  girl  can  go 
ahead  as  fast  as  she  wishes  to ;  and  there  won't 
be  till  I  set  it  up." 

"  And  when  will  that  be  ?  " 

"  O,  when  my  trunks  are  unpacked,  and  the 
garret  is  sorted,  and  I  have  made  a  visit  or  two, 
and  have  had  a  mound  built  in  the  garden,  and 
been  to  Niagara  and  the  Mammoth  Cave.  One 
wants  some  experience  before  starting  a  school." 

"  I  hope  you  mean  to  start  it  in  the  neighbor 
hood,  Katy." 

"  Not  at  all.  I  should  never  be  anything  here 
but  Kitty  Haviland.  Every  one  would  prophesy 
failure,  and  I  should  not  be  able  to  impose  upon 
people  enough  to  make  them  think  me  dignified. 
I  must  go  far  away,  where  I  have  never  been 
heard  of.  Then  I  shall  be  stately.  I  shall  be 
Miss  Haviland.  I  wish  it  could  be  Madame 
Haviland.  I  am  sure  that  would  strike  awe  into 


14  FIRST  LOVE  IS  BEST. 

the  beholder.  But  I  suppose  Madame  would 
not  do ;  "  with  a  little  sigh. 

"  I  think  Madame  would  do  beautifully,"  says 
a  chance,  and,  it  is  needless  to  add,  a  male  inter 
locutor  ;  "  but  I  question  if  the  Haviland  would 
be  equally  acceptable." 

"  If  I  were  Katherine  Haviland,  I  should  lay 
out  something  else  than  a  school  for  my  course 
in  life,"  Martha  Midkins  would  say,  in  response 
to  Katherine's  enthusiastic  educational  plots. 
Martha  was  the  daughter  of  Mr.  Haviland's  good 
old  housekeeper,  and  a  few  years  older  than 
Katherine.  She  had  been  an  industrious  and 
faithful  pupil  of  the  district  school,  and  had 
made  the  most  of  her  opportunities.  She  was 
an  affectionate  creature,  with  a  taste  for  poetry 
and  melancholy,  foredoomed  to  martyrdom.  She 
had  mind  and  education  enough  to  be  unhappy 
in  her  lowly  circumstances,  but  not  enough  to 
lift  her  out  of  them.  She  was  sufficiently  accom 
plished  to  talk  with  considerable  correctness  and 
a  certain  precision,  but  the  courage  of  her  gram 
mar  she  never  attained. 

"  Why  should  not  I  school  it,  I  should  like  to 
know?"  cried  Katherine,  mounting  her  high 
horse  instantly  on  suspicion  that  her  ability  was 
called  in  question. 

"  Because  the  dreams  of  ambition  can  never 
give  such  lasting  happiness  as  the  sweets  of 
domestic  life." 


A   SENTIMENTAL  SKETCH.  15 

"  Well,"  said  Kate,  rather  descending  from  her 
altitude,  and  quite  unaware  that  she  had  been 
cherishing  dreams  of  ambition,  "  I  don't  intend 
to  murder  all  my  relations  before  getting  out 
my  prospectus." 

"  I  am  hardly  adequate  to  criticise  your  syn 
tax,  but  is  it  not  a  provincialism  to  preface  a 
remark  with  '  well '  ?  " 

"  Very  likely.  But  I  am  a  provincial  myself, 
so  it  is  all  in  character." 

"  But  ought  not  one  to  assist  in  erasing  little 
superfluities  of  that  sort  rather  than  aggravate 
them?" 

"  I  don't  consider  '  well '  a  superfluity.  It  is 
an  expression  of  acquiescence  in  the  existing 
order  of  things  —  means  that  you  don't  fly  out 
against  fate.  All  is  well.  You  had  better  say  it 
yourself,  Martha,  and  stand  by  it,  and  not  flout 
at  my  school." 

"  I  should  not  flout  at  it  if  it  were  necessary 
to  enable  you  to  obtain  a  livelihood.  But  with 
a  parent  ever  ready  to  respond  to  your  slightest 
wish,  you  will  need  only  to  accept  happiness,  and 
where  will  you  find  it  so  rich  and  inexhaustible 
as  in  the  '  sweet,  safe  corner  of  the  household  fire, 
behind  the  heads  of  children  '  ?  " 

"  Yes,  a  hundred  and  fifty  of  them.  We  had 
a  hundred  and  twenty-five  at  school,  but  I  expect 
there  will  be  a  rush  when  I  show  the  true 
capabilities  of  girls,  Miss  Midkins ! " 


16  FIRST  LOVE  IS  BEST. 

"  The  true  capability  of  a  girl  is  to  give  her 
hand  with  her  heart  in  it  to  a  noble,  true  man, 
who  will  sympathize  with  her  in  joy  and  sorrow, 
and  protect  her  in  all  the  storms  of  life." 

"  Horribly  tame,  Martha.  Storms  are  fun  if  you 
don't  have  on  your  best  clothes.  I  like  them." 

"  And  no  doubt  your  strong  woman's  heart 
would  be  a  staff  of  strength  to  the  object  of  your 
devoted  love.  That  is  your  present  and  highest 
mission,  I  am  sure." 

"  Don't  you  believe  it,  Martha  Midkins.  My 
woman's  heart  is  not  going  to  hobble  along  after 
a  man  who  can't  go  alone." 

"  Ah,  Kate,  you  laugh  ;  but  you  will  yet  find 
yourself  under  the  strong  necessity  of  loving. 
And  then  your  school  will  be  but  a  bruised  reed 
to  lean  on." 

"  But  dont  I  love  fifty  people  already?  I  am 
tired  to  death  of  loving  now,  and  long  for  some 
body  to  hate.  You  could  not  recommend  any 
body,  could  you,  that  wants  to  be  soundly 
drubbed?" 

"  Ah,  Kate,  youth  and  beauty  are  defiant ;  but 
the  time  will  come  when  you  will  want  a  loving 
breast  to  lean  on,  and  a  strong  arm  to  encircle 
you,  and  then  you  will  learn  that  general  love 
can  never  satisfy  a  void  and  aching  heart." 

But  Martha  went  away  from  Katherine  to 
sprinkle  and  fold  the  clothes,  which  she  did  care 
fully  and  cheerfully.  It  was  the  gay  and  happy 


A   SENTIMENTAL  SKETCH.  17 

Kate  who  sat  down  in  the  sunshine  and  emitted 
the  following  dismal 

WAIL. 

"  Moaning,  sobbing,  howling,  shrieking, 

Sweeps  the  night-wind  by ; 
Fearful  wailings,  fierce  contendings 

In  the  wrathful  sky. 
But  within,  the  fire-light  reckless 

Of  the  wreathing  snow, 
Flickereth,  danceth,  leapeth,  setteth 

All  the  room  aglow. 

"  Yet  in  vain  the  airy  prancing 

Of  the  rosy  light; 
Vain  to  keep  the  brooding  shadows 

Off  my  heart  to-night ; 
Heeding  nevermore  the  beauty 

Which  it  loveth  best, 
But  the  writhings  of  the  storm-god 

In  his  wild  unrest. 

"  So  my  soul  takes  up  the  dirge, 

And  my  eyes  arc  dimmed, 
Thinking  of  the  hopes  that  flourished 

When  life's  cup  was  brimmed ; 
Thinking  of  the  dew-wet  garlands 

That  entwined  my  brow ; 
Thinking  of  the  desolation 

That  enshrouds  it  now. 

"  O,  the  bliss,  the  thrill,  the  madness, 

Of  my  early  dreaming ! 
O,  the  brilliance  of  that  sunshine, 

O'er  my  pathway  streaming ! 
O,  the  weary,  hopeless  aching, 

O,  the  dull,  hard  sorrow, 
Shrouding  the  relentless  present, 

Shadowing  the  morrow ! 

"  In  yon  village  churchyard  resteth 
Many  a  weary  sleeper, 

2 


18  FIRST  LOVE  IS  BEST. 

BuJ  my  heart  outnumbereth  all, 

And  its  graves  are  deeper. 
They  shall  yet  with  life  immortal 

Up  to  glory  soar,  — 
Glide  my  buried  through  death's  portal, 

Never,  never  more. 

"  And  on,  still  on  the  great  world  goeth, 

Sparing  not  my  pain ; 
Trampling  on  my  quivering  heart-strings 

With  a  calm  disdain.: 
Mocking  all  my  fairy  fancies, 

Scorning  my  appealing ; 
Heartless  to  my  agony, 

For  its  stern  revealing. 

"  And  is  this  life  ?    O  God  in  heaven, 

Hear  my  earnest  prayer, 
In  the  darkness  lost,  bewildered, 
Groping  cveiy — " 

How  long  tliis  liowl  would  have  lasted,  we  can 
only  conjecture,  for  at  this  moment  Kate  was 
startled  by  the  alarm-cry  of  her  favorite  hen, 
mother  and  foster-mother  to  a  brood  of  fifteen 
tiny  chicks ;  and  Katherine,  with  a  premonition 
of  hawks,  rushed  down  into  the  yard,  brandish 
ing  her  arms,  and  uttering  high-pitched  trills,  to 
scare  away  that  bird  of  prey ;  and  her  poem 
was  consigned  to  the  limbo  of  Lost  Arts,  where 
it  remains  to  this  day.  But  even  from  its 
fragmentary,  though  long  drawn-out  bitterness, 
we  can  see  to  what  straits  the  happy  heart  is 
reduced  in  order  to  exercise  its  power  of  suffer 
ing,  and  what  very  bad  verses  a  girl  may  write 
without  being  a  very  bad  girl. 


II. 

AS  time  went  on,  Katherine's  school  retreated 
farther  and  farther  into  the  future,  and  the 
farther  it  went  the  less  persistently  and  win- 
somely  it  beckoned  to  her.  Her  life  was  so  full, 
calls  upon  her  time,  her  ingenuity,  her  sympathy, 
were  so  many,  that  she  seemed  to  have  neither 
space  nor  leisure  for  a  plan.  Even  her  Latin 
and  German  studies  slipped  away  from  her,  and 
the  stars  and  the  under-world  were  left  very 
much  to  themselves,  while  she  became  absorbed 
in  the  concerns  of  this  world. 

So  much  absorbed  that  a  footstep  on  the 
threshold  quite  startled  her.  She  looked  up, 
however,  to  behold  only  the  very  honest  face 
of  a  neighbor,  Mr.  Glynn.  To  be  sure,  Kitty 
would  quite  as  soon  have  been  left  alone  to  her 
own  busy,  happy  thoughts ;  but  Mr.  Glynn's 
look  was  so  hearty  and  cheery  that  she  flung 
open  the  wire  doors  and  welcomed  him  in,  at 
first  with  politeness,  and  then  with  real  hospi 
tality. 

19 


20  FIRST  LOVE  IS  BEST. 

t 

"Have  you  just  come  from  the  city,  Mr. 
Glynn?" 

"  Yes;  I  have  not  even  been  home." 

"  Did  not  my  father  come  down  in  the  train 
with  you  ?  " 

"  No  ;  I  saw  him  half  an  hour  before  I  left, 
and  he  begged  me  to  call  and  say  to  you  that  he 
should  not  be  able  to  come  until  the  late  train, 
and  then  he  would  like  you  to  send  Donald  to 
the  station  for  him." 

"  You  may  say  to  the  gentleman  that  you 
delivered  his  message  faithfully,  but  that  I  de 
clined  to  comply,  and  insisted  on  going  myself." 

"  But  I  shall  add  that,  foreseeing  this  insur 
rection,  I  forestalled  it  on  the  way  up  by  deter 
mining  to  take  Miss  Katherine  for  a  drive,  and 
bringing  her  father  from  the  station  at  the  end 
of  it." 

"  O,"  replied  Katherine,  joyfully,  "  that  would 
be  delightful.  Go  immediately  home.  Go  at  once, 
and  get  your  supper,  that  we  may  lose  no  time." 

"Does  it  not  occur  to  you,  Miss  Haviland, 
that  it  would  be  more  hospitable  in  you,  and 
more  comfortable  for  me,  to  invite  me  cordially 
to  stop  and  take  tea  with  you  ?  " 

"  There  is  no  tea  to  take,  Mr.  Glynn.  There 
is  only  coffee  and  cold  meat,  which  my  father 
likes  after  a  day  in  town.  And  as  for  the  bis 
cuit,  they  are  a  sight  to  behold  ;  I  made  them 
myself." 


A  SENTIMENTAL  SKETCH.  21 

"  The  biscuit,  I  doubt  not,  are  a  great  success." 

"  No ;  but  they  are  a  yery  brilliant  failure. 
Because  there  is  absolutely  no  doubt  about  them. 
You  do  not  labor  under  the  disadvantage  of 
eating  them  with  misgiving.  You  cannot  eat 
them  at  all.  Even  Towser  howled  at  beholding 
them." 

"  But  you  have  a  cracker  or  two  in  the  house?" 

"  I  cannot  deny  that." 

"  And  you  will  make  me  one  little  cup  of  tea  ?  " 

"Why,  yes,  I  suppose  if  I  must  I  must.  But 
I  wanted  you  to  go  home  and  get  the  ponies. 
It  does  not  suit  me  to  drive  with  one  horse." 

"  I  have  often  seen  you  driving  with  one 
horse." 

"That  is  my  own.  But  what  is  the  good  of 
having  rich  neighbors  if  you  cannot  drive  all 
their  horses  at  once  ?  Let  ine  hereafter  only 
associate  with  paupers." 

"  Heaven  forbid  !  I  will  tell  Andrew  to  drive 
home  and  bring  the  ponies." 

A  little  later,  Mr.  Glynn  glowered  about  him 
savagely  as  he  was  invited  out  to  tea  on  the  back 
piazza. 

"  Is  this  what  my  friend  Haviland  is  daily 
doomed  to?" 

"No,"  said  Katherine.  "In  snow-storms  we 
always  eat  in  the  house." 

"  Is  not  the  sky  a  little  threatening  ?  Or  sup 
pose  we  sup  at  my  house  on  our  return.  I  shall 


22  FIRST  LOVE  IS  BEST. 

be  sure  to  upset  these  little  tables,  and  not  a 
chair  here  is  strong  enough  to  hold  me." 

"  Of  all  forms  of  pride,"  observed  Katherine, 
pouring  tea  from  an  odd  and  ugly  little  Japanese 
teapot  into  an  equally  odd  and  ugly  little  flat 
Chinese  teacup,  —  "  of  all  forms  of  pride,  I  have 
ever  observed  that  pride  of  wealth  is  most  offen 
sive.  Pride  of  birth  presupposes  merit  in  your 
ancestors.  Pride  of  power  implies  merit  in 
yourself.  But  pride  of  money ! "  And  Katy 
handed  the  tea  with  an  air  of  ineffable  disdain, 
but  with  a  smile  that  took  all  the  sting  out  of  it. 

Mr.  Glynn  received  the  tea  in  one  hand,  and 
tested  the  stoutest  chair  with  the  other.  "  It  is 
tempting  fate,"  he  said,  seating  himself  dubi 
ously  ;  "  but  they  do  very  well  for  you." 

Indeed  they  did.  The  tables  were  anything 
but  safe,  for  the  slightest  push  would  have  sent 
them  over;  but  they  were  small  and  bright  with 
their  dainty  burdens,  and  the  honeysuckle  and 
roses,  and  the  soft  sky,  and  the  gay,  green  gar 
den,  and  the  smiling,  fresh,  happy,  young  girl 
were  certainly  very  winsome.  Mr.  Glynn  might 
bemoan  himself  for  pitfalls  which  beset  him,  but 
he  took  in  the  loveliness  of  it  all  the  same. 

"  If  only  you  w"0uld  stay  just  as  you  are,  with 
all  this  trumpery,  and  let  me  go  in  and  eat  like 
a  Christian  off  the  dining-room  table,  and  look 
at  you  through  the  window,  it  would  be  per 
fect." 


A   SENTIMENTAL  SKETCH.  23 

"It  is  perfect  as  it  is,"  said  Kitty,  compos 
edly.  "You  cannot  help  being  a  man." 

"Why,  what  has  that  to  do  with  it?"  replied 
Mr.  Glynn. 

"Only  that  being  a  man  prevents  you  from 
adding  to  the  picturesqueness.  Being  a  man, 
you  can  have  no  lines  and  no  colors.  Being  a 
man"  —  and  she  scanned  him  circumspectly  — 
"  you  must  be  gray  and  grewsome.  You  do  not 
blend.  There  is  always  a  certain  immovability 
about  a  man,  a  sort  of  obstinate,  protruding 
selfhood  that  makes  it  difficult  to  harmonize 
him  with  a  landscape.  Still,  it  is  an  estate  not 
without  its  advantages." 

"  Thank  you,  ma'am,"  said  Mr.  Glynn,  hum 
bly.  "  If  you  would  be  good  enough  to  pass  me 
your  table,  I  would  like  another  of  your  minute 
bits  of  chicken.  If  I  were  a  humming-bird,  I 
think  your  carving  would  suit  me  exactly.  But 
of  all  forms  of  pride,  pride  of  beauty  seems  to 
me  the  most  —  " 

"  There  are  the  ponies ! "  cried  Kitty.  "  O,  the 
beauties !  O,  who  would  not  be  proud  of  such 
beauty  ?  Mr.  Glynn,  there  are  a  great  many 
chickens  in  the  larder;  you  will  have  time  to 
eat  them  all  while  I  am  putting  on  my  boots. 
If  you  will  excuse  me  "  —  and  she  left  him  un 
ceremoniously  to  feel  his  way  as  best  he  could 
among  the  uncertain  toy  tables  and  the  doll 
morsels.  He  contrived,  however,  to  make  a 


24  FIRST  LOVE  IS  ZEST. 

very  substantial  repast;  and  when  he  finally 
arose,  behold,  Miss  Katherine  was  safely  be 
stowed  in  the  wagon,  awaiting  his  advent,  and 
chatting  learnedly  on  horses  with  Andrew.  Mr. 
Glynn  smilingly  took  his  seat,  gathered  the  lines 
into  his  grasp,  and  away  they  flew  over  the  hard, 
winding  roads,  under  the  greenwood  trees  and 
out  again  into  the  brilliant  western  sunshine. 

"Well,"  said  Mr.  Glynn,  when  they  had 
bowled  along  some  two  or  three  miles  without 
uttering  a  word,  "  wrhat  have  you  to  say  ?  " 

"Nothing  —  just  nothing,"  said  Katy,  with 
sparkling  eyes  and  glowing  cheeks,  and  clasped 
hands  of  intense  enjoyment. 

"  Nothing  ?  Then  I  shall  pull  up  to  a  soberer 
gait.  I  want  to  hear  you  talk." 

"  O,  one  can  talk  any  time ;  but  this  is  just 
scorning  the  earth.  It  is  power.  It  is  tram 
pling  all  things  under  your  feet.  O,  Mr.  Glynn, 
does  it  not  make  you  feel  strong  and  brave  and 
—  and  —  overpoAvering  ?  Does  it  not  seem  to 
you  now  that  you  could  do  anything  ?  " 

"No,  Miss  Kitty,  it  does  not.  At  this  mo 
ment  I  feel  myself  the  most  arrant  coward  upon 
earth." 

"  That  is  because  you  have  come  down  from 
that  splendid,  all-conquering  gait,  and  are  just 
trotting  mildly  along  in  a  subdued  sort  of  way." 

"  Which  you  do  not  like  ? '' 

"  O,  yes ;  this,  too,  is  charming,  but  in  a  dif- 


A   SENTIMENTAL  SKETCH.  25 

ferent  way.  It  is  delicious  and  tranquil.  See 
how  loosely  the  lines  lie.  The  ponies  go  of 
themselves.  All  the  evening  softness  sinks  into 
me.  Those  workmen  in  the  fields  yonder  are  a 
part  of  the  dream  of  tree  and  sky.  We  are  all 
alone  in  the  world.  And  this  is  the  whole 
world,  and  all  the  universe.  Mr.  Glynn,  are 
you  so  very,  very  rich  ?  " 

«  Why  —  yes  —  no,"  said  Mr.  Glynn,  laughing 
at  the  rapid  transition  ;  "rich  perhaps,  very  rich, 
possibly ;  but  when  it  comes  to  the  '  very,  very 
rich,'  I  think  I  must  draw  back." 

"Is  it  not  delightful,  Mr.  Glynn?  " 

"It  is  very  comfortable,  Miss  Katherine.  I 
never  did  have  a  taste  for  crusts  and  curb 
stones." 

"  No,  I  do  not  mean  that ;  but  the  command 
it  gives  you  over  time,  and  space,  and  earth,  and 
air.  Now,  we  are  rich  enough  for  comfort  and 
independence,  —  my  father  and  I.  We  do  not 
have  anxiety  for  the  morrow,  and  we  do  not 
have  hard,  grinding,  disagreeable  work  to  do. 
But  we  have  not  had  a  new,  nice,  out-and-out 
carpet  since  I  can  remember ;  and  the  house  is 
only  painted  once  in  a  generation  ;  and  my  turn 
has  not  come  yet;  and  the  horses  stiffen  their 
bones  with  working ;  and  such  a  pair  of  horses 
and  carriage  as  this  would  take  a  very  generous 
slice  out  of  our  income,  —  if  not  the  income 
itself,  —  and  are  not  to  be  dreamed  of,  even  in  a 


26  FIRST  LOVE  IS  BEST. 

delirium.  Not  that  I  am  complaining,  you  un 
derstand,"  said  Kitty,  arching  her  neck  as  indig 
nantly  as  if  she  had  been  suddenly  accused. 

"Not  at  all,"  Mr.  Glynn  hastened  to  assure 
her,  being  forewarned. 

"  It  is  only  that  I  was  thinking  how  powerful 
money  is  —  a  great  deal  of  money.  I  am  very 
happy  as  it  is,  but  to  have  oceans  of  money,  that 
would  be  brilliant  I  Still,  I  really  do  not  care." 

"  No,  indeed,  Miss  Kitty.  Money  is  extremely 
convenient.  I  am  not  the  man  to  speak  ill  of  it ; 
but  there  is  so  much  that  it  cannot  bring,  that 
sometimes  it  seems  worse  than  worthless,  a 
mockery." 

"  And,  after  all,"  continued  Katherine,  bent  on 
self-consolation,  "  what  it  brings  is  not  the  best 
things." 

"  Very  far  from  it." 

"  But  if  you  have  the  best  things,  then  money 
comes  in  very  handsomely  for  the  setting." 

"  What  do  you  mean  by  best  things?  " 

"  O,  I  mean  strength,  and  nerve,  and  will,  the 
power  to  be  grand.  I  don't  mean  simply  to  be 
good,  though  of  course  that  is  in  it ;  but  corn- 
manding  goodness." 

"  Nothing  else  ?     Friends,  for  instance  ?  " 

"Yes,  indeed;  but  we  always  have  friends. 
Besides,  friends  are  not  really  necessary." 

"  Is  that  flattering  ?  " 

"  Ver}-  pleasant,  but  not  absolutely  essential. 


A   SENTIMENTAL  SKETCH.  27 

You  can  fancy  that  it  would  be  possible  to  be 
very  happy,  inwardly  and  exultantly  happy, 
though  you  had  estranged  all  your  friends,  if  you 
could  feel  that  you  had  done  it  for  some  great 
and  adequate  cause.  But  no  love  of  friends 
could  give  you  the  least  satisfaction,  if  you  felt 
that  you  had  sacrificed  to  it  your  integrity,  your 
heroism.  So  I  say  that  friends  are  pleasant,  but 
not  necessary." 

"  Katy,  you  are  a  friend  not  only  pleasant,  but 
necessary." 

The  words  were  nothing.  Katherine  could 
have  returned  fire  a  hundred  times,  but  there 
was  a  pause  preceding  them,  and  they  were 
uttered  in  a  constrained  and  muffled  voice  that 
gave  them  an  intensity  which  silenced  and 
shocked  her.  She  sat  still  in  a  cold  tremor 
of  wonder  and  waiting. 

"  What  my  money  will  not  give  me,  Katy,  is 
you.  Will  anything  give  me  you  ?  " 

And  still  Katy  was  stunned  into  throbbing 
speechlessness. 

"  Katy,"  he  went  on,  a  little  more  clearly,  since 
she  was  clearly  not  mistress  of  the  situation, 
"  all  that  I  have  I  would  give  to  be  able  to  tell 
you  how  I  love  you.  Because,  if  I  could  tell 
you  that,  if  I  could  make  you  see  it,  I  think  you 
would  love  me  a  little  in  return,  I  think  you 
could  not  turn  wholly  away  from  me." 

"O,   please   don't,  Mr.    Glynn!     Pray,   pray 


28  FIRST  LOVE  IS  JBEST. 

don't ! "  cried  Katy,  wildly,  as  soon  as  her  yoice 
could  find  way. 

"  Must  I  not  ?  " 

"  No,  indeed !  " 

"  Am  I  then  so  disagreeable  ?  " 

"No,  indeed.  Not  at  all.  But  it  is  so  un 
natural.  I  never  thought  of  such  a  thing." 

"  Why  is  it  unnatural  ?  " 

"  O,  I  cannot  tell.  It  turns  the  world  upside 
down.  I  do  not  like  to  think  of  it.  Please  let 
us  forget  all  about  it." 

"  Miss  Kitty,"  said  Mr.  Glynn,  after  a  pause, 
"  I  do  not  mean  to  distress  you,  and  if  you  will 
let  me  say  a  few  words  more,  perhaps  we  can 
then  forget  all  about  it.  But  if  you  force  me  to 
stop  here,  it  will  be  impossible  to  forget.  Will 
you  not  trust  me  enough,  have  you  not  friend 
ship  enough  for  me,  to  hear  me  ? ' ' 

Katy  moaned  a  feeble  assent. 

"  Will  you  not,  then,  Katy,"  sweeping  into  her 
assent  a  little  more  than  his  question  contained, 
"  will  you  not  tell  me  just  how  you  feel  towards 
me?" 

"  I  don't  feel  at  all,"  said  Katy,  with  uncom 
plimentary  frankness;  but  she  was  too  much 
startled  to  disguise  the  truth.  "  I  never  thought 
about  you  at  all,  that  way." 

"But  now  that  you  do  think  of  it,  do  you 
hate  me,  and  despise  me,  and  shudder  away  from 
me?" 


A    SENTIMENTAL  SKETCH.  29 

"No  —  not  if  you  will  never  mention  this 
again." 

"But  suppose  I  will  not  promise  never  to 
mention  it  again?  Suppose  I  will  not  mention 
it  for  six  months  ?  Will  you  promise  to  think  it 
over?  " 

"  O,  no,  no,  no,  no.  I  never  can  think  of  it. 
It  never  must  be  thought  of.  It  would  spoil  all 
my  happiness  and  pleasure.  O,  Mr.  Glynn,  we 
have  liked  you  so  much,  and  it  has  all  been  so 
pleasant.  It  was  perfect.  You  were  just  as  nice 
as  nobody.  And  now  it  will  spoil  all.  O,  why 
did  you  spoil  everything  ?  "  cried  Katy,  tower 
ing  out  of  her  amazement  into  wrath  at  this 
unlooked-for  invasion  of  her  domestic  tran 
quillity,  this  unparalleled  outrage  upon  her  most 
sacred  rights. 

Poor  Mr.  Glynn  had  thought  that  he  had  made 
up  his  mind  for  every  form  of  rejection,  and  was 
fortified  at  all  points ;  yet,  after  all,  he  found 
himself  taken  by  surprise,  for  he  had  not  expect 
ed  to  be  scolded.  And  indeed,  it  must  be 
admitted  that,  though  a  proposal  of  marriage 
from  a  respectable  and  responsible  gentleman 
may  be  declined  by  a  young  woman,  it  is  not 
usually  considered  a  flagrant  offence  against 
propriety. 

"  But,  Katy,"  said  Mr.  Glynn,  gently,  "  noth 
ing  need  be  spoiled.  If  it  was  nice  and  pleasant 
before,  it  can  still  be  pleasant,  even  if  it  never 


30  FIRST  LOVE  IS  BEST. 

can  be  anything  more.  You  will  not  shut  the 
door  against  me  ?  " 

"  But  it  never  will  be  the  same  again.  You 
will  be  thinking  something.  I  know  you  will 
be  thinking  something,"  said  Kate,  viciously. 

"And,  Katy,  if  I  really  have  been  nice  and 
pleasant  to  you,  why  —  " 

"You  are  thinking  it  now!  after  what  I 
said.  O,  Mr.  Glynn,  I  have  lost  you.  There  is 
no  use.  Let  us  go  home." 

"  Let  me  talk  to  you  a  little,  Katy.  I  will  not 
tease  you  about  this.  I  will  not  urge  you  or 
worry  you  ;  but  let  me  speak  as  if  it  were  some 
other  persons  than  you  and  I.  This  all  comes 
suddenly  to  you,  Katy.  I  suppose  I  have  made 
a  very  awkward  bungle  of  it  all.  Perhaps  that 
made  no  difference.  But  there  has  never  been  a 
day  since  I  first  knew  you,  when  you  were  a 
little  toddling  baby,  and  I  a  great  lonely,  bash 
ful,  awkward  boy,  that  you  have  not  been  the 
dearest  and  sweetest  and  —  heavenliest  thing  in 
my  life." 

A  great  pang  tore  Katherine's  heart,  but  she 
said  nothing. 

"  Can't  you  tell  me  what  it  is  that  makes  me 
repugnant  to  you  ?  " 

"  O,  you  are  not  repugnant  at  all,"  groaned 
Katy,  in  despair  at  being  able  ever  to  make  him 
understand.  "  You  are  not  repugnant,  only  — 
indifferent." 


A   SENTIMENTAL  SKETCH.  31 

The  poor  man  may  have  winced  inwardly, 
but  he  gave  no  sign. 

"  You  mean  that  you  do  not  care  about  me  one 
way  or  the  other  ?  " 

"In  the  way  that  you  mean  —  yes.  I  have 
always  liked  you  as  you  are  —  well  enough  —  a 
good  deal." 

"  Why,  then,  does  it  seem  so  impossible  to  you 
that  your  liking  should  ever  grow  into  anything 
else  ?  You  have  never  —  O,  Katy,  forgive  me 
—  but  I  have  so  much  at  stake.  Do  you  love 
any  one  else?" 

"  No,  indeed!  "  said  Katherine,  as  energetically 
as  if  she  were  repelling  an  unjust  accusation. 
"  I  have  never  seen  any  one  ;  "  dismissing  with 
a  superb,  unconscious  scorn,  a  tolerably  large 
circle  of  male  acquaintances. 

"  You  have  seen  a  good  many  people  ?  " 

"  None  of  any  account,"  said  Katy,  tranquilly ; 
"  no  one  that  was  worth  while.  Still,  I  know 
exactly  what  he  would  be."  Then  she  blushed, 
and  that  somehow  encouraged  her  lover. 

"  And  you  think  I  never  could  become  that  ?  " 

"  O,  no  ;  you  are  —  " 

"What?" 

"  Nothing  bad  at  all ;  only  —  " 

"  Only  what  ?  " 

"O,  why  do  you  make  me  say  things  I  don't 
want  to  say,  and  ought  not  to  say,  and  it  is 
brutal  to  say  ?  " 


32  FTRST  LOVE  IS  BEST. 

"Because,  Katy,  I  want  to  know  everything 
that  is  in  your  mind.  What  am  I  that  you  can 
not  get  over  ?  " 

Katy  looked  up  into  his  face,  and  away  across 
the  fields,  and  down  upon  her  helpless  hands, 
and  wished  sorely  that  the  horses  would  run 
away,  or  the  wagon  break  down;  but  nothing 
of  the  sort  happened,  and  still  lie  waited  for  an 
answer,  and  in  a  sort  of  remorseful  desperation 
she  faltered  out,  — 

"  Only  — just  —  commonplace" 

He  stared  at  her. 

"Not  for  a  neighbor,  you  know,"  pursued 
Katy,  rather  incoherently ;  "  or  your  father's 
friend  —  or  —  or  —  a  husband  —  somebody  else's 
—  but, —  O,  just  think  of  giving  up  all  your 
dreams  for  —  a  —  banker — that  you  have  known 
as  long  as  you  can  remember  !  " 

The  response  to  this  dreadful  revelation  was  a 
downright  hearty  laugh  —  very  inappropriate  to 
a  discarded  lover ;  but  what  can  you  expect  in  a 
banker  ? 

"  You  dear  little  puss,"  said  that  common 
place,  good-natured  man. 

"  Why ! "  ejaculated  Katherine,  somewhat 
amazed  and  discomfited,  "  I  thought  you  would 
feel  badly." 

"  Not  at  all.  I  am  a  banker.  Why  should  I 
try  to  blink  it  out  of  sight.  If  you  had  dis 
approved  of  a  burglar,  now,  perhaps  I  should 
have  had  something  to  say." 


A   SENTIMENTAL  SKETCH.  33 

"  You  are  laughing  at  me,"  said  Katy,  ruefully. 

"  Partly,  perhaps,  but  partly  also  because  I  am 
glad  it  is  no  worse." 

"  It  is  just  as  bad  as  it  can  be,  now.  It  would 
not  be  any  worse  if  it  were  worse,"  said  Katy, 
lucidly. 

"  Katy,"  he  continued,  when  they  had  gone 
on  for  some  time  in  silence,  "you  don't  want 
to  be  teased,  and  I  have  promised  not  to  tease 
you.  Let  me  speak  this  once  and  make  an 
end  of  it.  I  love  you.  That  is  the  beginning, 
and  the  middle,  and  the  end,  and  that  never  can 
be  changed.  But  I  cannot  dragoon  you  into 
loving  me.  Let  everything  be  just  as  it  was 
before.  Do  not  be  embarrassed.  Do  not  be 
afraid  to  be  just  as  free  and  friendly  as  you  have 
always  been.  I  will  not  misunderstand  you.  I 
promise  you  to  take  no  advantage  of  it.  Order 
me,  use  me,  scold  me,  be  kind  to  me  as  you  have 
always  been ;  but  let  me  stay  near  you,  and  be 
still  your  neighbor  and  friend.  And  by  friend, 
Katy,  I  mean  such  a  friend  as  never  was  —  a 
friend  who  will  give  you  everything,  more  than 
friendship,  and  will  ask  for  nothing  again.  Will 
you  remember,  Katy,  that  here  is  a  man  who 
loves  you,  and  to  whom,  since  you  cannot  love 
him,  the  greatest  happiness  you  can  give  is 
the  opportunity  of  serving  you?  Count  just  as 
confidently  on  me  as  if  I  were  to  you  all  that 
you  are  to  me.  Will  you  do  that,  Katy?" 
3 


34  FIRST  LOVE  IS  BEST. 

"  Why  —  if  I  can  —  yes,  Mr.  Glynn ;  but  you 
are  very  generous." 

"  I  am  not  generous  at  all,  only  selfish.  I 
want  to  save  myself  from  an  utterly  dreary  life, 
that  is  all.  Don't  say,  If  you  can,  Katy.  Say 
that  you  will.  I  have  great  faith  in  your  word." 

"  I  don't  know  that  I  quite  understand." 

"  If  you  and  your  father  were  in  any  trouble, 
had  been  before  to-day,  would  you  not  have 
come  to  me  first?" 

"  Yes,  certainly.     That  is,  he  would." 

"  Do  just  the  same  now.  And  when  you  are 
not  in  trouble  —  always  —  be  just  the  same  as 
you  have  been.  Forget  all  that  I  have  said,  and 
let  us  be  on  the  same  footing  as  yesterday,  ex 
cept  that  you  know  now  —  what  you  did  not 
know  then  —  that  all  my  life  and  soul  are  in 
you,  and  that  my  happiness  is  in  your  friend 
ship.  Friendship,  mind,  is  all  I  ask." 

And  Katy  so  little  appreciated,  and  so  little 
deserved  the  generous  love  of  a  sincere,  if  some 
what  limited  nature,  that  she  could  go  home  and 
tear  his  passion  to  tatters  this  way :  — 

"ANSWERED.  . 

"  Gold,  and  gear,  and  princely  birthright,  —  take  the  gilded  trum 
pery  up ! 

Life  may  bring  me  gall  and  wormwood,  but  I  scorn  your  hon 
eyed  cup. 

Meekness  lends  its  graceful  semblance  as  you  come  with  bended 
knee, 

But  I  read  your  inmost  soul,  and  I  know  its  mockery. 


A  SENTIMENTAL  SKETCH.  35 

"  Ha !  your  white  hand,  diamond-flashing,  it  would  clasp  my  hand, 

forsooth ! 

You  would  condescend  to  give  your  name  in  barter  for  my  youth. 
At  your  footstool  I  should  grateful  lay  my  eager  spirit  down, 
You  would  stoop  and  place  the  jewel  somewhat  kindly  in  your 

crown ! 

"  Long  the  doubt  has  been,  and  bitter  was  the  trial  to  your  pride. 
Should  you  through  those   grand  old  portals  lead  a  nameless, 

dowcrless  bride  ? 

Should  the  blood  to  you  transmitted  in  a  pure,  untainted  flow, 
Through  a  thousand  generations,  now  a  base  admixture  know  ? 

"  Up  rose  love  and  showed  the  maiden,  as  you  saw  her  day  by  day, 
How  the  magic  of  her  presence  wrought  red  gold  of  coarsest  clay, 
How  her  grateful  love  would  halo  with  its  warmth  your  calm, 

cold  life, 
And  her  gracious  service  be  the  guerdon  that  you  called  her  wife  ! 

"  So  you  breathed  a  requiescat  to  the  dead  within  their  graves. 
'Blood  is  strong,  but  love  is  stronger;  blood  claims  service,  love 

makes  slaves.' 

Thus  with  smiling  self-excuse  far  flung  back  my  garden-gate, 
Soothing  Pride's   Cerberean   mouths  with  the  home-made  sop 

of  Fate. 

"Listen !    When  we  stood  last  evening  underneath  the  apple-tree, 
And  you,  in  your  self-complacence,  dared  to  speak  those  word? 

to  me,  — 

Dared  invade  my  tropic  summer  with  your  pale  and  nerveless  cold, 
Dared  to  set  your  tawdry  tinsel  off  against  my  beaten  gold ; 

"  Though  my  heart  flamed  out  in  passion  fit  to  scathe  you  where 

you  stood, 

Flinging  up  your  puny  soul  blindly  to  my  womanhood,  — 
Yet  I  spared  you,  for  the  past's  sake,  thinking  it  were  better  so, 
Bade  my  white  lips  hide  their  scorning,  and  breathe  back  a 

kindly  No. 

"Fool !  that  would  not  be  enlightened  by  the  simple  words  I  spoke, 
For  the  threefold  brazen  armor  of  your  pride  turned  back  the 
stroke, 


36  FIRST  LOVE  IS  BEST. 

But  must  goad  my  slender  patience  with  your  weak  essays  to  win, 
Though  I  stab  you  to  the  heart,  shall  my  soul  be  free  of  sin ! 

"Listen!    Were    you    humblest   ploughboy,   horny   hands    em 
browned  with  toil, 

Scanty  life  for  soul  and  body  wresting  from  a  surly  soil, 
And  an  honest  heart  had  proffered,  with  its  holy  deeps  all  stirred, 
Baby-breath  had  not  been  softer  than  my  sorely  smiting  word. 

"Wherefore  prate  of  summer  mornings,  musical  with  laugh  and 

song  ? 

Do  not  airs  from  Trovatore  make  a  summer  day  less  long  ? 
llippling  laughter  in  the  pauses —  was  it  never  heard  before  ? 
Did  I  blush  and  smile  for  you,  sir  ?    So  I  did  for  twenty  more ! 

"  But  in  singing,  did  I  ever  sing  my  mother's  songs  to  you  ? 
Did  a  silver  silence  ever  fall  upon  us  with  the  dew  ? 
Did  we  ever  wander  vaguely  from  the  common  ways  of  speech, 
Or  the  soul  scale  higher  summits  than  the  lips  essayed  to  reach  ? 

"  If  I  frolic  in  the  garden  with  my  keen-eyed  pointer  here, 
Docs  it  justify  his  claiming  to  be  recognized  my  peer  ? 
Oil  the  banners  of  my  jesting,  to  all  common  eyes  unfurled, 
Shall  be  read  the  Open  Sesame  to  my  divinest  world  ? 

"  Faith,  born  of  self-adulation,  holds  in  store  but  inward  smart, 
You  could  move  me,  but  not  sway  me  —  while  my  time,  not  touch 

my  heart. 

If,  in  your  blind  ego-worship,  some  dim  phantom  passed  before  you, 
Must  I  vindicate  my  womanhood  by  kneeling  to  adore  you  ? 

"  Go  your  way.    The  world  is  wider  than  that  you  and  I  should  tend 
With  unequal  steps  discordant,  down  one  pathway  to  the  end. 
Leave  me,  if  so  be  the  silence  soothe  me  to  a  calmer  state ; 
Leave  me,  lest,  with  petty  urgencc,  my  indifference  change  to  hate. 

"June's  fresh  roses,  bloom  above  me !    Bud  and  blossom,  hide  my 

pain ! 

Murmuring  music,  lull  my  senses !    Subtile  odors,  pierce  my  brain 
0,  to  sleep  a  hundred  cycles,  if  the  guerdou  they  should  bring 
Were  a  thrill  along  my  pulses  at  the  coming  of  The  King !  " 


A   SENTIMENTAL  SKETCH,  37 

All  of  which  was  not  only  very  haughty  and 
disagreeable,  but  unjust  and  misrepresenting; 
since  Mr.  Glynn,  though  richer  than  Miss  Havi- 
land,  was  not,  and  never  claimed  to  be,  better 
born,  was  the  farthest  in  the  world  from  purse- 
proud,  never  wore  nor  owned  a  diamond  in  his 
life,  and  had  wooed  her  with  all  modesty,  devo 
tion,  and  deference.  But  Katy,  like  all  immor 
tal  poets,  only  needed  a  picket-point  of  fact  to 
start  her  fancies  from,  and  away  they  flew,  out 
of  sight  and  sound  and  earthly  recognition. 
Quoting  from  memory,  I  believe  I  have  left  out 
some  of  the  stanzas;  but  here  are  enough.  I 
should  apologize  rather  for  giving  so  many  than 
for  not  giving  all.  It  is  appalling  to  reflect  that 
at  this  moment  there  are  probably  ten  thousand 
girls  in  our  beloved  country  wreaking  their 
emotions  in  just  such  verse.  Sad  stuff  as  it  all 
was,  Kate  thought  it  was  good,  and  on  a  sudden 
audacious  impulse  sent  it  off  to  "  Harper's 
Monthly,"  walking  five  miles  to  the  next  village 
to  deposit  it  in  a  post-office  not  familiar  with 
her  handwriting.  Thereupon  was  she  instantly 
panic-struck  lest  Mr.  Glynn  should  see  and 
know  the  poem,  and  experienced  a  strong  re 
action  in  his  favor  as  being  most  unfairly 
treated.  Luckily,  "  Harper's  Monthly  "  had  an 
editor  who  knew  that  it  would  never  do  to  make 
up  his  moon  of  such  green  cheese  as  this,  and 
sent  it  back  to  her  with  a  respectful  intimation 


38 


FIRST  LOVE  IS  BEST. 


that  she  had  read  Elizabeth  Barrett  Browning 
to  some  purpose.  Kate's  relief  at  having  the 
offending  verses  under  her  own  control  again 
completely  extinguished  her  literary  mortifica 
tion  at  their  rejection,  and  she  felt  greatly  elated 
at  the  thought  that  she  had  got  near  enough  to 
Mrs.  Browning  to  be  suspected  of  attempting  to 
imitate  her.  So,  on  the  whole,  she  came  off 
much  more  handsomely  than  she  deserved. 


III. 

AS  for  Mr.  Glynn,  the  most  casual  observer 
cannot  fail  to  see  that  he  was  no  expert  in 
affairs  of  the  heart.  All  the  experience  he  had 
ever  had  was  the  very  simple  one  of  loving  Katy 
out  and  out,  boy  and  man,  straight  along  for 
about  eighteen  years.  That  he  was  a  rather 
slow-going,  stupid  sort  of  man,  this  single  fact  is 
enough  to  indicate.  Nevertheless,  in  this  par 
ticular  case,  I  think  he  was  as  wise,  and  his  un 
educated  instinct  and  unpractised  heart  led  him 
to  as  true  a  course,  as  if  he  had  flirted  with  a 
dozen  women  in  the  course  of  the  eighteen  years. 
For,  in  spite  of  all  his  magnificent  renunciation 
of  love  and  love-talk,  there  was  the  one  fact 
securely  lodged  in  Katy's  mind,  and  thence  easily 
transmissible  to  her  heart  —  that  he  loved  her  ; 
and  in  spite  of  himself,  all  his  old  kindness  and 
friendliness  and  home  w*ays  would  take  on  a  new 
tenderness,  would  have  for  Katy  a  new  meaning ; 
and  as  Mr.  Glynn  was,  and  knew  himself  to  be, 
an  honest  man,  albeit  no  hero,  a  man  of  prin- 

39 


40  FIRST  LOVE  IS  BEST. 

ciple  and  intelligence,  of  honorable  fame  and 
gentle  manners,  Katy's  ideal  knight  was  in  im 
minent  danger  of  being  gradually  dethroned, 
and  of  finding  a — banker  —  reigning  in  his  stead. 
Of  course,  this  might  never  happen;  but  if  it 
ever  could  happen,  surely  he  took  the  right  way 
to  make  it  happen.  Katy's  suspicions  and  ap 
prehensions  being  lulled  to  sleep,  —  and  perhaps 
the  enemy's  too,  —  there  was  nothing  for  the 
enemy  to  do  but  noiselessly  march  in  and  take 
possession,  without  any  especial  consciousness  or 
design  on  either  side. 

Whether  Mr.  Glynn  deliberately  thought  this 
out  with  malice  prepense,  or  whether  he  simply 
acted  from  the  impulse  of  the  moment,  I  do 
not  know.  The  latter,  most  likely  ;  but  it  would 
not  have  been  so  very  bad  a  thought  if  he  had 
thought  it. 

But  it  seemed  otherwise  to  the  gods.  Down 
upon  the  scene,  down  into  Katherine's  life,  down 
upon  Mr.  Glynn's  hopes  and  plans,  to  his  infinite 
discomposure,  swooped  Mr.  Walter  Laballe,  tall, 
dark,  gay.  rather  handsome,  frank,  careless,  with 
impressive  eyes  that  could  be  pensive,  and  with 
a  certain  devotedness  of  manner  that  was  quite 
natural  to  him  and  became  him  wonderfully. 
He  was  born  to  the  patronymic  Ball,  and  chris 
tened  Samuel  Walters,  and  had  been  tossed  up 
through  his  childhood  as  simple  Sam  Ball,  —  all 
of  which  he  told  Katherine  with  a  laughing 


A   SENTIMENTAL  SKETCH.  41 

grace  that  quite  robbed  the  fact  of  what  other 
wise  might  have  been  considered  finical.  But 
when  he  grew  old  enough  to  pursue  historical 
investigations,  he  discovered,  or  decided  that  he 
discovered,  descent  from  an  old  Huguenot  fam 
ily  exiled  for  principle,  La  Balle  by  name  ;  and 
solely  out  of  compliment  to  them  —  he  assured 
Katherine  —  he  had  reinvested  the  somewhat 
demoralized  and  curtailed  name  with  its  ancient 
dignity.  For  the  discarded  Samuel  he  had  no 
better  excuse  than  a  distaste  for  the  Sam  into 
which  it  usually  degenerated,  and  he  merely 
sent  the  final  letter  of  his  middle  name  to  keep 
it  company.  He  had  lived  in  different  cities,  he 
had  been  abroad,  he  knew  a  great  deal  of  the 
world  —  at  least,  so  it  seemed  to  Katherine,  who 
knew  very  little  of  it.  He  could  ride,  and  row, 
and  play  croquet,  and,  better  than  all,  he  could 
sit  under  the  trees  the  long,  shimmering  summer 
mornings  through,  and  recite  poetry,  and  talk 
eloquently  of  all  things  in  heaven  and  earth. 
And  sometimes  there  came  into  his  eyes  a 
dreamy  sadness,  and  into  his  voice  a  patient 
pathos  —  the  lingering  echo  of  a  half  forgotten 
sorrow,  —  that  won  for  him  Katy's  young  and 
ready  sympathy  or  ever  he  had  so  much  as  be 
spoken  it. 

He  was  spending  his  vacation  with  family 
connections  in  Katherine's  vicinity,  though  of 
his  occupation  when  he  was  not  taking  a  va- 


42  FIRST  LOVE  IS  BEST. 

cation  Katherine  had  but  a  vague  idea.  His 
cousins  he  found  rather  dull,  which  did  not  sur 
prise  Katherine,  as  she  had  found  them  rather 
dull  herself,  though  she  did  not  say  so.  And  so 
it  got  to  be  that  the  mornings  were  very  few  in 
which  he  did  not  saunter  in  on  his  way  from  the 
post-office,  and  sit  down  to  read  his  letters  and 
papers  on  the  shady  piazza ;  and  the  evenings 
were  few  that  did  not  find  them  together:  at 
first  playing  croquet  on  the  grassy  slope  that 
served  for  a  lawn,  then  resting  on  their  mallets 
as  they  discussed  earnestly  some  interesting 
theme ;  and  then  gradually  croquet  and  mallets 
were  left  behind,  and  they  strolled  slowly 
through  the  orchard,  or  down  by  the  brook,  till 
the  evening  dew  lay  heavy  on  the  earth  and  the 
happy  stars  sparkled  in  the  perfumed  sky. 

And  Mr.  Glynn  looked  on  with  bitter  pain. 
He  had  borne  that  Kitty  had  said  him  no,  for 
he  looked  forward  to  long  companionship,  and 
tender  waiting,  and  ever  present  friendliness, 
and  she  was  so  dear  to  him  that  that  was  almost 
happiness  enough;  and  at  the  end  was  hope, 
unspoken,  perhaps  unacknowledged,  but  vivid 
and  vital.  And  now  this  man  had  come  in 
and  changed  the  aspect  of  all  things.  Kath 
erine  was  preoccupied.  She  was  always  kind 
and  gentle  and  polite  to  him,  never  saucy  and 
tyrannical  as  in  the  old  days.  But  he  could 
have  borne  that,  because  with  the  change  had 


A   SENTIMENTAL  SKETCH.  43 

come  also  a  half  timidity,  the  least  little  touch 
of  shyness,  that  was  infinitely  sweet  to  him. 
How  he  would  have  loved  to  watch  it,  and 
caress  it,  and  conquer  it !  How  he  fed  his  fancy 
with  the  delight  of  living  all  outside  of  Katy  as 
it  were,  yet  bringing  all  his  force  of  will  and 
love  to  her  subjugation!  She  should  imagine 
herself  free.  She  should  suppose  her  decision 
final.  She  should  fancy  him  to  have  relinquished 
all  intention  in  any  other  direction  than  that  of 
friendship.  But  he  knew  now  that  he  had  made 
no  such  relinquishment.  He  had  not  even  men 
tally  framed  the  resolution;  but  he  meant,  if 
there  was  any  strength  in  him,  to  draw  her  to 
himself.  He  meant  to  enchain  her  in  the  same 
bonds  which  he  found  so  dear.  By  self-suppres 
sion  and  self-assertion,  by  patient  waiting  and 
eager  devotion,  by  ministering  to  her  intellect 
and  to  her  heart,  by  gratifying  her  taste  and  her 
frank,  girlish,  innocent  pride,  by  every  outlay  of 
love  and  power,  he  meant  to  fasten  upon  her  life, 
to  take  possession  of  her,  as  she  had  long  ago 
taken  him  in  thrall ;  and  he  meant  it  none  the 
less  because  he  made  no  ado  about  it,  because  he 
never  even  formulated  the  resolve  to  himself  in 
words,  but  only  silently  lived  his  purpose,  as  he 
went  to  and  fro  in  his  commonplace  banking- 
house  days. 

As  for   Katherine,  something  new  had  come 
into  her  life.     The  young  men  around  her  were 


44  FIRST  LOVE  TS  BEST. 

only  "the  boys."  They  had  grown  up  with  her, 
and  while  she  had  a  friendly  comradeship  with 
them,  she  had  not  a  particle  of  sentiment  about 
them.  Bearing  herself  towards  them  with  a 
sincere  though  superficial  cordiality,  they  had 
no  existence  in  the  world  of  dreams  which  was 
to  her  as  real,  as  absorbing,  and  as  satisfactory 
as  the  visible  universe.  But  this  man  had  come 
in  from  the  great  old-new  world  beyond  her 
horizon.  He  was  to  her  all  novel  and  mysteri 
ous.  He  was  not  a  growth  of  her  every-day 
hills,  not  tied  down  by  hours  and  cares,  not  a 
creature  of  duties  and  days'  works.  He  had  a 
past,  fruitful  of  story,  a  future  big  with  promise. 
Something  of  the  atmosphere  of  poetry  clung 
about  him.  All  his  walks  might  have  been  down 
the  paths  that  bloom  in  romance.  He  was  gay 
and  graceful,  bright  and  brave,  cavalier  and 
debonair.  He  was  never  moody ;  he  was  too 
deferential  to  be  moody;  but  sometimes  he 
seemed  to  brush  away  unshed  tears  from  the 
depths  of  some  divine  despair,  and  Katy  mused 
and  marvelled  whether  into  that  arcana  her 
trivial  feet  should  ever  be  permitted  to  tread. 
And  with  the  deepening  summer  their  compan 
ionship  and  confidence  took  on  a  deepening 
color,  and  Katy's  question  was  gradually  answer 
ing  itself. 

Walter  Laballe  told  her  of  his  past  life  some 
thing  more   than   the   half  jesting  story  of  his 


A   SENTIMENTAL  SKETCH.  45 

name.  He  told  her  in  many  a  pleasant,  pensive 
hour,  of  his  father's  early  death  and  the  loss  of 
his  mother's  fortune,  of  his  own  disappointments 
and  struggles,  of  his  hope  and  resolve  to  win 
name  and  place  ;  and  Katherine  listened  with  her 
heart  in  her  eyes,  and  gave  him  that  sweetest  of 
all  flattery,  utter  belief  and  sympathy ;  nor 
withdrew  it  when  he  remarked  one  morning,  in 
the  course  of  conversation,  that  this  had  been  so 
very  much  the  happiest  summer  of  his  life,  that 
it  should  not  even  stand  at  the  head  of  the  list. 
It  could  only  have  a  place  by  itself.  It  was  the 
summer  of  all  his  life. 

"Whereat  Katherine,  inwardly  tremulous,  but 
outwardly  bold,  remarked  carelessly  that  the 
summer  was  not  half  through  yet.  Why  be 
retrospective  ?  And  there  is  the  Indian  summer, 
too. 

"  O !  but  I  was  not  thinking  of  the  weather 
exclusively.  I  believe  I  am  under  a  spell  of 
enchantment.  The  whole  summer  seems  like  a 
dream,  and  you.  and  I  have  been  wandering 
through  it  together.  Miss  Kitty,  I  wish  it  might 
never  stop." 

"  Do  you  ?  "  said  Katy,  stupidly,  frightened  out 
of  her  senses,  but  not  shocked  or  chagrined,  as 
she  had  once  before  been. 

"  It  never  shall  stop  if  I  can  help  it,  Katy ; 
there  is  nobody  in  the  world  like  you  !  " 

And  then  it  all  came  out  —  the  old,  old  story 


46  FIRST  LOVE  IS  fiEST. 

—  when  the  language  of  flattery  ceases  to  he 
flattery,  and  became  the  all-inadequate  expression 
of  feeling  that  never  can  be  spoken  ;  when  youth, 
and  expectancy,  and  aspiration  meet  and  recog 
nize  their  own ;  and  Katherine,  with  new  and 
novel  humility,  marvelled  within  herself  what 
strange  fate  it  was  that  should  have  brought  so 
rich  an  experience  to  her.  "  My  hero,"  she  said 
softly,  "  whom  I  hardly  thought  to  see,  and 
yet  I  always  knew  I  should  see  him,  and  he 
walks  in  through  my  own  garden-gate." 

An  idea  which  Walter  always  combated 
fervently,  albeit  not  altogether  sorry  to  stand  as 
a  hero  before  the  eyes  that  looked  into  his  so  soft 
and  clear.  "  I  am  no  hero,  my  Katy.  I  am  a  sad 
humbug.  My  only  safety  is  in  making  you  so 
much  in  love  with  me  that  you  will  never  find 
me  out." 

"  Ah,  stupid ! "  would  Kate  respond,  with  pretty 
petulance,  "  he  thinks  because  he  wears  no  hel 
met  and  bears  no  sword,  he  is  no  hero.  It  is 
only  that  the  fashion  is  changed." 

"  But  I  love  pleasant  things.  It  just  suits  me 
to  sit  here  and  talk  with  you,  and  look  at  you. 
It  is  peace  after  the  long  storm  of  my  turbulent 
life.  Your  hair  is  really  brown,  but  just  as  the 
sun  lights  it  up  under  the  leaves,  it  is  all  spark 
ling  with  little  gold  stars." 

"  Because  it  is  your  vacation.  If  the  trumpet 
should  sound,  you  would  leave  all  my  gold  stars 


A   SENTIMENTAL  SKETCH.  47 

instantly  and  take  up  arms.  It  is  not  unheroic 
to  be  comfortable,  but  it  is  heroic  not  to  mind 
comfort,  or  think  of  it  when  a  grand  thing  is  to 
be  done." 

"  But  it  would  not  be  a  grand  thing  to  leave 
you,  Katy ;  and  I  will  not  do  it  for  any  war  or 
battle  sound  that  is  to  be  heard  the  world  around. 
So  you  must  make  up  your  mind  to  it."  And 
the  dark,  handsome  eyes  looked  into  Katherine's 
with  such  a  careless  arrogance,  such  a  laughing 
confidence  of  love,  that  Katherine  bent  to  the 
love  and  the  arrogance,  and  held  the  carelessness 
and  self-scorn  to  be  only  raillery,  as  they  were, 
and  dreamed  her  dreams  of  heaven  all  the 
same. 

And  as  the  happy  summer  droned  on,  honey- 
sweet  with  bee  and  bird  and  blossom,  heavy- 
scented  and  vocal,  opening  all  the  world  to  the 
heavens  by  day  and  by  night,  the  little  hamlet 
was  thronged  with  summer  guests ;  and  in  the 
round  of  garden  parties,  and  boating  parties, 
berry  parties,  and  bug-huntings,  and  picnics,  and 
amusements  of  all  sorts,  Walter  Laballe  took 
a  prominent  part.  Katherine  had  no  especial 
knack  at  organizing  or  executing  amusements  — 
simply,  perhaps,  that  she  found  life  so  exceed 
ingly  interesting  that  she  felt  no  need  of  amuse 
ments  herself,  or  that  she  really  lacked  the  devis 
ing  faculty ;  but  she  made  an  excellent  audience. 
Without  the  ability  to  be  a  leader,  she  was  sin- 


48  FIRST  LOVE  IS  BEST. 

gularly  successful  as  rank  and  file.  It  tired  her 
merely  to  think  of  the  paraphernalia  of  prepa 
ration,  but  when  there  was  a  call  for  sympathetic 
enjoyment  and  admiration,  Katherine  came  to 
the  front.  Mr.  Laballe,  on  the  contrary,  was 
first  and  foremost  in  every  plan.  If  it  was 
drama  or  tableau,  he  was  the  cleverest  of  all 
obdurate  fathers,  or  knightly  warriors,  or  princely 
suitors.  If  it  was  Shaker-singing,  the  sheet  was 
wrapped  about  him  with  the  foiiornest  asperity, 
his  countenance  was  marked  with  the  deepest 
gloom,  his  voice  intoned  the  drollest,  the  most 
lugubrious  cadences.  If  it  was  charades,  he 
found  the  best  words  and  made  the  wittiest  of 
conversation.  In  rowing,  in  croquet,  in  anagram, 
in  the  Virginia  reel,  in  clam-chowder,  and  fried 
potatoes  on  the  rocks,  in  every  form  of  fun,  he 
was  ready,  fertile,  indefatigable.  Kate  was 
invaluable  when  it  came  to  inspiring  the  actors 
with  "  inextinguishable  laughter,"  or  sitting  in 
the  stern  of  the  boat  with  speechless  delight  in  the 
molten  water  and  glowing  sky.  She  could  even 
bear  a  respectable  hand  in  croquet  if  she  were 
allowed  to  shove  and  cheat  when  necessary,  to 
take  a  mallet's  length  with  or  without  reason, 
and  quietly  lift  her  ball  to  the  desired  side  of  the 
wicket.  But  she  really  found  far  more  pleasure 
in  looking  on  —  admiring  Mr.  Laballe's  splendid 
split-shots,  the  easy  sweep  of  his  oars,  his  vigor 
ous  and  vigilant  ladling  of  hot  soup  —  than  in  any 


A    SENTIMENTAL  SKETCH.  49 

more  personal  share  in  whatever  was  going  on. 
"  Happy  me  !  "  would  Katy  muse.  "  He  does 
everything  well.  How  came  all  this  to  me  when 
it  is  just  what  I  wanted?  His  lightest  touch  is 
grace  and  vigor.  How  strong  he  must  be  in  real 
things?  He  who  is  so  admirable  in  trifles,  how 
all-commanding  when  he  takes  hold  on  life ! 
Wretched  me  !  I  can  do  nothing  well.  I  can  do 
almost  nothing  in  any  way.  I  am  not  good 
enough  for  him.  O,  I  am  not  fit  for  him.  He 
should  have  fallen  in  love  with  a  royal  woman  — 
tall,  and  statuesque,  and  fascinating  —  a  superb 
woman  who  could  sing  the  wild  woods  into  hush, 
and  walk  sister  and  wife  of  the  gods,  and  —  " 
By  that  time  a  new  scene  had  opened,  and  Kathe- 
rine  was  called  on  to  admire  Mr.  Laballe  anew, 
as  he  stooped,  in  the  character  of  Leicester,  over 
some  pretty  imploring  Amy  Robsart,  —  and  so 
never  quite  gave  him  up  to  the  superb  Juno,  to 
whom  the  fascinating  creature  really  belonged. 

Mr.  Glynn  seldom  mingled  in  these  gay  com 
panies.  As  Mr.  Laballe  rose  above  the  horizon, 
Mr.  Glynn  sunk  out  of  sight.  His  visits  to 
Kate's  father,  even,  diminished,  to  that  gentle 
man's  consciousness  and  dissatisfaction.  When 
ever  Kate  met  him  she  was  almost  over-kind. 
At  home  she  could  never  quite  free  herself  from 
embarrassment;  but  in  company  she  talked  to 
him,  she  deferred  to  him,  she  showed  him 
every  sign  of  regard,  respect,  and  even  honor,  so 
4 


50  FIRST  LOVE  IS  BEST. 

that  he  felt  in  his  deepest  heart  that  there  was 
no  hope  for  him,  that  his  cause  was  lost.  Katy 
was  trying  to  make  up  to  him  in  what  he  did  not 
want  for  what  she  could  not  give. 

When  the  summer  festivities  broke  up  and 
the  summer  sojourners  began  to  go,  Katherine 
was  not  sorry.  She  lapsed  again  into  the  life 
that  she  loved  best.  Light,  pleasant  household 
work,  tidy,  thrifty  housewifely  cares,  replenish 
ing,  rearranging,  freshening,  brightening;  over 
looking  stores  of  spotless,  sweet-smelling  napery, 
redding  and  refilling  ample  closets,  devising  little 
plans  for  kitchen  convenience  and  kitchen  pleas 
ure  ;  darning  the  flour-sieve  with  a  fine  wire 
thread,  greatly  to  Tishy's  astonishment  and 
admiration ;  and  changing  the  outworn  of  the 
old  red  sandstone  period,  as  Katy  used  to  say, 
into  the  bright  and  new  of  the  alluvial  age  ;  in 
short,  making  all  common  things  snug,  comforta 
ble,  and  agreeable,  —  such  was  Katy's  ignoble 
but  interesting  work ;  and  from  the  depths  of 
the  camphor-chest,  and  the  inmost  recesses  of  the 
china  closet,  her  voice  rang  out  as  blithe  and 
free  as  if  she  had  been  singing  to  the  listening 
spheres.  Then  the  solid  delight  of  reading  — 
novels,  history,  essays,  poetry  —  torn  copies  of 
Godey's  Lady's  Book,  and  the  American  Tract 
Society's  stirring  Appeals  to  the  Sinner  in  con 
venient  barrels  "up  garret;  "  Whelpley's  Bacon, 
and  Burton's  "  Anatomy  of  Melancholy  ; "  and 


A   SENTIMENTAL  SKETCH.  51 

poor  old  Charlotte  Temple,  in  their  own,  not  over 
stocked  library,  —  everything  that  she  could  buy, 
borrow,  or  otherwise  lay  hands  on,  good,  bad 
and  indifferent,  that  was  Katherine's  solace  and 
society.  And  O,  the  exquisite  rapture  of  long, 
solitary  walks  through  the  wild,  wet  woods, 
cushioned  with  heavy  moss,  alive  with  every 
grace  of  springing  vine  and  drooping  spray ; 
over  the  dry,  crisp  hills  pungent  with  the  breath 
of  the  Indian  summer,  delicious  with  the  melan 
choly  of  departing  bloom  and  the  languor  of 
reposing  growth!  Beyond  the  encircling  line  of 
dense,  blue  sea,  Katy's  thought  was  wont  to 
penetrate  into  the  romance  and  mystery  of  the 
wise  old  world,  and  sometimes,  by  some  mirage, 
the  far  sea  swept  its  white  beach  inland,  and  lay 
in  a  lovely  amethystine  haze  over  against  the 
still,  low-lying  fields  that  stretched  at  the 
maiden's  feet.  All  this  had  been  rapture  when 
only  an  atmosphere  of  dreams  enveloped  her. 
Now  the  soft  skies  bent  over  her  as  of  old,  and 
the  smoky  hills  rose  warm  around  her,  and  the 
yellow  sunshine  trembled  into  her  most  secret 
heart ;  but  the  banner  over  all  was  love.  So,  for 
Katy's  happiness,  there  was  no  speech  nor  lan 
guage. 


fTUIE  only  drawback  was  a  lack  of  warmth  in 
JL  her  father's  liking  for  her  lover.  He  did  not 
oppose  him.  He  seldom  thought  of  opposing 
Katy  in  anything.  Nor  is  it  to  be  conjectured 
that  he  was  in  the  least  degree  chagrined  that 
Mr.  Glynn  and  Katy  could  not  make  up  their 
minds  to  each  other.  Katherine  had  never  lisped 
to  her  father  a  syllable  of  Mr.  Glynn's  wish,  and 
Mr.  Haviland  was  an  innocent,  straightforward, 
royal  old  gentleman,  who  had  seen  little  Kate  and 
big  Richard  Glynn  growing  up  together,  the  latter 
having  the  start  by  a  respectable  and  disarming 
number  of  years,  and  he  never  any  more  thought 
of  a  marriage  between  them  than  between  the 
two  rose-bushes  hob-a-nobbing  at  the  garden-gate. 
In  fact,  it  was  a  good  deal  of  a  shock  to  him  to 
come  all  of  a  sudden  upon  Kate  as  a  grown-up 
girl.  It  never  disturbed  him  in  the  least  that 
Mr.  Glynn  should  come  to  his  house.  Mr. 
Glynn  had  always  been  coming  to  his  house. 
The  various  young  men  and  maidens  who  pulled 

52 


A   SENTIMENTAL  SKETCH.  53 

his  latch-string  were  but  the  boys  and  girls  who 
had  grown  up  with  Katy.  A  woman  might 
have  enlightened  him.  But  the  one  woman  of 
his  life  had  gone  out  of  his  sight  long  years 
before,  and,  alone  as  he  was,  it  was  probably  for 
his  happiness  that  there  was  no  one  else  to 
ravage  the  late-lingering  bliss  of  his  ignorance. 
But  when  "Walter  Laballe  came,  there  was  no 
misunderstanding  the  situation  longer.  This 
was  no  old  schoolmate  chatting  with  a  girl  about 
old  times,  but  a  man  grown,  come  out  of  the 
great  world,  wooing  Kate  as  a  woman ;  and  Mr. 
Haviland  sorrowfully  tried  to  comprehend  it,  and 
adjust  himself  to  it.  What  he  would  have 
liked,  what  he,  perhaps,  unconsciously  hoped  for, 
was  a  continuance  of  things  exactly  as  they  had 
been.  Katy,  home  from  school,  Katy  about  the 
house,  cheerful,  courageous,  energetic,  if  some 
times  a  little  dreamy  and  impracticable  on  the  one 
side,  a  little  impatient,  impetuous,  and  imperious 
on  the  other  —  striking  out  occasionally  into  the 
border-lands  of  home,  but  never  overstepping  their 
boundary-line;  gone  only  long  enough  to  give 
the  zest  of  return,  and  coming  back  with  fresh 
store  of  pleasant  girl-gossip  of  church  and  state, 
of  science  and  society,  and  every  living  thing 
under  the  sun,  —  Katy,  the  bright  Hnk  between 
his  past  and  his  future,  the  rosy,  radiant  medium 
through  which  the  world  looked  in  upon  him, 
and  he  out  upon  the  world,  —  this  was  what  he 


56  FIRST  LOVE  IS  BEST. 

"  Says  he  is  waiting  for  a  summons  from  his 
partner,  I  suppose." 

"Lays  it  all  to  me.  Says  he  should  have 
gone  to  town  a  month  ago  but  for  me.  Did  you 
ever  hear  the  like  of  that,  when  I  have  a  fresh 
surprise  every  day  at  seeing  him  ?  " 

"  But,  my  dear,  he  is  a  jroung  man,  and  with 
out  money,  and  he  has  made  no  real  start  in  life 
yet." 

"Yes,  dear,  I  know  he  is  poor.  He  has  no 
money.  That  is  the  only  point  on  which  we  are 
really  equal  —  " 

"  No,  Katherine,  you  are  not  equal  there.  It 
is  not  right  to  say  you  have  no  money.  You  are 
not  rich,  but  I  have  provided  for  your  comfort 
and  independence  as  long  as  you  live." 

"  That  you  have,  you  dear  old  daddy !  I  could 
not  be  a  happier  girl  if  you  had  earned  millions. 
So  I  can't  be  frightened  at  poverty,  or  be  wor 
ried  because  Walter  is  not  rich." 

"  Nor  I  either,  Katy.  It  is  not  poverty  I  am 
thinking  of,  though  you  know  nothing  about 
poverty,  and  I  hope  you  never  will.  But  the 
habits  that  prevent  poverty  are  the  thing." 

"  Habits  !  Walter's  habits  !  O,  my  dear, 
what  are  you  thinking  of?  " 

"  Of  you,  Katy.  Always  and  only  of  you, 
my  child." 

"  That  is  a  wicked  story,  now ;  for  I  know  you 
are  thinking  of  poor  Walter,  whose  habits  are 


A   SENTIMENTAL  SKETCH.  57 

perfect.  That  is,  he  does  smoke  ;  I  wish  he  did 
not;  I  admit  I  wish  he  did  not.  But,  as  he  says, 
very  truly,  '  What  else  do  I  do  ?  Tolerate  this 
one  little  wickedness.'  And  I  confess,  papa,  that 
with  the  closest  scrutiny,  and  after  a  long  and 
intimate  acquaintance,  there  is  not  another  sin 
gle  thing  that  I  want  him  not  to  do.  Now,  dear, 
admit  yourself  that  I  have  made  a  pretty  narrow 
escape." 

A  laugh  met  Katherine's  quaint  defence,  but 
Mr.  Havilaiid  was  not  satisfied. 

"  Don't  be  fretted,  lovey ;  but  what  I  want  to 
see  is  that  Laballe  is  a  man  —  " 

"  Pap  must  not  call  names.     It  is  not  civil." 

"  Call  names  ?  " 

"  Certainly.  Pap  says  '  Laballe.'  Don't  say 
'  Laballe.'  It  sounds  hard  and  cold,  as  if  he 
were  only — anybody  —  and  not  Walter.  Wal 
ter,  Walter,  Walter,  —  is  it  not  a  lovely  name  ? 
Even  '  Mr.  Laballe '  sounds  more  as  if  he  were 
to  be  respected.  Won't  you  say  'Mr.  Laballe,' 
when  you  don't  feel  equal  to  saying  'Walter'?" 

"  Mr.  Laballe  —  Lord  Laballe  —  anything  you 
like." 

"  O,  I  like  that  amazingly !  Why,  gentle 
shepherd,  tell  me  why  I  was  not  born  in  marble 
halls,  and  christened  Lady  Katherine?  Instead 
of  Tishy  calling  after  me  '  Kath-er-rme,  you'll 
get  your  death  o'  cold ;  come  back,  and  put  on 
your  shawl ; '  it  would  be,  4  Will  your  ladyship 


56  FIRST  LOVE  IS  BEST. 

"  Says  he  is  waiting  for  a  summons  from  his 
partner,  I  suppose." 

"  Lays  it  all  to  me.  Says  he  should  have 
gone  to  town  a  month  ago  but  for  me.  Did  you 
ever  hear  the  like  of  that,  when  I  have  a  fresh 
surprise  every  day  at  seeing  him  ?  " 

"  But,  my  dear,  he  is  a  young  man,  and  with 
out  money,  and  he  has  made  no  real  start  in  life 
yet." 

"Yes,  dear,  I  know  he  is  poor.  He  has  no 
money.  That  is  the  only  point  on  which  we  are 
really  equal  —  " 

"  No,  Katherine,  you  are  not  equal  there.  It 
is  not  right  to  say  you  have  no  money.  You  are 
not  rich,  but  I  have  provided  for  your  comfort 
and  independence  as  long  as  you  live." 

"  That  you  have,  you  dear  old  daddy !  I  could 
not  be  a  happier  girl  if  you  had  earned  millions. 
So  I  can't  be  frightened  at  poverty,  or  be  wor 
ried  because  Walter  is  not  rich." 

"  Nor  I  either,  Katy.  It  is  not  poverty  I  am 
thinking  of,  though  you  know  nothing  about 
poverty,  and  I  hope  you  never  will.  But  the 
habits  that  prevent  poverty  are  the  thing." 

"  Habits  !  Walter's  habits  !  O,  my  dear, 
what  are  you  thinking  of?  " 

"  Of  you,  Katy.  Always  and  only  of  you, 
my  child." 

"  That  is  a  wicked  story,  now ;  for  I  know  you 
are  thinking  of  poor  Walter,  whose  habits  are 


A   SENTIMENTAL  SKETCH.  57 

perfect.  That  is,  he  does  smoke ;  I  wish  he  did 
not;  I  admit  I  wish  he  did  not.  But,  as  he  says, 
very  truly,  '  What  else  do  I  do  ?  Tolerate  this 
one  little  wickedness.'  And  I  confess,  papa,  that 
with  the  closest  scrutiny,  and  after  a  long  and 
intimate  acquaintance,  there  is  not  another  sin 
gle  thing  that  I  want  him  not  to  do.  Now,  dear, 
admit  yourself  that  I  have  made  a  pretty  narrow 
escape." 

A  laugh  met  Katherine's  quaint  defence,  but 
Mr.  Havilaiid  was  not  satisfied. 

"  Don't  be  fretted,  lovey ;  but  what  I  want  to 
see  is  that  Laballe  is  a  man  —  " 

"  Pap  must  not  call  names.     It  is  not  civil." 

"  Call  names  ?  " 

"  Certainly.  Pap  saj^s  '  Laballe.'  Don't  say 
*  Laballe.'  It  sounds  hard  and  cold,  as  if  he 
were  only — anybody  —  and  not  Walter.  Wal 
ter,  Walter,  Walter,  —  is  it  not  a  lovely  name  ? 
Even  '  Mr.  Laballe '  sounds  more  as  if  he  were 
to  be  respected.  Won't  you  say  '•Mr.  Laballe,' 
wThen  you  don't  feel  equal  to  saying  'Walter'?" 

"  Mr.  Laballe  —  Lord  Laballe  —  anything  you 
like." 

"  O,  I  like  that  amazingly !  Why,  gentle 
shepherd,  tell  me  why  I  was  not  born  in  marble 
halls,  and  christened  Lady  Katherine?  Instead 
of  Tishy  calling  after  me  '  Kath-er-rme,  you'll 
get  your  death  o'  cold ;  come  back,  and  put  on 
your  shawl ; '  it  would  be,  '  Will  your  ladyship 


58  FIRST  LOVE  IS  BEST. 

wrap  your  ladyship  in  your  ladyship's  diamond- 
dew  velvet,  or  in  your  ladyship's  sultana  shawl  ? ' 
What  does  your  ducal  highness  think  of  that?  " 

"  That  you  are  a  silly  chatterbox,  and  will 
stay  so  to  the  end,"  said  Mr.  Haviland,  with  a 
smile. 

"  Dear  old  duck ! "  cried  Kate,  encouraged. 
Then,  more  softly,  "Say  you  love  Walter." 

"  Love  Walter !  Bless  your  heart,  /  am  not 
going  to  marry  him.  Why  should  I  love  him  ?  " 

"  Because  I  —  I  care  for  him,  papa,  and  he 
cares  for  me." 

"  Yes,  dear,  he  is  very  fond  of  you.  I  am  not 
worried  about  that  — "  And  down  would  go 
Kate's  fingers,  over — not  to  say  into  —  his  eyes, 
with  a  shy,  laughing,  chiding,  "  What  business 
have  these  meddlesome  eyes  to  be  seeing  what 
does  not  belong  to  them  ?  " 

"  But,  Katy,  I  should  feel  easier  about  you  if 
I  could  see  him  showing  a  sense  of  responsibil 
ity, —  taking  hold  of  things  with  any  sort  of 
grip.  I  don't  see  that  he  is  up  and  astir.  In 
my  day,  we  used  to  call  it  dawdling." 

"  O,  papa  dear,"  cried  Kate,  shocked.  "  Just 
because  he  stays  a  week  or  two  into  September. 
That  is  not  fair.  That  is  not  like  you.  Why, 
he  is  studying  all  the  time." 

"But  his  business  is  in  Branch  &  Hale's 
law-office  in  town,  and  he  cannot  transact  it  fifty 
miles  away.  Besides,  he  is  seven-and-twenty, 


A   SENTIMENTAL  SKETCH.  59 

and  his  studying  ought  to  be  in  connection  with 
cases,  and  on  the  spot;  at  least,  so  it  seems 
to  me." 

"  And  it  is,  a  good  deal  of  the  time,  you  know, 
father.  It  is  only  just  now  —  just  this  little, 
lovely  fall,  that  he  takes  a  longer  vacation  than 
usual.  And  you  know,  dear,  you  must  go  shares 
with  me  in  being  to  blame  for  that.  But  this  is 
not  really  the  whole  reason.  I  assure  you,  Wal 
ter  has  thought  very  seriously  of  —  everything. 
And  many  things  which  he  seems  to  do  simply 
for  amusement,  from  self-indulgence,  he  does 
from  a  really  high  and  noble  motive.  You  see, 
papa,  I  have  talked  about  this  myself.  We  have 
talked  it  all  over.  Indeed,  we  talk  over  most 
things,"  added  Kate,  simply. 

"  And  what  is  the  high  and  noble  motive  here, 
Katy?" 

"  Don't  be  sarcastic,  there's  a  love  !  It  is  a 
dear  old  daddy  when  it  is  simple  and  docile ;  but 
when  it  is  sarcastic,  I  really  must  have  recourse 
to  discipline.  Promise?  Yes.  Well,  then, 
Walter  says  —  and  I  think  it  is  very  true,  and 
so  do  you  —  that  the  great  trouble  with  our 
country  is,  that  every  one  does  everything.  We 
are  eager  and  hurried.  We  are  not  restful. 
Now,  it  is  necessary  to  do  things,  but  it  is  just 
as  necessary  to  the  country's  dignity  to  have  a 
class  that  shall  not  be  over-eager  to  do,  but  that 
shall  be  tranquil  to  judge.  We  need  to  take 


60  FIRST  LOVE  IS  BEST. 

account  of  stock,  just  as  much  as  to  accumulate 
stock.  We  want  not  only  geniuses  to  make 
discoveries,  and  invent  machines,  and  write 
books,  but  we  want  a  cultivated,  discriminating, 
and  appreciative  people,  to  create  the  receptive 
atmosphere  that  stimulates  genius." 

"  So  Mr.  Laballe  is  going  to  act  the  part  of 
atmosphere  to  other  people's  genius." 

"  There,  you  are  at  it  again,  papa !  But  I  for 
give  you,  in  consideration  of  your  benighted 
ignorance.  No,  Mr.  Haviland,  Mr.  Laballe  is 
not  going  to  limit  himself  to  being  atmosphere. 
On  the  contrary,  I  shall  be  much  surprised  if  he 
does  not  before  long,  and  in  many  ways,  appear 
in  the  role  of  genius.  In  fact  I  think  he  has 
already  done  so.  But  don't  you  see,  dear,  that 
it  keeps  him  from  over-eagerness,  from  that 
fierce  restlessness  which  makes  life  such  a  hurry, 
such  a  race  and  a  wrestle,  and  precludes  all 
leisurely  and  rational  enjoyment  ?  Would  you 
not, — now,  papa,  tell  me  'honest,  true,'  —  would 
you  not  rather  live  with  —  people  who  are  quiet, 
and  take  pleasure  as  it  goes,  than  with  people 
who  are  in  a  frenzy  of  hurry  to  work  from 
morning  till  night  ?  " 

"  That  may  be,  lovey  ;  but  when  a  young  man 
has  his  fortune  to  make,  and  his  burdens  to  take 
from  other  people's  shoulders,  I  should  rather 
see  him  hurry  too  much  than  take  it  too  easy." 

"  I  don't  understand  you,  papa." 


A    SENTIMENTAL  SKETCH.  61 

"  Why,  dear,  for  instance  :  Laballe's  —  excuse 
me,  Mr,  Laballe's  mother  lives  with  her  brother, 
and  is  maintained  by  him.  Now,  if  I  were  a 
young  fellow,  with  two  hands  of  my  own,  I 
could  not  stand  that  for  a  day.  I  should  let 
atmospheres  slide,  and  look  out  for  my  mother. 
It  is  a  humiliation  for  a  woman  to  depend  upon 
her  brother  when  she  has  a  son." 

"I  —  do  —  not  know  anything  about  that," 
faltered  Katherine,  the  painful  blood  crimsoning 
her  cheeks ;  but  her  father  did  not  see  it.  It 
was  a  rude  transition,  that  must  be  admitted ; 
from  high  purposes  of  fashioning  your  life  on 
broad,  patriotic,  and  philosophic  principles,  down 
to  this  petty,  prudential,  domestic  arrangement. 

"  It  is  all  very  well,"  Mr.  Haviland  meandered 
on,  not  knowing  how  sharp  was  the  wound  he 
had  inflicted ;  "  it  is  all  well  enough  for  a  young 
man  to  think  how  he  would  like  to  live  if  things 
were  to  his  mind ;  but  it  is  another  thing  to  live 
in  that  way  when  things  are  not  to  his  mind.  I 
am  not  finding  fault,  Kitty,  but  I  can't  exactly 
like  the  lay  of  the  land.  Laballe  may  be  only 
thoughtless,  but  thoughtlessness  is  as  bad  in  its 
results  as  malice,  when  it  is  well  rooted  down. 
I  can't  trust  my  girl  gladly  to  any  one  who 
would  not  rather  be  rough-shod  and  honest,  than 
tiptoe  fine  and  make  somebody  else  pay  the  bills. 
Don't  be  blind,  Katherine.  Don't  be  too  sure." 

This  was  a  great  deal  for  Mr.  Haviland  to 


62  FIRST  LOVE  IS  BEST. 

say —  a  violent  opposition  for  him  to  set  up 
against  Kate.  Kate  felt  it,  but  she  could  not  go 
to  Walter  Laballe,  and  remark,  casually,  "Do 
you  come  here  and  set  up  for  a  leisure  class,  and 
talk  about  being  the  judgment-seat  before  which 
the  workers  are  to  present  themselves,  while  you 
allow  your  mother  —  you,  who  have  been  a 
grown  man  and  a  voter  for  six  years,  allow  your 
mother  to  be  dependent  upon  her  brother;  allow 
another  man  to  perform  the  duty  which  should 
be  your  highest  pleasure  ;  allow  her  to  be  subor 
dinate  to  one  on  whom  she  has  but  an  inferior 
claim,  instead  of  being  mistress  of  your  house, 
on  whom  she  has  the  supreme  claim?"  That, 
of  course,  would  be  a  lecture,  and  an  insult  to 
Walter.  Neither  could  Katy  go  to  work  clan 
destinely  to  find  out  something  against  her  Wal 
ter.  She  was  very  sure  that  the  case,  if  known, 
would  not  count  up  against  him.  She  was  sure 
that  in  some  way  unknown  to  common  observa 
tion  he  was  bearing  himself  as  became  a  son 
towards  his  mother.  If  she  had  had  doubts  of 
him  herself,  she  felt  that  she  could  speak  them 
boldly,  or  boldly  wait  the  issue.  But  she  only 
believed  that  some  one  had  given  her  father 
wrong  impressions,  —  he,  in  the  anxiety  of  his 
great  love  for  her,  being  naturally  open  to  wrong 
impressions.  She  wanted  to  be  able  to  convince 
her  father,  without  Walter's  suffering  the  dis 
tress  or  the  shame  of  being  aware  that  he  was 


A  SENTIMENTAL  SKETCH.  63 

misunderstood  by  her  own  father.  So  she  led 
him,  at  the  earliest  opportunity,  to  speak  of  his 
mother,  which  he  did  with  great  frankness  and 
great  affection, — to  Kate's  unbounded  delight. 

"She  must  miss  you  so  much,"  said  Katherine, 
when  a  niche  came  for  her  to  interpose  that  little 
remark.  "  It  is  such  a  pity  that  you  cannot  live 
together,  when  you  are  both  free." 

"  Only  that  the  dear  dame  is  so  much  happier 
with  Uncle  Ned  and  Aunt  Eva,  and  the  children, 
and  the  open  country  life,  than  she  could  be 
cooped  up  in  such  a  home  as  I  should  be  able 
to  give  her  in  the  city.  Katy,  I  have  one 
dream,  by  day  and  by  night  —  to  live  with  the 
two  women  that  I  love,  my  mother,  and  —  my 
wife." 

Of  course,  Katy  had  nothing  to  say  to  this,  and 
Walter  went  on,  —  "  to  give  them,  I  mean,  such 
a  home  as  is  worthy  of  them.  I  confess  it  would 
be  no  pleasure  to  me  to  see  them  restricted, 
hampered,  economizing,  —  bringing  all  their 
minds  to  bear  on  making  both  ends  meet.  None 
of  that  for  me,  if  you  please.  But  when  I  can 
see  them  dispensing  a  liberal  and  elegant  hospi 
tality,  living  in  the  state  that  befits  them, — 
'  Fly  swiftly  round,  ye  wheels  of  time  ! ' 

"  But,"  said  Kate,  running  the  risk  of  seeming 
to  argue  her  own  case  in  unmaidenly  fashion,  in 
her  eagerness  to  argue  the  mother's  case,  "  to  be 
with  you  is  the  main  thing,  after  all.  Your 


64  FIRST  LOVE  IS  BEST. 

mother  would  rather  be  with  you  in  ever  so 
small  a  house,  than  away  from  you  in  a  large 
one." 

"  Don't  be  too  sure  of  that,  Katy.  My  lady- 
mother  is  not  one  of  the  kind  that  takes  grace 
fully  to  poverty.  She  has  always  been  used  to 
wealth  and  she  becomes  wealth ;  and  I  would 
not  be  the  one  to  use  her  to  anything  else. 
Bless  my  soul,  Kate,  I  can't  think  of  anything 
more  comical  than  to  see  my  mother  pottering 
about  in  an  economical  way.  You  ought  to  see 
her." 

"  I  know  she  must  be  tall,  and  stately,  and 
handsome.  I  shall  be  afraid  of  her." 

"  She  is,  and  you  won't.  She  will  take  you 
straight  into  her  heart.  She  will  patronize  you 
a  little  at  first,  but  you  must  put  up  with  that. 
She  would  patronize  the  king  on  his  throne. 
When  she  enters  heaven  she  will  make  a  gra 
cious  courtesy  to  all  the  angels  standing  around, 
and  will  consider  in  her  heart  that  good  society 
there  has  received  a  valuable  accession." 

"  Then  I  should  like  to  know  why  I  am  not 
going  to  be  afraid  of  her." 

"  O,  she  is  very  amiable,  —  thoroughly  good- 
natured.  And  she  has  the  weakness  of  being  a 
devout  believer  in  your  humble  servant ;  so  if 
you  had  no  other  charm  for  her,  you  would  have 
the  charm  of  being  one  of  my  little  belongings, 
and  that  would  secure  her  allegiance  at  once." 


A  SENTIMENTAL  SKETCH.  65 

"  It  is  so  vexatious  that  she  should  not  be  able 
to  live  with  you,  when  she  loves  you  so." 

"Vexatious!  It  is  —  condemnable!  There 
never  was  anything  so  unreasonable  as  the  way 
things  are  divided  in  this  world.  There  is  old 
Glynn,  with  nobody  on  earth  to  care  for,  and 
not  a  thought  beyond  note-shaving,  leading  his 
dog-trot  life,  solid-stiff  with  mone}'  that  he  does 
not  know  how  to  dispose  of;  and  here  am  I,  with 
everything  under  heaven  to  bless  myself  with 
except  money.  I  declare,  Kate,  I  feel  some 
times  as  if  I  could  rob  a  bank.  If  Glynn  is 
found  some  morning  under  his  window,  bound, 
gagged,  and  plundered,  don't  you  report  this 
conversation,  will  you  ?  " 

Kate  did  not  quite  like  the  way  in  which  Mr. 
Glynn  was  mentioned,  but  she  could  not  say 
so,  and  the  blush  which  the  allusion  called  up 
passed  to  the  account  of  her  general  embar 
rassment.  But  altogether  the  talk  was  highly 
satisfactory  —  until  Kate  was  left  alone,  and 
began  to  think  over  how  she  should  present 
it  informally  to  her  father ;  and  then  she  grad 
ually  discovered  that  she  had  made  little  head 
way.  A  very  honest  regard  and  admiration  for 
his  mother  Mr.  Laballe  had  expressed,  but  the 
impertinent  little  fact  remained  that  she  was 
living  on  what  might  be  called  a  brother's 
charity  while  the  son  was  taking  life  easily  else 
where.  That  he  was  too  poor  to  support  his 
5 


66  FIRST  LOVE  IS  HEST. 

mother  as  lie  wished  did  not  at  all  mitigate  the 
fact  that  he  was  amusing  himself,  without  any 
very  strenuous  devotion  to  business,  and  doing  it 
on  the  ground  that  the  country  needed  a  class  of 
elegant,  learned,  and  leisurely  men,  to  encourage 
art,  science,  and  literature !  So,  on  the  whole, 
Katy  —  did  not  exactly  conclude  not  to  mention 
the  subject  to  her  father  again,  but  she  —  pon 
dered  it  in  her  heart  so  long,  that  the  time 
slipped  away  till  it  seemed  to  her  that  to  bring 
it  up  would  look  like  lugging  it  in,  and  as  if  it 
were  a  more  serious  matter  than  it  really  was. 
For  Katy  herself  was  not  in  doubt.  Walter  was 
all  right.  It  was  only  that  she  could  not  make 
the  thing  look  to  her  father  as  it  looked  to  her. 
But  she  pleased  herself  with  portraying  the  sly 
revenge  she  would  one  day  take  upon  him,  when 
Walter's  name  began  to  be  known ;  when  he 
should  be  sought,  both  in  his  avowed  and  in  his 
silent  profession;  when  the  lawyer  should  link 
his  name  with  great  causes,  and  the  critic  should 
adjudge  righteous  judgment.  She  heard  the 
vague  voices  saying,  "  At  last  a  good  time  has 
come  for  our  country.  We  have  a  man  who  has 
sought  greatness,  and  whom  also  greatness  has 
sought.  We  have  a  mind  keen  and  commanding 
in  its  own  pursuits,  but  so  liberally  cultured  that 
it  is  an  authority  in  the  pursuits  of  others :  a 
many-sided  man  ;  one  who,  of  his  own  will  and 
wisdom,  against  all  the  trend  of  his  time  and  his 


A   SENTIMENTAL  SKETCH.  67 

country,  has  attained  the  calm,  ripe,  judicial 
comprehension  which  has  hitherto  been  the  re 
sult  of  generations  of  liberal  leisure."  O,  Katy 
grew  eloquent  in  uttering  her  Walter's  praises, 
and  smiled  through  all  her  soul  at  the  thought 
of  her  father's  pleased  discomfiture.  She  in 
wardly  vowed  that  she  would  show  him  no 
mercy.  She  would  make  him  confess  to  within 
an  inch  of  his  life.  He  should  repeat  his  recan 
tation  aloud,  word  for  word,  at  her  dictation : 
"  I  was  wrong ;  mea  culpa.  Walter  Laballe's 
idleness  was  more  fruitful  of  the  best  results 
than  other  men's  labor."  And  then  she  would 
forgive  him  rapturously  and  they  would  pass 
the  rest  of  their  lives  in  a  state  of  mutual 
exultation  over  their  happiness  and  harmonious 
adoration  of  Walter. 

This  was  all  the  easier  a  picture  to  paint,  as 
Walter  presently  went  to  town.  It  would  be  a 
little  severe,  perhaps,  to  say  that  Katherine  felt 
relieved  by  his  going ;  and  yet  it  was  something 
like  relief  she  felt.  Indeed,  Walter  found  it  so 
hard  to  tear  himself  away,  and  Katherine  helped 
him  to  the  sacrifice  so  cheerfully,  without  giving 
him  the  least  excuse  by  encouragement  to  delay 
his  departure  a  day  beyond  the  specified  time, 
that  he  quite  scolded  her  for  her  hard-hearted- 
ness.  "  It  seems  to  me,  Miss  Haviland,"  he  re 
marked,  in  his  grandest  manner,  "that  }*ou  are 
altogether  too  resigned  to  a  separation." 


68  FIRST  LOVE  IS  BEST. 

"  Too  resigned  to  your  quickly  finding  your 
true  place  in  the  world  and  making  all  men  see 
you  as  I  see  you,"  said  Katy,  with  a  smiling  com 
posure,  a  proud  confidence,  that  could  but  flatter. 

"  To  think  ho\v  a  woman  will  sacrifice  love  to 
ambition,"  said  W alter,  essaying  a  futile  frown. 

"  How  a  woman  will  sacrifice  a  momentary 
enjoyment  to  the  life-long  ennobling  of  love, 
that  is  what  you  mean." 

"  But  I  must  remember,  Katy,  that  you  can 
only  love  in  your  own  measure.  Of  course,  a 
woman  can't  love  like  a  man.  Here  are  you 
holding  the  balance  as  prudently  and  accurately 
as  a  grocer's  apprentice,  and  coolly  setting  me 
adrift  for  the  mere  sake  of  getting  on  in  the 
world;  while  I — madman  that  I  am  —  am  ready 
to  cut  loose  from  everything  just  to  stay  in  your 
sight.  That  is  love,  Miss  Katy." 

"  Yes,"  said  Katy,  smiling  over  a  rose  into  the 
sunset  sky,  "  a  weak  love,  a  feeble  love,  that  may 
one  day  grow  to  stand  alone,  but  cannot  yet. 
Now  I  see  the  difference  between  a  man's  love 
and  a  woman's  love.  I  have  read  of  it  but 
never  before  perceived  it.  A  woman's  love  is 
all  strong,  full-statured  in  an  hour.  It  does  not 
need  to  be  nourished  and  strengthened  by  con 
stant  presence  and  association.  It  can  go  into 
the  wilderness,  and  live  alone,  and  grow  and 
flourish,  biding  its  time.  But  a  man  must  feed 
his  love  every  day  at  the  shrine  of  sight  and 


A   SENTIMENTAL  SKETCH.  69 

sound,  or  it  slips  away  from  him.  Poor  dear, 
poor  dear !  You  are  honest,  and  love  as  well  as 
you  can  in  your  feeble-forcible  way ; "  and  she 
gently  stroked  his  coat-sleeve  with  the  dainty 
rose  before  she  fastened  it  in  his  button-hole. 

I  am  not  sure  that  Katherine  was  not  happier 
after  Walter  went  away.  If  there  had  been  — 
mind,  I  do  not  say  there  was,  but  if  there  had  been 
• —  the  least  little  strain  of  dissatisfaction  or  even 
•^satisfaction  with  him,  suggested  by  her  father's 
doubts,  that  disappeared  wholly  and  Kate  had 
only  the  lover  of  her  fancies  to  worship.  Him  she 
could  endow  with  every  virtue  as  well  as  every 
grace  under  heaven.  And  to  him  she  wrote  letters 
of  such  length  as  must  try  any  but  a  lover's  pa 
tience —  letters  full  of  the  glory  of  youth  and  love 
and  unchecked  life,  plucking  from  earth,  and  sea, 
and  sky  wherewithal  to  minister  to  its  joy.  And 
Walter's  letters  in  return  were  charming.  All 
this  beautiful  romantic  world  was  not  lost  upon 
him  that  was  certain.  Kate  felt  that  if  one  half 
the  fire,  and  poetry,  and  eloquence  of  his  letters 
could  appear  at  the  bar  or  in  the  magazines  they 
would  set  the  world  aglow.  And  that  is  where 
they  will  one  day  appear,  said  Katy  to  herself, 
confidently. 

More  and  more  she  felt  that  day  drawing  on 
apace  as  Walter  spoke  from  time  to  time  of  the 
busy  occupation  in  which  he  was  engaged,  the 
many  calls  upon  his  time,  and  the  impossibility 


70  FIRST  LOVE  7S  BEST. 

of  answering  her  dear  letters  as  they  should 
be  answered.  To  all  of  which  Katy  listened 
delighted,  and  begged  him  not  to  think  she  cared 
more  for  his  letters  than  she  did  for  himself. 
She  was  not  set  up  for  a  stumbling-block  and  a 
rock  of  offence  to  him.  No,  indeed.  He  need 
not  answer  her  letters  at  all.  She  should  write 
and  write,  because  the  reading  would  cost  him  no 
mental  effort  —  alas!  interjected  Katy  archly  — 
but  he  need  not  even  read  them  till  it  was  quite 
convenient.  Perhaps  when  he  came  home  late 
and  tired  —  too  tired  to  deep,  it  would  soothe 
him,  would  lull  him  asleep  to  have  a  long,  pros 
ing  letter  of  hers  to  read  —  in  which,  dear  Wal 
ter,  there  is  nothing  at  all  of  the  least  conse 
quence,  nothing  new  or  exacting  or  that  cannot 
wait  —  only  one  thing  that  is  old  and  new,  and 
that  the  letter  is  full  of,  full,  full,  full,  and 
always  will  be,  only  you  cannot  guess  what  it  is, 
poor  little  dullard  that  you  are  and  know  noth 
ing  about  it.  So  every  morning  when  Kate  got 
a  letter  from  the  post-office  she  was  unspeaka 
bly  glad,  and  read  it  at  all  odd  hours,  and  even 
ones  too  —  and  went  home  across  the  fields 
that  she  might  read  it  unobserved  without  wait 
ing  to  be  at  home  ;  went  into  her  own  room  as 
soon  as  she  was  at  home  that  she  might  really 
read  it  at  her  leisure  ;  remembered  all  through 
lunch  that  something  delicious  was  coming  after 
lunch,  viz.,  reading  Walter's  letter ;  and  "  read- 


A   SENTIMENTAL  SKETCH.  71 

ing  Walter's  letter,"  meant  reading  it  about  six 
times  every  time.  And  when  Katy  got  no  letter 
from  the  post-office  she  was  glad  too,  and  walked 
blithely  home,  dreaming  of  Walter's  eager,  active 
life  and  quick-coming  success,  and  pleasing  her 
self  with  reflecting  that  no  one  but  herself  knew 
what  efforts  he  was  bringing  to  the  fight  because 
no  one  but  herself  knew  how  much  rather  he 
would  be  writing  to  her  than  poring  over  pon 
derous  law-books  or  attending  in  dingy  court 
rooms.  "  I  do  have  some  influence  over  him," 
smiled  Katy  to  herself.  "  I  make  him  work, 
poor  dear.  But  I  will  reward  him."  So  Katy 
was  glad  and  happy  well-nigh  all  the  time. 

Only  when  Mr.  Glynn  obtruded  into  her 
thoughts.  He  was  not,  indeed,  the  ideal  of  a 
despairing  lover  any  more  than  he  had  been  the 
ideal  of  a  successful  one.  In  fact,  the  casual 
observer  might  think  he  was  a  little  stolid  in 
both  characters.  He  never  was  very  finical  in 
dress,  but  he  dressed  neither  more  nor  less  care 
lessly  than  before.  He  went  to  town  every  day, 
and  he  drove  his  horses  and  his  ponies  —  though 
never  drove  Katy  behind  them  again.  He  came 
to  Mr.  Haviland's  oftener  after  Walter  had  left 
them  than  before,  and  he  was  always  sufficiently 
cheerful,  and  always  kind  and  friendly.  But 
Katy,  whose  eyes  experience  had  sharpened, 
noted  often  a  wistfulness  that  none  other  saw,  and 
felt  —  it  really  seemed  to  her  that  she  felt  in  her- 


72  FIRST  LOVE  IS  BEST. 

self  the  loneliness  which  must  have  been  his,  not 
hers  —  she  was  so  utterly  happy  that  she  experi 
enced  a  profound  pity  for  him.  She  never 
thought  of  such  a  thing  as  that  time  should  have 
the  least  effect  in  softening  his  disappointment. 
She  was  too  loyal  a  lover  herself  to  think  that 
even  failure  could  conquer  love.  She  tried  to 
imagine  how  she  should  feel  if  Walter  did  not 
care  for  her ;  but  that  was  such  an  evil  case  as 
she  shuddered  to  contemplate,  and  such  an 
impossible  case,  that  even  her  imagination  could 
not  take  it  in.  So  she  fell  back  on  the  rather 
cold  comfort,  that  things  did  happen,  and  you 
could  not  help  it.  And  in  the  next  world  she 
thought  Mr.  Glynn  would  recognize  his  mistake, 
and  see  clearly  that  it  was  not  she  who  was 
appointed  to  him  but  some  other  angel.  But  it 
seemed  to  her  a  very  cheerless  and  forlorn  way 
along  which  he  must  go  through  the  world  to 
meet  that  angel,  and  she  was  heavenly-kind  to 
the  poor  man  ;  and  he  saw  through  it,  and  smiled 
upon  her  pleasantly,  and  bantered  her  about  the 
looking-glass,  which  she  fully  believed  the  moon- 
men  had  set  up  as  a  signal  to  us  earth-folk,  and 
ground  the  gravel  of  his  garden-walks  under 
foot  half  the  night,  wild  with  despair  at  what  he 
was  losing  and  another  man  was  gaining. 


V. 

~I7"IND  Heaven,  that  does  sometimes  find  it 
J\.  moral  to  give  people  just  what  they  want, 
permitted  Katherine's  only  aunt,  about  this  time, 
to  remove  from  the  rural  city  of  her  long  resi 
dence  to  the  great  city  where  Mr.  Laballe  was 
making  his  furious  fight  for  fame  and  Kate.  And 

o  o 

the  letter  announcing  the  change,  announced  also 
to  Kate  that  her  annual  visit  this  winter  would 
be  an  altogether  more  brilliant  and  stirring  affair 
than  the  tame  little  tea-drinkings  and  juvenile 
junketings  which  had  hitherto  characterized 
Kate's  visit, — a  change  proper  both  to  the  en 
larged  sphere  of  operations  and  to  the  dignity  of 
the  visitor,  who  had  now  become  a  full-fledged 
young  lady. 

{Catherine,  ever  devout,  felt  that  now  she  was 
placed  under  perpetual  bonds  to  be  good,  since 
Providence  had  specially  interposed  to  give  her 
this  opportunity  to  be  near  Walter.  For  that 
was  what  it  all  meant  to  Katy.  Her  aunt  was 
highly  respectable,  in  easy  circumstances,  and 

.7.3 


74  FIRST  LOVE  IS  BEST. 

sufficiently  well  known  to  give  Kate  immediate 
access  to  good  company  and  agreeable  entertain 
ment.  And  is  not  the  city  always  a  great,  mys 
terious,  fairy  palace  to  the  young  country-girl, 
full  of  beauty  and  activity  and  promise  of  unim- 
agined  pleasure  ?  But  though  Katherine  loved  all 
this  with  the  love  natural  to  her  youth,  the  one 
absorbing  interest  which  the  city  had  for  her  now 
was  that  it  was  the  theatre  of  Walter's  life,  the 
field  of  his  knightly  contest.  Here  he  was  lay 
ing  broad  and  deep  the  foundations  of  greatness. 
And,  to  do  Katy  justice,  it  was  not  the  plaudits 
of  the  multitude  that  pleased  her  most,  but  the 
underlying  fact  which  those  plaudits  should  cer 
tify,  and  chiefly,  good  girl,  to  her  father's  heart. 
She  would  have  been  more  disdainful  of  a  false 
renown,  of  a  catchpenny  reputation,  than  of  utter 
obscurity.  If,  she  said  to  herself,  if  Walter  worked 
for  fame  simply  for  fame's  sake,  he  would  not  be 
Walter  at  all.  Underneath  was  the  strong,  solid 
substance,  only  partially  manifest  as  yet,  known 
in  its  real  possibility  only  to  her.  Acknowledg 
ment  she  wanted,  for  without  that  could  not 
come  the  power  to  help  and  heal  the  world's 
hurts.  And  now  she  was  going  up  to  see  Walter 
no  longer  first  and  foremost  in  holiday  amuse 
ment,  no  longer  at  her  beck  and  call,  but  stead 
fastly  treading  the  vague,  mysterious  road  along 
which  men  pass  to  achievement  and  victory.  I 
shall  not  know  him,  mused  Katy.  I  must  make 


A   SENTIMENTAL  SKETCH.  75 

up  iny  mind  not  to  see  him  much.  He  will  be 
there  to  meet  me.  He  will  come  sometimes  in 
the  evenings,  but  I  shall  know  he  is  near  me.  I 
shall  be  in  the  same  town  with  him  and  I  shall 
always  be  thinking  he  may  come  in  any  moment, 
if  it  is  only  for  a  moment.  And  I  wonder  if  he 
will  be  very  far  away.  I  shall,  perhaps  I  shall, 
just  possibly,  hear  people  speak  of  him,  but  I  sup 
pose  not  yet.  I  suppose  it  is  too  soon  for  him  to  be 
known.  But  if  I  should  chance  to  overhear  his 
name,  perhaps  as  a  rising  young  lawyer,  or  as  a 
clever  young  author,  how  shall  I  ever  keep  my 
face  ?  And  even  in  vestal  solitude,  Katy  began  a 
series  of  furious  anticipatory  blushes,  and  laughed 
at  herself  silently  for  a  silly,  silly,  good-for-noth 
ing  girl. 

Time  lagged  and  lagged,  and  ran  with  light 
ning  swiftness,  and  the  winter  days  came,  and 
the  one  day  of  days  that  never  would  come,  but 
came,  and  bore  her  to  the  city  and  to  Walter. 
And  Walter  was  there  at  the  station,  in  the 
coach,  at  her  aunt's,  and  Kate  had  no  difficulty 
in  knowing  him  —  the  same  Walter,  dark  and 
devoted,  handsome  and  gay,  strong  and  smiling. 
"  Indeed,"  said  Katy,  "  winter  and  summer  are 
alike  to  you.  You  will  not  need  go  into  the 
country  to  recover  health  next  summer !  " 

"  No,  Kitty,  it  is  something  else  than  health  I 
shall  go  into  the  country  for  —  something  that 
has  come  into  the  city  for  me  !  " 


76  FIRST  LOVE  IS  BEST. 

"  Sanciness !  I  came  to  see  my  aunt !  " 

"  O  !  yes.  That  is  what  I  called  for  to-night. 
My  aunt,  solely.  To-morrow,  perhaps,  I  may 
come  to  see  you,  and  take  you  to  see  the  city ; 
or  will  you  be  too  tired  ?  Perhaps  you  would 
better  stay  quietly  at  home  to-morrow,  and  I  will 
look  in  upon  you.  I  think  I  ought  to  be  show 
enough  for  one  day." 

"  O  !  but,  Walter,  you  must  not  mind  me. 
You  must  not  think  I  have  come  to  take  up 
your  time.  Aunt  Fanny  will  look  after  me,  and 
anything  and  everything  will  be  interesting  to 
me.  Don't  think  of  me  ever  in  the  day-time, 
then  in  the  evenings  I  shall  enjoy  you  with  a 
clear  conscience." 

"  And  pray,  Miss,  what  is  there  so  reprehensi 
ble  about  me  that  I  am  to  be  so  summarily  dis 
missed  in  the  day-time,  and  allowed  only  to  stalk 
forth  from  my  lair  at  night?  " 

"O,  Walter,"  laughed  Kitty,  "I  was  only 
thinking  of  you." 

"  So  I  suppose.  What  I  wish  to  know  is, 
what  crime  you  have  been  so  good  as  to  fasten 
on  me  that  shall  keep  me  hid  by  day." 

"  Absurd !  You  know  just  as  well  as  I  what 
I  mean  :  that  I  don't  wish  to  be,  and  will  not  be, 
a  drag  on  you  ;  and  that  you  are  not  to  think  for 
a  moment  that  I  am  exacting  your  leisure  or  your 
time.  Now  understand  me,  Walter  dear.  Don't 
even  in  jest  pretend  you  don't." 


A   SENTIMENTAL  SKETCH.  77 

"  But  you  don't  mean,  Kitty,  that  I  am  to  dig 
and  delve  all  the  time  you  are  here  and  leave 
you  by  yourself." 

"  I  thought,"  said  Katherine,  faltering  a  little, 
"  you  would  be  busy  all  the  days,  just  as  if  I 
were  not  here,  but  that  in  the  evenings,  if  you 
were  not  too  tired,  and  —  Sundays  —  and  perhaps 
some  other  times,  I  should  see  you,  when  you  are 
not  too  tired." 

"Tired!  Nonsense!  I  am  never  tired  —  of 
seeing  you,  at  any  rate.  And  as  for  business, 
Missy,  you  let  that  alone.  You  are  my  business 
now  and  I  mean  to  transact  you  thoroughly.  I 
suppose  you  know  that  you  have  already  three 
invitations.  I  hope  you  have  come  in  fighting 
cut." 

"  Fighting  cut !  what  is  that?  " 

"  O,  plenty  of  flimsy  gowns  to  look  like  a  cloud 
in  the  evening,  and  shiny  gowns  to  look  a  sun  in 
the  morning,  with  all  the  wampum  thereunto  ap 
pertaining." 

"  I  have  not  a  great  many  gowns  flimsy  or 
shiny  ;  but  I  dare  say  I  shall  do  very  well.  I 
shall  depend  upon  Aunt  Fanny  to  see  that  I  am 
strictly  orthodox  in  the  matter  of  dress." 

"  I  don't  know  whether  that  is  quite  safe, 
Kitty.  Aunt  Fanny  is  nice,  but  she  is,  begging 
your  pardon  and  hers,  rather  verging  on  the 
heavy  composite  order.  You  must  look  light, 
and  airy,  and  youthful.  Now  don't  let  her  make 


78  FIRST  LOVE  IS  BEST. 

you  up  stiff  and  poky.  I  hope  you  have  brought 
fluffy-up  dresses,  haven't  you  ;  such  as  they  would 
call  you  crazy  to  wear  at  home  —  and  in  mid 
winter  ?  " 

"  I  have  a  blue  flannel  wrapper,  very  soft,  and 
light,  and  warm,"  said  Kate,  mischievously ;  "  but 
I  shall  not  wear  that  on  week-days.  That  I  shall 
keep  for  Sundays." 

"  O,  the  vixen  !  But  what  will  you  wear  to 
morrow  night  ?  " 

"  A  gown,  I  think,  dear  ;  I  am  resolved  I  will 
not  wear  my  water-proof." 

"  Now,  Katy,  if  you  are  going  to  develop  into 
a  quiz  it  is  all  up  with  me.  Be  civil  to  a  fel 
low,  there's  a  dear  !  You  think  this  is  all  non 
sense,  but  I  tell  you  honestly  that  I  am  very 
proud  of  you  and  I  want  to  be  sure  you  don't 
make  any  mistake.  It  is  folly  to  say  that  dress 
is  insignificant.  Dress  makes  all  the  difference 
in  the  world.  You  are  twice  as  pretty  and  four 
times  as  sensible  as  anybody  else  here.  If  you 
lived  in  town  you  would  lead  society  before  it 
could  say  Jack  Robinson ;  and  your  taste  Avould 
be  perfect.  But  you  have  had  no  chance  down 
in  the  country.  That  is  why  I  wrote  to  you  not 
to  make  any  preparations  but  buy  your  outfit 
here.  Then  you  would  be  sure  of  the  style  and 
look  like  other  people." 

"  Don't  I  now  ?  "   said  Kate,  quietly. 

"  My  darling,  yes  ;  only  no  one  else  looks  so 


A    SENTIMENTAL  SKETCH.  79 

fresh  and  nice  as  you.  But  these  day-time  frocks 
can  be  seen  of  men  and  women  everywhere.  A 
rustic  dressmaker  could  copy  those  and  we 
should  be  sure  of  her.  But  how  could  she  have 
a  notion  of  an  evening  costume  when  she  never 
saw  one  in  her  life  ?  " 

"  O,  I  could  give  it  to  her." 

"  Why,  you  —  " 

"  Are  not  much  better !  you  were  going  to 
say." 

u  O,  if  you  have  been  giving  your  mind  to  it 
no  doubt  it  will  be  all  right.  Still,  I  think  you 
had  better  have  acted  on  my  suggestion,  and  put 
yourself  into  the  hands  of  a  regular  modiste." 

"  O,"  said  Kate,  carelessly,  "  Miss  Brimmer 
and  I  are  very  clever,  and  you  will  find  that  I 
shall  pass  without  special  rebuke.  But  since  you 
asked,  I  will  tell  you  that  my  dress  is  not  very 
cloudy,  but  quite  appropriate  to  the  weather  and 
—  me,  warm,  woolly,  and  comfortable." 

Walter  shrugged  his  shoulders,  and  gave  a 
faint  laugh.  He  was  not  pleased,  but  Kate  was 
impracticable,  and  he  had  to  make  the  best  of  it. 
To  help  him  out,  came  a  little  uncertainty  as  to 
whether  she  was  teasing  him  or  really  unversed 
in  gala-dress.  "  One  thing  I  will  do  nolens  vo- 
lens,"  he  muttered,  playfully  resolute,  fingering 
her  little  vinaigrette,  "douse  you  with  German 
cologne.  You  shall  not  smell  this  vile  American 
stuff." 


80  FIRST  LOVE   IS  BEST. 

"How  do  you  know  it  is  American  ?"  asked 
Kate. 

"  What  else  did  I  grow  a  nose  for  ?  " 
"  Why  is  not  American  as  good  as  German  ?  '' 
"  Why  is  not  a  pinchbeck  dollar  as  good  as  a 
gold  one  ?  " 

"  What  is  the  chief  end  of  man  ?  " 
"  Man's  chief  end  is  to  make  a  fool  of  himself 
for  a  woman,  and  be  snubbed  for  his  pains  ;  "  and 
so  Walter  laughed  her  into  good  humor  again. 

Nevertheless  Kate  was  uncomfortable,  not  to 
say  angry,  though  it  was  so  strange  and  unex 
pected  a  thing  to  be  angry,  and  with  Walter,  that 
she  hardly  knew  what  to  make  of  it  herself.  She 
resented  his  lack  of  confidence  in  her  taste.  I 
don't  say  that  this  was  reasonable  in  her.  In 
point  of  logic  I  think  it  was  rather  unreasonable. 
Walter  was  right.  Katy  was  a  country  girl,  and 
naturally  would  not  know  what  was  appropriate 
to  a  society  with  which  she  was  unfamiliar,  and 
she  ought  to  have  considered  it  very  kind  and 
helpful  in  Walter  to  take  thought  for  her  rai 
ment,  about  which,  also,  it  would  have  been 
more  amiable  that  she  herself  should  have  some 
misgivings.  Perhaps  she  had ;  but  she  was  not 
for  that  to  permit  Walter  to  have  any.  In  fact, 
she  was  not  pleased  that  the  matter  should  have 
occurred  to  him  at  all.  She  thought  of  Walter, 
not  of  his  clothes,  and  she  was  vexed  to  find  that 
he  was  not  equally  absorbed  in  her.  She  had 


A   SENTIMENTAL   SKETCH.  81 

prepared  herself  to  encounter  a  rival  in  his  law- 
books  and  briefs.  She  had  reconciled  her  heart 
beforehand  to  being  put  off  by  business  and 
study.  But  she  did  expect  his  moments  of  leis 
ure,  his  evening  hours,  to  be  preoccupied  with 
herself;  and  she  was  doubly  disappointed  that 
not  only  did  he  seem  to  have  as  much  control  of 
his  time  and  as  much  familiarity  with  all  sorts 
of  amusement  here  as  in  the  country,  but  also 
that  he  was  not  so  absorbed  in  the  pleasure  of 
being  with  her  that  he  could  not  take  thought 
for  what  she  should  put  on,  and  feel  that  it 
was  necessary  to  take  thought,  or  she  would  not 
put  on  the  right  thing  !  And  she  did  not  like  a 
man  to  think  about  such  things.  It  was  a 
man's  business  to  wonder,  love  and  praise  her 
dress,  but  not  to  know  anything  about  it.  She 
had  really  spared  no  pains  with  her  wardrobe. 
She  had  studied  the  fashion-plates  and  such  shop- 
windows  as  she  could  command,  and  had  held 
sweet  counsel  with  a  dressmaker  imported  from 
the  neighboring  town,  and  had  no  one  but  Wal 
ter  in  mind  all  the  time.  Would  he  like  this  ? 
Would  that  suit  him  ?  She  had  not  once  dreamed 
of  what  society  would  think  or  say  of  her,  or 
that  it  would  say  anything ;  but  she  had  a  very 
earnest,  honest  wish  to  be  lovely  and  pleasing  in 
his  eyes.  While  a  gown  was  under  her  hands, 
her  cheeks  grew  warm  and  her  heart  beat  fast 
with  thinking  that  when  she  put  it  on  Walter 
6 


82  FIRST  LOVE  IS  BEST. 

would  be  awaiting  her ;  she  should  go  down 
stairs  half  ashamed,  yet  half  expectant  to  re 
ceive  his  glad  greeting,  and  enjoy  his  wonder 
ing,  surprised  glance  over  her  unwonted  finery, 
and  the  somewhat  stupid  compliments  which  she 
should  pardon  to  the  love  that  pointed  them. 
But  she  meant  to  make  him  look  at  the  bows 
that  her  own  hands  made,  and  the  folds  she 
draped,  and  the  flowers  she  grouped,  and  he 
would  not  half  see  them,  but  would  say  he  did 
—  and  —  and  —  now  he  was  asking  her  before 
hand  what  she  was  going  to  wear,  and  his  eyes 
would  be  critical,  and  somehow  suddenly  all 
pleasure  in  her  dress  was  gone,  and  what  made 
him  care  about  such  things  ?  The  idea  of  a  man 
knowing  one  kind  of  cologne  from  another ! 
What  business  had  a  man  to  know  there  was 
such  a  thing  as  cologne  ?  It  was  not  knightly. 
She  wanted  a  grand  scorn,  rather  a  sublime 
ignorance,  of  such  propria  quce  feminis  !  And 
poor  Katy  cried  herself  to  sleep  that  night  and 
did  not  know  exactly  why. 

But  things  looked  brighter  next  day.  Walter 
came  and  never  mentioned  dress,  but  was  light- 
hearted  and  glad  to  be  with  her,  and  yet  had  to 
go  away  early  to  meet  his  partner,  and  could  not 
see  her  again  till  he  came  to  join  her  and  her 
aunt  for  the  evening.  And  Katy  put  on  her 
evening  gown  with  greater  tranquillity  than 
she  had  supposed  would  be  possible.  It  was  a 


A  SENTIMENTAL  SKETCH.  83 

very  pretty  gown  too.  Walter  might  have 
spared  himself  the  trouble  of  being  anxious. 
White,  soft,  clinging  stuff,  lightened  up  with 
silk,  and  poetized  with  lace,  and  brightened 
with  such  floriculture  as  girls  love  and  adorn  — 
not  at  all  dazzling  the  ball-room  vision,  but  very 
restful  and  pleasing  to  eyes  that  chanced  to  fall 
upon  it,  and  chiefly  to  those  that  love  it ;  and 
Walter  was  pleased,  too.  He  was  forced  to 
admit  that  it  was  very  soft  and  graceful  and 
becoming  —  "  though  I  still  maintain  I  was 

o  o 

right,"  he  added,  after  admitting  he  was  wrong. 
"  I  would  have  chosen  differently  —  something 
that  would  have  fluffed  out  like  waves  of  surf 
all  around  —  looked  all  filmy  and  glittering  and 
splendid." 

"  But  it  can't  be  filmy  and  glittering  at  the 
same  time,"  said  Kate,  not  so  much  discomposed 
by  his  qualified  praise,  nor  so  much  heartened 
by  his  cordial  admiration,  as  she  would  have  im 
agined. 

If  Kate  had  gone  to  this  her  first  state  party 
with  her  heart  disengaged,  she  would  probably 
have  been  a  little  more  excited  or  agitated  than 
she  was  ;  yet,  perhaps,  not  much.  For  Kate 
had  an  intimate  acquaintance  with,  and  a  great 
reverence  for,  certain  persons  in  the  best  society, 
which  somehow  fortified  her  against  feeling  any 
uncomfortable  bashfulness  towards  persons  of 
inferior  claims.  Lord  Macaulay,  and  Lord  Byron, 


84  FIRST  LOVE  IS  BEST. 

and  Mr.  Dan  Chaucer,  and  Mr.  Whittier,  and  Sir 
Walter  Scott,  and  Mrs.  Oliphant,  and  Mrs.  Stowe, 
and  Charlotte  Bronte  were  habitues  of  Kate's  so 
ciety,  and  she  would  have  gone  to  meet  them 
with  eagerness  and  delight  not  unmingled  with 
trepidation.  But  she  had  all  the  arrogance,  ex- 
actingness,  and  severity  of  youth.  Except  where 
she  was  swayed  by  personal  likings,  except  that 
she  was  loyal  to  love,  and  blood,  and -to  the 
duties  and  sympathies  actually  near  her,  she  had 
small  respect  for  abstract  goodness  unallied  with 
distinction.  The  dull,  honest  ways  of  dull,  hon 
est  men,  the  homely  virtues  of  self-sacrifice  and 
self-denial  in  ordinary  mothers  and  wives,  the 
shallow  sentiment  and  affection  of  good,  shallow 
girls,  commanded  little  respect  and  no  reverence 
in  Kate.  No  amount  of  wealth  awed  her.  On 
the  contrary,  she  did  not  give  it  its  due,  either 
in  respect  of  what  it  implied  or  what  it  could 
accomplish.  She  did  not  credit  to  the  rich  the 
sagacity  and  prudence  which  most  often  amass 
wealth,  nor  that  catholic  culture  which  wealth  so 
largely  insures.  She  had  a  very  unusual,  almost 
an  unnatural  indifference  to  style  and  fashion. 
Brought  up  in  a  community  where  fashion  was 
a  staid  and  slow-paced  thing,  moving  according 
to  fixed  laws  and  not  eager  for  change,  she  had 
little  knowledge,  and  therefore  little  awe  of  a 
community  where  fashion  is  strenuous,  versatile, 
and  imperious.  So  Katy  always  wondered  at 


A  SENTIMENTAL  SKETCH.  85 

flurries  over  an  incursion  into  an  assembly. 
Why,  what  of  it  ?  was  Katy's  mode  of  reason 
ing.  There  is  no  one  in  particular  who  has 
done  anything.  Some  are  rich  and  some  are 
not,  but  nobody's  opinion  of  me  is  worth  more 
than  mine  of  him.  (The  audacious  little  minx!) 
Most  of  us  might  as  well  have  been  some  one 
else  as  ourselves.  If  Mr.  Brown  had  never  been 
born,  Mr.  Smith  would  have  answered  every  pur 
pose.  Other  people  would  have  sold  sugar,  and 
made  shoes,  and  preached  sermons,  and  worn 
silk  gowns  if  these  people  had  not.  Why  should 
I  be  afraid  of  them  ?  But  Mrs.  Stowe,  now  ! 
There  is  but  one  woman  in  all  the  world  who 
ever  wrote  Uncle  Tom's  Cabin,  and  if  it  had  not 
been  for  her,  America  would  never  have  had  a  wo 
man  who  could  write  a  book  that  should  be  trans 
lated  into  all  languages  and  set  the  whole  world 
astir.  If  I  were  going  to  meet  Mrs.  Stowe,  — 
well,  I  don't  suppose  I  should  be  able  to  help 
trembling,  I  should  be  so  full  of  excitement. 
But  five  hundred  people  in  a  city  are  only  four 
hundred  and  fifty  more  than  fifty  people  in  the 
country,  —  and  silks  and  laces  are  the  same  kind 
of  things  as  cashmere  and  cambric.  Thus  rea 
soned  Katy  more  or  less  as  occasion  required.  If 
she  had  been  differently  brought  up  and  a  great 
deal  wiser,  she  would  probably  have  had  more 
respect  for  the  elaborations  of  society,  technically 
so  called ;  but  as  it  was,  she  was  utterly  sincere, 


86  FIRST  LOVE  IS  BEST. 

and  so  escaped  being  disagreeable  about  it  as  she 
could  not  have  done  had  her  opinion  been  what 
such  opinion  often  is  —  the  mere  echo,  simula 
tion,  and  cant  of  simplicity. 

Wherefore  Kate  went  to  her  first  city  party, 
and  was  not  bewildered.  Also  she  was  stimu 
lated  by  a  lingering  resentment  which  made  her 
resolute  to  show  Walter  that  she  could  sustain 
herself — that  she  could  be  trusted  in  dress  and 
demeanor,  as  well  as  in  life  and  death.  And  she 
succeeded  very  respectabty.  It  is  true  she  did 
not  occasion  a  general  buzz  of  inquiry,  nor  the 
general  stare  of  admiration  which  the  entrance 
of  the  novelist's  heroine  and  beauty  into  a  ball 
room  causes ;  and,  in  fact,  I  never  saw  any  one 
who  did  !  A  woman  may  be  never  so  beautiful, 
but  the  evening  light  and  the  evening  dress  cast 
an  illusion  over  the  most  ugly  ;  and  moreover 
the  guests  are  standing  in  all  corners,  and  look 
ing  in  all  directions,  and  talking  in  all  keys,  and 
walking  in  all  corridors,  and  there  is  not  unity 
enough  in  the  crowd  to  produce  a  common  sensa 
tion,  or  even  to  see  the  beauty  when  she  comes 
sweeping  in.  No,  Katy  did  nothing  of  the  sort, 
and  probably  would  have  made  no  world-wide 
impression,  even  had  the  wide  world  been  gazing 
at  her.  But  she  was  straight  and  lithe,  healthy 
and  self-possessed,  less  self-conscious  than  if  she 
had  been  thinking  less  about  herself.  She  danced 
two  or  three  times,  and  could  have  danced  more 


A   SENTIMENTAL  SKETCH.  87 

had  she  chosen,  but  she  preferred  not.  She  saw 
some  friends  of  her  aunt,  but  she  was  not  re 
quired  to  say  much  to  them,  and  she  did  not  say 
much.  When  W alter  brought  up  his  friends  she 
was  more  on  the  alert.  Some  girls  were  dressed 
more  handsomely,  more  richly,  more  showily 
than  herself,  but  many  were  dressed  as  plainly, 
and  some  less  becomingly.  Some  were  lively 
and  chatty,  and  some  had  scarcely  a  word  to 
say  for  themselves.  Walter's  male  friends  were 
mostly  young  men,  and  those  who  were  not  she 
did  not  particularly  affect.  In  fact  Katy  was  so 
young  herself  that  she  did  not  care  much  for 
young  men.  For  one  young  man  she  had  great 
regard,  but  for  the  rest  she  loved  to  smite  her 
strong  stubborn  young  convictions  against  the 
experience  of  old  men  ;  she  loved  to  sun  herself 
in  the  mellow  wisdom  of  ripened  years.  She,  all 
whose  eager  life  lay  in  the  future,  would  fain 
add  to  her  pleasure  the  joy  of  retrospect,  and 
that  she  could  only  do  by  sympathy  and  contact 
with  those  whose  lives  lay  serenely  behind  them. 
And  when  Fate  brought  her  that  evening  a  col 
lege  president,  who  was  a  little  gray  and  a  little 
bald,  and  the  least  little  in  the  world  profes 
sional,  she  rose  with  a  bound  to  the  situation 
and  tasted  solid  happiness.  It  was  such  a  mo 
ment  of  triumph  as  she  had  never  expected  — 
least  of  all  in  this  visit,  least  of  all  at  an  evening 
party.  Fortunately  for  Katy,  her  eye  did  not 


88  FIRST  LOVE  IS  BEST. 

disappoint  her  hope.  He  was  a  very  jewel  of 
a  college  president,  at  least  for  her  purpose.  He 
had  not  only  at  his  tongue's  end  all  the  learning 
of  the  schools,  but  he  had  travelled  far  and  wide, 
and  quite  off  the  usual  tracks  of  travel,  so  that 
he  had  stores  of  information  not  to  be  found  in 
books ;  and  he  was  withal,  though  somewhat 
grave,  or  otherwise  Kate  would  have  been  griev 
ously  disappointed,  also  with  a  keen  sense  of  hu 
mor,  and  with  a  mind  still  not  only  active,  but 
alert  and  impressible.  And  while  Kate  instantly 
fell  down  and  worshipped  him  with  intellectual 
adoration,  he  too  was  won  by  her  bright,  rapt, 
sympathetic  listening ;  he  questioned  her  with 
a  half  amused,  half  tender,  but  altogether  pleas 
ing  and  stimulating  curiosity  ;  he  talked  to  her 
with  a  flattering  accuracy  and  minuteness  ;  he 
talked  to  her,  in  short,  as  if  he  considered  her 
worth  while,  and  as  if  he  were  himself  inter 
ested  ;  and  when  it  was  time  to  go  home,  Kate 
was  found  by  Walter,  brilliant,  animated,  in  a 
seventh  heaven  of  delight.  Nay,  so  mysterious 
are  the  ways  of  Providence  that  I  doubt  not  the 
learned  president  enjoyed  the  little  rencontre 
with  almost  equal  zest,  though  he  was  mature, 
and  wise,  and  learned,  while  Katherine  was  alto 
gether  ignorant,  crude,  and  positive.  But  a 
bright,  fresh,  happy  young  woman  has  got  to 
be  very  objectionable  indeed  in  order  to  make 
herself  disagreeable  to  an  intelligent  elderly 


A   SENTIMENTAL  SKETCH.  89 

gentleman  who  is  the  object  of  her  admiration 
and  reverence. 

"  Did  you  see  anything  to  discourage  you  in 
the  way  of  dress  ?  "  said  Mrs.  Ford  to  Katy,  as 
they  were  performing  that  imperative  and  final 
duty  of  "  talking  it  over." 

"  Discourage  me  ?  No,  unless  I  had  to  make 
it,  and  then  I  should  be  discouraged  at  the  out 
set." 

"  Nor  did  I.  Bella  Stacy  was  all  train,  with 
her  waist  crowded  down  into  sixteen  inches  !  " 

"  So,"  said  Walter,  emphatically,  "  I  had  to 
put  my  arm  round  her  twice  to  get  any  kind  of 
leverage  for  waltzing." 

"  I  suppose  she  has  organs,"  said  Mrs.  Ford, 
natural-philosophically,  "  but  I  don't  know  what 
she  does  with  them  when  she  is  dressed." 

"  That  was  a  nice-looking  girl  with  you,  Wal 
ter,  with  hair." 

"  An  exhaustive  description,"  laughed  Walter. 

"  Jane  Courcy,"  said  Mrs.  Ford,  whose  vigi 
lance  nothing  escaped  ;  "  ridiculous  to  see  a 
young  girl  with  such  a  wig  piled  atop  —  puffed 
up,  and  fluffed  out,  and  rolled  over,  and  flatted 
down,  and  twisted  round.  It  is  strange  people 
can't  see  that  hair  is  hair,  and  not  a  mere  market 
able  commodity." 

"  She  had  a  beautiful  complexion,  too,  Aunt 
Fanny." 

"  It  won't  wash." 


90  FIRST  LOVE  IS  BEST. 

"O,  no!" 

"  O,  yes  !  " 

"  It  was  too  beautiful  and  natural." 

"  Katherine  Havilaud,  do  you  think  I  don't 
know  paint  when  I  see  it?" 

"  /don't,  then,"  said  Katy.  "Was  that  tall 
Miss  May  painted  ?  " 

"  Not  she.  She  has  too  much  sense,  and  I 
never  can  tell  where  she  got  it,  nor  her  coffee- 
colored  face,  for  her  mother  was  the  handsomest 
fool  of  my  early  acquaintance." 

"Mrs.  Ford,"  said  Walter,  laughing,  "you 
are  a  chaperon  in  a  thousand,  warding  off  every 
one's  charms  from  Kate,  who  does  not  need  it, 
by  the  way." 

"  I  trust  I  am  not  afraid  to  use  my  eyes  for 
fear  it  should  be  called  backbiting,"  said  Mrs. 
Ford  scornful  alike  of  men  and  metaphors. 
"  Mary  May  is  a  sensible  girl,  and  I  am  very 
fond  of  her,  but  she  is  coffee-colored,  and  does 
not  know  how  to  wear  clothes." 

"  Who  does?"  asked  Katy,  "for  an  ensample." 

"  Harriet  Clapham.  She  looked  just  as  if  she 
had  stepped  out  of  a  picture ;  and  Bessie  Averill, 
who  was  a  picture  herself  in  that  lovely  muslin, 
all  ferns  and  lilies.  Kate,  she  painted  that  gown 
herself." 

"  Yes,"  said  Kate,  "  that  is  the  kind  of  paint 
even  /know." 


A   SENTIMENTAL  SKETCH.  91 

"  Mr.  Laballe,  is  that  young  Fraser  engaged  to 
her,  or  is  he  only  flirting  ?  " 

"  Engaged,  I  am  afraid,  Mrs.  Ford.  It  ought 
to  be  a  statutory  offence." 

"  What  is  his  crime  ?  "  asked  Kate. 

"  Looking  like  the  idiot  he  is,  for  one  thing," 
answered  Mrs.  Ford.  "  He  was  standing  near 
you  half  an  hour,  Kate,  with  eye-glass  in  one 
eye,  and  chin  in  the  air.  Did  you  not  see 
him?" 

"  I  don't  remember  any  suspended  chin,  Aunt 
Fanny." 

"  Don't  ask  Kate  any  questions  this  side  of 
the  Silurian  epoch,  Mrs.  Ford.  She  had  no 
eyes  for  anybody  but  that  fossil  in  spectacles. 
I  had  to  wrench  her  off  from  the  old  red  sand 
stone  to  bring  her  home." 

"  It  was  the  only  real  enjoyment  I  had  for  the 
evening,"  said  Kate,  naively. 

"  Why,  Kate  !  " 

"  O,  of  course  I  had  nice  little  common  times. 
But  this  was  something  really  splendid,  and  to 
be  remembered." 

*'  It  was  a  veritable  conquest  oil  both  sides, 
Mrs.  Ford,  I  assure  you,"  said  Walter  to  her 
aunt.  "  Kate,  I  shall  be  desperately  jealous  if 
you  go  on  in  this  way.  A  demure  little  country- 
girl,  and  to  develop  into  an  arrant  flirt  the  very 
first  night !  " 

"  O,  don't  talk  so,  Walter,"  said  Katherine,  a 


92  FIRST  LOVE  IS  BEST. 

little  impatiently.  "  I  don't  like  to  have  you 
talk  so,  even  in  jest.  It  seems  to  demean  Mr. 
Franklin  to  use  his  name  in  such  a  way." 

"  O,  of  course  he  is  altogether  too  superior  and 
remote  for  such  familiar  and  frivolous  words;  but 
upon  my  honor,  Mrs.  Ford,  if  you  had  kept  an 
eye  on  the  corner  behind  you,  you  would  have 
seen  something  uncommonly  like  the  thing  under 
your  very  wing." 

"  If  Kate  enjoyed  herself,  I  am  content,"  said 
Mrs.  Ford.  "  She  certainly  did  not  interfere 
with  my  enjoyment." 

"  If  flirting  is  to  have  the  most  delightful  talk 
with  people  who  know  things  and  like  to  tell 
them,  then  I  shall  always  have  a  good  word  to 
say  for  flirting,"  added  Kate. 

"  That  is  the  way  they  all  think,  only  they 
don't  all  speak  out  quite  so  frankly." 

"  Who  is  it  that  you  mean  by  'they,'  Walter?  " 

"  Innocent  little  heart-breakers  like  you  —  the 
most  vicious  kind  of  all." 

"  Aunt  Fanny,  don't  you  think  you  ought  to 
come  to  my  defence,  seeing  I  am  under  your 
protection  ?  " 

"  If  I  needed  to  come  to  your  defence,  you 
would  not  be  under  my  protection,"  said  Mrs. 
Ford,  in  her  best  Johnsonese. 

"  Certainly  not,"  cried  Mr.  Laballe,  gayly  cap 
ping  Johnson  with  Webster.  "There  she  is. 
Behold  her,  and  judge  for  yourselves.  Going 


A  SENTIMENTAL  SKETCH.  93 

at  the  rate  of  sixty  revolutions  the  minute. 
The  venerable  Prex  had  so  much  ado  to  keep 
up  with  her  that  his  spectacles  flashed  like  a 
hundred-faceted  lens,  cutting  around  sharp  cor 
ners  after  her." 

"  What  did  you  talk  about  ? "  asked  Mrs. 
Ford. 

"  O,  many  things.  The  Brahmins,  and  all 
about  Unitarians,  and  how  there  is  always,  and 
always  will  be,  a  right  and  left  in  all  religions  —  " 

"  That  is  the  French  Assembly,"  interjaculated 
Walter.  "  You  have  got  your  religion  mixed  up 
with  other  things  this  time." 

"  It  would  not  be  worth  much  as  a  religion  if 
it  weren't,"  retorted  Kate.  "  President  Franklin 
has  been  in  India  and  he  was  very  interesting, 
telling  me  about  the  old  astronomy,  and  the  one 
ness  in  everything,  and  the  Aztecs,  and  why  you 
can  hope  for  immortality  outside  of  the  Bible,  — 
though,  of  course,"  added  Kate,  argumentatively 
and  reflectively,  "  life  and  immortality  are  brought 
to  light  only  through  the  gospel, — and  about  the 
Catacombs." 

"  A  lively  old  party,"  muttered  Walter,  strok 
ing  his  whiskers. 

"Well,"  parried  Kate,  laughing,  "it  sounds 
differently  when  you  just  name  it  over.  But  it 
was  not  a  bit  funereal  to  talk." 

"So  it  was  for  the  Aztecs,  and  the  skeletons, 
and  such  trash,  that  you  threw  me  over  ?  " 


94  FIRST  LOVE  IS  BEST. 

"  Threw  you  over  ?  " 

"  Did  you  not  do  me  the  honor  to  say  that  all 
you  enjoyed  was  the  president  ?  " 

"  O,  but  I  scarcely  saw  you  for  the  evening, 
only  to  walk  with  you  a  little  at  first,  and  to 
dance  with  you  once.  I  did  not  expect  it,  of 
course,"  added  Kate,  quickly.  "  Of  course  peo 
ple  don't  go  to  parties  to  see  —  you  !  "  blushing 
a  little  at  her  unspoken  thought. 

"  No  ;  I  think  we  can  devise  something  better 
than  that,"  said  Walter,  "  when  it  comes  to  per 
sonal  enjoyment.  All  the  same,  don't  you  de 
vote  yourself  too  exclusively  to  college  presi 
dents,  and  that  sort  of  truck.  I  am  not  jealous, 
Kitty,  so  I  can  speak  my  mind.  There's  a  wife 
or  two,  not  to  mention  a  dozen  or  so  children 
scattered  along  that  presidential  path,  so  he 
won't  be  likely  to  cut  across  mine.  But  you 
let  the  Sanscrit  folks  alone." 

"  In  my  humble  sphere,"  said  Kate,  tartly, 
"  we  think  learned  people  very  respectable." 

"  So  do  we,"  said  Walter,  imitating  her  tone. 
"  We  take  off  our  hats  to  them.  We  plume  our 
selves  on  being  able  to  take  off  our  hats  to  them. 
But  we  never  make  much  headway  in  point  of 
social  prestige  by  flirting  with  them." 

"  O,  there  you  are  saying  that  again." 

"  Well,  then,  we  don't  come  up  from  the 
country  and  put  on  our  purple  and  fine  linen 
for  the  sake  of  declining  dances  with  half  a 


A  SENTIMENTAL  SKETCH.  95 

dozen  of  the  first  men  in  society,  and  standing 
in  a  corner  to  talk  mammoths  and  mastodons 
all  the  evening  with  a  blear-eyed  antique  in 
gold-bowed  glasses,  who  does  not  know  whether 
we  are  dressed  in  gold  tissue  or  swathed  in  a 
mummy  cloth." 

"  O,  Walter,  you  don't  really  care  that  I  did 
not  dance  more !  Indeed,  I  did  not  feel  in  the 
mood  at  all." 

"  No,  Kitty,  not  really.  If  you  enjoyed  your 
self,  that  is  all.  But  I  am  ambitious  for  you,  I 
own.  I  want  you  to  shine  out  with  the  bril 
liancy  that  belongs  to  you.  But  you  need  not 
hurry.  Take  your  own  time.  I  only  want 
really — under  all  the  badinage — that  you  shall 
not  waste  yourself.  Talk  as  much  as  you  like 
to  respectable  old  coves,  like  the  president.  It 
is  an  advantage  to  be  known  to  be  on  good 
terms  with  the  like  of  him.  But  don't  let  your 
self  be  monopolized  by  them.  Your  star  will 
rise  far  more  rapidly  if  you  circulate  well  among 
people  shallower,  perhaps,  but  far  more  brilliant 
and  fashionable.  It  is  they  who  will  stamp  you 
as  current  coin.  He  may  certify  the  bullion.  I 
want  you  to  be  reckoned  sensible,  dear,  but  I 
also  want  you  to  be  counted  —  gay  —  not  to  say 
—  now,  Miss  Puss,  don't  be  shocked  if  I  say 
fashionable.  I  am  not  sure  that  I  want  you  to 
be  —  intellectual.  That  is,  be  as  intellectual  as 
you  like,  but  don't  have  the  name  of  it.  Am  I 


96  FIRST  LOVE  IS  BEST. 

an  exacting  old  wretch,  Katy,  wholly  given  over 
to  the  god  of  this  world  ?  " 

"  But,  Walter,  why  do  you  care  so  much  how 
one  is  considered  ?  What  difference  does  it 
make  ?  Why  not  be  something,  and  never  mind 
what  you  are  thought  to  be  ?  " 

"  Because,  my  dear,  that  is  not  possible.  It 
sounds  very  well.  I  admire  it  as  a  sentiment, 
but  nobody  is  ever  indifferent  to  what  is  thought 
of  him." 

"  Not  wholly  indifferent.  I  do  not  mean  that. 
But,  for  instance,  now,  if  I  do  like  President 
Franklin,  why  not  let  it  be?  What  possible 
reason  is  there  why  I  should  be  known  to  like 
him,  or  not  known  ?  " 

"  You  would  not  like  to  have  the  reputation 
of  being  in  request  only  among  the  Antiques  and 
Horribles.  You  don't  want  to  be  courted  by 
people  who  court  a  Greek  root  or  a  new  kind  of 
fish  in 'the  same  way  they  do  you  !  " 

"  I  don't  know,"  said  Kate,  laughing  and 
blushing.  "I  certainly  don't  want  to  be  courted 
any  other  way." 

"  The  trouble  with  you,  Kate,  is  that  you  have 
made  your  market,  and  the  marketing  is  here 
under  your  own  eye,  as  snug  and  safe  as  Betsy 
Trotwood's  bandbox,  and  you  are  altogether 
too  independent  in  consequence.  If  you  weren't 
BO  deuced  sure  of  me  !  " 

"  O,  Walter  !  " 


A  SENTIMENTAL  SKETCH.  97 

"  Pardon  me,  dear  Kate,  and  don't  avenge 
yourself  by  flirting  with  all  the  young  fellows 
who  will  flock  around  you  as  soon  as  you  hold 
out  the  golden  sceptre." 

"But  I  don't  want  to  flirt  at  all,  Walter.  I 
don't  know  what  you  mean  by  it,  and  I  don't  care 
anything  about  it." 

"  O,  but  you  will  take  it  the  natural  way, 
when  the  time  comes.  Such  austerity  of  virtue 
is  too  heavenly  for  home  consumption.  A  girl 
must  have  a  spice  of  coquetry  to  be  perfect,  and 
you  are  perfect,  Katy.  Have  I  not  turned  that 
well  ?  The  rose  that  all  are  praising,  O,  that's 
the  rose  for  me." 

"  I  can  only  be  what  I  am,  "Walter.  I  can't 
make  myself  into  anything  else." 

"  And  if  you  should  dare  go  and  make  your 
self  into  anything  that  you  are  not  now,  into 
anything  other  than  you  are,  it  would  be  all 
over  between  us.  It  is  you  that  I  want,  not 
somebody  else."  And  then  they  drifted  into 
pleasant  little  foolish  talk,  that  says  so  little  and 
means  so  much,  and  the  party  and  the  talk  ended 
amicably. 

7 


VI. 

BUT  all  the  same  the  winter  went  on  disas 
trously.  Katherine  fought  unheeding,  but 
ail-valiantly  against  the  misgiving  that  Walter 
was  not  the  hero  she  had  imagined  him.  He  was 
fond  and  faithful,  he  was  cheerful  and  gay ;  but 
she  could  have  better  borne  that  he  was  grave 
and  absorbed,  less  ready  to  attend  her,  less  sat 
isfied  with  the  present.  He  was  always  kind  ; 
but  he  was  always  more  or  less  anxious,  even  as 
regarded  her,  about  matters  which  seemed  to  her 
insignificant  and  frivolous.  She  was  always,  at 
least  generally,  gentle,  suggestive,  and  acquies 
cent  ;  yet  she  was  always  more  or  less  indirectly, 
though  not  impalpably,  urging  him  to  serious 
ness,  to  duty,  to  application,  to  something  which 
should  satisfy  her  ideal  of  manhood.  And  some 
times  he  parried  her,  and  sometimes  he  jested,  and 
sometimes  he  overcame  her  with  tenderness;  but 
sometimes,  too,  he  grew  a  little  restive.  His  very 
absorption  in  amusement  made  Kate  draw  off  from 
it.  Her  natural  liking  for  fun  and  frolic  was  lost 

98 


A   SENTIMENTAL  SKETCH.  99 

in  anxiety  for  Walter,  —  in  resentment  against 
what  seemed  to  her  the  insidious  foe  of  his  abil 
ity  and  his  manhood.  Had  he  been  too  much 
devoted  to  business,  too  much  instigated  by  am 
bition,  too  desirous  of  securing  place  and  power, 
Katy  was  just  the  one  to  have  lured  him  into 
saner  ways.  It  would  have  been  her  delight  to 
win  him  to  repose  and  relaxation,  to  give  her 
own  bright  spirit  play  for  his  diversion  and  de 
light.  But  somehow  she  felt  now  as  if  all  the 
weight  of  sobriety  and  responsibility  were  on 
her,  as  if  to  join  and  sympathize  in  his  merry 
making  were  to  add  to  the  velocity,  the  strength, 
the  momentum  of  the  current  that  was  trying  to 
drag  him  down  —  not  down  to  ruin  —  she  did 
not  fear  that,  but  to  a  lower  level  than  was  his 
birthright ;  to  a  position,  to  a  standing,  which, 
however  satisfactory  to  others,  would  enlist  her 
regret,  her  pity,  rather  than  her  pride.  Her 
pity !  She  was  startled  at  the  word,  at  the 
thought,  and  then  she  was  startled  again  at  per 
ceiving  for  the  first  time  how  much  her  fear  for 
Walter  preponderated  over  her  hope  —  how 
much  more  apprehension  she  felt  for  him  than 
she  had  rest  in  him.  "  I  wonder  —  can  it  be  "  — 
thought  Katy,  "  that  this  is  the  common  way ! 
It  cannot  be.  It  is  not  the  way  I  thought  of, 
certainly." 

So  they  drew  more  and  more  apart.     Not  for 
mally,  not  consciously,  perhaps.     It  is  marvellous 


100  FIRST  LOVE  IS  BEST. 

how  much  of  our  mental  life  goes  on  without  our 
perceiving  it.  It  is  as  if  the  mind  were  absorbed 
in  working  out  its  problems,  and  only  when  the 
solution  is  complete  is  the  mind  at  leisure  to  re 
view  its  work  and  know  what  it  has  done.  Long 
after  these  thoughts,  these  convictions,  of  which 
we  were  unaware,  have  crj^stallized  into  actions, 
we  go  back  and  interpret  ourselves  to  ourselves. 
So  Walter  and  Kate  went  on  as  they  had  done, 
long  after  they  were  really  all  out  of  harmony 
with  each  other  ;  went  on  faltering,  stumbling, 
falling  out  of  line,  but  bravely  keeping  the  same 
path,  and  not  really  aware  that  they  were  not 
keeping  step.  But  Walter,  of  course,  could  not 
fail  to  be  influenced  by  Katherine's  misgivings. 
A  man  may  be  never  so  little  inclined  to  change 
his  course  in  life,  but  he  knows  whether  his  mis 
tress  adores  him  or  criticises  him.  And  he  basks 
in  the  adoration,  and  is  made  uncomfortable  by 
the  criticism,  —  especially  if  he  feels  within  him 
self  that  the  criticism  is  just,  and  has  not  the 
smallest  intention  of  seeking  to  deserve  it  less. 
Katherine,  too,  felt  the  jar  of  Walter's  dissatis 
faction,  —  or  if  that  is  too  strong,  his  lack  of 
utter,  absolute  satisfaction  with  her,  —  and  she 
had  tho  additional  advantage  or  disadvantage, 
whichever  it  might  be,  of  being  annoyed  with 
the  cause  of  dissatisfaction.  She  was,  unhappily, 
less  disturbed  at  not  being  his  ideal,  than  at  his 
ideal  itself.  She  had  no  ambition  to  become 


A   SENTIMENTAL  SKETCH.  101 

what  it  seemed  to  be  his  ambition  she  should  be 
come.  And  at  length,  slowly,  sadly,  almost  un 
awares,  but  surely,  the  question  arose  in  Kate's 
mind  :  were  they  suited  to  each  other  ?  Day  and 
night,  alone  and  in  societj^,  Kate  revolved  that 
question,  tried  many  a  test,  decided  now  this  way 
and  now  that,  and  as  constantly  revoked  her  de 
cision  ;  felt  sometimes  that  she  was  wronging 
Walter,  and  then  lavished  tenderness  on  him  by 
way  of  atonement ;  felt  then  discouraged  and 
distrait,  and  as  if  she  were  beating  against  wind 

o        o 

and  tide.  Then  she  resolved  upon  strong  meas 
ures,  and  taking  counsel  of  no  one,  wrote  one  day: 

"  MY  DEAR  WALTER."  (Then,  frightened, 
she  waited  till  she  was  on  the  eve  of  returning 
home,  and  in  desperation  and  weakness  finished 
her  letter,  and  left  it  for  him.)  "  It  is  not  quite 
fair,  perhaps,  to  write  to  you  as  I  am  about  to  do ; 
but  I  admit  frankly  that  I  am  a  coward,  and  have 
not  the  courage  to  say  it.  Besides,  it  is  very 
serious,  and  I  do  not  wish  to  be  turned  away  by 
anything  which  you  or  I  might  feel.  It  is  for  all 
our  life,  dear  Walter,  so  please  to  look  at  it  ex 
actly  as  it  is.  I  think  you  love  me.  I  have  not 
a  doubt  of  you,  and  not  a  reproach  for  you  ;  but 
I  do  think  we  are  not  suited  to  each  other.  At 
least,  I  am  not  suited  to  you.  I  am  too  sober  and 
old  —  not  old  in  years,  I  mean,  but  old  in  my  feel 
ings.  The  things  that  you  like  much,  I  do  not 


102  FIAST  LOVE  IS  BEST. 

care  for.  I  do  not  know  how  to  say  that  you  do 
not  suit  me,  for  that  would  not  be  true.  I  think 
if  you  would  be  what  Heaven  meant  you  to  be, 
you  would  be  everything  that  I  should  desire  ; 
but  it  seems  to  me,  dear,  that  you  never  will  be 
that,  because  you  are  so  waylaid  by  little  things, 
and  you  do  not  put  them  down,  and  give  your 
self  to  large  things  ;  and  that  would  make  me 
always  discontented.  This  sounds  as  if  I  were 
setting  myself  up  above  you.  You  know  that  is 
not  true,  dear  Walter.  It  is  only  for  yourself, 
and  of  yourself,  that  I  want  great  things,  and 
that  because  I  am  sure  they  are  in  you.  Don't 
think  I  am  leaving  you  disgusted;  but  you  know 
it  would  be  no  good  my  staying  with  you,  and 
just  teasing  you.  I  cannot  believe  it  is  at  all  the 
thing  for  married  people  to  have  to  adjust  them 
selves  to  each  other.  You  have  to  adjust  your 
self  to  everybody  else  ;  but  people  ought  to  marry 
only  because  they  are  already  adapted  to  each 
other  by  nature.  Dear  Walter,  the  least  little 
jar  coming  between  us  would  be  suspicious  ;  and 
if  you  look  back,  you  will  perceive  that  there 
has  been  a  continuity  of  jar  all  along.  Not  in 
tentionally,  dear  ;  not  your  fault,  nor  mine  ;  but 
just  that  we  do  not  harmonize. 

"  Dear  Walter,  if  you  only  would  be  your 
best,  everything  would  be  as  I  thought  it.  But 
as  it  is,  let  us  be  good  friends,  and  never  any 
thing  more.  I  must  always  be  your  true  friend ; 


A   SENTIMENTAL  SKETCH.  1Q3 

but  I  cannot  consent  to  be  an  obstacle  in  your 
path  because  you  will  not  consent  to  take  mine. 

"  As  I  read  this  letter  over  it  seems  to  be 
cold  and  fault-finding.  Let  all  the  fault-finding 
be  turned  towards  myself,  if  you  choose,  for  it 
may  be  that  I  alone  am  wrong.  But  it  makes  no 
difference  who  is  right  and  who  is  wrong  ;  if  one 
is  one  way  and  the  other  the  other,  we  are  not 
together,  whichever  you  call  wrong.  I  am  not 
cold,  and  I  do  not  pretend  I  am  happy.  But  it 
seems  to  me  I  am  doing  what  is  best.  It  is  very 
little  to  say  that  I  shall  always  be  your  friend." 

And  Katy  put  this  letter  into  the  post-office 
herself,  and  said  good-by  to  her  aunt  and  to 
Walter,  feeling  altogether  a  coward  and  a  trai 
tor  ;  and  went  home  to  her  father,  and  in  the  new 
gladness  of  welcome  tried  to  forget  that  she  had 
written  any  letter.  But  she  had  written  it;  and 
when  the  well-known  handsome  handwriting 
that  she  loved  appeared  again,  she  tore  open  the 
letter  with  an  eagerness  and  a  hopefulness  which 
she  would  have  been  at  a  loss  to  explain,  and 
read : 

"  MY  DEAR  KATE  :  Your  letter  distressed, 
but  did  not  surprise  me.  I  do  not  know  that  I 
can  say  aught  to  change  your  decision..  I  never 
supposed  I  was  good  enough  fpr  you,  for  I  think 
you  are  a  good  girl,  Kate,  if  there  ever  was  one. 


104  FIRST  LOVE  IS  BEST. 

and  I  know  that  I  am  a  good-for-nothing  fellow. 
Sometimes  when  I  have  been  talking  with  you, 
in  your  most  fiery-souled  moods,  I  have  felt  a  stir, 
and  if  there  had  been  any  '  push  '  in  me,  you 
would  have  pushed  me  ahead.  But  there  isn't. 
I  can't  lie  to  you,  Katy,  and  it  would  be  no  use 
if  I  did.  I  am  a  humbug,  and  I  know  it,  and 
despise  myself  for  it  ;  but  I  am  not  any  the  less 
a  humbug  for  that,  and  the  worst  of  it  is  that 
you  have  all  along  been  finding  it  out.  I  was  not 
a  humbug  in  loving  you,  for  I  do  love  you  hon 
estly  and  dearly,  and  if  I  had  anything  to  live 
on  I  should  not  let  you  go  so  easily  ;  but  should 
hold  you  fast,  and  let  you  try  your  hand  at  mak 
ing  me  over.  But  as  it  is,  I  only  jog  along  from 
hand  to  mouth,  half  the  time,  as  you  know,  at 
the  mercy  of  my  crabbed  old  uncle,  who  doles 
out  his  dollars  with  innuendos  and  lectures  that 
swallow  up  more  than  the  money  is  worth,  and 
be  hanged  to  it  all.  I  hate  my  profession,  and 
I  don't  love  any  other.  I  was  born  to  spend 
money,  not  to  earn  it,  and  it  is  a  confounded 
shame  and  misplacement  that  I  was  not  endowed 
according  to  my  talents.  I  hate  to  give  you  up. 
The  best  thing  in  my  life  will  leave  me  when 
you  go  from  me.  I  would  be  a  good  husband  to 
37ou,  Katy,  if  I  could  be  your  husband  at  all.  But, 
miscreant  as  I  am,  I  have  too  much  manhood  to 
keep  you  watching  and  waiting  for  an  improve 
ment  that  will  never  come;  or  to  waste  the  bright 


A  SENTIMENTAL  SKETCH.  105 

years  of  your  youth  in  bothering  over  a  man 
who  will  never  do  you  the  least  credit.  I  am 
no  great  shakes,  but  I  am  too  great  a  shake  for 
that. 

"  So  here  ends  the  first  lesson.  You  certainly 
are  not  wrong.  I  think  sometimes  you  have 
been  a  little  hard  on  me,  just  because  you  were 
built  on  so  energetic  a  scale  that  you  could  not 
appreciate  the  difficulties  that  beset  a  fellow 
whose  walls  and  dome  looked  strong  enough,  but 
whose  underpinning  was  somehow  left  out.  But 
I  don't  know  that  it  is  any  use  to  quarrel  with 
Destiny.  I  suppose  I  can  breast  fate  that  dooms 
me  from  within  as  well  as  another  who  is  ruined 
from  without.  I  have  at  least  pluck  enough  not 
to  whine.  The  burning  tears  are  in  my  eyes, 
but  I  can  dash  them  all  away.  God  bless  you, 
Kate,  and  give  you  to  some  man  more  worthy  of 
you  than  I.  I  have  felt  all  along  that  I  did  not 
suit  you,  and  I  knew  the  tears  you  shed  at  part 
ing  were  more  of  disappointment  in  me  than  sor 
row  at  leaving  me. 

«  Good-by." 

Katherine  sat  stunned  after  reading  this  letter. 
She  had  received  a  blow  as  violent  as  unex 
pected.  She  did  not  ask  herself  what  reply  she 
had  looked  for  to  her  letter.  She  knew  perfectly 
well  that  she  had  not  contemplated  any  such 
issue  as  this.  She  was  not  a  hypocrite ;  but  in 


106  FIRST  LOVE   IS  BEST. 

writing  to  Walter,  in  thinking  to  give  him  up, 
she  had  not  really  looked  such  relinquishment  in 
the  face.  She  had  all  along  an  underlying  hope 
that  her  heroic  treatment  would  cure  the  patient, 
not  kill  the  physician.  What  she  had  really 
counted  on  was  that  Walter  would  see  the  seri 
ousness  of  the  emergency,  that  he  would  be  once 
for  all  shocked  out  of  his  versatile  life,  out  of 
his  unworthy  aims,  which  hardly  seemed  more 
than  aimlessness,  that  he  would  concentrate  his 
power,  grasp  the  opportunity  that  awaited  him, 
and  bring  forth  fruit  meet  for  repentance.  Kate 
looked  for  a  letter  full  of  love  and  pleading,  self- 
reproach,  and  resolution,  and  remonstrance,  and 
she  was  in  a  melting  mood  before  it  came,  and 
prepared  to  forgive,  and  encourage,  and  console, 
—  poor  girl.  And  now  Walter  had  taken  her  at 
her  word !  and  she  was  as  amazed  and  appalled 
as  if  the  blow  had  originated  with  him.  She 
read  and  re-read  the  letter,  comprehending  more 
and  more  clearly  with  each  perusal  that  it  was 
final.  She  was  so  wretched,  so  forlorn,  so  de 
spairing,  that  she  felt  one  moment  as  if  she  must 
go  to  him,  —  must  throw  herself  at  his  feet,  and 
beg  him  to  forgive  her  and  take  her  back,  let 
come  what  might.  Then  she  re-read  the  letter, 
and  her  self-respect,  beaten  down  by  her  love, 
rose  again,  miserable  but  inflexible,  and  told  her 
that  he  had  relinquished  her  without  a  struggle. 
He  had  accepted  the  first  overture  of  release. 


A   SENTIMENTAL  SKETCH.  107 

He  made  no  resistance.  He  begged  no  delay. 
He  resigned  himself  to  the  situation  without  re- 

o 

monstrance,  and  it  was  not  for  her  to  rebel 
against  it.  Besides,  was  it  not  even  too  evident 
that,  though  she  had  taken  the  initiative,  he  had 
been  sensible  of  relief  ?  There  was  love  ;  Kate 
felt  that  he  had  been  sincere.  He  had  not  simu 
lated  a  feeling  which  he  had  not.  But  O  !  what 
kind  of  love  was  it  ?  She  who  had  so  worshipped 
heroism ;  she  who  had  been  so  exacting ;  she 
who  would  admit  nothing  less  than  the  greatest, 
who  demanded  that  love  should  be  unperverted 
and  ail-conquering,  —  she  had  been  able  to  inspire 
only  this  feeble  and  powerless  passion,  some 
thing  subordinate  to  commonest  circumstances, 
something  that  had  no  influence  and  no  impulse, 
something  that  gave  way  under  the  first  stress,  — 
why,  how  was  Walter  weighted  in  the  race  more 
than  other  men  ?  And  then  she  stabbed  herself 
for  having  stabbed  him,  and  saw  it  was  only  be 
cause  she  was  not  strong  enough  to  inspire  him. 
Katy  was  so  perturbed  and  miserable  over  the 
main  point  that  she  had  no  eye  for  side  issues. 
She  was  not  amused  by  the  weak,  whimsical 
frankness  with  which  Walter  admitted  his  short 
comings.  She  did  not  observe  the  comical  ease 
with  which,  towards  the  close,  he  lapsed  into 
self-pity,  quite  warming  into  enthusiasm  at  the 
thought  of  his  own  wrongs  and  sufferings.  She 
did  not  clearly  see  the  fatal  selfishness  out  of 


108  FIRST  LOVE  IS  BEST. 

which  neither  duty  nor  shame  could  rouse  him  ; 
the  manhood,  the  bravery  which  would  nerve 
itself  to  relinquish  her  calmly,  but  not  to  become 
worthy  of  retaining  her.  She  only  saw  that  be 
tween  herself  and  Walter  all  was  over ;  that  she 
had  suggested  it,  that  he  would  have  it  so,  and 
that  it  was  better  it  should  be  so.  Her  pride, 
her  dignity,  her  love,  her  perception  were  alike 
aggrieved.  She  was  wounded  and  suffering  at 
every  point. 

Nothing  of  all  this  showed  itself  in  her  de 
meanor.  She  received  and  returned  all  glad 
greetings.  She  interested  herself  in  all  home 
ways  and  in  all  the  happenings  of  her  absence. 
When  she  was  alone,  it  is  true,  she  often  found 
herself  arrested  midway  in  any  errand  whatever, 
and  gazing  fixedly  at  nothing,  while  her  sad  mind 
travelled  its  weary  round  of  reflection  and  fore 
casting.  But  one  day  at  erentide,  when  she  had 
become  so  familiar  with  her  loneliness  and  mis 
ery  that  she  thought  she  could  mention  it  lightly, 
she  said,  gently,  "  Papa,  I  have  a  thing  to  tell 
you  that  you  will  not  grieve  to  hear.  It  is  all 
over  between  Mr.  Laballe  and  me." 

"  No,  Katy ;  but  is  it,  really  ?  " 

"  Really,  papa." 

"  How  came  that  ?  " 

"  There  was  nothing  else,  dear.  It  was  best," 
she  replied,  thoughtfully. 

"  Did  it  seem  best  to  yourself,  Kate?  " 


A  SENTIMENTAL  SKETCH.  109 

"  Yes,  papa,  to  me.  You  were  right  from  the 
beginning.  I  am  sorry,  but  you  were  right." 

"  Did  it  come  about  because  you  found  I  was 
right,  or  from  some  other  reason?  " 

"  Only  that.  Walter  was  not  to  blame  at  all, 
and  I  do  not  think  I  was,  or  that  he  thinks  I  was. 
It  is  simply  that  I  feared  we  were  not  suited  to 
each  other.  I  was  not  quite  content  with  him, 
nor,  indeed,  was  he  with  me  ;  and  I  suppose  we 
never  should  have  been  content.  But  the  sug 
gestion  came  wholly  from  me,  without  any  provo 
cation  from  him,  and  he  accepted  it  as  the  best 
thing.  He  is  utterly  blameless,  papa.  You  need 
have  no  feeling  against  him,  even  in  your 
thoughts." 

u  My  dear  Kate,  I  am  too  glad  it  is  over  to 
blame  him.  Even  if  it  had  come  from  him  I 
should  still  have  been  glad.  But  that  your  good 
sense  should  have  discerned  him,  that  you  should 
have  done  this  of  your  own  free  will,  is  too  good 
news  for  me  to  higgle  over  the  manner  of  it.  I 
would  never  spoil  your  happiness,  and  I  certainly 
would  never  force  your  will,  (as  if  the  dear  man 
ever  would  have  tried !  Katy  did  a  much  larger 
business  in  forcing  his  ;)  but  I  never  thought  him 
a  fit  mate  for  you,  and  I  shall  breathe  the  easier 
that  you  have  found  it  out." 

"But  don't  be  severe  on  him,  papa.  I  have 
given  him  up  wholly.  We  shall  never  be  any 
thing  more  to  each  other  than  we  are  now.  But 


110  FIRST  LOVE  IS  BEST. 

I  feel  very  warmly  and  kindly  towards  him,  and 
I  think  he  was  —  true  to  me  —  in  his  way.  You 
must  think  very  kindly  of  him." 

"  Trust  me  for  that,  Kitty.  I  shall  not  think 
of  him  at  all,  so  make  yourself  easy.  He  is  not  a 
man  I  should  ever  think  of  twice,  except  for  you." 

Kate  was  too  absorbed  to  feel  the  slight 
put  upon  her  choice.  She  was  silent,  and  her 
father  said  presently,  as  a  new  thought  struck 
him,  — 

"  How  is  it,  Kate,  you  are  not  unhappy  ?  You 
have  done  this  of  your  own  choice  ?  " 

"  Entirely  of  my  own  choice,  papa.  But  you 
know  I  was  very  much  in  earnest,  and  —  and  —  I 
cannot  say  —  it  would  not  be  worth  while  to  be 
perfectly  light-hearted  after  having  made  so  se 
rious  a  mistake.  I  feel  sure  I  am  right  now  ;  but 
of  course  I  don't  feel  yet  quite  as  I  did  before." 

"  Yes,  deary,  I  understand.  You  would  not  be 
yourself  if  you  did.  I  cannot,  to  be  sure,"  said 
Mr.  Haviland,  reflectively,  "  understand  how  you 
ever  could  have  set  a  value  upon  him.  You  are 
so  clever  and  discerning,  and  he  is  such  light 
weight.  But  never  mind.  I  cannot  tell  you, 
Kate,  how  relieved  I  am  that  it  is  over."  And 
so  Mr.  Haviland  dismissed  the  subject.  It  is 
really  wonderful  how  an  elderly  gentleman  can 
be  exceedingly  fond  of  his  daughter  and  yet  fail 
to  put  himself  in  her  place.  Mr.  Haviland  simply 
transferred  to  Katy  his  own  opinion  of  her  lover, 


A   SENTIMENTAL  SKETCH.  HI 

and  had  no  idea  of  the  blank  dismay  which  lay 
over  her  mind,  brooding  and  shadowing  it. 

Otherwise,  matters  went  on  much  as  before. 
It  was  not  a  village  where  engagements  are  con 
sidered  as  public  matters  as  marriage.  Girls  did 
not  treat  their  lovers  as  wives  treat  their  hus 
bands,  and  had  not  forgotten  to  blush  at  the 
mention  of  one  name,  or  the  approach  of  a  certain 
footstep.  It  is  all  very  right  and  proper,  no 
doubt,  to  do  away  with  all  this  blushing  and 
backwardness  and  shy  secrecy ;  but  somehow,  in 
laughing  away  the  bashful  ness  of  love,  is  not 
something  of  the  bloom  of  love  also  brushed 
away  ? 

So  had  Katherine  no  questioning,  surmise, 
or  banter  to  meet.  The  engagement  had  not 
been  known,  the  acquaintance  had  not  been  vis 
ibly  interrupted.  Only  to  Mr.  Glynn  —  of  all 
persons  in  the  world  —  Katherine  felt,  was  the 
revelation  due.  Utterly  sad  and  straightforward, 
it  did  not  occur  to  her  that  her  motive  might  be 
misconstrued.  She  had  as  yet  learned  to  look 
only,  or  chiefly,  at  the  thing  to  be  done,  and  not 
at  the  attitude  she  might  present  in  doing  it. 
Fortunately  for  Katherine,  her  lack  of  wisdom 
was  not  revealed  to  the  world,  but  only  to  one 
man.  who  knew  her  too  well  to  mistake  simplicity 
for  design ;  though  even  he  did  not  at  first  quite 
comprehend  the  purpose  which  actuated  her, 
while  yet  fully  comprehending  what  was  not  her 


112  FIRST  LCVE  IS  BEST. 

purpose.  Nevertheless,  a  great  rush  of  joy  filled 
his  heart,  every  trace  of  which  he  sought  sedu 
lously  to  banish  from  his  face. 

"  Miss  Katy,  I  don't  know  how  you  expect  me 
to  feel  about  this,  but  I  cannot  regret  anything 
in  it  except  your  trouble.  I  don't  know  what  to 
say,"  he  confessed,  ingenuously,  —  a  fact  which 
must  have  been  clear  to  the  most  casual  observer. 

"  I  do  not  expect  you  to  feel,  and  you  need 
not  say  anything,"  said  Katherine,  Avith  the 
ghost  of  a  smile ;  "  only  I  wanted  to  tell  you  be 
cause  it  makes  me  feel  easier  towards  you  —  about 
you." 

"You  do  not  mean  —  "  he  began,  eagerly,  and 
stopped  abruptly.  He  knew  she  did  not  mean 
that,  and  throttled  the  suggestion  on  the  spot. 

"  When  I  was  most  happy,  I  could  not  forget 
that  you  were  —  not,  and  that  it  was  my  doing. 
It  seems  strange  that  I  should  have  power  to 
make  you  unhappy  and  none  to  make  you  happy 
—  nor  myself  —  nor  any  one  —  "  Kate  threatened 
here  to  go  off  into  a  long,  silent  reverie  ;  but  she 
thought  better  of  it,  evidently,  —  "  Everything  is 
so  strange.  But  it  seemed  as  if  it  was  selfish  and 
heartless  to  be  as  happy  as  I  could  be  ;  because 
why  should  I  be  favored  and  you  not  ?  If  some 
one  else  had  troubled  you,  it  would  have  been 
bad  enough ;  but  it  was  all  through  me.  All  my 
joy  was  your  sorrow.  Now  —  I  do  not  know 
that  I  can  make  you  quite  understand — but  I 


A   SENTIMENTAL   SKETCH.  H3 

feel  that  it  is  a  sort  of  justice  fate  owes  you,  to 
know  that  we  are  equal  in  trouble." 

"  Kitty,  you  surely  do  not  think  I  could  be  so 
base  as  to  rejoice  in  any  misfortune  that  could 
befall  you.  To  be  unhappy  in  one  love  will  not, 
I  suppose,  make  another  more  acceptable." 

"  I  do  not  mean  that  at  all,  or  anything  against 
you.  But  it  satisfies  me  towards  you.  I  no 
longer  must  conceal  my  feelings  from  you  lest 
they  give  you  pain.  I  do  not  have  to  feel  heart 
less  in  being  happy  when  you  are  not.  I  want 
you  to  know  that  —  if  I  ever  —  caused  you  —  any 
bitterness,  I  have  tasted  that  bitterness  myself 
in  full  measure." 

"  Yet  the  separation  was  your  own  doing  ?  " 

"  In  a  sense  it  was.  In  any  sense  to  be  indig 
nant  about,  I  did  it.  But  I  am  so  lost,  why  should 
I  conceal  it  ?  It  was  —  he  who  rejected  me.  On 
the  outside  I  released  him  first.  But  I  feel  more 
and  more,  every  day,  that  he  was  glad  to  be  re 
leased.  Yes,  Mr.  Glynn,"  looking  straight  into 
his  eyes,  "it  is  I  who  was  rejected." 

"  Fool !  "  ejaculated  Mr.  Glynn. 

"  No,  he  was  no  fool.  In  some  points  he  was 
not  wholly  strong.  But  he  had  every  talent,  and 
if  I  had  but  possessed  the  power  to  influence 
him,  he  would  be  a  king  among  men." 

"Better  be  content  with  a  republic,"  said  — 
shall  I  say  sneered?  —  Mr.  Glynn,  divided  be 
tween  anger  and  —  such  is  man  —  delight. 


114  FIRST  LOVE  IS  BEST. 

"  At  some  time,"  continued  Katherine,  "  there 
may  come  a  woman  who  will  be  able  to  inspire 
him  with  a  love  so  warm  as  to  kindle  his  pur 
pose.  That  is  what  he  needs  —  that  is  what  I 
thought  to  do  ;  and  then  I  shall  be  surprised  at 
no  achievement.  But  I  do  not  hide  from  myself, 
nor  from  you,  that  I  failed." 

"  Katy,"  cried  Mr.  Glynn,  with  a  gesture  of 
impatience,  "  I  can't  say  what  I  think,  because  it 
would  vex  you  and  pain  you,  and  perhaps  do 
me  a  mischief;  but  I  want  you  to  understand 
that  "  —  that  Laballe  is  a  fool,  and  you  are  an 
other,  was  what  was  in  his  mind,  but  the  one  fool 
occupied  in  his  esteem  so  different  a  position 
from  the  other,  the  folly  of  the  first  had  served 
him  so  good  a  turn,  and  the  folly  of  the  second 
was  so  harmless  and  even  pathetic,  and  moreover 
he  was  a  man  and  she  was  a  woman,  —  so,  alto 
gether,  he  minced  words  and  ended  lamely,  — 
"  that  I  don't  subscribe  to  your  opinions." 

"  Do  you  not  ?  "  said  Kate,  listlessly. 

"  Not  a  jot.  It  is  simple  nonsense,  as  I  could 
show  you  if  you  would  stand  it,  which  you  will 
not.  You  are  a  sensible  girl,  but  you  have  not 
the  data." 

"  I  do  not  know  whether  it  is  sense  or  non 
sense,"  said  Kate,  only  half  heeding  him,  and 
gazing  steadfastly  into  the  fire,  "  but  I  have  lost 
my  life." 

"  And  I  have  found  mine,"  cried  Mr.  Glynn, 


A   SENTIMENTAL   SKETCH.  115 

abruptly.  Katharine  looked  up  with  languid  in 
quiry.  She  could  not  have  seen  the  color  flush 
into  his  swarthy  face  even  had  not  the  firelight 
cast  its  glamour  over  him  ;  and  she  was  in  any 
case  too  much  concerned  with  her  own  thoughts 
to  know  how  deeply  he  was  moved. 

"  Kate,  I  do  not  know  how  I  should  have  felt 
to  see  you  married  to  a  man  worthy  of  you.  It 
might  have  been  a  sharper  pain  in  some  ways,  but 
there  could  not  have  been  the  madness  of  seeing 
you  fall  into  the  hands  of  one  incapable  of  appre 
ciating  you.  I  have  escaped  so  great  a  danger 
that  I  count  myself  this  day  a  happy  man." 

"You?" 

"  Yes,  I,"  (half  impatient  at  the  slight  surprise 
in  her  tone,  it  so  plainly  asked  what  had  he  to  do 
with  it.)  "  I  thought  you  were  going  to  be  lost 
to  me  in  that  worst  of  all  deeps,  an  unequal 
marriage.  And  here  I  have  you,  before  me,  in 
your  own  house,  free,  never  to  be  sullied  by  that 
—  not  to  waste  your  life  in  trying  to  hold  up  a 
dead  weight ;  never  to  experience  the  long  an 
guish  of  a  slow  undeceiving,  when  it  is  too  late. 
Now  it  is  not  too  late.  Thank  God,  everything 
is  saved." 

"  I  thought  not,"  said  Katy,  with  a  touch  of 
her  old  mischief.  "But  never  mind.  I  have  told 
you  what  I  wished  you  to  know,  and  we  need 
speak  of  it  no  more." 

"  But,  Katy,  I  want  you  to  be  happy." 


116  FIRST  LOVE  IS  BEST. 

"  Happy  !  "  said  Kate,  incredulously.  Happi 
ness  was  a  thing  from  which  she  had  so  long 
parted,  a  thing  from  which  she  seemed  so  for 
ever  remote,  that  the  mention  of  it  appeared  in 
congruous. 

"  O,  I  do  not  mind  happiness.  I  shall  do  very 
well.  It  is  only  that  my  life  is  over.  I  wonder 
how  long  one  can  live  after  one  is  dead.  O,  I 
wonder  if  in  the  stars  one  can  ever,  ever  forget !  " 

Mr.  Gljrnu  left  the  room  abruptly,  and  Kathe- 
rine  did  not  so  much  as  know  that  he  went. 

The  days  dragged  on,  and  Katherine  nerved 
herself  to  pleasant  words  and  cheerful  looks  and 
apparent  interest,  though  heavy  at  heart.  Every 
thing  seemed  to  her  so  insignificant.  She  found 
herself  in  a  certain  set  of  circumstances,  and 
though  it  by  no  means  seemed  worth  while  to  try 
to  get  out  of  them  —  as,  indeed,  what  was  there 
desirable  outside? — still,  there  seemed  nothing 
worth  while  where  she  was.  She  marvelled  that 
Tishy  should  feel  concerned  about  the  white 
washing,  or  that  her  father  should  be  particular 
to  have  the  morning  paper,  or  that  Donald  should 
be  in  loud-voiced  grief  because  a  brood  of  chick 
ens,  too  impatient  of  life  to  wait  the  slow  coming 
of  summer-warmth,  had  perished  in  the  cold 
spring  storms.  What  joy  was  there  in  farming,  or 
politics,  or  housekeeping? 

But  a  heavier  blow  was  to  shake  Katherine  out 
of  the  apathy  of  her  grief. 


VII. 

MR.  HAVILAND  had  never  aspired  to  be  a 
rich  man,  but  he  would  have  scorned  to  be  a 
poor  one.  He  was  born  and  bred  of  a  stock  that 
looked  upon  debt  with  horror,  and  counted  inde 
pendence  the  one  necessity  of  life.  He  was  by 
no  means  a  money-making  or  a  money-loving  man. 
He  had  inherited  the  ancestral  farm  with  the 
ancestral  principles  and  the  ancestral  pride.  He 
knew  very  little  about  stocks  or  bonds,  and  dealt 
scarcely  at  all  in  them.  He  made  what  little 
money  he  had  added  to  his  inheritance  by  the 
old-fashioned,  commonplace  methods  —  industry, 
prudence,  thrift  —  a  very  slow  and  ridiculous 
way  of  making  money,  but  still  adhered  to  more 
or  less  in  the  rural  districts.  But  in  this  com 
ical  way  he  had  accumulated  a  modest  for 
tune,  quite  ample  for  his  own  wants,  and  enough 
to  assure  him  of  Katy's  wellbeing  through  life. 
In  an  evil  hour,  in  one  of  those  lapses  from  pru 
dence  to  which  the  wisest  are  subject  —  no,  I 
will  not  say  that,  for  the  wisdom  of  an  act  is  riot 

117 


118  FIRST  LOVE  IS  BEST. 

determined  by  its  event ;  the  highest  wisdom 
may  result  in  disaster.  Rather  let  me  say  that 
Mr.  Haviland,  though  himself  well  content 
with  narrow  ways,  distrustful  of  experiments, 
and  particularly  adverse  to  meddling  with  what 
he  did  not  understand,  was  nevertheless  of  a 
most  kindly  and  obliging  disposition.  One  of 
his  neighbors,  a  farmer  of  ingenuity  and  intelli 
gence,  believed  himself  to  have  discovered  a 
chemical  process  by  which  certain  farm  products 
could  be  so  treated  as  to  become  of  vastly  more 
than  their  ordinary  market  value.  The  process 
was  not  costly,  but  to  make  the  matter  a  business, 
buildings  and  machinery  were  necessary,  and 
Mr.  Haviland  and  one  or  two  others  were  asked 
to  form  a  joint-stock  company,  which,  not  hav 
ing  any  of  the  immunities  of  ordinary  corpora 
tions,  left  each  partner  responsible  for  the  debts 
of  the  whole.  Of  this,  however,  Mr.  Haviland 
was  not  aware. 

He  had  not  much  faith  in  the  project,  but 
rather  from  a  general  lack  of  faith  in  projects 
than  from  any  special  mistrust  of  this.  Indeed, 
if  all  men  were  like  Mr.  Haviland,  enterprise 
would  soon  come  to  a  dead  stop.  But  if  there 
were  not  some  men  like  Mr.  Haviland,  who 
would  foot  the  bills  of  the  enterprising  who  fail  ? 
Mr.  Haviland,  then,  was  not  confident  that  his 
neighbor  had  found  the  philosophers'  stone  in 
his  cornfields  and  orchards ;  but  he  did  not 


A   SENTIMENTAL  SKETCH.  119 

wish  to  be  unsympathetic  and  churlish,  and  as 
the  sum  required  from  him  was  not  large,  not 
so  large  that  its  loss  would  cripple  Katy,  he 
pleased  his  friend  and  himself  by  putting  down 
his  name  and  paying  in  lys  money.  The  first 
year  there  were  no  dividends  because  the  busi 
ness  had  not  been  under  way  long  enough  to  reach 
the  remunerative  point ;  the  second  year,  Mr. 
Haviland  jocosely  promised  Katy,  who  was  then 
at  school,  a  fur  cloak  with  the  proceeds ;  but 
some  mischance  happened  to  the  crops,  and  they 
did  not  harvest  a  fur  cloak.  Then  the  machinery 
moved  on  undisturbed  by  Mr.  Haviland,  and  the 
capital  and  dividends  occupied  his  mind  only 
enough  to  point  an  occasional  rnild  jest.  But 
Fate  was  moving  on  him  from  another  quarter. 

He  and  his  neighbors  shared  the  habit  of 
investing  their  surplus  funds  in  the  county 
treasury  and  the  neighboring  savings-banks, 
contented  with  small  percentage  for  the  sake  of 
greater  security.  But  one  day  a  scheme  arose, 
smiling  rich  promise,  and  the  next  it  swept  the 
land  with  the  besom  of  destruction.  It  was 
a  scheme  of  public  benefit,  in  the  hands  not 
simply  of  honorable  but  of  religious  men.  It 
was  advertised  and  advocated  in  the  religious 
papers.  The  clergy  and  the  church  patronized 
it;  and  men  who  would  have  been  deaf  to  the 
cries  of  "  wild-cat  banks,"  and  who  reckoned 
"  speculation "  as  one  of  the  seven  deadly  sins, 


120  FIRST  LOVE  IS  BEST. 

left  their  county  funds  and  their  savings-banks, 
and  followed  this  golden-mouthed  Chrysostom 
into  the  wilderness. 

But  the  religious  men  blundered,  just  as  if 
they  had  been  worldlings,  and  the  counsels  of 
the  religious  papers  were  brought  to  naught; 
and  just  as  wide-spread  disaster  fell  upon  clergy 
and  churchmen,  farmers,  and  widows  and  or 
phans,  as  if  the  trap  had  been  set  by  scoundrels. 
It  was  a  disaster  that  fell  not  alone,  nor  chiefly, 
upon  men  of  business,  whose  losses  of  to-day 
are  neutralized  by  the  gains  of  to-morrow  ;  to 
whom  loss  means  only  checkmate;  only  a  little 
change  in  their  account-books,  or  at  most  a 
temporary  crippling  of  business.  It  was  a  disas 
ter  that  smote  the  weak  with  an  irretrievable 
blow.  It  went  into  the  country  towns  and  swept 
away  the  hard  earnings  that  could  never  be 
replaced.  It  made  in  many  a  home  the  difference 
between  ease  and  uncertainty,  between  rest  and 
comfort  for  old  age  and  harassing  uncertainty, 
or  a  chilling  and  hopeless  certainty.  It  went 
into  Mr.  Haviland's  house.  It  found  him  a 
healthy  and  happy  man,  content  with  himself, 
at  peace  with  the  world.  It  dealt  the  blow,  and 
left  him  dazed,  smitten,  overwhelmed. 

The  disaster  was  no  direct  fault  of  his  own. 
He  had  invested  no  money  in  the  ruinous  scheme. 
But  the  sudden  collapse  touched  many  other 
affairs.  The  neighbor,  in  the  application  of 


A   SENTIMENTAL  SKETCH.  121 

whose  invention  Mr.  Haviland  had  helped,  was 
an  honest  and  ingenious  man,  but  he  had,  like 
many  other  inventors,  small  business  ability. 
His  affairs  had  been  financially  mismanaged,  and 
the  sudden  pressure  of  the  times  forced  a  stop 
page  and  a  settlement.  Then  the  ruin  began  to 
disclose  itself.  There  had  been  not  only  no 
profit,  but  the  debts,  for  a  rural  village,  were  of 
appalling  magnitude.  Then  the  law  crept  into 
light,  and  showed  the  unsuspected  fact  that  the 
corporation  and  contract  had,  perhaps  unwit 
tingly,  made  each  stockholder  responsible  for  the 
whole  business.  Since  the  firm  had  been  formed 
one  partner  had  died,  and  his  estate  had  been 
divided  and  scattered;  another  found  himself 
involved  and  destroyed  in  the  larger  disaster ; 
the  chief  and  inventor  had  nothing,  and  in  short 
Mr.  Haviland  was  left  to  bear  almost  alone  the 
whole  liability  —  a  liability  before  which  his 
small  but  sufficient  estate  would  disappear. 

The  shock  of  the  loss  was  scarcely  less  than 
the  shock  of  the  surprise.  The  original  occasion 
of  it  was  so  slight  as  to  have  almost  passed  from 
his  memory.  Many  a  time  had  he  good-natured 
ly  lent  money  to  a  needy  neighbor,  and  not 
infrequently  had  this  bread  cast  upon  the  waters 
failed  to  return  even  after  the  lapse  of  many 
days  ;  but  he  had  always  been  scrupulous  never 
to  scatter  insecurely  more  than  he  could  afford 
to  lose,  and  these  small  lapses  had  never  dis- 


122  FIRST  LOVE  IS  BEST. 

turbed  him.  Precisely  this  was  what  he  sup 
posed  himself  to  have  done  in  the  present  case, 
and  he  stood  not  only  appalled  but  confounded. 
In  earlier  years  he  might  have  thrown  it  off, 
though  he  was  never  of  the  temperament  to  rise 
gayly  above  it;  but  whatever  his  possibilities 
might  have  been,  the  time  for  elasticity  and 
conquest  of  circumstances  had  gone  by.  Kate  — 
Kate  —  was  stripped  of  her  possessions,  of  her 
inheritance,  of  her  independence.  Nor  did  the 
proud  man  fail  to  feel  the  wound  in  his  pride.  It 
was  himself  that  had  done  it.  His  own  cherished 
prudence  had  failed  to  discern  the  fatal  flaw. 
His  own  hand  had  robbed  his  beloved  of  the 
ease  and  luxury  and  dignity  of  life.  In  his 
sudden  anguish  he  grew  weak  and  almost  wild. 
He  made  incoherent  statements  to  Katy,  explana 
tions  that  were  half  confessions  and  half  bemoan- 
ings ;  and  Katy,  who  by  no  means  comprehended 
him,  but  who  saw  clearly  and  instantly  that  there 
was  great  loss  and  trouble,  and  that  he  was  in 
mental  confusion  and  distress,  came  up  instantly 
out  of  her  depths,  kissed  him,  fondled  him, 
scolded  him,  and  enveloped  him  with  comfort 
and  consolation.  Money,  money !  what  did  she 
care  for  money  ?  And  in  her  own  temporary 
suspension  of  hope  and  happiness,  she  spoke 
with  more  real  indifference  than  she  might 
otherwise  have  felt,  though,  perhaps,  not  more 
than  she  would  in  any  case  have  assumed. 


A   SENTIMENTAL  SKETCH.  123 

Poor,  indeed !  As  if  she  were  not  fully  able  to 
take  care  of  herself  and  him  too !  Bad,  avari 
cious  man !  Ungrateful,  unnatural  parent !  To 
think  she  minded  anything,  if  only  her  dear, 
sweet,  cross  old  daddy  would  behave  himself, 
and  not  think  she  would  mind  the  loss  of  a  little 
money,  or  a  good  deal  either !  Not  she  !  And 
Katy  hung  about  him,  and  caressed  him,  and 
read  to  him,  and  sung  to  him,  and  soothed  him. 
But  for  all  that  was  the  wound  not  stanched, 
arid  the  yellow  dawn  of  one  peaceful  Sunday 
morning  found  him  stretched  upon  his  couch, 
stricken,  speechless,  unconscious. 

Katherine,  unacquainted  with  illness,  and 
hitherto  unshadowed  by  the  mystery  of  death, 
was  awed  but  incredulous.  This  familiar  and 
beloved  being  had  passed  through  the  portals  of 
a  subtile  and  awful  change.  All  her  heart  and 
soul  and  life  seemed  to  fuse  itself  in  his  with  an 
imperious  and  inextinguishable  sympathy  that 
would  but  could  not  penetrate  his  secret. 
Neighborly  kindness  and  succor  were  uninter- 
mitting,  as  they  always  are  in  our  village  life. 
Mr.  Glynn,  who  from  the  beginning  of  the  per 
plexity  and  danger  had  occupied  himself  almost 
unceasingly  with  Mr.  Haviland's  affairs,  —  to 
whom,  indeed,  the  unhappy  gentleman  had  re 
linquished  them  with  pathetic  hopelessness  and 
helplessness,  — was  unwearied  in  attendance  and 
service.  As  hours  and  days  went  on,  the  as- 


124  FIRST  LOVE  fS  BEST. 

sailed  and  overpowered  soul  struggled  faintly 
back  to  life  and  love.  Into  the  eyes  there  came 
wistfulness,  recognition,  affection ;  and  then, 
alas !  pain  ;  and  Katherine  hushed  her  breaking 
heart,  forced  her  sad  face  into  smiles,  and  softly 
soothed  the  trouble  into  peace.  But  always  the 
pain  came  back.  Only  it  seemed  to  Kate  that 
when  Mr.  Glynn  was  by,  the  eyes  whose  every 
glance  she  noted  rested  upon  him  with  peculiar 
satisfaction,  followed  him  with  interest,  watched 
for  him  sometimes  with  strange  intentness  ;  and 
Katy  told  Mr.  Glynn  her  fancy,  and  he  left  as 
little  as  possible  the  sick  man's  side.  Once, 
when  they  had  been  sitting  long  in  quiet  and 
silence,  thinking  he  slept,  the  dear  eyes  opened 
suddenly,  and  fastened  on  Mr.  Glynn  with  start 
ling  eagerness ;  the  feeble  lips  made  such  earnest 
effort  to  speak,  the  vanishing  mind  strove  so 
forcibly  to  convey  its  wish,  that  both  eager 
watchers  bent  over  him  with  eye  and  ear  alert, 
to  grasp  the  smallest  fragment  of  his  meaning. 
•  "  O,  can't  you  catch  one  word?"  moaned 
Katy,  wringing  her  hands  in  helpless  agony. 

"  Hush,"  said  Mr.  Glynn,  softly  ;  and  then  in 
clear,  tranquil,  assuring  tones  to  the  dying  man : 
"  Katy  ?  yes,  I  will  take  care  of  Katy.  Never 
fear.  I  will  take  every  care  of  Katy  always. 
Trust  me."  The  assent,  the  satisfaction  were  so 
immediate  and  obvious,  that  Kate,  who  thought 
not  of  herself  at  all,  cried,  joyously,  "  O,  dar- 


A   SENTIMENTAL  SKETCH.  125 

ling,  is  it  that  ?  Is  it  only  me  ?  O,  don't  think 
of  me,  dearest,  dearest !  "  Slowly  into  the  pale 
and  beautiful  face  stole  a  look  of  repose,  of 
ineffable  tranquillity,  of  immortal  holiness,  and 
from  the  calm  and  peaceful  sleep  that  followed 
there  was  no  awakening. 

If  sympathy  could  have  lightened  Katherine's 
burden,  that  burden  would  have  been  small  to 
bear ;  for  none  but  sorrowed  with  the  kind, 
happy  young  girl,  motherless  from  infancy,  and 
now  fatherless  and  alone  in  her  desolate  youth. 
And  this  sympathy  found  its  way  to  her  heart, 
and  was  sweet  and-  consoling ;  yet  was  there 
nothing  she  so  much  wanted  as  to  be  alone. 
She  was  so  young,  she  knew  so  little  of  affairs, 
that  she  contemplated  her  situation  only  on  its 
emotional  side.  She  did  not  think  of  the  mate 
rial  change  that  menaced  her.  She  wanted  her 
guests  to  go  when  the  sad  occasion  of  their 
assembling  should  be  past ;  she  wanted  the 
house  to  settle  into  its  old  ways,  that  she  might 
face  her  loss  in  its  worst  aspects,  and  see  what  it 
was  to  be,  with  this  void  that  should  never  be 
filled.  And  while  her  relatives,  friends,  and 
neighbors  were  wondering  what  course  she 

O  O 

would  take,  and  hesitating  what  suggestions  to 
make,  and  fearing  to  seem  rough  and  hard  by 
intruding  business  upon  her  sorrow,  Kate  was 
entirely  unaware  that  there  was  any  cause  for 


126  FIRST  LOVE  IS  BEST. 

suggestion.  Her  nearest  relative  was  her  aunt ; 
and  Mrs.  Ford,  finding  Mr.  Glynn  already  ap 
parently  in  charge  of  affairs,  knowing  him  some 
what  in  his  business  relations,  and  still  more  as 
Mr.  Haviland's  long-time  friend  and  neighbor, 
naturally  took  counsel  with  him,  and  leaned 
upon  him  as  the  nearest  strength,  after  the  man 
ner  of  women.  And,  having  vainly  tried  to 
induce  Kate  to  return  home  with  herself,  not  as 
a  matter  of  necessity,  but  of  sympathy,  Mrs. 
Ford  was  insensibly  persuaded  by  Mr.  Glynn  — 
so  insensibly  that  she  fancied  the  idea  originated 
with  herself  —  that  it  was  not  best  to  obtrude 
any  change  or  suggestion  upon  Kate,  but  to 
leave  her  a  while  to  her  coveted  solitude,  to  the 
tranquillizing  touch  of  time  and  the  healing 
springs  of  youth. 

"  I  would  so  much  rather  take  you  home  with 
me,  dear  Kate ;  but  if  you  really  cannot  bring 
yourself — " 

"  Yes,  dear  aunt  —  " 

"  We  are  leaving  you  only  for  a  little  rest  and 
quiet.  But  our  house  you  must  always  consider 
your  home,  and  I  shall  run  down  again  before 
long." 

"  You  are  so  kind  always,  Aunt  Fanny." 

"  It  is  no  kindness,  Kate ;  it  is  only  the  nat 
ural  order  of  things.  And  you  will  send  for  me 
immediately  if  you  want  anything.  I  should 
be  so  happy  to  take  you  home  with  us." 


A   SENTIMENTAL  SKETCH.  127 

"  O,  no,  aunt." 

"  I  know,  dear.  I  shall  not  urge  it  any  more. 
I  have  no  doubt  it  is  best ;  but  we  cannot  bring 
ourselves  to  be  content  at  leaving  you  here 
alone." 

"  I  shall  really  be  so  much  happier  here  than 
anywhere  else." 

"  So  you  say,  dear ;  and  I  suppose  it  is  so. 
And  there  is  no  hurry." 

"  Hurry  about  what  ?  " 

"  Nothing,  my  dear ;  nothing  at  all.  There  is 
no  hurry  about  arranging  your  future." 

"  I  think  perhaps  that  will  arrange  itself." 

"  Perhaps  so ;  and  at  any  rate  we  shall  not 
help  matters  by  worrying  about  them." 

So  it  came  to  pass  that  Katy  had  her  heart's 
desire,  and  was  left  alone  in  the  deserted  house ; 
and  the  clock  ticked  on  the  stairway  so  loud 
that  it  seemed  to  ring  through  space  ;  and  the 
easy-chair  stood  empty  by  the  south  window; 
and  the  cat  purred  in  the  sunshine  that  moved 
slowly  along  its  old  round  over  the  carpet ;  and 
Tishy's  voice  sounded  strange  in  the  distant 
kitchen  ;  and  the  house  seemed  hopelessly  given 
over  to  the  deafening  resonances  of  silence  and 
the  heart-breaking  order  of  an  ever-present 
absence. 

"  I  could  bear  it  all,"  said  Katherine  to  Mr. 
Glynn,  to  whom  she  could  talk  more  freely  than 
to  others,  because  he  needed  no  explanations ; 


128  FIRST  LOVE  IS  BEST. 

"  I  could  bear  the  separation,  the  being  without 
him,  because  that  is  all  my  own.  It  is  those  last 
days  of  mental  torture.  To  know  that  his  dear, 
good  life  was  clouded  at  the  last — that  I  cannot 
bear." 

"  But  it  was  only  for  a  little.  It  is  all  over. 
And  your  love  never  failed  him,  nor  even  your 
cheerfulness.  I  could  see  how  he  rested  on  that, 
even  at  the  worst." 

"  O,  I  am  afraid  not  even  that." 

"  My  dear  child,  you  cannot  see  clearly  now. 
You  are  tired  and  grieving,  and  you  dwell  on 
regrets.  But  try  to  believe  me.  The  heaviest 
blow  was  softened  to  your  father  when  he  found 
you  unchanged." 

"  But  he  never  could  have  supposed  that  any 
such  thing  could  have  changed  me  towards  him." 

"  No ;  and  he  was  also  too  unselfish  to  care 
less  for  your  loss  than  for  your  reception  of  the 
news  of  loss.  Nevertheless,  I  know  well  how 
your  loving-kindness  and  good  cheer  comforted 
him.  I  assure  you,  Kate,  that  to  me  he  spoke 
of  it  quite  as  much  as  of  this  trouble  which  you 
did  not  mind." 

"  Ah,  but  I  minded  the  other  too  much." 

"  I  think  he  did  not  know  it,"  said  Mr.  Glynn, 
after  a  pause. 

"I  hope  not  —  not  wholly.  But  I  thought 
because  I  was  not  happy,  there  was  no  other 
unbappiriess  but  that.  It  did  not  seem  to  me 


A   SENTIMENTAL  SKETCH.  129 

anything  then,  that  I  had  my  father.     To  think 
of  it  —  that  I  should   not   have   thought   any 
thing  about  that !     And  I  fear  I  was  often  mo 
rose,  at  least  sad.      I  thought  of  myself  more 
than  of  an}^  one  else.     O,  if  I  had  known  that 
papa  was  in  trouble  !  —  if  I  had  known,  if  I  had 
thought   I    could    lose    him   so    soon,  —  how   I 
should  have  thought  of  him  and  no  other !  " 
Vain  regret !  and  old  as  vain. 
9 


VIII. 

KATY,''  said  Mr.  Glynn,  one  day,  apropos  to 
nothing,  "  do  you  remember  a  question  I 
asked  you  long  ago  —  last  year?" 

"A  question?"  said  Katy,  quite  at  a  loss  for 
his  meaning. 

"  A  request  that  you  could  not  grant  —  on  the 
last  drive  we  ever  took  together." 

"  O  !  "  sighed  Kate,  faintly,  and  blushing  a 
deeper  crimson  than  her  cheeks  had  known  for 
many  a  wan  week. 

"  Pray  don't  remember  that,"  she  said,  softly, 
as  Mr.  Glynn  was  silent.  "  Pray  do  not  remem 
ber  it ;  I  do  not." 

"  I  do  not  renew  that  request,  Katy.  I  make 
you  another,  wholly  different.  I  want  you  to 
marry  me." 

"  I  do  not  understand,"  faltered  Katy. 

"  When  I  asked  you  then,  I  thought  I  might 
win  your  love,  but  I  could  not." 

"  I  am  very  grateful  to  you,"  said  Katy,  piti 
fully.  "  I  can  never  tell  you  how  grateful  I  am. 

130 


A  SENTIMENTAL  SKETCH.  131 

You  have  been  the  truest  of  friends.  My  fa 
ther —  "  and  her  voice  failed  her. 

"  I  know  it,"  he  exclaimed,  suddenly  taking 
her  hand,  and  as  suddenly  dropping  it.  "  I 
know.  You  have  been  sweet  and  perfect,  as 
you  always  were.  You  would  have  loved  me  if 
you  could.  As  you  could  not,  you  have  been 
everything  that  was  kind  and  gentle.  I  also 
would  have  kept  from  loving  you  if  I  could. 
No,  not  that,"  he  checked  himself,  smiling,  "I 
would  rather  love  you,  Katy,  hopelessly,  with 
out  return,  than  to  love  triumphantly  an}r  other 
woman  !  "  And  after  a  pause  he  added  :  "  That 
is  an  amusement  not  in  your  books,  —  is  it, 
Kate  ?  " 

Kate  could  on!}7  turn  away  her  eyes  ill  si 
lence. 

"  But,"  he  continued,  "  that  is  not  what  I 
came  to  say.  What  I  wanted  then  was  your 
love.  Without  that  I  could  have  nothing. 
Now  I  want  you.  Katy,  if  you  had  married 
me  then,  I  should  have  stood  in  the  way  of 
your  happiness.  I  should  not  stand  in  the  way 
of  your  happiness  now  ?  " 

u  No.     Because  —  but  —  " 

"  Loving  you  as  I  did,  dear,  I  could  never 
have  been  willing  to  make  you  wretched,  Had 
fate  put  you  into  my  hands,  you  not  consenting, 
I  would  not  have  consented.  But  now  —  " 

"  O,  now  I  am  not  worth  your  taking.     O, 


132  FIRST  LOVE  IS  BEST. 

Mr.  Glynn,  you  know  I  have  no  love  to  give. 
No,  you  do  not  know  how  desolate  I  am." 

"  I  think  I  do  know,  however." 

"  Then  you  could  not  want  me." 

"  But,  Katy,  I  love  you.  That  you  naturally 
forget,  because  you  do  not  love  me." 

"  I  have  a  great  respect  and  —  a  real  liking 
for  you,  Mr.  Glynn." 

"  That  is  right.  That  I  hoped  for,  because 
without  that  we  should  have  little  to  go  on  in 
deed.  This  other  love,  Katy,  you  do  not  count 
on  ?  " 

«  O,  no." 

"  Answer  me,  Katy,  truly,  and  forgive  me,  but 
answer  me  for  the  sake  of  your  father's  friend 
ship.  You  do  not  mean  ever  to  marry  Walter 
Laballe  ?  " 

44  O,  no  ;  never,  never  !  " 

44  And  you  have  no  thought  of  any  other  love  ?  " 

44  How  could  I  ?     No,  no." 

4'  As  a  friend  and  neighbor  you  do  like  me  ? 
I  am  not  disagreeable  to  you?  It  is  not  unpleas 
ant  to  you  to  see  me  and  talk  to  me  ?  " 

"  O,  no  ;  much  more  than  that.  I  am  very 
grateful  to  you.  It  is  more.  Grateful  sounds 
cold,  hard.  My  gratitude  is  very  warm.  I  have 
great  confidence  and  trust  in  you.  But  O,  Mr. 
Glynn,  you.  do  not  want  that.  You  are  too  good 
to  be  put  off  with  that." 

41  Little  Katy,  I  am  not  too  good  to  be  put  off 


A   SENTIMENTAL   SKETCH.  133 

with  anything  you  can  give  me.  If  it  could  have 
been  love  —  but  that  we  will  not  speak  of.  What 
I  want  now,  what  will  make  me  happier  than 
anything  else  can,  is  that  you  should  come  and 
live  with  me,  and  let  me  take  care  of  you.  It  is 
all  that  is  left  me  in  life,  Katy.  It  would  not  be 
robbing  you,  and  it  would  be  giving  me  infinite 
wealth." 

"  But,  Mr.  Glynn,  I  will  be  just  as  good  friends 
and  live  here.  I  will  always  be  your  true,  faith 
ful  friend.  I  will  never  marry  any  one  else,  and 
I  will  never  go  away.  I  should  like  always  to 
live  here.  I  could  be  just  as  much  to  you  here 
as  to  —  change." 

"  No,  Katy,  that  is  not  possible.  There  are 
many  reasons.  Do  not  ask  me  to  give  them,  but 
trust  me.  You  say  you  have  confidence  in  me  — • 
that  it  is  not  possible.  You  must  either  do  this 
one  thing  for  me,  or  you  will  go  away  out  of  this 
house,  out  of  my  life  ;  and  that  I  cannot  bear. 
I  thought  I  had  lost  you  once.  Now  that  you 
have  come  back,  it  would  be  worse  to  lose  you 
than  if  you  had  never  gone.  You  are  tired 
arid  lonely.  You  have  no  heart  to  leave  all  the 
old  life,  and  strike  out  into  new  paths.  You 
would  be  successful  by-and-by,  because  you 
are  young,  and  strong,  and  buoyant.  But  it 
would  be  a  weary  way." 

"  I  have  not  thought  of  it,"  said  Katy,  shrink- 
ingly.  "  I  do  not  want  to  go  away." 


134  FIRST  LOVE  IS  BEST. 

"  No,  you  do  not ;  and  you  shall  not  go  away. 
Come  to  me,  Katy.  I  will  take  the  most  faith 
ful  care  of  you.  I  know  you  better  than  you 
know  yourself — I  have  studied  you  more.  I  will 
be  so  careful  of  you,  dear,  that  you  shall  as  little 
as  possible  miss  what  you  have  lost.  You  shall 
have  just  the  life  you  like  best.  You  shall  be 
wholly  free  and  independent  to  go  your  own  way. 
Remember,  you  lose  nothing,  and  if  there  is  any 
happiness  for  you  in  life,  I  will  find  it  for  you." 

"  But,  O  Mr.  Glynn,  it  would  be  wicked,  and 
base,  and  mean,  and  vile  in  me  to  go  to  you  — 
as  —  I  —  should  have  to  go." 

"  No,  my  —  Katy,  not  with  a  full  and  fair 
understanding.  If  you  should  come  to  me  pre 
tending  to  love  me,  and  I  should  find  afterwards 
that  you  did  not,  that  would  be  fatal.  But  you 
have  never  deceived  me.  You  have  never  been 
otherwise  than  wholly  frank  and  true.  I  know 
what  I  have  to  expect." 

"  But  you  —  you  could  not  be  happy  with  so 
little." 

"  Should  I  be  happier  with  nothing  ?  " 

"  But  suppose  it  should  not  always  be  nothing. 
It  might  be  that  —  that  some  other  —  fate,  some 
other  love  should  come  to  you.  Then  you,  too, 
would  be  wretched,  and  it  would  be  a  horrible 
and  hopeless  sort  of  wretchedness." 

"  Let  me  be  the  judge  of  that; "  and  he  added, 
with  a  quiet  smile,  "  If  you  had  done  me  the 


A  SENTIMENTAL   SKETCH.  135 

honor  to  become  a  little  acquainted  with,  me, 
you  would  know  very  well  that  no  danger  is  to 
be  less  dreaded." 

And  Katy  smiled  too,  in  a  sort  of  hopeless 
recognition  of  the  love  that  was  so  patient,  so 
frank,  alike  in  its  assertion  and  its  abnegation. 

"  Katy,  dear  little  Katy,  you  were  the  dearest 
little  pet  and  plaything  in  the  old  times  —  infi 
nitely  dearer  now.  Do  not  be  afraid  of  me.  I 
will  never  be  hard  or  harsh  with  you,  or  con 
strain  you  in  any  way.  I  will  never  be  dis 
pleased  with  you,  whatever  happens.  I  will  not 
ask  you  what  is  in  your  heart.  That  shall  come 
in  its  own  time.  But  will  you  trust  me  enough 
to  tell  me  whether  you  are  held  by  any,  ever  so 
lingering  a  doubt  whether  you  might  be  barring 
the  way  to  your  own  happiness.  Is  there  still 
in  your  mind  a  hope  that  one  day  a  way  may  be 
open  to  you  for  another  marriage  ?  Do  not  mis 
understand  me.  I  ask  you  out  of  the  very  depths 
of  my  love  and  my  reverence.  Nothing  is  so 
sacred  to  me  as  your  confidence.  O  Katy,  be 
kind  to  me  !  " 

"  Mr.  Glynn,  it  is  all  one  as  if  I  were  dead  ; 
any  marriage  is  impossible.  What  you  want  is 
not  natural.  You  are  very,  very  good  —  but  — 
I  cannot  think  it  would  be  right.  Right  for 
you,  because  —  but  not  right  for  me.  It  would 
be  false  for  me." 

"  Not  false  assuredly.     No  one  is  concerned 


136  FIRST  LOVE  IS  BEST. 

except  you  and  me.  You  shall  not  be  bound  by 
any  promises  that  you  cannot  fulfil.  Listen, 
dear,  would  it  be  unnatural  for  you  to  come  and 
live  with  me  and  let  me  take  care  of  you  if  you 
were  my  sister  ?  " 

"  O,  no.  If  I  could  be  born  again,  and  be  your 
real  sister,  I  would  do  that.  I  would  be  glad  to 
do  that.  That  shows  how  much  I  like  you,  how 
truly  I  like  you." 

"  You  think  your  father  trusted  me  ?  Did  you 
never  think,  dear,  that  your  father  wished  to  in 
trust  you  to  my  care  ?  " 

"  Not  in  this  way.  I  never  thought  that.  I 
do  not  think  he  thought  it.  O,  I  know  he  never 
thought  that ! " 

"  But  if  he  could  have  thought  it,  if  he  could 
know  it  now,  do  you  not  think  he  would  ap 
prove  ?  " 

"  If —  if  it  were  all  right.  He  would  not  wish 
me  to  do  wrong." 

"  Nor  do  I  wish  you  to  do  wrong.  Trust  me 
a  little,  Katy." 

"  I  do  indeed.  I  trust  you  wholly  in  every 
thing  but  this." 

"  Your  father's  wish  would  have  been  in  any 
case  a  sacred  obligation.  But  in  this  case  it  is 
my  dearest  wish  too,  and  my  strongest  hope. 
But  how  can  I  fulfil  it  unless  you  will  come  to 
me  ?  How  can  I  take  care  of  you  unless  you 
will  give  yourself  to  me  ?  Mind,  dear,  I  am  not 


A    SENTIMENTAL  SKETCH.  137 

threatening.  If  you  refuse  me,  I  shall  stay  by 
you  and  keep  Avatch  for  you  all  I  can  ;  but  that 
is  so  little,  and  you  are  alone,  and  you  will  go 
away,  and  I  shall  lose  you.  O  Katy,  come  to 
me  and  let  me  fulfil  the  promise  that  gave  your 
father  peace  !  " 

"  But  let  me  live  here.  I  will  do  everything 
as  you  wish  if  you  will  only  let  me  stay  here 
and  not  be  married." 

"  O,  my  dear,  you  must  be  married,  of  course  I 
That  is  a  little  ceremony  quite  indispensable. 
But  that  need  riot  frighten  you.  Just  let  me 
come  over  quietly  some  morning  and  take  you 
home  with  me.  Do  not  fancy  you  will  be  en 
slaved  by  it.  I  will  not  even  weary  and  worry 
you  with  my  love.  I  will  not.  Did  I  not  keep 
my  promise  before  ?  Did  I  not,  Katy  ?  Speak 
to  me." 

"  I  suppose  so,"  faltered  Kate,  not  in  the  least 
remembering  any  promise  given  or  taken. 

"  It  shall  be  so  in  the  future.  I  give  you  my 
word.  Do  not  vex  yourself  with  fancies.  Think 
of  me  as  your  best  friend.  You  can  let  me  be 
that.  You  shall  have  no  duties  only  such  as 
you  choose.  I  will  impose  nothing  on  you." 

"Mr.  Glynn,  I  do  not  know  how  to  answer 
you.  I  cannot  do  it ;  I  cannot  accept  it.  My 
father  will  know.  You  are  good  and  generous 
and  kind  ;  I  feel  that.  I  do  not  know  what  to 
say  ;  but  I  cannot  do  it." 


138  FIRST  LOVE  IS  BEST. 

"  But  you  can  do  it,  Katy.  This  is  just  what 
you  can  do.  I  do  not  ask  the  impossible.  Hear 
me,  Katy.  I  am  not  used  to  ask  favors ;  but 
see  —  to  you  I  beg,  I  plead.  Katy,  Katy,  my  life 
is  in  this ;  all  that  I  ever  wanted  in  all  my  life  is 
this." 

"  But  I  must  save  you.  You  do  not  know 
what  you  are  asking.  I  should  be  taking  all, 
and  giving  nothing.  You  do  not  know  what  a 
forlorn  and  spiritless  ghost  I  am  of  the  girl  I  once 
was,  of  the  girl  you  knew.  O,  Mr.  Glynn,  please 
go  —  please  let  me  go  !  You  are  good  and  true  ; 
I  thank  you  from  my  heart ;  but  you  do  not 
know  what  you  are  asking.  I  will  save  you 
from  your  own  generosity." 

"  I  know  perfectly  well  what  I  am  doing,  and 
I  am  not  at  all  generous.  Good  heavens,  Katy, 
look  at  it !  Here,"  —  he  grasped  her  hands  and 
drew  her  nearer  to  him,  —  "here  is  everything 
in  the  world  that  I  love.  Without  you,  the  world 
is  empty  to  me.  What  I  want  is  you,  in  my 
house,  before  my  eyes.  You,  unhappy,  that  I 
may  console  you  ;  alone,  that  I  may  take  care  of 
you.  Think  of  that  supreme  happiness — when  I 
thought  you  were  gone  from  me  forever.  Did  I 
dream  of  this  ?  There  seemed  no  way  open  to 
me  ;  riot  a  ray  of  light.  And  now  my  happi 
ness  will  not  diminish  yours.  Perhaps  it  may 
bring  something  of  yours  back.  Darling,  I  am 
not  thinking  of  }'ou  at  all.  I  forget  your  poor 


A   SENTIMENTAL  SKETCH.  139 

little  broken  heart.  I  only  think  of  the  great 
joy  coming  to  me,  to  live  with  you,  and  see  you 
my  care,  my  charge  —  to  love  you,  Katy,  to  lav 
ish  all  my  life  on  you.  Katy,  say  that  this  shall 
be!" 

"  But  I  have  nothing  to  give  you  in  return," 
gasped  Katy. 

"  Give  me  the  opportunity.  It  is  all  I  ask ; 
nothing  more.  Be  at  peace,  my  dearest.  I  love 
you  wholly.  I  ask  nothing  from  you.  You  shall 
settle  it  all  with  your  own  heart  at  your  leisure. 
Just  to  live  for  you,  with  you,  is  —  is  my  heaven, 
Katy!" 

"  But  tell  me  !  "  cried  Kate,  earnestly.  "  O, 
please  be  careful !  Do  not  let  me  destroy  you. 
You  think  you  will  be  content.  But  are  you  not 
deceiving  yourself  ?  Is  there  not  in  your  heart  a 
thought  that  I  shall  one  day  change  ?  When  the 
days  and  the  years  go  by,  and  the  Katy  of  old 
never  comes  back  again,  and  there  is  only  a 
colorless  woman  in  her  place,  with  a  pallid  mind 
and  a  dull,  dead  heart,  and  all  the  spring  and 
vigor  gone  out  of  her,  then  will  you  not  be  dis 
mayed  and  disgusted  ?  Then  even  in  the  grave 
where  I  live  I  shall  feel  another  pain  of  death. 
Tell  me  if  you  really  look  this  in  the  face  and 
accept  it  ?  You  are  thinking  that  some  day  I 
will  change  ;  but  I  cannot  change."  And  Kate's 
voice  was  shrill  and  tremulous  with  excitement. 
Ah !  it  was  not  the  voice  of  the  dead.  Out  of 


140  FIRST  LOVE  IS  BEST. 

no  grave  of  feeling  came  that  eager,  wailing  cry ! 
And  her  innocent,  searching  eyes  pierced  deeper 
than  they  knew.  Again  his  swart  face  flushed 
unseen  as  a  gentle  hand  unwittingly  touched  the 
heart's  hidden  secret,  revealing  it  thus  first,  per 
haps,  to  the  slower  mind.  The  flush  and  throb 
passed  swiftly  by. 

"  Katy,"  he  said,  looking  honestly  into  her  hon 
est  eyes,  "  who  can  tell  ?  Perhaps  I  do  think 
that  my  love  may  win  to  your  heart  in  time.  I  do 
not  know.  Perhaps  if  you  do  not  hate  me  at  the 
beginning,  it  may  be  that  I  have  a  hidden  hope 
that  a  little  love  will  come  to  me  by-and-b}%  But 
I  assure  you,  Katy,  it  is  not  that  which  moves 
me.  I  put  that  out  of  sight.  I  am  sure  of  your 
kindness,  of  your  sweetness,  of  your  friendliness. 
And  to  breathe  in  always  that  kind,  sweet  friend 
liness  from  the  eyes  I  love,  and  the  heart  I  love, 
when  I  thought  I  was  doomed  to  utter  dreari 
ness  !  O  Katy,  Katy,  how  can  I  show  you  what 
love  is  ! " 

"  I  wish  I  had  loved  you,"  cried  Kate,  ingen 
uously.  "I  wish  it  had  been  you  that  I  loved." 

"  But  since  it  was  not,  let  it  be  me  that  you 
will  bless.  I  would  not  ask  this  if  it  were  not 
for  that  other  love.  I  should  not  dare  —  I  should 
not  know  to  what  fate,  from  what  future,  you 
might  presently  find  yourself  bound.  But  now 
I  think  I  do  know,  and  I  dare.  Have  no  mis 
givings,  Katy.  If  I  knew  surely  that  you  would 


A   SENTIMENTAL  SKETCH.  141 

never  look  at  me  with  other  eyes  than  now,  if 
you  should  surely  never  have  another  shade  of 
tenderness  in  your  heart,  it  would  be  all  the 
same.  If  you  lay  before  me  helpless,  wrecked, 
with  only  the  breath  of  life  on  your  lips,  it  would 
still  be  the  same.  It  would  be  my  dearest  joy  to 
serve  you,  to  cherish  you,  even  if  you  did  not  see 
my  hand  or  know  my  voice.  What  will  it  be 
with  your  dear  eyes  looking  upon  me  —  clear,  if 
sad  ?  Your  heart  is  heavy ;  but  I  shall  know 
that  it  answers  me.  Do  you  not  see  that  I  am 
wholly  self-seeking  ?  " 

"  But  if  I  cannot  be  true  to  you  ?  If  I  can 
not  wholly  cut  myself  off  from  the  past,  even 
though  the  past  must  be  outwardly  as  if  it  had 
never  been  ?  " 

"  Dearest,  for  name  and  fame  I  lay  my  honor 
in  your  sweet  hands,  and  it  shall  bind  me  to  their 
sweetness  and  sanctity.  For  happiness,  for  tran 
quillity  even,  I  am  content  to  wait  —  for  yours. 
Mine  is  already  assured. 

"  But,"  he  added,  hastily,  "  I  put  no  check,  no 
guard,  upon  you  in  word  or  thought.  You  shall 
not  be  true  to  me  by  rule.  You  shall  not  curb 
your  heart.  If  you  think  of — that  other,  you 
shall  not  feel  you  are  wronging  me.  Think  of 
him  all  you  must.  For  your  own  sake  I  shall 
wish  it  otherwise  ;  but  you  shall  not  bend  your 
thoughts  to  my  pleasure.  I  will  not  be  your  ty 
rant.  Katy,  how  can  I  make  you  see  that  it  is 


142  FIRST  LOVE  IS  BEST. 

not  to  imprisonment  I  urge  you,  but  to  the  largest 
liberty?  —  only  to  protection  and  care  that  I  can 
not  give  you  here  ?  Grant  me  this,  Katy,  which 
you  can,  which  you  surely  can,  and  out  of  the 
wreck  which  menaced  both  our  lives  you  will 
have  saved  me  something  most  precious." 

Beaten  down  by  her  own  griefs,  disappointed 
of  her  young  dreams,  uncertain  and  despairing 
of  herself,  overborne  by  his  unsuspected  impet 
uosity,  with  no  words  or  strength  to  withstand 
him  longer,  yet  with  the  instinct  not  to  yield, 
Katherine  looked  up  into  his  eyes,  silent,  implor 
ing  she  knew  not  what.  And  as  he  met  that 
upturned  face,  so  innocent,  so  sorrowful,  so  ap 
pealing,  a  sudden  passion  seized  him,  a  sudden 
flame  leaped  along  his  veins,  a  sudden  wrath 
against  the  fate  that  had  barred  her  from  him,  a 
sudden  frenzy  of  will  to  grasp  and  gain  her.  In 
an  instant  he  had  swept  aside  all  pleading.  He 
gathered  her  in  his  strong  arm,  he  crushed  the 
soft  hands  to  his  breast,  his  flaming  eyes  held 
her.  "  Katy  !  "  he  cried,  "  I  will  no  longer  ask 
you.  I  will  take  it  into  my  own  hands.  You 
shall  come  to  me.  You  are  mine.  You  belong 
to  me.  You  are  mine  —  mine  —  mine  —  from 
the  beginning.  Kiss  me,  my  own.  I  will  not 
ask  it  again ;  but  this  once  —  this  once  for  a  seal, 
for  a  pledge  that  I  am  come  to  my  own."  And 
he  bent  to  her  troubled  brow,  he  pressed  close 
the  drooping  eyes,  he  touched  the  trembling  lips 


A   SENTIMENTAL  SKETCH.  143 

with  long  caress,  as  if  the  repressed  passion  of  his 
life  should  pass  into  her  soul  in  that  one  slow, 
sweet  moment.  And  as  Katy,  pale,  panting, 
powerless,  sank  to  the  storm  that  swept  over  her, 
as  she  felt  herself  held  in  that  iron  clasp,  felt 
the  smothered  fire  of  his  burning  eyes,  and  the 
firm  lips'  compelling  tenderness,  some  wild,  new 
thrill  quivered  through  heart  and  soul  and  spirit, 
and  she  was  suddenly  aware  that  this  man  had 
forced  in  from  the  outer  darkness  of  indifference 
where  he  was  wont  to  dwell,  across  the  line  of 
complaisant  liking  or  calm,  instinctive  dismissal, 
in  to  her  own  warm  world.  It  was  not  love,  but 
it  was  recognition.  It  was  no  lesson  learned,  it 
was  an  illumination. 


IX. 

SO  then  Mr.  Glynn  having  snatched  victory  in 
high-handed  fashion,  carried  it  with  a  high 
hand.  He  knew  well  that  if  he  would  secure 
the  momentary  conquest  he  had  gained,  he  must 
make  sure  of  Katherine  while  she  was  yet  in  the 
trough  of  the  sea.  Once  riding  the  waves  again, 
stanch  and  sound,  with  sails  set  and  colors  fly 
ing,  she  would  slip  away  from  him  over  unknown 
seas.  It  would  have  been  wise  and  prudent  for 
him  to  reflect  whether  wooing  and  winning  in 
this  Sabine  fashion  were  safe  and  suitable  in  our 
day,  —  whether  a  reluctant  will,  overborne  in 
weakness,  would  not  rise  again  with  returning 
strength,  not  only  to  reluctance  but  repulsion. 
But  Mr.  Glynn,  moderate  and  cautious  in  the 
ordinary  affairs  of  life,  in  this  most  vital  affair 
of  all  was  neither  cautious  nor  moderate.  He 
took  counsel  neither  of  prudence  nor  wisdom. 
He  was  a  man.  He  was  bent  on  the  one  sole 
purpose,  to  get  possession  of  this  woman,  to  have 

144 


A   SENTIMENTAL  SKETCH.  145 

her  within  his  reach,  to  hold  her  in  his  power. 
It  is  true  that  he  meant  everything  that  was  high 
and  honorable  by  her.  He  would  bear  himself 
chivalrously  towards  her.  But,  had  it  not  been 
his  own  love  that  was  in  question,  he  would 
have  seen  how  little  that  detracted  from  the  risk. 
But  it  was  love  that  impelled  him,  and  he  tram 
pled  under  foot  all  doubt,  all  hazard.  He  did 
not  pause  to  consider  what  fatal  consequences 
might  result  to  himself  or  to  Katy  should  heart 
and  soul  and  will  awake  from  their  temporary 
trance  to  find  that  tranquil  liking,  too  hard 
pressed  into  unnatural  service,  had  changed  into 
irrepressible  distaste.  He  never  faltered  at 
thought  of  what  would  come  should  all  his  hope 
crumble,  and,  availing  himself  of  her  depression 
and  despair  to  secure  her  passive  acquiescence, 
he  should  fail  to  possess  himself  of  his  ultimate 
object,  her  inward  and  spiritual  allegiance. 

He  was  a  man,  and  he  resolutely  refused  to 
be  hampered  by  any  secondary  consideration. 
He  loved  Katy;  he  wanted  her,  and  he  would 
have  her.  He  sincerely  believed  —  let  it  be 
said  for  his  extenuation  —  that  he  could  secure 
her  happiness.  She  had  followed  her  own  path, 
.  and  stumbled,  and  been  sorely  bruised.  He 
believed  he  could  have  prevented  that  if  she 
would  have  permitted;  and  he  believed  that 
now  he  could  take  her  and  heal  her  and  hold 
her  up.  At  anv  rate  he  could  take  her !  And 

id 


146  FIRST  LOVE  IS  BEST. 

he  looked  neither  to  the  rig]  it  hand  nor  to  the 
left  till  his  purpose  was  accomplished. 

Mrs.  Ford  was  instantly  summoned,  and  to 
that  excellent  lady,  who  could  neither  bring 
herself  to  burial  with  Katy  in  the  country,  nor 
coax  Katy  away  to  her  own  city  home,  and  who 
was  in  sore  perplexity  over  her  much-loved  and 
not  quite  comprehended  niece,  Richard  Glynn 
seemed  the  angel  of  the  Lord  sent  from  Heaven 
for  her  deliverance.  Although  her  own  mar 
riage  had  been  very  far  from  an  ideal  one,  none 
the  less  did  this  devout  believer  in  the  existing 
order  of  things  count  marriage  the  one  gateway 
to  female  dignity,  the  sole  path  in  which  life 
could  move  forward  with  decorum  and  cohe 
rence.  Partly  in  thoughtlessness  and  partly  in 
misliking  for  such  speech,  and  partly  in  the  rush 
of  events,  Katherine  had  never  told  her  aunt  of 
the  sundering  of  her  engagement  to  Walter  La- 
balle,  though  a  tolerably  certain  suspicion  of  the 
true  state  of  things  had  crept  into  the  lady's 
mind.  Nor  was  she  by  any  means  sorry ;  for, 
though  she  liked  the  young  man  well  enough,  she 
had  not  been  able  to  discover  that  he  possessed 
those  solid  charms  which  could  never  claim  her 
approval  alone,  yet  without  which  all  others 
would  have  been  equally  vain.  She  would  have 
been  very  much  and  very  justly  shocked  to  have 
been  called  mercenary,  or  to  have  supposed  her 
self  willing  to  assist  in  a  marriage  of  convenience 


A  SENTIMENTAL  SKETCH.  147 

for  her  niece.  Only  if  she  could  have  seen  in 
black  and  white  a  convincing  evidence  that 
Walter  Laballe  had,  either  in  possession  or  in 
fair  prospect,  a  handsome  and  well-established 
income,  she  would  have  been  inclined  to  pass 
over  any  little  traits  of  instability,  or  even  in 
ability,  as  belonging  to  his  years  and  desultory 
life,  and  altogether  likely  to  yield  to  the  exigen 
cies  of  his  profession  and  the  serious  responsi 
bilities  of  married  life.  She  certainly  would 
not  have  descended  upon  Kate  to  find  the  en 
gagement  off  and  a  marriage  with  a  questionable 
income  immediately  impending,  without  making 
the  most  vigorous  efforts  to  stem  so  disastrous 
a  tide.  But  to  find  this  doubtful  affair  closed, 
and  Kate  claimed  by  a  man  of  high  standing 
and  ample  wealth  —  the  good  lady  folded  her 
hands  in  pious  resignation,  devoutly  thanked 
Providence  for  uncovenanted  mercies,  and  felt 
that  her  cup  was  running  over. 

That  Katherine  should  be  quiet,  undemon 
strative,  even  uninterested,  seemed  to  Mrs. 
Ford  but  natural.  That  she  should  be  indif 
ferent  to  so  admirable  a  marriage,  that  she 
should  have  anything  to  oppose  to  so  perfect 
an  arrangement  of  all  her  difficulties,  that  —  let 
us  be  just  —  Kate  could  for  a  moment  contem 
plate  a  marriage  in  which  her  heart  was  not 
enlisted,  Mrs.  Ford  could  not  suspect,  would 
not  have  admitted  to  herself  if  she  had  sus- 


148  FIRST  LOVE  SS  BEST. 

pected  it.  Mr.  Glynn  saved  Katy  the  trouble 
of  explanation,  and  Mrs.  Ford  the  perplexity  of 
surmises.  He  made  known  to  her  all  of  the  sit 
uation  that  it  was  proper  so  near  a  relative  and 
so  warm  a  friend  should  know,  and  thus  seen, 
the  situation  commended  itself  entirely  to  Mrs. 
Ford's  reason  and  approval.  The  intimacy  of 
the  families  was  sufficiently  significant  of  the 
satisfaction  with  which  Mr.  Haviland  would 
have  greeted  such  a  marriage.  Kate's  loneliness 
and  the  condition  of  her  affairs  were  ample  rea 
sons  for  the  apparent  precipitancy.  Mr.  Glynn's 
assurances  to  Mrs.  Ford  were  calculated  to  sat 
isfy  and  gratify  the  most  devoted  mother.  And 
in  short  it  came  to  pass  that,  compassionate, 
dutiful,  bewildered,  and  sore  beset,  Katherine 
found  herself  in  that  most  immoral  of  all  posi 
tions,  the  position  of  an  unloving  wife,  yet  did 
not  deem  herself  degraded  and  did  not  feel  her 
self  debased. 

For  weeks  after  her  marriage  Kat}-  was  like  a 
flower  beaten  down  untimely  by  an  untimely 
storm.  The  long-continued  sorrow  and  fatigue 
to  which  she  was  wholly  unused  culminated  in  a 
low,  slow  fever  which  seized  her  impalpably,  but 
held  her  fast  in  its  languid  yet  deadly  clutch, 
and  Katy  looked  for  an  easy  path  out  of  all  her 
confusion  through  the  gradual  slipping  away  of 
life.  Mr.  Glynn  was  even  more  alarmed  than 
Kate,  who,  for  that  matter,  was  not  alarmed  at 


A  SENTIMENTAL  SKETCH.  149 

all.  Unversed  in  feminine  ways,  Katherine 
seemed  to  him  so  small,  so  fragile,  so  unable  to 
cope  with  illness,  that  he  felt  his  hold  upon  her 
loosening,  and  had,  too  late,  a  terrible  misgiving 
as  to  whether  his  own  inexorable  insistence 
might  not  have  helped  to  lay  her  low.  But  Doc 
tor  Blount,  who  was  familiar  with  every  droop 
and  drag  of  ailing  womanhood,  who  had  known 
Kate  from  a  very  early  period  in  her  life,  who 
saw  Mr.  Glynn's  misery  but  did  not  see  all  its 
cause,  and  laid  it  only  to  the  account  of  his 
over-anxious  love,  —  Doctor  Blount  laughed  his 
fears  to  scorn,  assured  him  that  it  was  but  the 
natural  reaction  from  her  great  excitement  and 
grief;  that  Kate  was  a  sensible  girl,  and  knew 
what  she  was  about,  and  was  doing  the  best 
thing  possible  under  the  circumstances,  namely, 
lying  by;  that  when  this  enforced  rest  had 
brought  about  the  desired  equilibrium  she  would 
be  all  right  again  ;  that  as  for  Kate  being  del 
icate  —  bah!  the  thing  was  absurd !  She  was  as 
strong  as  her  husband,  and  likely  to  live  as 
long  —  and  longer  if  he  could  not  keep  a  stiff 
upper  lip.  He  knew  her  stock,  and  could  take 
out  a  life-insurance  on  Kate  any  day.  She  was 
as  sound  as  a  nut.  There  was  not  an  infirm 
fibre  in  her.  Good  G-ad,  Glynn,  every  man  has 
his  price,  and  it  took  a  wife,  it  seems,  to  show 
what  an  uncommon  fool  you  are.  And  in  all 
those  anxious  weeks  nothing  was  so  cheering  to 


150  FIRST  LOVE  IS  BEST. 

the  poor  man  as  the  doctor's  unmeasured  abuse. 
And  presently,  sure  enough,  Katy  honored  the 
good  doctor's  faith,  and  was  herself  infinitely 
surprised  to  perceive  that  not  only  was  vigor 
slowly  surging  back  into  her  veins,  but  the  elas 
ticity  of  life  into  her  heart.  She  began  to  feel 
that  the  years  which  could  not  bring  her  satis 
faction  might  bring  tranquillity  ;  that  though 
she  might  find  little  to  enjoy,  there  might  be 
much  to  do.  And  then  she  went  even  further, 
and  fancied  that,  though  she  might  never  meas 
ure  the  heights  and  depths  of  happiness,  she 
might  walk  in  serene  peace  on  the  table-lands. 
And  as  for  this  friend  of  her  father,  —  this 
friend  of  her  own  as  she  could  not  choose  but 
consider  him,  though  she  could  not  bring  her 
self  to  call  him  husband  even  in  her  thought,  — 
coming  out  of  the  far-off,  listless  atmosphere 
of  illness  into  the  clear  light  of  health,  she 
felt  towards  him  the  moving  of  a  strong,  com 
passionate  gratitude.  She  could  not  love  him. 
Her  love  had  gone  from  her  past  recall.  Her 
power  to  love  was  exhausted.  Power  to  love 
him  had  never  existed.  This  was  fate,  and  no 
wish  could  change  it.  There  was  no  room  for 
duty  here.  But  this  man  who  claimed  nothing 
from  her,  who  with  all  his  importunity  had 
sought  only  the  opportunity  to  bestow,  seemed 
to  her  worthy  of  exertion  to  a  cheerful  and 
helpful  life.  All  the  love  she  had  lavished  had 


A    SENTIMENTAL  SKETCH,  151 

brought  her  110  return.  If  his  must  be  alike 
wasted,  it  should  at  least  not  be  wasted  on  self 
ishness  and  self-indulgence.  Through  her  illness 
she  had  only  vague  recollections  of  a  kindly 
face,  of  words  inexpressibly  gentle  and  reas 
suring,  of  loth  and  lingering  withdrawals.  But 
as  she  climbed  slowly  back  to  health,  and  as 
with  health  came  observation,  reflection,  and 
renewal  of  interest  in  all  outward  objects,  Kate 
saw  not  only  how  constant  and  watchful  he  was, 
but  how  solitary  and  self-contained.  Her  own 
home  had  been  full  of  sunshine  and  companion 
ship.  Everywhere  was  friendliness,  equality, 
confidence.  Her  father  had  not  been  a  man  to 
be  formally  feared  or  obeyed  or  respected,  but 
to  be  loved  and  fondled  and  made  much  of,  to 
be  teased  and  confided  in  and  first  considered, 
not  from  duty  but  instinct.  Tishy  was  no  ser 
vant,  but  sovereign  in  her  own  right,  worship 
ping  Katy,  and  tyrannizing  over  her,  and  re 
joicing  beyond  measure  in  every  good  thing  that 
befell  her.  From  that  house  to  this  the  transi 
tion  was  but  gloomy.  Even  Tishy,  who  came 
up  often  to  tend  her,  looked  strange,  sat  about 
forlorn,  and  was  evidently  ill  at  ease.  Mrs.  Pal- 
ker,  the  housekeeper,  Kate  fancied,  looked  at 
her  as  if  she  were  a  curiosity,  and  poured  out 
volumes  of  confidence,  which  tired  Kate  inex 
pressibly.  In  the  house  was  too  much  stateli- 


152  FIRST  LOVE  IS  BEST. 

ness  and  too  little  sunshine,  and  Kate,  home-sick 
and  heart-sick,  shed  some  bitter  tears,  unseen,  for 
herself ;  and  then  went  back  over  the  lonely  life 
that  Mr.  Glynn  must  have  led,  and  cried  again 
for  him ;  and  then  suddenly  thought  with  a  pang 
of  something  like  horror  that  she  was  his  wife, 
that  she  was  married,  that  all  her  hopes  and  im 
aginings  had  ended  in  this  —  his  wife,  his  wife, 
his  wife,  —  forever  and  forever;  there  was  no 
way  out ;  all  the  dreadful,  eternal  future  shut 
her  in  against  this  blank  wall.  And  if  there 
were  a  way  out,  if  she  were  herself  outside, 
what  then  ?  Would  the  grave  give  back  its 
dead?  "Would  she  find  life  other  than  she  had 
left  it?  If  she  had  not  been  borne  hither, 
would  she  have  found  herself  still  in  her  home 
of  sunshine,  full-fed  with  hope  and  love,  buoy 
ant,  unstricken  ?  Katy  uttered  an  inarticulate 
cry  to  Heaven,  and  if  in  it  were  mingled  some 
unspoken  invocation  to  the  saints,  some  instinc 
tive,  dumb  appeal  to  the  father  so  lately  lost,  to 
the  mother  never  known,  why,  Heaven  I  think 
is  not  jealous  of  such  prayer,  and  not  for  that 
should  Katy  forswear  her  firm  Protestant  faith  ; 
and  then  —  for  Katy's  moods  and  tenses  fol 
lowed  close  upon  each  other's  heels  —  a  swift 
thought  came  to  her,  and  she  looked  at  the 
clock,  and  dried  her  eyes,  and  put  up  her  hair, 
and  put  on  a  gown,  and  adorned  herself,  and 


A   SENTIMENTAL  SKETCH. 


153 


went  down  stairs  with  heart  throbbing  and  ears 
ringing,  not  daring  to  hesitate,  knowing  she 
should  not  have  the  courage  to  conquer  hesita 
tion.  And  even  with  her  hand  on  the  door-knob 
of  the  dining-room,  her  courage  gave  way,  and 
she  shrank  back  trembling. 


X. 

BUT  somehow,  whether  through  the  diaboli 
cal  acuteness  of  love,  Heaven  knows  —  if 
Heaven  will  pardon  the  collocation  —  that  irreso 
lute  feeble  fumbling  at  the  door  reached  the  ears 
of  Mr.  Glynn,  who  was  about  taking  his  seat 
at  his  solitary  dinner-table.  He  came  quickly  to 
the  door,  opened  it  with  an  eager,  expectant 
look,  which,  on  seeing  Kate,  changed  swiftly 
into  such  gladness  of  surprise  and  gratification 
as  smote  her  like  a  reproach.  He  drew  her  into 
the  room,  and  stood  for  a  moment  holding  her 
two  hands,  intent,  battling  valiantly  with  the 
impulse  to  shiver  all  his  promises,  and  had  grace 
given  him  to  conquer  and  be  wise  —  let  us  not 
say  honest  —  and  speak  lightly  to  Kate,  who  had 
too  much  ado  to  keep  herself  well  in  hand  to  be 
very  observant  of  him. 

"  It  is  not  possible  that  you  have  really  come 
to  dine  with  me,  Kate  ?  " 

"  Then,  perhaps,  to  give  you  your  dinner,  if 
you  like." 

154 


A   SENTIMENTAL  SKETCH.  155 

"  If  I  like  !  If  I  adore !  But,  dear,  how  you 
tremble  !  You  are  cold." 

"  No  indeed,  I  am  not  cold,  not  at  all.  It  is 
only  the  —  the  coming  down  stairs.  I  have  not 
been  down  before." 

"  And  you  are  weak.  You  should  not  have 
attempted  it  alone.  That  was  very  imprudent. 
I  was  so  glad  to  see  you  that  I  forgot  to  scold. 
Will  you  consider  yourself  scolded  ?  Will  you 
send  for  me  and  let  me  bring  you  down  the  next 
time  ?  " 

"  O,  there  is  no  need.  I  am  quite  strong.  It 
was  not  that  alone,  but  —  coming  here  and  — 
all." 

"  And  feeling  that  I  should  certainly  eat  you 
up.  Confess,  Katy.  I  confess  that  I  should 
like  to." 

"  I  should  certainly  disagree  with  you,"  said 
Kate,  grasping  out  feebly  after  Sydney  Smith's 
baked  missionary,  by  way  of  support. 

"  Don't  mind  manners,  Katy.  Especially  don't 
mind  or  mend  mine.  I  must  stare  at  you.  I  was 
hungering  and  thirsting  for  you,  and  it  was 
angelic  in  you  to  come  down  of  your  own 
accord." 

"  I  suppose  angels  always  come  down  of  their 
own  accord  when  they  come  at  all,"  said  Kate, 
demurely. 

"  I  know  one  angel  who  did  not  come  down  to 
this  house  of  her  own  accord,  and  for  a  while  I 


156  FIRST  LOVE  IS  BEST. 

surely  thought  she  would  spread  her  wings  and 
glide  away  after  I  had  got  her  here.  But  you 
won't  now,  will  you,  Kate  ?  Promise  me  you  will 
not  be  so  cruel  and  inconsiderate  as  to  fall  ill 
again." 

"  Not  if  you  are  good  to  me,"  said  Kate,  smil 
ing. 

"Good?  Just  wait  and  see.  But  get  well 
while  you  are  waiting." 

"•  But  I  am  well  now,  quite  well." 

"  Yes,  to  be  sure.  You  are  so  well  that  you 
are  almost  dangerous.  But  come,  this  is  giving 
you  the  cold  shoulder  for  your  first  dinner,  which 
is  not  hospitable.  Now,  what  shall  we  eat  and 
what  shall  we  drink  ?  Katy,  why  did  you  not 
tell  me  you  were  coming,  that  I  might  kill  the 
fatted  calf  ?  " 

"  I  was  not  coming  till  the  moment  I  thought 
of  it.  But  it  does  not  signify.  I  am  not  a  very 
prodigal  son." 

"  Was  not  that  an  unlucky  figure  ?  You 
must  lay  it  to  the  account  of  a  general  mental 
perturbation.  See  here,  Katy,  I  fear  I  don't 
know  how  to  keep  house  for  a  lady." 

"  And  I  am  sure  I  don't  know  how  to  keep 
house  for  a  gentleman  ;  so  we  are  even  there." 

"  But  you,"  said  Mr.  Glynn,  "  you  don't  have 
to  do  it  while  I  —  here  I  am  —  and  very  much 
afraid  of  you,  Katy.  I  am  indeed.  If  I  only 
had  the  knack  of  trembling,  you  would  hear  the 


A   SENTIMENTAL  SKETCH.  157 

very  spoons  rattle.  Tell  me,  Kate,  is  this  a  nice 
table  to  ask  you  to  sit  down  to  or  not  ?  " 

"  Indeed,"  said  Kate,  laughing,  "  it  is  a  nice 
enough  table,  but  —  if  I  can't  tell  a  lie  —  I  think 
I  could  do  better." 

"  Bless  your  heart,  so  you  shall  —  turn  and 
overturn,  as  the  good  parson  asks  the  good  God 
to  do  at  five  minutes  before  eleven  every  Sunday 
morning.  And  I  remember  that  you  are  a  wor 
shipper  of  idols  —  graven  images,  and  table- 
tackling  in  particular.  You  will  have  a  wide  field 
for  operations  in  this  house.  But  first  you  must 
eat.  Shall  it  be  here  ?  "  he  added  gently,  indi 
cating  the  seat  of  honor  at  the  head  of  the 
table. 

"Just  as  you  please,"  said  Kate,  growing 
tremulous  again. 

"  Then  you  shall  be  an  invalid  still,  and  sit  by 
me  and  be  dictated  to.  And  a  well-ordered 
dinner-party  we  shall  be  ;  for  you  being  a  con 
valescent  ought  to  be  hungry,  and  will  naturally 
eat  when  you  have  nothing  to  say,  and  I  who 
have  been  hard  at  work  all  day  am  ditto,  and  so 
willing  to  listen  between  whiles.  Whereas  if  we 
were  both  determined  to  talk  all  the  time,  how 
sad  it  would  be  !  " 

Poor  Kate  felt  that  she  would  be  more  than 
willing  to  give  up  her  share  of  the  conversation, 
but  she  did  not  say  so.  She  had  come  down 
determined  to  put  her  own  self  aside  and  to 


158  FIRST  LOVE  IS  BEST. 

pleasure  him,  not  at  all  virtuously,  but  for  self- 
preservation,  and  she  was  not  the  girl  to  give 
in  lightly. 

"  Mr.  Glynn,"  she  said,  somewhat  abruptly, 
trying  heroically  to  work  the  stiffness  out  of  the 
situation,  moved  also  by  real  sympathy,  "have 
you  always  lived  alone  ?  "  She  had  thought  so 
much  of  this  in  her  solitary  musings. 

"For  years,  Katy.  Ever  since  the  death  of 
my  grandmother.  You  remember  her  ?  " 

"  Just  a  little.  And  of  course  I  ought  to  know- 
that  you  were  alone.  But  somehow  I  seem  never 
to  have  really  thought  about  you  till  —  lately. 
How  could  you  bear  it  ?  " 

"Very  ill  indeed.  But  I  hope  you  will  make 
it  up  to  me  now  by  thinking  of  me  frequently." 

Katy  stared  at  him  a  moment,  half  deceived 
by  his  sober  look.  "  I  shall  begin  to  think  you 
deserve  to  be  alone,"  she  said  at  length,  "  if  you 
take  pains  to  misunderstand." 

"  I  think  perhaps  if  I  have  a  genius  fo'r  any 
thing,  it  is  for  living  alone.  Why  I  want  you, 
Katy,  is  because  it  is  you,  not  for  dread  of 
solitude." 

"  I  wish  it  were  for  dread  of  solitude." 

"Why?" 

"  Because  then  I  should  be  sure  you  would  not 
be  disappointed." 

"  O  !  but  I  have  you ;  so  I  am  just  as  well 
secured  against  disappointment.  You  see,  Katy, 


A    SENTIMENTAL  SKETCH.  159 

if  it  were  any  one  supposed  trait,  or  person,  or 
influence  that  I  sought,  I  might  be  mistaken ; 
but  you  can't  fail  to  be  Katy." 

"  And  I  suppose  you  are  so  used  to  solitude 
that  you  do  not  mind  it  ?  "  said  Kate  instinctive 
ly,  bearing  away  from  the  point  upon  which  he 
was  as  instinctively  verging. 

"  So,  so.  My  father  died  before  I  was  born, 
and  my  mother  I  do  not  remember.  Fancy  what 
a  savage  I  must  be.  But  you  will  civilize  me 
gradually,  only  be  patient  at  the  slowness  of  the 
process.  Of  course  my  life  would  have  been 
different  if  they  had  lived,  but  I  cannot  miss 
what  I  never  knew.  It  was  natural  to  me  to  be 
alone." 

"  You  had  only  your  grandmother,  and  her  not 
long." 

"  And  though  but  a  boy  at  the  time  of  her 
death,  I  had  long  felt  more  care  of  her  than 
from  her.  Her  loss  was  a  great  sorrow  to  me, 
but  it  did  not  leave  me  orphaned,  or  deprived 
of  any  protection.  It  did  leave  me  alone.  I 
think  I  was  as  happy  as  most  boys,  but  in  a 
different  way.  I  was  very  grave  and  sober. 
I  had  a  frolicsome  little  neighbor  then  for  a 
companion." 

"Yes,"  said  Kate,  "  I  have  heard  of  her." 

"  She  was  the  most  wild,  whimsical,  wilful 
little  witch  in  the  world,  and  she  kept  me  in 
spirits  constantly." 


160  FIRST  LOVE  IS  LEST. 

"She  has  grown  grave  and  sober  herself, 
now." 

"  I  wish  I  might  be  able  to  give  back  to  her  a 
little  of  the  heart  and  courage  she  gave  me." 

Kate  thanked  him  with  a  look.  "  I  am  glad 
you  were  rich,"  she  said,  "  so  you  could  have 
everything  else." 

"Yes,  little  lady;  but  I  remember  you  have 
not  a  great  respect  for  money  !  "  Mr.  Glynn 
glanced  mischievously  at  her  and  she  blushed 
scarlet,  for  she  too  had  vivid  recollections. 

"  However,"  he  added,  "  you  will  do  well  to 
think  twice  before  condemning  it  outright. 
Don't  you  know  the  Bible  meanders  into  a  gold 
mine  at  the  very  outset.  The  gold  of  Havilah 
is  good.  Moses  was  a  sound  financier,  and 
hardly  got  the  thing  started  before  he  slapped  in 
gold  as  the  running-gear  of  the  whole  machine!" 

"  And  how  long  do  you  suppose  it  was  before 
the  Pentateuch  people  got  tired  of  specie  pay 
ment,  and  set  up  their  First  National  Bank  ?  " 

"  But  banks  presuppose  bankers,  and  that  you 
know  is  taboo  in  a  mixed  audience  like  you  and 
me." 

"  O,  I  did  not  know  you  had  so  inconvenient 
a  memory,"  said  Katy,  frowning  away  another 
blush. 

"Ah,  Katy,  my  memory  is  a  merely  local  and 
partial  one.  I  think  I  remember  all  the  things 
that  you  ever  said  or  did.  Otherwise  my  memory 


A    SENTIMENTAL  SKETCH.  161 

is  not  remarkable.  It  certainly  does  not  go  back 
to  the  Pentateuchs.  I  don't  believe  a  mother's 
son  of  them  ever  had  an  honest  five-dollar  bill  in 
his  life." 

"  Then  they  were  spared  the  vexation  of  hav 
ing  their  porte-moimaies  bursting  out  at  the  ends, 
because  they  were  always  made  a  little  too 
short." 

"  No,  that  is  because  they  are  too  full !  We 
have  changed  all  that  now.  Am  I  not  a  man 
and  a  tyrant?  " 

"But  a  rich  one,  as  you  have  confessed  in 
many  a  thoughtless  hour.  How  came  you  to  be 
rich?" 

"Inheritance, 'partly,  and  partly  indifference. 
I  never  cared  much  for  money,  and  so  it  came  in 
from  all  quarters.  My  poverty  in  relatives  is 
the  rather  grim  cause  of  some  accumulation  of 
property." 

"  And  I  suppose  you  have  been  doing  it  your 
self,  too  ?  " 

"Certainly;  I  like  business.  I  like  activity 
and  adventure,  combination  and  calculation.  I 
like  to  see  means  converging  to  ends.  I  like  the 
game,  that  is,  I  care  not  overmuch  for  the  prize. 
I  dare  say  if  I  had  had  a  more  attractive  home 
life,  I  should  have  been  a  poorer  man.  But  now, 
Katy,  I  am  very  glad  I  am  not  a  poor  man.  You 
have  instantly  put  value  on  all  my  possessions." 

Kate's  quick  and  vivid  blush  was  not  only 
11 


1G2  FIRST  LOVE  IS  BEST. 

a  shy  retreat  from  praise,  but  a  sad,  regretful 
consciousness  of  the  meagre  part  her  heart  acted 
in  the  drama.  She  resolutely,  though  silently, 
pledged  herself  never  to  fail  his  faith.  If  self- 
abnegation  and  self-consecration  could  avail,  he 
should  have  all  the  happiness  she  could  give  him, 
if  not  all  that  he  deserved. 

Mr.  Glynn  noted  the  suffusing  color,  and 
quickly  changed  the  subject. 

"  This  is  a  great  improvement  on  yester- 
day." 

"  What  was  yesterday  ? "  asked  Kate,  bril 
liantly. 

"  A  club-supper  in  town." 

"  O  !  did  you  stay  in  town  yesterday  ?  " 

"You  mean  to  say  you  did  not  miss  me?" 
And  then,  as  Kate  looked  up  guiltily,  "Don't 
look  so  horrified,  dear.  I  always  thought  that  a 
selfish,  whining,  not  to  say  snivelling  song,  '  Do 
they  miss  me  at  home  ?  Do  they  miss  me  ? ' 
Yes,  I  came  down  in  the  theatre  train." 

"  I  did  know  that  you  did  not  come  up  to 
see  me,  but  I  thought  you  were  busy.  I  did  not 
know  that  you  had  not  come  home.  What  is  a 
club-supper  ?  " 

"  Tobacco-smoke,  whiskey,  cards,  and  men  — 
which  things  I  hate." 

"  Why  do  you  eat  club-suppers,  then  ?  " 

"  Heaven  only  knows — or  the  other  place." 

"  If  it  were  not  for  the  cards  and  the  whiskey 


A   SENTIMENTAL  SKETCH.  163 

and  the  tobacco,  I  should  think  the  men  would 
be  nice." 

"  The  men,  to  be  sure,  I  do  barely  tolerate." 

"  I  should  think  men  would  like  to  be  by 
themselves  best.  Clever  men,  I  mean.  If  there 
are  women  you.  have  to  be  polite  to  them." 

"  As  if  that  would  come  hard." 

"  But  men  know  so  much  more  than  women." 

"  Is  Saul  also  among  the  prophets  ?  I  never 
thought  you  would  turn  traitor,  Katherine." 

"You  must  not  say  it,  but  /may.  One  would 
not  permit  it  in  public,  but  in  secret,  I  fear  it 
is  true." 

"  I  see.  Officially  you  let  the  feminine  light 
shine,  but  personally  you  think  it  ought  to  be 
hidden  under  a  bushel." 

"  But  women  have  no  chance  to  know  things, 
and  men  have.  So  many  things  happen  to  them 
that  are  interesting." 

"  But  don't  you  remember  the  Chinese  proverb, 
'All  knowledge  is  by  nature  implanted  in  the 
heart  of  a  woman  '  ?  " 

"  I  shall  quarrel  with  you  about  that  some 
time.  I  shall  not  quietly  let  you  consign  women 
to  ignorance,  even  in  polite  phrase." 

"  But  you  will  wait  until  I  have  forgotten  that 
you  began  the  quarrel  by  yourself  concluding  all 
women  in  ignorance." 

"  Of  course  that  was  only  in  a  general  way. 
Some  women  are  very  learned.  There  was  a 


1C4  FIRST  LOVE  IS  BEST. 

Mrs.  "Winstone,  whom  I  met  at  Aunt  Fanny's 
last  winter.  It  is  just  like  reading  a  book  to 
hear  her/' 

"  I  don't  like  people  to  talk  like  books." 

"  You  could  not  fail  to  like  her.  It  was  not  a 
stiff,  dull  book,  but  a  lively  and  entertaining  one. 
What  I  mean  is  —  that  —  now  you  know  for 
instance,  when  I  talk,  I  talk  all  disorderly,  in  a 
heap.  I  can't  get  things  to  come  right,  and  I 
go  back  and  begin  again.  But  she  talks  in 
sentences  that  are  just  perfect." 

"  O,  you  cannot  convince  me.  I  shall  never,  I 
trust,  have  to  take  her  out  to  dinner.  I  suspect 
perfection  here  below.  Give  me  Miss  Ready-to- 
Halt,  who  has  to  dance  with  one  crutch  in  her 
hand,  but  who  foots  it  well,  I  promise  you." 

"  If  j'ou  could  only  once  see  her  you  would 
agree  with  me  instantly.  And  there  was  another, 
Mrs.  Leveridge." 

"  You  don't  mean  to  say  you  saw  Mrs.  Lev 
eridge  ! " 

"  Yes  ;  do  you  know  her  ?  " 

"  Know  her  ?  She  was  the  best,  almost  the 
only  female  friend  I  ever  had.  And  you  met 
her  ?  She  is  a  brilliant  woman  indeed.  I  shall 
agree  with  anything  you  say  about  her." 

"  If  I  had  known  —  "  said  Kate,  and  blushed 
into  silence. 

"  Yes,"  said  Mr.  Glynn,  laughing,  "  if  you  had 
known  and  known,  how  you  would  have  talked 


A  SENTIMENTAL  SKETCH.  165 

me  over,  would  you  not  ?  But  I  suspect  it  was 
lucky  for  me,  for  she  knows  five  times  as  many  of 
my  sins  as  I  ever  committed.  She  has  a  wonder 
ful  faculty  of  setting  things  out  —  what  we  may 
elegantly  call  the  gift  of  language.  I  have  no 
doubt  that  if  you  had  been  at  all  interested  in 
the  subject,  she  would  have  readily  given  you 
sixteen  graphic  descriptions  of  my  character, 
which  she  would  call  analyzing  it,  each  one 
clearly  and  cleverly  drawn,  and  standing  out 
in  bold,  strong  relief,  and  no  two  alike  ;  but 
where  I  should  scramble  into  daylight  under 
such  a  superimposed  weight  of  portraiture,  you 
would  be  puzzled  to  ascertain." 

"  That  is  true,"  said  Kate,  with  interest.  "  I 
have  seen  that  myself.  She  had  been  to  see 
some  pictures  one  day  with  me.  She  was  very 
good  and  took  me.  And  afterwards  people  came 
in,  and  she  talked  about  them,  and  it  was  won 
derful.  And  I  had  not  liked  the  pictures  much. 
Of  course  it  was  because  I  did  not  know  enough 
to  see  in  them  what  she  did.  It  was  as  if  she 
had  seen  a  dozen  pictures,  one  under  the  other, 
like  a  palimpsest.  I  liked  her  talk  a  great  deal 
better  than  the  pictures." 

"  Of  course  you  did.  There  was  a  good  deal 
more  in  it.  I  used  to  be  under  the  same  spell 
when  I  was  in  college,  and  she  was  a  brilliant 
young  lady  in  town,  ruling  with  absolute  sway, 
no  sister  near  the  throne." 


166  FIRST  LOVE  IS  BEST. 

"  O  !  "  breathed  Katherine,  looking  up  with 
smiling  inquiry. 

"  O  !  are  you  there  ?  Not  quite.  I  believe  it 
is  generally  understood  that  all  the  men  on  the 
Merrimac  River  have  at  one  time  or  another 
passed  under  her  yoke.  But  I  never  aspired  so 
high.  She  patronized  me,  and  younger-brothered 
me  to  the  endangering  of  my  soul  through  pride 
and  vainglory  ;  but  she  was  too  good  and  sim 
ple  and  dignified  to  trifle  with  me.  We  were 
very  good  friends  then  ;  but,  dear  me,  she  has 
since  taken  a  husband  and  children,  and  I  hon 
estly  think  she  now  cares  more  for  her  smallest 
child  than  she  does  for  me  !  Eh  ?  "  to  Kate's 
little  laugh  of  surprise. 

"  I  am  glad  you  think  she  is  good,"  said  Kath 
erine.  "  I  think  she  is  magnificently  good." 

"  She  has  need  to  be.  If  she  were  not  the 
best  woman  in  the  world,  she  would  be  the 
worst." 

"O,  no!" 

"  O,  yes.  Don't  you  see  ?  She  is  so  diaboli 
cally  clever  and  creative.  Give  her  the  knee-pan 
of  a  man's  character,  and  she  builds  up  the  whole 
beast  on  it.  It  may  be  a  quite  different  being 
from  the  original  animal,  but  it  is  sure  to  be  so 
strong  and  spirited,  whether  for  good  or  evil,  that 
it  instantly  supplants  the  original  in  the  gaze  of 
all  beholders.  Now,  if  she  were  ill-disposed, 
don't  you  see  how  mischievous  she  would  be  ?  " 


A  SENTIMENTAL  SKETCH.  167 

"  But  she  is  not  ill-disposed." 

"  Just  what  I  say.  On  the  contrary,  she  over 
flows  with  benevolence  towards  all  created  be 
ings.  Like  all  great  members  of  the  universe, 
she  is  ruled  by  two  forces.  Her  preternatural 
clearness  shows  her  all  salient  points,  and  her 
wit  instantly  seizes  them,  while  her  inexhausti 
ble  kindness  claims  all  her  sympathy  for  the  side 
of  humanity.  So  between  the  two  she  takes  the 
curve  of  piquant  popularity." 

"Yes,"  said  Kate,  "every  one  brings  her 
tribute." 

"  O  !  but  does  she  not  come  down  hard  on  a 
poor  fellow  if  he  takes  the  wrong  tack  !  "  said 
Mr.  Glynn,  evidently  with  vivid  recollections  of 
such  descents  upon  himself. 

"  He  should  not  take  the  wrong  tack." 

"  To  be  sure.  But  only  few  of  us  are  per 
fect." 

"  But  it  is  only  certain  kinds  of  bad  things 
that  Mrs.  Leveiidge  will  not  tolerate.  A  great 
many  things  she  is  far  more  patient  with  than  I 
could  be." 

"  Ah,  Katy  !  the  mischief  with  all  you  good 
women  is,  that  none  of  you  have  charitableness. 
I  suppose  it  is  the  necessary  result  of  being  good. 
Spots  must  show  blacker  against  white  than 
against  the  party-color  of  weather-beaten  hu 
manity." 

"  Your  pill  is  round  and  sweet,  and  looks  like 


168  FIRST  LOVE  IS  BEST. 

a  sugar-plum  ;  but  as  I  roll  it  around  in  my 
mind,  it  seems  to  me  that  it  is  a  pill." 

"  O,  you  have  great  store  of  Christian  charity, 
broad  enough  for  the  human  race,  unlimited 
forgiveness  for  sin  in  the  abstract,  the  wildest 
schemes  of  redemption  for  sinners  in  general;  but 
let  one  of  your  friends  do  a  definite  wrong  thing, 
and  there  is  no  atonement." 

"  Well,"  said  Kate,  stoutly,  "  the  Bible  only 
says  forgive  your  enemies.  I  don't  know  that 
we  are  anywhere  commanded  to  forgive  our 
friends." 

"  Well  done,  Kate.  It  is  you  for  the  applica 
tion  of  Christian  precepts  to  daily  life  !  But  is 
it  worth  while  to  keep  a  small  flaw  of  a  friend  — 
or  even  a  large  flaw  —  so  near  the  eye  as  to  shut 
out  the  whole  character  ?  " 

'•  My  friends  do  not  have  flaws,"  said  Kate, 
sententiously. 

"  Stick  to  that,  Katy,"  said  Mr.  Glynn,  laugh 
ing.  "  I  think  I  like  your  law  better  than  your 
gospel ;  a  fellow  feels  safer  under  it ;  only  don't 
turn  it  around.  But  you  are  certainly  getting 
better.  You  hit  back." 

"  Are  you  afraid  ?  " 

"  Of  course  I  am.  I  have  been  afraid  of  you, 
you  little  witch,  ever  since  you  were  two  years 
old,  and  used  to  go  into  the  divinest  little  rages. 
What  fun  it  was  to  see  you  sputter,  and  scold, 
and  stamp  your  little  feet,  and  strike  out  with 


A   SENTIMENTAL  SKETCH.  169 

your  little  fists  like  chain-lightning,  a  great  deal 
faster  than  you  could  talk  —  " 

"  Amiable  creature  !  If  I  may  be  allowed  to 
interrupt." 

"  O,  a  comment  is  not  an  interruption.  The 
worst  thing  about  ladies'  symposiums,  Katy,  is 
not  that  they  don't  know  things,  but  they  are 
always  passing  the  salt  or  something  in  the  mid 
dle  of  the  sentence.  Of  course  I  cannot  be  stim 
ulated  by  an  intimation  that  a  potato  is  of  more 
value  than  my  remarks.  Now  you,  Katy,  have 
not  really  interrupted  me  once." 

"  No,"  said  Katherine,  "  I  was  not  hungry." 

"  The  saints  defend  us  !  They  are  certainly 
attacking  us.  And  in  truth,  Katy,  you  have 
eaten  nothing,  and  you  are  tired,  dear." 

"  Just  a  little.     I  think  I  will  —  " 

"  O,  don't  go.  Don't  run  away.  Come  into 
the  library.  I  will  settle  you  as  comfortably  as 
you  can  be  in  your  own  room.  I  won't  even 
talk  to  you.  Only  stay  a  little  while  with  me." 
And  Katherine  suffered  herself  to  be  drawn  into 
the  library. 

It  was  a  large,  low-browed,  and  not  altogether 
cheerful  room.  Books  were  everywhere  —  not 
only  ranged  against  the  walls,  but  under  the 
tables,  piled  in  zigzag  rows  and  tottering  col 
umns  along  the  floor,  and  overstrewn  with  pam 
phlets  and  papers,  which  also  obtruded  from 
behind  every  shelf  or  frame  that  would  hold 


170  FIRST  LOVE  IS  BEST. 

them  up ;  so  that  it  required  no  little  care  in 
Kate  to  pick  her  way  safely  among  the  ddbris. 
Old  engravings  in  old  frames,  quaint  and  odd, 
coarse  and  fine,  were  hanging,  and  standing,  and 
falling  everywhere,  very  curious  and  valuable  as 
illustrating  the  progress  of  the  art,  but  less  suc 
cessful  as  ornamentation.  Most  of  the  chairs  had 
their  arms  full,  and  most  of  the  drawers  were 
open,  and  all  that  were  open  staid  open,  because 
they  were  too  full  to  shut.  Wherever  the  over 
burdened  carpet  could  dim  twinkle  through  the 
storm,  it  did  not  serve  to  mend  matters.  One  or 
two  fine  bronzes  were  —  shall  I  say  chucked  — 
out  of  harm's  way  under  the  bay-window,  but 
not  in  a  position  to  bring  out  their  beauties  to 
advantage.  A  plaster  Socrates  with  a  very  dirty 
face,  as  is  perhaps  biographically  proper,  viewed 
the  world  sidewise  from  the  top  of  a  book-shelf* 
the  heads  of  several  Roman  emperors  kept  him 
in  distinguished  company,  and  an  unhappy  Cle 
opatra  glared  with  broken-nosed  disgust  upon 
the  situation.  Evidently  Mr.  Glynn  was  no  dis 
ciple  of  Eastlake,  no  devotee  of  the  Renaissance, 
but  a  heathen  man  and  a  publican  whom  the 
Gospel  of  Furniture  had  never  reached,  dead  in 
trespasses  and  sins  against  Morris  and  Household 
Art  and  the  Expression  of  Rooms.  But  he,  good 
man,  had  no  misgivings.  He  brought  Kate  into 
this  den  in  perfect  good  faith.  He  gave  the 
dying  embers  on  the  hearth  a  vigorous  poke. 


A   SENTIMENTAL  SKETCH.  171 

and  thrust  and  piled  on  the  wood  till  the  danc 
ing  flames  sent  a  glow  through  the  gloom.  He 
cleared  a  large  reclining-chair  by  the  simple  pro 
cess  of  suddenly  tipping  it  aslant  enough  for 
eveiy  book  and  paper  to  slide  out,  and  with 
great  muscular  force  ploughed  it  through  the 
rough  field,  scattering  books  right  and  left,  to 
a  small  clearing  in  front  of  the  hearth.  Therein 
he  bestowed  Katheriue,  and  with  such  careful 
and  gentle  arrangement  of  cushions  and  foot-rest 
and  fire-screen,  that  she  could  but  admit  she  was 
very  comfortable.  And  even  as  she  smiled  her 
thanks,  the  treacherous  tears  rushed  into  her 
eyes,  and  her  wilful  breath  came  in  a  quick, 
gasping  sob. 

"  O  Katy  !  "  was  all  her  unhappy  husband 
could  moan,  standing  over  her  in  helpless  blank 
dismay. 

"  I  am  not  ungrateful,  believe  me,"  cried  Kath- 
erine.  "  I  am  not  unhappy." 

"  You  must  not  speak  or  think  of  gratitude, 
dear,"  he  said,  softly. 

"  But  I  must.  You  are  so  good.  Do  not 
think  I  do  not  feel  how  kind  you  are.  You 
have  been  ever  since  —  ever  since  —  " 

"  It  is  you  who  are  good  to  me,  Katy.  You 
gave  up  the  solitude  you  craved  and  came  to 
me.  All  my  life  I  can  never  thank  you  enough 
for  this  —  this,  which  I  know  was  a  sacrifice." 

"  But  it  shall  not  be  a  sacrifice,"  cried  Kate. 


172  F7RST  LOVE  IS  BEST. 

"  I  did  not  mean  it  for  that.  I  do  mean  to  make 
you  happy  and  be  pleasant  to  you."  If  he  smiled 
inwardly  at  the  under-meaning  which  Kate  did 
not  intend  to  convey,  his  face  gave  no  sign. 

"  My  dear  little  girl,  you  are  pleasanter  to  me 
than  words  can  tell.  You  have  made  me  happy 
already.  You  do  not  need  to  intend  anything 
The  mere  fact  that  you  are  here,  never  to  go 
away  again  from  me,  is  enough.  It  is  like  per 
petual  sunshine.  When  I  am  in  town  all  day, 
I  am  never  without  a  secret  consciousness  of 
something  pleasant  awaiting  me.  When  I  come 
in  sight  of  the  house,  I  look  up  first  at  your 
windows,  and  think  what  is  behind  them  for  me, 
not  to-day  merely,  but  for  all  the  days  of  my 
life.  You  see,  Katy,  how  I  am  past  remedy. 
Be  at  peace,  dear  little  heart,  for  my  happi 
ness." 

"  You  will  not  think  I  am  troublesome." 

"  Never  ;  "  smiling  in  spite  of  himself. 

"  Nor  unhappy." 

"  Not  if  you  tell  me  you  are  not." 

"  Indeed  I  am  not.  Truly  I  am  not.  Only 
be  patient  with  me.  Give  me  time.  It  is  all  — 
so  —  strange." 

"  I  know,  Katy.  You  have  had  a  great  loss 
and  a  great  change.  It  will  take  time  to  adjust 
yourself  to  your  new  life.  You  have  been  ill 
too.  You  must  remember  that,  and  not  be  im 
patient  with  yourself.  You  are  a  brave,  good 


A   SENTIMENTAL  SKETCH.  173 

girl,  and  all  will  surely  come  right  if  you  will 
be  patient.  It  is  not  J  that  am  waiting,  dear. 
I  am  happ3T  because  I  have  you.  I  cannot  be 
happier  —  only  in  seeing  you  grow  strong  and 
cheerful.  Unless  —  O  my  darling,  have,  I  done 
you  a  harm  ?  Do  you  feel  I  have  wronged  you 
in  bringing  you  here  ?  " 

"  O,  no,  no,"  said  Kate,  eagerly  and  sincerely. 

"  Does  it  trouble  you  to  be  here  ?  " 

"  I  do  not  think  it  does  ;  "  trying  to  be  at 
once  honest  and  kind.  "  Nothing  could  make 
me  anywhere  —  light-hearted." 

"  No,  dear,  you  never  could  have  taken  up 
the  old  life.  It  is  only  that  you  begin  the  new 
with  me  instead  of  alone  —  to  my  infinite  con 
tent.  So  you  must  try  and  think  friendly 
thoughts  of  me." 

And  then  he  sat  by  her  side  in  the  soft  idealiz 
ing  fire-light,  silent,  caressing  the  passive  hand, 
firm  and  strong  no  longer,  but  dearer  grown  by 
weakness. 

"  You  don't  care  for  this,"  he  said,  playfully. 
"  Kissing  hands  is  only  a  sovereign  courtesy. 
That  is  not  breaking  my  pact." 

"  You  need  not  do  that,"  said  Katherine,  in 
the  fullness  of  her  remorseful  gratitude.  "  You 
may  kiss  me  if  you  wish." 

"  Ah,  Kitty,  it  is  very  sweet  in  you  to  say  so ; 
but  the  kiss  I  am  waiting  for  is  not  the  kiss  you 
will  offer  me." 


174  FIRST  LOVE  IS  BEST. 

Nevertheless  he  did  not  decline  the  offer, 
though  fearful  as  soon  as  he  had  spoken  lest 
Kate  should  take  alarm  and  feel  herself  called 
upon  for  a  love  which  had  no  value  and  no  exist 
ence  except  by  spontaneity  —  an  alarm  which 
he  knew  would  only  delay  if  not  defeat  his  eager 
hope  of  one  day  possessing  her  heart.  But  Kath- 
erine  was  not  yet  sufficiently  released  from  her 
self  to  take  much  heed  of  him,  and  she  detected 
no  plot  against  her  peaceful,  if  monotonous, 
future.  Mr.  Glynn  rang  for  lights,  and  busied 
himself  with  books  and  papers  and  —  watching 
Kate; -and  Kate  lay  flushing  in  the  fire-light's 
rosy  glow,  wide-eyed  and  thoughtful,  trying  to 
realize  rather  than  to  remember,  but  remember 
ing  only  and  not  realizing,  till  it  was  in  good 
earnest  time  to  go ;  and  when  she  left  him,  his 
last  words  lingering  softly  in  her  ears  and  fall 
ing  softly  on  her  heart,  rewarded  her  for  the 
effort  she  had  made  to  come. 

"  You  have  given  me  the  happiest  evening  of 
my  life."  And  she  was  comforted. 


XI. 

4  FTER  this  nothing  seemed  so  hard.  The  ice 
J\.  was  broken  ;  and  she  could  meet  Mr.  Glynn, 
and  take  her  place  at  his  table,  and  feel  herself 
not  wholly  a  stranger.  He  helped  her  much  by 
his  cheery  and  genial,  but  unchanged,  scarce 
ly  more  than  accented  friendliness.  He  never 
frightened  her  by  even  seeming  to  wish  for  more 
than  she  was  glad  to  give.  He  betrayed  no  dis 
content  if  she  was  pensive.  Whenever  she  came 
to  him,  she  was  received  with  such  warm  wel 
come  as  could  not  fail  to  put  her  in  heart  with 
herself.  If  she  held  to  solitude,  she  was  not  chid 
den  or  questioned  by  so  much  as  a  look.  In  all 
things  she  felt  herself  wholly  free  to  consult  her 
own  pleasure ;  nor  could  she  ever  fail  to  see  that 
he  sought  the  same  end.  There  seemed  to  be  no 
effort,  no  duty,  about  it.  It  was  only  that  his 
life  lay  in  hers.  He  found  his  happiness  in  the 
paths  where  her  feet  wandered.  Of  course  Kate 
would  have  been  a  monster  to  disregard  this  gen 
erous  seeking.  And  Kate  was  no  monster,  but 

175 


176  FIRST  LOVE  IS  BEST. 

a  good  girl,  somewhat  cast  down  by  adverse  fate, 
but  trying  earnestly  to  do  the  right  thing,  albeit 
with  a  heavy  heart ;  and  in  so  doing  and  so  try 
ing,  her  heart  came  gradually  to  be  lightened  of 
its  load.  In  the  steadfast  love  of  this  strong 
friend  she  felt  no  triumph.  It  was  to  her  no 
opportunity  for  self-indulgence,  for  pride,  or  ca 
price,  or  petty  tyranny  ;  but  a  great  trust,  which 
had  been  committed  to  her  unsought  —  from 
which,  indeed,  she  had  shrunk  ;  but  which,  ac 
cepted,  she  must  discharge  with  sacred  fidelity. 
If  she  had  loved  him,  —  not  as  she  did  regard  him, 
with  a  true  respect  and  friendship,  —  but  if  she 
had  loved  him  as  she  could  love,  she  would  have 
known  what  to  do.  But  —  well  —  and  if  she 
loved  him,  what  would  she  do  ?  Why,  of  course, 
make  his  life  as  happy  as  possible  ;  and  first  of 
all,  make  herself  and  the  house  pleasant  to  him. 
And  after  all,  why  was  not  that  the  very  best 
thing  to  do  as  it  was  ?  Besides,  said  Kate  to  her 
self,  resolute  to  be  at  least  for  him  victorious, 
how  many  girls  have  married  the  right  man,  and 
have  found  him  bad  !  I  have  not  gone  my  own 
way  ;  but  how  good  he  is  !  Nobody  could  be 
better.  And  if  he  had  been  bad  and  tyrannical 
and  selfish,  and  yet  had  made  me  marry  him  all 
the  same  !  Such  thoughts  were  running  through 
Kate's  mind  in  an  under-current  while  she  was 
listening  to  her  loving  aunt,  who  had  come  down 
on  a  visit  of  mingled  inquiry,  condolence,  and 


A   SENTIMENTAL  SKETCH.  177 

congratulation  to  her  niece.  Many  praiseworthy 
sentiments  regarding  her  good  fortune  in  having 
attracted  so  unexceptionable  a  man,  and  secured 
so  desirable  a  husband ;  the  unbounded  duty  she 
owed  him  ;  and  it  must  be  added,  too,  the  un 
bounded  use  she  must  make  of  her  position  and 
possibilities,  were  passing  tranquilly  over  the  un- 
rippled  surface  of  Kate's  mind  without  at  all  dis 
turbing  her  real  thoughts.  But  presently  a  little 
too  pronounced  emphasis  on  her  good  luck  jarred 
upon  her.  Kate  was  ready  and  forward  herself 
to  ascribe  all  goodness  and  unselfishness  to  Mr. 
Glynn  ;  but  it  was  a  matter  altogether  between 
herself  and  him.  She  had  no  mind  to  be  con 
gratulated  as  a  lucky  girl  who  had  made  a  good 
match. 

"Aunty  dear,"  she  said,  a  little  mischievously, 
"  what  a  very  poor  opinion  you  must  have  of 
me." 

"  A  poor  opinion  of  you  !  What  can  you  be 
thinking  of,  Kate  ?  " 

"  Certainly  you  must  have  supposed  my  deserts 
of  the  feeblest,  or  you  would  not  make  so  much 
of  my  having  married  a  respectable  man.  Now, 
for  my  part,  I  don't  think  I  was  a  bad  match  for 
any  one.  Your  niece,  aunty  !  It  is  not  very 
manly  in  you  to  put  me  down." 

"  Put  you  down,  Katherine  ?  " 

u  Certainly,  aunty.  You  have  been  edging  me 
down  into  the  Valley  of  Humiliation  ever  since 
12 


178  FIRST  LOVE  fS  BEST. 

you  have  been  here.  Why  don't  you  say  what  a 
lucky  man  is  Mr.  Glynn  to  have  coaxed  such  a 
nice  girl  as  I  into  marrying  him  ?  —  handsome, 
stylish  —  now,  aunty,  you  look  severe.  Don't 
say  I  am  not  handsome,  if  you  can  help  it ;  but, 
above  all  things,  don't  say  I  am  not  stylish,  for  I 
cannot  bear  it  —  not  in  my  present  weak  state. 
You  know  I  have  not  recovered  my  full  strength 
yet,  and  if  I  am  not  humored  I  shall  have  a  re 
lapse." 

"  You  little  trollop  !  to  be  talking  to  me  this 
way !  "  said  Mrs.  Ford,  with  good-humored  in 
dignation. 

"  I  never  saw  such  austere  virtue,  aunt.  You 
won't  even  be  dragooned  into  a  compliment. 
And  you  have  been  praising  Mr.  Glynn  for  the 
last  half  hour,  without  once  stopping." 

"  Well,  my  dear,  I  never  heard  that  praise  of 
a  husband  was  dispraise  of  a  wife." 

"  Nor  I,  aunty,  until  this  sad  hour." 

"  I  don't  mean  to  say,  Katherine,  that  you  are 
not  good  enough  for  any  man  in  the  country ;  but, 
at  the  same  time,  there  was  no  reason  why  you 
should  expect  anything  remarkable.  You  were 
a  match  for  anybody,  but  not  a  catch." 

"  An  epigram  !  "  said  Kate,  solemnly.  "  A 
match,  but  not  a  catch  !  " 

"And  Mr.  Glynn  has  behaved  so  extraordi 
narily  well  about  the  property." 

"  What  property,  aunt  ?  " 


A   SENTIMENTAL  SKETCH.  179 

"  Yours,  my  child  ;  or  what  should  have  been 
yours." 

"  You  mean  about  poor  papa's  trouble  ?  " 

"  Yes  ;  the  whole  arrangement." 

"  I  do  not  know  what  you  mean  by  his  behaving 
well.  He  had  no  chance  to  behave  ill,  if  he  had 
been  ever  so  ill-disposed.  My  father  lost  all  the 
money  before  Mr.  Glynn  had  anything  to  do  with 
it.  I  don't  know  that  he  could  have  done  any 
thing  except  turn  around  and  make  faces  at  me. 
But  then,  you  know,  I  should  not  have  married 
him." 

"  My  dear  Kate,  you  are  a  little  fool,  especial 
ly  for  thinking  I  am  such  a  great  one.  I  suppose 
Mr.  Glynn  has  not  told  you  the  whole  state  of 
the  case.  He  asked  me  to  say  nothing  about  it 
at  first,  as  you  had  trouble  enough,  and  we  were 
very  glad  to  save  you  any  more.  But  I  supposed 
you  did  know  now." 

"  I  did  not  know  there  was  anything  to  know," 
said  Kate,  faintly.  "  I  have  been  ill,  you  must 
remember.  And  perhaps,"  she  added,  with  some 
thing  of  shame-faced  loyalty  to  the  relation  in 
which  she  stood  to  Mr.  Glynn,  "  perhaps  you 
ought  not  to  say  anything  now,  if  Mr.  Glynn 
chooses  not." 

"  Nonsense,  Katy.  It  is  my  affair  as  much  as 
Mr.  Glynn's.  And  besides,  you  ought  to  know, 
that  you  may  understand  what  I  have  been  say 
ing  ;  besides,  there  is  nothing  to  tell.  I  think 


180  FIRST  LOVE  IS  BEST. 

your  poor  dear  father  died  without  realizing  the 
extent  of  his  losses." 

"  I  am  glad  of  that,"  gasped  Kate. 

"  So  am  I.  It  was  the  most  extraordinary 
thing  that  a  man  so  careful,  so  prudent,  and  I 
think  I  may  say  so  wise,  —  but  there,"  and  she 
dried  her  good  old  eyes,  "  did  you  know,  Kate, 
that  he  lost  everything  ?  " 

"  I  did  not  know  particularly.  I  knew  he  had 
great  losses  that  troubled  him  much." 

"  He  gave  everything  over  into  Richard  Glynn's 
hands,  and  he  was  still  at  work  on  it  when  your 
dear  father  was  taken  ill.  It  was  as  bad  as  it 
could  be,  Kate.  The  farm  would  have  been  sold 
under  your  feet  and  the  house  over  your  head  ; 
and  what  does  Mr.  Glynn  do  but  pay  the  whole 
valuation  himself,  declaring  to  me  that  you  should 
not  be  disturbed  in  your  trouble,  and  simply  mak 
ing  it  a  matter  of  business  with  the  other  side ! 
And  not  a  word  was  to  be  said  to  you  about  it. 
But  now  that  you  are  married,  and  moved,  why 
should  3rou  not  know  it  ?  " 

"  Why,  indeed  ?  "  said  Kate. 

"  Now  you  know  very  little,  Kate,  about  any 
thing  ;  but  I  can  tell  you  that  there  are  very  few 
men  who  would  have  done  that,  especially  when 
they  were  just  going  to  marry  you,  and  would 
naturally  have  said,  '  Why,  let  it  all  go.  You 
are  to  have  another  home.  What  could  you  do 
with  two  ?  '  A  good  many  people  would  call  it 


A   SENTIMENTAL  SKETCH.  181 

mere  sentimentalism,  and  I  don't  say  they  would 
call  names !  " 

"Mr.  Glynn,"  said  Kate  that  evening,  looking 
up  from  the  book  she  had  been  vainly  trying  to 
read,  "  I  know  about  the  farm." 

"  About  the  farm  ?  "  he  queried,  guilty  but 
parrying. 

"  Aunt  Fanny  told  me." 

"  Is  it  possible  you  two  had  come  to  the  end 
of  your  tether  and  were  reduced  to  real  estate 
for  conversation?  " 

"  O,  Mr.  Glynn,  I  know  why  you  did  it ;  but 
you  must  see  it  comes  a  little  hard  on  me." 

"  If  I  must,  I  must ;  but  as  a  mere  matter  of 
fact,  I  don't." 

"  I  did  not  know  that,  added  to  everything 
else,  I  came  to  you  a  beggar." 

"  No  more  did  I.  As  I  remember  the  course 
of  human  events,  it  seems  to  me  that  I  was  the 
one  who  did  the  begging.  You  only  granted 
grace  —  and  not  even  that.  I  took  grace  by 
main  force  and  carried  it  off." 

"But,  Mr.  Glynn — it  was  kindly  done,  I 
know,  most  generously  done —  " 

"  Not  a  bit  of  it.  It  was  bare-faced  pillage. 
You  could  prosecute  me  for  abduction  in  any 
court  in  Christendom  and  stand  a  round  chance 
for  damages.  But  mind,  Kate,  I  will  fight  you 
to  the  very  last,  and  I  will  carry  you  off  at  the 
end.  So  you  won't  make  much  by  that  move." 


182  FIRST  LOVE  IS  BEST. 

"  But  do  you  think,"  said  Kate,  not  to  be  di 
verted  from  her  purpose,  "  that  it  was  quite  fair 
to  let  me  go  on  so,  knowing  nothing.  I  was  a 
woman  grown.  Ought  not  I  to  have  known 
where  I  stood  ?  " 

"  Not  in  the  least.  Because,  if  you  had,  you 
would  not  have  stood  there  !  " 

"  How  could  I  know,  then,  what  I  was  do- 
ing?" 

"  You  could  not,  dear.  That  is  the  very  thing 
I  did  not  want  you  to  know,  because  then  you 
would  not  have  done  it.  Don't  you  see  ?  It  is 
as  plain  as  a  pike-staff  to  me." 

"  But  I  was  in  a  false  position  all  the  time." 

"  I  should  have  been  in  a  falser  one  if  you  had 
not  been." 

"  I  do  not  see  why." 

"Why?  Because,  as  it  was,  all  I  had  to  do 
was  lie  low.  If  you  had  known,  I  should  have 
had  to  lie  high  and  low,  right  and  left.  And  I 
have  a  conscience  which  never  permits  me  to 
deceive  more  tlian  is  absolutely  necessary  to  the 
end  in  view.  Don't  corrupt  me,  Katy." 

"  And  you  feel  perfectly  justified,  even  now, 
looking  back  upon  it  ?  " 

"  Justified  ?  Glorified  !  Why,  look  at  her  !  I 
had  hard  work  enough  to  get  you,  as  it  was.  If 
the  question  had  been  complicated  with  penni- 
lessness,  independence,  working  for  a  living,  and 
such  high  and  mighty  abstractions,  when  would 


A   SENTIMENTAL  SKETCH.  183 

I  have  seen  the  end  of  it?  Justified  indeed! 
See  here,  Kate.  I  would  have  burned  the  old 
mill  and  machinery  with  my  own  hands,  rather 
than  not  have  the  chance  at  you  !  "  Thus  this 
unblushing  machinator. 

"And  I  was  thinking  all  the  while  I  could 
stay  on  the  farm,"  said  Kate,  musingly. 

"  Well,  so  you  could.  It  was  your  own.  Only 
I  ordered  you  off.  But  don't  you  know  of  a  cer 
tainty  that  if  you  had  been  told  the  farm  was 
forfeit  you  would  have  flown  instantly  into  a 
factory,  or  a  school-house,  or  some  demnition 
grind  or  other,  (it  is  a  quotation,  Katy  ;  it  is  not 
original  sin.  There  is  a  vast  difference  between 
literature  and  profaneness,)  and  then  where 
should  I  have  been?  Instead  of  that,  I  kept 
you  under  my  own  eye  where  I  could  work  to 
advantage." 

"But  in  your  honest,  inner  mind,  don't  you 
think  you  ought  to  have  given  me  a  chance  ?  " 

"  Chance  to  what  ?  " 

"  To  manage  my  own  affairs  ?  " 

"  Not  a  bit  of  it.  I  wanted  to  manage  them 
myself !  In  my  own  interests  !  I  could  do  it  a 
great  deal  better  than  you." 

"  But  I  ought  to  have  done  —  I  ought  to  have 
had  a  chance  to  do  what  was  dignified  and  self- 
respectful." 

"  Ah,  that  is  precisely  the  tangent  you  would 
have  gone  off  on  —  dignity  !  Did  I  not  know, 


184  FIRST  LOVE  IS  BEST. 

Kate,  what  a  close  shave  it  was  ?  Now  you  may 
dignify  as  much  as  you  like,  I  have  got  the  law 
on  you  !  A  pretty  piece  of  business  it  would 
have  been  before  you  were  in  my  hands.  That 
is  the  beauty  of  the  existing  order  of  things. 
Once  get  a  woman  in  the  clutch  of  marriage  and 
she  can't  help  herself.  So,  Katy  !  " 

"  But  I  am  a  Woman's-rights  woman,"  said 
Katherine,  dubiously. 

"  So  am  I,"  said  Mr.  Glynn,  cheerfully,  soaring 
above  sex. 

"  Then  I  think  I  ought  to  have  my  rights." 

"  You  shall,  Kate,  if  I  can  get  them  for  you. 
What,  to  begin  with  ?  " 

"  The  right  to  be  poor,  and  know  I  am  poor 
and  earn  my  own  bread  and  butter." 

"  But  you  are  not,  Kitty.  You  are  really  quite 
a  rich  woman.  You  own  a  good  house  —  two, 
for  that  matter  —  and  considerable  land,  and 
some  live-stock,  and  bank  stock,  and  state  and 
city  bonds,  —  upon  my  word,  Kate,  it  is  a  pretty 
joke  calling  yourself  poor." 

"  But  I  did  not  come  fairly  by  it.  How  would 
you  feel  to  find  that  you  had  just  nothing  and 
took  all  from  me  ?  " 

"  I  will  make  it  all  over  to  you  and  see." 

"  I  don't  believe  you  would  dare  try  that," 
said  Kate,  smiling. 

"  Dare  !  It  would  not  make  a  day's  difference. 
I  would  have  it  all  out  of  your  hands  again  so 


A  SENTIMENTAL  SKETCH.  185 

quick  that  you  would  not  know  it  had  ever 
been  in." 

"You  would  not  speak  so  contemptuously  of 
my  business  abilities  if  I  were  a  man." 

"  Of  course  not.     I  should  not  think  so." 

"  But  you  have  never  tried  me  to  know 
whether  I  had  any  financial  sagacity  or  not." 

"  I  never  mean  to." 

"  Mr.  Glynu,  you  are  perfectly  lost  in  the  gall 
of  bitterness  and  the  bonds  of  iniquity." 

"I  am  afraid  I  am." 

"Why  can  a  man  not  treat  a  woman  on  the 
basis  of  equality  with  himself — at  least  till  he 
finds  out  to  the  contrary  ?  I  don't  mean,"  con 
tinued  Kate,  hastily,  "  that  I  knew  about  things 
as  you  did,  but  if  I  had  been  a  boy  as  old  as  I 
was,  even  though  I  had  known  no  more  than  I 
did,  3*ou  would  have  acted  so  differently." 

"  Certainly  I  should.  What  did  I  want  of  a 
great  lubberly  boy  ?  " 

"  But  you  would  have  consulted  him.  If  a 
man  found  '  a  great  lubberly  boy  '  sitting  idle  in 
a  house  not  his  own,  he  would  never  pay  his 
debts  and  say  nothing  to  him  about  it." 

"  By  no  means.  He  would  take  him  by  the 
scruff  of  the  neck  and  pitch  him  into  the  street." 

"  And  don't  3-011  think  it  would  be  better  for 
girls  —  I  won't  say  to  be  pitched  into  the  street 
by  the  scruff  of  their  necks  —  I  don't  know  what 
that  is.  It  does  not  sound  very  elegant." 


186  FIRST  LOVE  IS  BEST. 

"It  is  not,  Katy.  It  applies  only  to  boys. 
Girls  have  a  ruff  instead,  which  is  very  elegant." 

"  Well,  then,  don't  you  think  it  would  be  bet 
ter  if  these  girls  were  taught  to  depend  upon 
their  own  resources  and  make  their  lives  strong 
and  self-supporting,  and  so  command  respect 
instead  of  extorting  pity  ?" 

"  No,  I  do  not.  I  think  the  best  thing  for  a 
girl,  if  she  is  in  trouble  or  if  she  is  not,  is  to  have 
the  man  who  loves  her  go  to  her  and  take  her, 
peaceably  if  he  can,  forcibly  if  he  must,  and  bring 
her  to  his  own  home  to  love  her  and  serve  her, 
and  keep  her  out  of  harm's  way  all  the  days  of 
his  life,  for  the  good  of  his  soul." 

"  That  does  not  seem  to  have  the  ring  of  re 
form.  What  are  the  girls  to  do  who  don't  have 
a  Thracian  and  a  soldier  to  carry  them  off?  " 

"  Katy,  you  need  not  try  to  convince  me  of 
sin.  I  will  agree  to  everything  you  say,  up  and 
down.  You  can't  bring  forward  a  theory  that  I 
won't  subscribe  to.  All  the  same,  I  am  glad  I 
hoodwinked  you,  and  blindfolded  you,  and  be- 
juggled  you  into  this  house.  I  have  been  glad 
ever  since.  I  would  do  it  again,  twice  as  bad,  if 
necessary.  I  wish  I  could  look  back  upon  any  vir 
tue  I  ever  practised  with  half  as  much  compla 
cency  as  I  do  on  this  flat  burglary.  Come,  now." 

"  Why,  this  is  being  dead  in  trespasses  and 
sin,"  sighed  Kate,  her  breath  fairly  taken  away 
by  his  audacity. 


A   SENTIMENTAL  SKETCH.  187 

"  Katrina,  come  and  sit  here  by  me.  You  are 
not  really  vexed  ?  " 

"  O,  no,  not  vexed.     Not  that  at  all." 

"  If  you  are,  there  is  one  way  you  can  have 
revenge." 

"What  is  that?" 

"  By  thanking  me." 

The  blood  rushed  into  Kate's  cheeks,  the  tears 
into  her  eyes. 

"  My  dearest,  sweetest,  best,"  he  cried,  serious 
enough  now,  "it  is  such  a  little  thing  you  are 
beating  against !  If  I  had  loved  you  less,  if  I 
had  been  only  a  common  friend,  a  decent  neigh 
bor,  I  could  hardly  have  done  otherwise.  As  it 
was,  what  was  it?  I  would  not  have  had  you 
leave  me  then  —  not  for  a  thousand  fortunes.  I 
made  a  pen-scratch  and  kept  you.  That  was 
all.  What  were  a  few  thousand  dollars,  more  or 
less,  to  me  ?  I  wanted  you.  It  was  a  pure  piece 
of  selfishness,  Katy,  and  it  has  prospered  greatly, 
as  most  selfishness  does." 

"  I  do  not  believe  a  word  you  are  saying,"  said 
Kate,  smiling  through  her  tears. 

"  Never  mind,  dear  ;  I  have  got  you,  and  you 
have  got  the  farm,  and  possession  is.  nine  points 
of  the  law,  thank  Heaven  !  Now,  what  shall  we 
do  with  it?" 

"  O,  I  should  like  to  keep  it,"  said  Kate,  ear 
nestly  ;  "  that  is —  now  —  " 

"  Of  course  you  will  keep  it.     You  would  be 


188  FIRST  LOVE  IS  BEST. 

a  very  mercenary  girl  to  go  and  sell  it  after  I 
have  run  the  risk  of  my  life  to  prevent  its  being 
sold.  Besides,  I  shall  not  let  you.  I  am  a  Wo- 
man's-rights  man ! " 

"  That  you  are ! "  said  Kate,  energetically. 
"  One  of  a  thousand  !  " 

"So  the  farm  shall  not  be  sold;  that  is  de 
cided." 

"  Then  what  else  can  —  we  do  ?  " 

"  Ah,  that  is  a  sweet  word,  Katy.  That  little 
'  we '  pays  for  the  farm  twice  over." 

"  I  thought  it  was  men  who  kept  to  the  point," 
said  Kate,  shyly. 

"  Not  when  women  drop  little  golden  apples 
for  them  to  nibble  at." 

"  Please  to  nibble  at  my  farm,  then." 

"  What  shall  we  do  with  our  farm,  then  ? 
Well,  dear,  anything  that  will  give  us  pleasure 
to  think  of.  We  must  remember  that  this  is  the 
home  where  our  Katy  was  born,  and  where  she 
lived  all  her  happy  years,  and  grew  to  be  —  " 

"  O  now,  Mr.  Glynn,"  interrupted  Kate,  "  I 
am  not  anything  remarkable.  Please  not  think 
I  am,  because  you  will  surely  be  disappointed." 

"Remarkable!     Did  I  ever  accuse  you  of  it?" 

"  No  ;  "  blushing  a  little  ;  "  but  I  know  you 
were  going  to  say  something  —  not  very  wise." 

"  I  was  going  to  say  that  you  are  the  light 
of  my  eyes;  and  that  you  are,  and  you  can't 
swear  off.  If  this  be  folly,  make  the  most  of  it. 


A   SENTIMENTAL  SKETCH.  189 

Kate,  do  you  think  I  am  a  fool  to  be  loving 
you  so?" 

"  It  begins  to  look  like  it." 

"Well,— 

'  Among  all  the  follies  that  I  know, 
The  sweetest  folly  in  the  world  is  love.' 

Now  I  have  quoted  poetry  at  you ;  so  you  may 
be  sure  the  evidence  is  all  in.  Katy,  I  don't 
know  whether  you  are  remarkable.  I  don't  even 
know  whether  you  are  pretty.  I  only  know  that 
you  are  Katy  —  my  one  woman  in  all  the  world 
—  my  little  old  Katy-girl." 

"  I  will  tell  you  what  I  should  like  to  do  with 
the  house." 

"  What  house  ?  " 

"  The   one  you  bought   away  from   me  with 
malice  aforethought." 
"  Whose  house  now  ?  " 

"  O,  I  believe  it  is  a  sort  of  joint-stock  prop 
erty —  a  Glynn-Haviland  affair." 
"  Very  handsomely  spoken.     Go  on." 
"  I  am  afraid  you  will  think  it  foolish  and  im 
practicable,  but  I  don't  see  why  it  should  be." 
"  Nor  I  either."  + 

"  Why,  you  don't  know  what  it  is." 
"  I  assume  that  is  the  very  reason." 
"  O,  please  don't  laugh  at  me.     I  am  really  in 
earnest.     I  want  to  do  something  very  much.     I 
used  to  think  about  it  a  great  deal  before  —  long 
ago.     I  never  could  quite  see  how  to  bring  it 


190  FIRST  LOVE  IS  BEST. 

about,  but  I  used  to  picture  it  all  out  to  myself 
many  and  many  a  time.  And  now  I  think  per 
haps  it  may  be  possible ;  but  please  don't  laugh 
even  if  it  is  not." 

"I  promise  you  I  won't,  dear,  as  soon  as  I 
know  what  it  is.  I  only  laugh  because  I  am  in 
the  dark  and  have  nothing  else  to  do,  and  be 
cause  I  am  so  happy." 

"  Well,  you  know  the  charity-places  for  chil 
dren  in  Homes  and  Convents  and  such  places  ?  " 

u  I  have  seen  a  little  of  them ;  yes." 

"  Of  course  they  are  all  very  good,  and  there 
is  no  help  for  them,  but  they  seem  to  me  dread 
ful.  Do  you  not  think  they  are  dreadful  ?  " 

"  To  be  wholly  truthful,  Katy,  I  cannot  say 
that  I  ever  thought  much  about  them.  I  know 
there  are  such  places,  and  I  thought  it  was  a  fine 
thing  to  have  the  little  oafs  made  comfortable. 
But  I  can't  claim  any  credit  beyond  putting  my 
name  down  for  any  Institution  that  was  pre 
sented,  and  Heaven  knows  that  is  very  meagre 
credit." 

"  I  suppose,  naturally,  you  would  not  mind  it 
particularly,  but  to  me  it  always  seemed  dreadful 
to  have  little  children  in  an  institution.  They 
need  some  one  in  particular  so  much ;  and  to 
have  them  sleeping  all  in  rows,  and  living  all  in 
rooms  together,  and  only  one  place  to  play  in,  — 
it  looks  as  if  they  were  cheated  of  their  birth 
right." 


A   SENTIMENTAL  SKETCH.  191 

"My  dear  Kate,  if  you  knew  the  wretched 
ness  from  which  they  come." 

"And  the  impossibility  of  doing  otherwise. 
Yes.  But  what  if  I  could  do  a  little  other 
wise  ?  " 

"  What  could  you  do,  dear  ?  " 

"  Why  could  I  not  turn  my  house  —  " 

"  What  house  ?  " 

"  The  house  of  commons,"  smiled  Kate. 
"  Why  could  I  not  —  you  see,  Mr.  Gtynu,  I  can 
not  bear  to  think  of  —  of  its  going  the  way  of 
all  houses.  There  is  no  real  reason  why  it 
should  not.  It  is  not  that  it  is  better  than  other 
houses,  only  —  I  love  it  so." 

"  Perhaps  that  is  the  way  of  all  love,"  said 
Mr.  Glynn,  softly.  And  Kate  gave  him  a  grate 
ful  glance. 

"  And  so  I  do  not  like  to  think  of  some  one 
else  —  of  anybody  there.  O,  I  think  I  could 
not  bear  to  see  — "  and  poor  Kate's  voice  was 
choked  by  tender  memories. 

"  You  shall  not,"  -said  Mr.  Glynn,  hastily. 
"  Everything  shall  be  just  as  you  want  it  — just 
as  you  will  like  it  best." 

"  At  the  same  time,"  continued  Kate,  bravely 
recovering  herself,  "  I  do  not  want  it  to  be 
wasted.  That  would  not  be  better.  It  would 
not  be  pleasant  and  it  would  not  be  right." 

"  You  are  right,  dear  Katy." 

"Now,  then,  why  would  it  be  impracticable 


192  FIRST  LOVE  IS  BEST. 

for  me  to  find  three  or  four,  or  five  poor  little 
children  —  little  wee  children  —  even  little  bits 
of  babies,  the  smaller  the  better  —  enough  to 
make  a  nice  little  family  ;  not  a  hospital,  not  a 
regiment  of  them,  but  a  lovely  little  home  fam 
ily,  and  make  for  them  a  home  there  ?  I  think 
I  should  like  to  see  the  poor  little  innocents  tod 
dling  and  rolling  about  in  my  old  places ;  and 
there  they  could  be  real  children,  and  natural 
and  wild  and  bad,  you  know,  and  grow  up 
healthy  and  happy.  I  think  that  would  be  per 
petual  sunshine  and  blessing  falling  on  the 
dear  old  house.  O,  I  should  like  it  so  much !  " 
and  Katherine  clasped  her  hands  eagerly,  and 
looked  into  her  husband's  face  intently  for  his 
opinion. 

"  You  shall  certainly  have  your  liking,  Kate. 
Bless  your  sweet  heart  for  thinking  of  it !  " 

"  You  think  it  is  nice  yourself ;  do  you  not  ?  " 

"  I  think  it  is  very  charming  indeed." 

"  O,  thank  you  a  thousand,  thousand  times ! 
Not  in  the  way  you  don't  like,"  she  added, 
quickly,  "but  because  I  can't  help  it.  It  is  so 
nice  of  you  not  to  laugh  at  me  or  ask  me  down 
with  unanswerable  questions." 

"  Not  I.  I  am  too  much  relieved.  I  was  hor 
ribly  afraid  you  were  going  to  adopt  the  brats 
yourself." 

"  The  what  ?  "  queried  indignant  Kate. 

"  The  —  the  —  cherubs ; "  putting  up  his  hands 


A   SENTIMENTAL  SKETCH.  193 

as  if  to  ward  off  a  blow.  Kate  laughed,  but 
discreetly  concluded  to  accept  the  amendment. 

"  It  will  cost  a  great  deal  of  money.  Have 
you  thought  of  that?" 

"  But  I  have  married  a  woman  who  has  some 
money  in  her  own  right,  and  a  good  deal  more 
by  marriage.  Don't  grow  avaricious,  Kate.  I 
shall  be  disappointed  if  you  turn  out  to  be  a 
miserly  woman." 

"And  it  won't  be  all  expense,  because  there  is 
the  farm." 

"  Don't  try  to  get  out  of  it  that  way.  Do  you 
expect  the  infants  to  carry  on  the  farm  ? " 

"  No ;  but  the  farm  ought  to  carry  them  on, 
and  a  good  deal  more.  You  will  see.  You  may 
be  able  to  bank  better  than  I ;  but  I  know  all 
about  a  farm  —  witch-grass,  and  timothy,  and 
ploughing  in  clover,  and  seeding  down.  But 
then  I  don't  suppose  they  will  eat  much  but  milk 
for  a  good  while." 

"  Undoubtedly  the  consumption  of  witch-grass 
will  be  small  the  first  year  or  two ;  }~ou  are  right 
there.  See  what  it  is  to  have  a  knowledge  of 
farming — especially  baby-farming.  Who  is  to 
be  farm  superintendent?" 

"  There  is  not  going  to  be  any  superintendent. 

That  is  the  very  thing  I  don't  want.     Don't  you 

see  I  am  going  to  set  up  an  opposition  to  this 

forlorn   superintendence,  which  is  what  makes 

13 


194  FIRST  LOVE  IS  BEST. 

the  orphan-houses  so  dreary.  What  babies  need 
is  a  mother,  and  I  have  one  all  picked  out." 

"  You  have !  And  does  she  take  kindly  to 
being  picked  ?  " 

"She  will  as  soon  as  she  knows  it.  It  is 
Tishy's  daughter,  who  used  to  live  with  us.  The 
best  creature  !  Only  she  would  be  married." 

"  That  was  a  downfall." 

"  It  was  indeed,  for  he  was  a  wretch.  She 
never  would  have  looked  at  him,  for  she  had  a 
good  deal  of  sense  —  at  least  about  most  things. 
But  it  was  his  three  children.  She  could  not 
stand  the  temptation  of  those  children.  And 
she  thought  she  was  going  to  have  a  home,  poor 
thing !  O,  shall  I  not  make  Martha  a  happy 
woman  ?  And  Tishy  will  stay  and  keep  every 
thing  just  as  it  was.  This  I  could  not  have 
done  at  all.  This  is  your  doing ;  "  and  Kate 
fairly  beamed  upon  him. 

"  But,  my  dear,  are  you  sure  this  ne'er-do-weel 
of  hers  will  be  the  right  kind  of  man  to  have 
about  our  infantry  ?  " 

"  O,  he  is  gone.  Nobody  knows  where  he  is. 
He  went  away  and  left  his  three  children  for  her 
to  take  care  of;  and  then  her  own  little  baby 
was  born,  and  she  had  four  on  her  hands.  But 
it  was  just  as  well.  He  never  was  any  good 
—  only  to  throw  the  spare-rib  at  her  when  it  di  d 
not  suit  him." 


A   SENTIMENTAL  SKETCH.  195 

"  A  greasy  scamp !  And  what  is  become  of 
the  three  children  she  married?" 

"  I  believe  Tishy  engineered  them  upon  their 
mother's  relatives.  Tishy  was  enraged  with 
Martha  for  marrying,  but  after  he  went  away 
she  came  forward  and  said  she  would  take  care 
of  Martha  and  the  baby  ;  but  his  —  what  you 
call  cherubs  —  she  would  none  of.  So  as 
Martha  had  a  baby  of  her  own,  she  consented  to 
let  the  others  go.  She  is  fond  of  them,  too.  I 
suppose  she  would  like  to  have  them  here  with 
her,  but  I  will  not.  It  is  bad  blood;  and  be 
sides,  they  are  too  big,  and  they  are  already 
taken  care  of.  I  will  have  only  little,  helpless, 
friendless  midgets  that  don't  know  any  better. 
And  Martha  has  no  home,  and  she  is  a  beautiful 
housekeeper,  and  the  silliest  soft  heart  you  ever 
saw,  and  will  just  turn  slave  for  children.  She 
shall  have  —  how  many  do  you  suppose  she  can 
take  care  of  ?  No  ;  I  will  hunt  up  only  just  as 
many  as  she  can  be  a  real  mother  to.  O,  how 
shall  I  begin  ?  I  must  see  Tishy  instantly. 
You  will  help  me,  won't  you?  Not  about  Tishy, 
but  about  finding  the  children,  and  getting 
started.  I  won't  trouble  you.  in  the  least  after 
wards,  if  you  will  only  help  me  a  little  at  the 
beginning." 

"No.  I  certainly  shall  not  enter  into  any 
such  limited  partnership.  You  want  me  to 
throw  the  whole  weight  of  my  intellect  into  the 


196 


FIRST  LOVE  IS  BEST. 


business,  and  then  retire.  Thanks,  madam.  I 
enlist  for  the  war  or  I  enlist  not  at  all." 

"But  you  are  a  man,"  said  Kate,  frankly. 
"  You  won't  be  any  use.  Besides  that  I  did  not 
wish  to  trouble  you,  you  can't  do  anything." 

"  I  might  milk  the  cows  and  bring  the  wood." 

"  O,  you  may  do  anything  you  like  outside 
the  house.  I  was  only  thinking  of  the  inside. 
Yes,  certainly,  you  can  be  very  serviceable  in 
supporting  the  family." 

"  A  trifling  duty,  and  a  humble,  — but  still  — 
something." 


XII. 

old  project  of  Katharine's,  fanned  into 
JL  new  life,  gave  new  life  to  herself.  She 
had  Tishy  up  for  frequent  and  animated  con 
sultations,  and  found  in  her  an  enthusiastic 
partner. 

"  It  is  too  good  news  to  be  true,  Katherme," 
said  Tishy.  "  I  never  \vas  so  put  to't  in  my  life 
to  know  what  to  do." 

"  What  to  do  when,  Tishy  ?  " 

"  Ever  since  you  was  married,  dear.  Mr. 
Glynn  he  just  told  me  to  hold  on,  but  I  knew 
there  must  be  a  change  some  time." 

"  But,  you  dear  Tishy,  you  did  not  think  I 
should  let  you  be  turned  out-doors  ?  " 

"  Well,  of  course,  Katherwe,  I  wa'n't  going  to 
be  beholden  to  nobody.  Nor  I  don't  mean  that 
I  was  afraid  of  comin'  on  the  town.  I  have  got 
money  in  bank,  and  my  two  hands  into  the  bar 
gain.  But  it  is  dretful  hard  to  change,  dear,  at 
my  time  of  life." 

"  You  won't  call  this  a  change  ?  " 

197 


198  FIRST  LOVE  IS  BEST. 

"  Not  to  speak  of.  Nothin'  to  what  I  was 
afraid  of.  I  have  been  dretful  uneasy.  I  was 
afraid  you  might  want  me  to  come  up  here." 

44  Afraid,  Letitia  Midkius  \     And  I  here  !  " 

"  I  know,  dear  child,  but  you  are  young. 
'Twould  be  dretful  new  and  strange-like  for  me 
to  come  up  here  with  them  foreigners-like.  I 
have  had  my  swing  too  long  to  play  second 
fiddle." 

"  And  now,  Tishy,  you  will  play  first  fiddle 
in  your  own  house.  You  will  get  along  com 
fortably  with  Martha, —  won't  you?  You  and 
I  alwaj^s  got  along  well  together." 

44  You  and  I  ?  Lud-a-mercy  !  "  and  Tishy 
rivalled  Lord  Ronald  with  her  laugh  of  merry 
scorn.  44  You,  child?  Well,  you're  Mis'  Glynn 
now,  but  I  can't  realize  to  myself  you're  any 
thing  but  Katy." 

And  Tishy  laughed  again  at  the  idea  of  her 
getting  along  well  with  Kate  —  Kate  whom  she 
had  served  with  a  devotion  so  unswerving  and 
so  affectionate  that  it  never  called  itself  service. 

44  And  you  must  remember,  Tishy,  that  Mar 
tha  is  married  too,  and  has  a  son  of  her  own,  and 
must  be  treated  like  a  mother  as  well  as  like  a 
daughter." 

44  If  I  can't  manage  Martha  Midkins  without 
your  help,  Kather-ine  HavilamZ,  I  can't  with  —  " 
said  Tishy,  with  good-natured  but  very  Tishy-an 
asperity. 


A  SENTIMENTAL  SKETCH.  199 

"  Yes,"  said  Kate,  laughing ;  "  but  you  lorded 
it  over  us  both  so  long  when  we  were  under 
you,  that  I  am  afraid  you  will  forget  to  treat  us 
with  proper  respect." 

"  I  will  look  out  for  respect,  Mis'  Glynn  — 
I  suppose  that  is  respect.  But  if  you  think  I 
am  going  to  call  Martha  Midkins  Mis'  Bost- 
wick,  you  will  lose  your  guess,  I  can  tell  you. 
Ketch  me  calling  a  child  of  mine  after  one  of 
the  Old  Boy's  unaccountables,  if  she  married 
him  seven  times  over  !  r> 

"  Tishy,  that  is  the  only  misgiving  I  have  — 
for  fear  he  will  come  back  and  trouble  us." 

"  I  ain't  in  the  least  worried  about  that,"  said 
Tishy,  rocking  back  and  forth  in  her  chair,  teeth 
hard  set,  and  looking  altogether  vicious. 

"  But  if  he  should  come  ?  " 

"  I'll  pay  him  my  compliments  with  the  skillet. 
It's  what  I  ought  to  a'  done  in  the  first  place. 
Instead  of  which  I  tried  to  reason  with  Martha. 
But,  Lord!  I  didn't  rightly  know  what  carron 
he  was  then." 

"  Very  well,  Tishy,  I  will  come  down  as  soon 
as  I  possibly  can  and  look  over  the  rooms,  and 
we  will  see  what  needs  to  be  done  ;  and  I  think 
Martha  better  come  as  soon  as  she  can.  Now 
you  remember,  won't  you,  that  Martha  is  to  be 
the  mother  and  you  the  matron.  And  you  won't 
encroach  upon  her  —  will  you  ?  " 

"  Lord  love  you,  child !  Martha  is  Martha,  and 


200  FIRST  LOVE  IS  BEST. 

I  am  Tishy,  and  I  ain't  likely  to  forget  it,  nor 
she  nuther.  Don't  you  worry.  But  I  wanted 
to  tell  you,  and  come  nigh  forgettin',  that  there's 
a  poor  creetur  up  there  near  Avhere  Martha  lives. 
She  was  a  weak,  washy  little  thing —  never  had 
no  hold  onto  her.  I  used  to  tell  'em  she'd  ketch 
cold  going  to  bed  barefoot.  Well,  her  hus 
band  he  was  a  carpenter  —  a  clever  sort  of  man 
enough,  but  no  faculty  —  never  forehanded,  and 
he  fell  from  a  roof  now  goin'  on  three  months 
ago,  and  only  lived  about  a  week,  and  his  wife 
she  went  into  a  gallopin'  consumption,  and  last 
week  she  died,  and  there's  the  baby  just  four 
months  old  —  a  poor  little  pindlin'  thing  that 
must  go  to  the  poor-house,  and  that  means  the 
grave.  Martha  she  has  nussed  it  the  last  week, 
but,  Lor  !  thinks  I,  there's  a  windfall  for  Kath- 
erme." 

"I  don't  know  about  taking  such  a  baby," 
reflected  Kate. 

"  Why,  it  is  the  Lord's  poorest,"  said  Tishy, 
piously. 

"  True  ;  but  I  am  afraid  it  will  die,  and  then 
we  shall  be  discouraged.  Don't  you  think  we 
ought  to  begin  with  babies  that  will  live?  " 

"  Wh}7,  law,  Katy,  no  babies  don't  have  a  sure 
lease  of  life,  and  sometimes  the  ones  you  least 
expect  it  of  clings  the  longest  and  strongest." 

"  But  you  say  this  poor  baby's  mother  died  of 
consumption  ?  " 


A  SENTIMENTAL   SKETCH.  201 

"  So  she  did  ;  but  consumption  ain't  ketching." 

"  Only,  Tishy,  it  seems  as  if  it  is  as  much  as 
ever  a  baby  can  live,  any  way,  little  weak  thing  ! 
and  if  it  is  born  to  consumption,  there  isn't  much 
hope." 

"  O,  law  now,  Katy,  you're  all  out  there. 
You've  no  idea  what  a  sight  of  hold-on  there 
is  in  babies.  Why,  they  live  through  what 
would  kill  a  grown  man.  You  see  they  haven't 
no  nerves  and  no  worries,  and  they  only  have  to 
take  what  comes,  nor  never  fret  about  to-morrow. 
Very  like  the  child  took  all  the  health  the  poor 
mother  had,  and  left  her  to  die  ;  but  the  child 
will  grow  up  into  an  old  woman." 

"  Very  well ;  if  you  think  the  chances  are  that 
she  will  live,  we  will  take  her." 

"  There's  no  chance  at  all  she  will  live  if  we 
don't  take  her.  She's  dying  daily  where  she  is 
now,  and  the  poor-house  '11  fetch  her  up.  But 
then,  if  she  dies,  it  will  do  no  harm  to  ease 
her  off." 

"  Certainly ;  but  what  I  think  is,  the  babies 
that  die  go  quickly  into  the  hands  of  the  good 
God,  and  are  sure  to  be  happy  there.  But  those 
that  live  must  take  what  comes,  and  so  they 
ought  to  be  well  furnished  with  health  and  good 
principles  and  good  habits.  If  we  could  take 
them  all,  we  would  ;  but  as  we  can  only  have  a 
very  few,  I  don't  think  we  can  afford  to  waste 
ourselves  on  those  who  are  going  to  be  happy 


202  FIRST  LOVE  IS  BEST. 

in  Heaven  so  soon.  We  must  help  those  who 
must  stay  here.  That  is  not  hard-hearted, 
Tishy,  don't  you  see,  though  it  sounds  sort  of 
business-like." 

"  O,  well,  Katy,  you  can't  tell  who  is  going  to 
live  and  who  isn't.  We  must  just  trust  the  Lord 
for  that.  And,  besides,  wouldn't  it  be  sunthin' 
to  take  a  poor  peaked  baby  and  build  him  up 
till  he's  as  strong  and  frisky  and  antic  as  a 
kitten  ?  " 

"  Yes,  if  he  is  suffering  only  from  want  of  care, 
and  can  be  cured  into  firm  health.  But  if  he  is 
inwardly  sick  and  weak,  and  can  only  be  kept  in 
a  feeble  half-and-half  life,  I  think  I  would  not  do 
that.  I  think  I  would  let  him  die." 

"  Why,  Kitty,  you  frighten  me  !  " 

*'  O,  I  will  not  kill  any  of  your  babies,  Tishy, 
don't  fear.  But,  don't  you  see,  where  is  the  fun 
of  being  miserable  ?  Why  should  any  one  live 
in  disease  and  discomfort  ?  " 

"  But,  don't  you  know  the  Lord  works  some 
of  his  mightiest  wonders  in  poor,  feeble  folks 
that  never  did  a  day's  work  in  their  lives,  nor 
knew  a  minute  free  of  pain  ?  " 

"  O,  I  know  he  does  not  actually  throw  us 
overboard  when  we  have  made  wrecks  of  our 
selves.  But,  all  the  same,  Tishy,  I  want  to  take 
care  of  the  children  that  have  got  to  live  whether 
or  no,  or  that  have  bodies  at  least  worth  saving. 
So  you  better  look  out  and  keep  your  charges  in 


A  SENTIMENTAL   SKETCH.  203 

good  condition,  or  I  shall  gobble  them  up  some 
fine  morning." 

Kate  had  not  expected  to  open  her  nursery 
quite  so  soon,  but  Mr.  Glynn  agreed  with  her 
that  the  prompt  appearance  and  the  unquestion 
able  forlornness  of  this  very  young  person  were 
signs  not  to  be  disregarded.  Tishy  indeed  de 
clared  that  she  would  rather  begin  with  the  two, 
and  get  the  hang  of  it,  than  have  all  come  to 
gether.  So  then  it  became  necessary  for  Kate 
to  visit  the  old  house  at  once.  She  had  not 
entered  it  since  she  passed  out  from  its  shelter 
on  the  morning  of  her  marriage. 

"  I  am  going  with  you,"  said  Mr.  Glynn,  when 
she  asked  him  for  the  keys  of  some  of  the  rooms 
which  had  been  closed  at  Tishy's  request. 

She  could  not  help  it  that  a  blank  disappoint 
ment  fell  for  a  moment  on  her  face  at  this  an 
nouncement,  and  he  could  not  help  it  that  his 
eyes  darkened  with  a  sudden  pain  at  that  un 
intentional  avowal.  Yet  he  had  been  as  well 
aware  of  her  preference  as  if  she  had  spoken  it. 
But  she  put  down  her  disappointment  instantly, 
and  he  thrust  back  the  useless  regret. 

"  I  knew  you  would  rather  go  alone,"  he  said, 
simply,  "  but  indeed  I  cannot  let  you." 

"  I  only  thought  of  going  alone,"  said  Kate,  as 
simply,  "  but  it  does  not  hurt  me  to  have  you 
go ;  "  and  then  they  walked  down  the  silent 
road  tosrether. 


204  FIRST  LOVE  IS  BEST. 

Afterwards  Kate  felt  that  it  was  well  she  had 
been  companioned.  The  little  restraint  helped 
her  to  self-possession.  Mr.  Glynn  had  ordered 
all  the  rooms  to  be  opened  ;  cheerful  fires  were 
burning,  and  the  familiar  sunshine  flooded  the 
familiar  rooms.  It  would  have  been  a  luxury  to 
Kate  to  sit  alone  in  the  silence  and  solitude,  and 
dream  herself  back  into  the  irrecoverable  past ; 
but  it  would  not  have  been  strengthening,  and 
what  Kate  wanted  now  was  strength.  So  it 
was  well  that  she  could  not  abandon  herself 
to  tender  and  sorrowful  recollections,  while  yet 
she  felt  herself  held  back  only  by  the  most 
heartfelt  sympathy  and  consideration  to  which 
she  was  in  honor  bound  to  respond  with  defer 
ence  at  least.  And  while  every  word  and  look 
of  her  husband's  was  softened  with  the  memory 
of  the  past,  he  gradually,  almost  imperceptibly, 
won  her  to  think  and  speak  of  the  future,  so 
that  somehow  the  tearful  and  tender  forms  of 
a  vanished  home  melted  into  the  bright  and 
beckoning  fancies  of  joyful  promise,  and  Kate's 
vision  peopled  the  rooms  with  dimpled  figures, 
round,  rosy  faces  laughed  up  at  her  from  the 
cosy  corners,  and  hope  and  cheer  nestled  in  the 
nooks  that  she  had  feared  to  find  so  desolate. 
It  was  only  the  old  story  of  the  chilled  traveller 
warmed  and  saved  by  the  loving  effort  lavished 
on  his  frozen  comrade. 


XIII. 

TTEARTENED  and  energized  by  her  success- 
_LJL  ful  activity  in  this  direction,  Kate  next 
turned  her  energetic  attention  to  the  house, 
which  was  now  her  own  home.  It  was  old  and 
square,  and  spacious  and  stately,  with  broad  pi 
azzas  for  summer  shade,  and  broad  balconies  for 
winter  sunshine  ;  low-roofed  and  heavily  raftered, 
with  ample  corridors  and  a  hospitable  hall,  and 
wide,  welcoming  rooms  ;  and  wise  beyond  its 
generation  in  great,  windowed  closets  with  over 
grown  drawers  and  sweet-smelling  chests.  The 

o  o 

debris  of  a  seafaring  and  foreign-trading  ancestry 
had  drifted  down  the  years,  and  lay  scattered 
about  in  jars  of  priceless  value,  huge  and  hideous, 
convolute  with  dragons  and  serpents  and  scaly 
monsters  in  heat  of  fiercest  action  ;  chairs  and 
tables  curiously  twisted  of  bamboo  work,  or  end 
lessly  carved  in  a  gloom  of  massive  blackness ; 
wondrously  wrought  cabinets ;  inlaid  boxes,  iri 
descent  with  mother-of-pearl ;  lustrous  trays  be- 
skirnmed  by  impossible  birds,  berayed  with  the 

205 


206  FIRST  LOVE  IS  BEST. 

golden  glint  of  impossible  suns ;  many-folded 
screens,  brilliant  with  peacocks  and  butterflies 
and  slender-legged  storks  in  radiant  embroidery 
of  vivid  silk  and  shining  gold ;  caskets  polished 
and  quaint,  opening  one  within  another,  like  a 
fairy  story,  or  hiding  each  its  treasure  of  fra 
grant  fan,  or  hieroglyphic  silk,  or  mystic  neck 
lace,  or  ivory  ball  and  bauble  cunningly  carven, 
sphere  within  sphere.  Wider  travel,  cosmopoli 
tan  taste,  and  the  Great  Exposition,  have  brought 
these  things  home  to  men's  business  and  bosoms 
—  especially  to  women's;  but  to  Kate  they  were 
utterly  novel  and  fascinating  —  like  a  peep  into 
the  Orient  itself.  Her  earliest  convalescence  had 
dallied  languidly  with  such  curiosities  as  lay 
around  her,  and  with  each  fresh  accession  of 
health  she  penetrated  further  into  the  fastnesses 
of  the  house,  freshly  enchanted  with  each  new 
discovery,  till  the  faint,  sweet,  pungent,  musty 
old  sandal-wood  smells  seemed  the  verj-  breath 
of  Araby  the  Blest,  wooing  her  over  purple  seas 
to  the  grotesque  Barbaric  Lands.  The  wide 
waste  of  garret,  uncrossed  by  partition-walls, 
was  itself  a  museum.  It  was  not  simply  that  the 
taste  for  bric-a-brac  had  not  then  become  a  fash 
ion,  but  the  absence  of  any  mistress  of  the  house 
had  rather  ruled  out  taste  and  banished  to  the 
garret's  safe  shelter  much  that  was  rare  and  per 
ishable.  The  burden  of  broken  crockery  and 
yellowing  silk  and  moth-eaten  tissue  weighed 


A   SENTIMENTAL  SKETCH.  207 

heavily  on  the  righteous  American  soul  of  the 
good  housekeeper,  and  many  a  bit  of  exquisite 
porcelain  had  mounted  from  mantel  and  cabinet 
and  the  flirt  of  the  chambermaid's  duster  to  the 
strong,  solid  cupboards  of  this  unvisited  wilder 
ness.  Persian  rugs,  heavy  and  dense  and  dim, 
with  blended  beauty  of  hue,  had  been  folded 
away  in  camphor,  against  summer  depredations, 
and  been  deliberately  forgotten  upon  return  of 
winter,  wasting  their  dusk  splendor  in  cedar 
chests.  India  shawls,  faded  and  soft ;  creamy 
crape,  overswept  with  dense  floriage  and  foliage 
of  silken  handiwork;  golden-fretted  velvet  and 
finest  silken  sheen,  that  had  draped  the  fair  forms 
of  dead  women,  were  folded  into  forgetfulness 
beneath  the  cobwebbed  eaves.  The  sweet  dead 
women  had  passed  away,  and  of  their  memory 
remained  to  Kate  not  so  much  as  a  name ;  but 
she  left  all  reverently,  as  it  lay,  undisturbed. 
She  was  too  new  a  comer,  she  was  too  much  of 
the  outer  world  to  touch  the  inbreathed  life  of 
these  personal  belongings.  But  what  else  was 
there  she  inspected  with  fearless  minuteness. 
Many  an  unheeded  hour  she  spent  over  vases 
and  bowls,  and  nondescript  bits  of  translucent 
fabric  and  spirited  drawing  and  marvellous  chan 
ging  color.  A  tiny  tea-set,  the  very  soul  of  fra 
gile  loveliness,  made  her  fall  a-moaning  with 
delight.  And  one  day  Mr.  Glynn  coming  home 
unexpectedly  early  from  town,  vainly  hunting 


208  FIRST  LOVE  IS  BEST. 

for  Katherine,  followed  the  clue  of  the  open 
garret-door,  and  came  upon  her  shawled  and 
muffled,  and  crouching  before  a  motley  group  of 
Chinese  mandarins,  beggars,  mugs,  and  vases. 

"  At  your  devotions,  Kitty.  Saying  your 
prayers  to  your  little  gods.  So  I  have  been 
harboring  a  pagan." 

"I  did  not  know  you  had  got  home,"  said  Kate. 
"  I  am  trying  to  draw  this  high-shouldered  jar 
for  Aunt  Fanny  ;  the  shape  is  so  lovely.  I  am 
making  sad  work  of  it  I  know ; "  as  Mr.  Glynn 
looked  over  her  shoulder  ;  "  but  it  will  give  her 
some  idea." 

"  You  have  blocked  the  shape  out  very  accu 
rately.  Are  you  going  to  try  to  capture  those 
fellows  cavorting  across  the  bulge  ?  " 

"  I  have  been  studying  those.  Is  that  a  man 
in  the  boat,  and  are  those  two  women  in  the 
water,  and  is  he  trying  to  get  away  from  them 
frightened  ?  Or  are  they  frightened,  and  he 
mocking  them,  and  they  begging  him  ?  " 

"  Life-like,  to  give  such  scope  for  argument  — 
but  /  am  frightened,"  feeling  her  purple-cold 
hands.  "  Katy,  you  are  thoroughly  chilled  I  You 
must  not  do  this.  You  must  come  down  in 
stantly." 

"  No  indeed.  Don't  be  disagreeable.  I  come 
up  every  day,  and  it  does  not  hurt  me  in  the 
least.  No  ;  I  won't  go  down  till  I  have  fin 
ished;"  clutching  her  paper,  laughingly,  as  Mr. 


A   SENTIMENTAL  SKETCH.  209 

Glynn  would  have  taken  it  from  her.  Whereat, 
without  further  protest,  he  quietly  picked  up 
sketch,  artist,  and  all,  and  carried  them  down 
stairs  together.  It  might  be  considered  a  friv 
olous  attempt  at  wit  to  sa}r  that  Katherine  was 
very  much  taken  aback  ;  but  she  had  the  pres 
ence  of  mind  not  further  to  sacrifice  her  dignity 
by  resisting. 

"  There,"  said  Mr.  Glynn,  debarking  her  be 
fore  the  library  fire,  "  that  is  the  way  we  Blue 
beards  treat  our  wives  when  they  don't  obey 
us." 

"  And  you  call  yourself  a  Woman's-rights 
man?" 

"What  do  you  call  it?" 

"  A  rose  by  any  other  name  would  be  more 
correct." 

"  But  could  not  be  sweeter.  "Why  don't  you 
have  that  truck  brought  down  stairs  into  a  Chris 
tian  climate  if  you  want  to  see  it  ?  " 

"  O  !  there  is  so  much  of  it." 

"  Room  enough  here." 

"  And  I  have  not  thought  of  it.  I  have  nofc 
been  cold,  really.  Only  my  hands  were  cold  be 
cause  I  could  not  wear  my  gloves.  You  need  not 
be  afraid.  I  do  not  wish  to  be  sick  again  any 
more  than  you  wish  to  have  me." 

"  But  you  must  not  continue  these  garret  ex 
plorations  ;  not  till  warm  weather." 

"  I  will  tell  you  what  I  should  like  to  do,"  she 
14 


210  FIRST  LOVE  IS  BEST. 

exclaimed  suddenly.  "  It  has  been  coming  into 
my  mind  a  long  time,  and  it  is  all  in  now." 

"  Out  with  it,  then." 

"  I  have  a  strong  impulse  to  commit  sacrilege. 
I  suppose  it  is  that." 

"  Upon  my  word,  Katy,"  said  he,  surveying 
her  critically,  —  her  hair  was  somewhat  rough 
ened,  her  dress  somewhat  tumbled,  her  face  aglow 
with  fervent  heat  after  the  long  cold,  and  she  had 
a  mingled  air  of  adventure,  resolution,  and  spar- 
Ide, —  "  upon  my  word,  you  look  at  this  moment 
capable  of  achieving  anything  you  undertake. 
You  surely  won't  need  any  assistance  from  me  in 
rifling  a  church." 

"  It  is  only  the  church  in  thy  house  that  I  want 
to  rifle." 

"  Whose  house  ?  " 

"  Philemon's !  " 

"  Checkmate." 

"  I  suppose  you  want  everything  in  this  house 
to  stay  just  as  it  is." 

"  Only  you,  Katy.  I  want  you  to  stay  just  as 
you  are.  Everything  else  may  slide." 

"  And  I  am  the  very  thing  that  will  change. 
I  shall  grow  wrinkled,  and  my  teeth  will  come 
out,  and  my  hair  will  get  gray,  and  I  shall  have 
an  ear-trumpet  and  4  roomatiz '  ;  and  that  is  the 
time  when  I  shall  depend  upon  your  liking  me 
vastly.  It  is  not  much  matter  now  ;  but  then  I 
expect  you  to  come  out  strong." 


A   SENTIMENTAL  SKETCH.  211 

"  I  must  begin  now,  then,  so  as  to  get  my 
hand  in." 

"  I  want  to  tell  you  what  I  should  like  to  do." 

"  That  is  just  what  I  am  pining  to  hear." 

"  But  I  am  really  afraid  that  you  will  not 
like  it." 

"  I  promise  faithfully  not  to  murder  you,  in  any 
case.  I  will  not  even  imprison  you  in  your  cham 
ber  with  one  grim  warden  for  the  remainder  of 
your  life." 

"  Will  you  promise  not  to  be  in  the  least  degree 
vexed,  or  even  inwardly  annoyed,  or  think  I  am 
finding  fault  or  want  to  break  things  ?  " 

"  So  completely  that  even  if  you  do  break 
them  I  am  ready  to  swear  you  did  it  as  a  military 
necessity." 

"  I  think  this  is  a  beautiful  house,  a  most  inter 
esting  house.  I  don't  want  to  alter  it  in  the  least 
particle  —  not  to  harm  it;  but  I  should  like  to  — 
develop  it ;  you  understand  ?  " 

"  I  shall,  as  soon  as  you  have  enlightened  me  a 
little  more." 

"  I  used  to  think  about  it  when  I  was  getting 
well ;  just  lie  and  think  idly  of  this  and  that  as 
my  eyes  happened  to  fall.  You  did  not  suspect 
you  were  nursing  such  a  viper  back  into  life,  did 
you  ?  But  I  had  no  plan,  really  ;  only  idle,  sick 
fancies.  But  now  I  am  all  alive  and  awake  and 
well." 

"  You  look  like  it." 


212  .      FIRST  LOVE  IS  BEST. 

"And  as  a  —  a  —  housekeeper,"  said  Kate, 
blushing  and  hesitating  a  little,  "  of  course  I 
must  know  everything  and  do  everything." 

"  So  that  is  the  limited  scale  on  which  the  op 
pressed  sex  acts,"  sighed  Mr.  Glynn. 

"And  if  I  say  there  are  some  —  incongruities  — 
in  the  house,  you  will  not  mind  it." 

"I  will  fling  them  out  of  window.  I  never 
ordered  an  incongruity  into  my  house  in  my  life." 

"  No  ;  it  was  Mrs.  Palker.  She  told  me  her 
self,  dear  soul,  as  innocently  as  possible.  She  was 
only  too  conscientious  and  careful.  But  I  would 
rather  have  things  where  I  could  see  them  and 
enjoy  them,  even  if  they  do  get  broken  and  worn ; 
would  not  you  ?  " 

"  Certainly." 

"  When  I  first  came  here  it  looked  —  I  am 
afraid  you  will  not  quite  understand." 

"  I  will  make  a  violent  effort." 

"  Cold  and  cheerless  —  a  little.  I  was  so  sick 
and  faint-hearted,  I  had  no  courage.  I  am  not 
complaining  ;  don't  think  that.  Every  one  was 
as  kind  as  could  be.  But  the  very  sun  seemed 
gone." 

"  I  know  you  had  a  hard  old  time  of  it." 

"  And  on  the  top  of  it  all  I  was  sentimental. 
That  was  silly,  but  I  could  not  help  it  then.  And 
this  kept  going  through  and  through  my  mind : 

'  They've  made  her  a  grave  too  cold  and  damp 
For  a  soul  so  warm  and  true.' " 


A   SENTIMENTAL  SKETCH.  £13 

"You  poor  little  Kitty  !  " 

"  O,  that  was  only  sentimental,"  said  Kate, 
surveying  her  past  self  loftily  from  towering 
heights  of  superiority.  "You  don't  mind  my 
telling  you  this  now  ?  " 

"  I  want  you  to  tell  me  everything." 

"  Now,"  said  Kate,  "  I  can  see,  not  by  melan 
choly,  but  as  a  matter  of  fact,  that  the  house  is 
a  little  dark  and  gloomy ;  but  it  need  not  be. 
And  it  is  a  little  —  not  to  say  —  dingy  —  O  !  " 

"  Dingy  —  eh  ?  "  said  Mr.  Glynn,  with  the 
utmost  good-humor.  Dingy  was  not  half  so 
dreadful  a  word  to  him  as  it  was  to  Kate. 

"  Not  an  antique,  Oriental  dingy,  but  —  " 

"Dirty-dingy!" 

"  Well,  a  worn  dingy  at  least." 

"And  American  dirt  is  so  much  less  pictu 
resque  a  thing  than  Persian  or  Turkish  grime. 
Item :  to  order  scrubbing-brushes." 

"  No,  indeed.  That  would  not  do  at  all.  Mrs. 
Palker  is  very  neat.  She  would  surely  slay  us. 
That  is  not  the  kind  I  mean.  It  does  not  look 
fresh  and  cheerful.  And  where  it  is  fresh,  it  is 
—  horrid,"  said  Kate,  candidly. 

"  That  is  right,  Kitty,"  laughed  Mr.  Glynn ; 
"  free  your  mind." 

"  Now  in  my  room  there  are  many  things  that 
are  exquisite  —  well,  poetic,  finer  than  I  ever 
saw  in  my  life  before.  But  it  is  spoiled  by  such 
an  ever-present  carpet.  I  would  far  rather  have 


214  FIRST  LOVE  IS  BEST. 

Tishy's  rag-carpet  that  she  wove  herself.  All 
the  time  I  was  sick  I  could  not  help  staring  at 
it.  I  think  I  might  have  got  well  sooner  if  that 
had  not  given  me  a  congestion  of  the  brain.  I 
don't  mind  it  now  I  am  well.  And  Mrs.  Palker 
told  me  twenty  times  the  tale  of  her  search 
for  it." 

"  Item  :  a  new  carpet  for  Katy's  room,  and  to 
fend  off  Mrs.  Palker." 

"And  not  hurt  her  feelings.  But  I  don't 
want  to  buy  things.  I  never  thought  of  that. 
If  you  would  let  me  bring  the  wasting  sweetness 
down  from  the  attic.  That  garret  is  a  perfect 
treasure-house.  It  is  only  that  the  rooms  are 
big,  and  that  makes  them  look  bare,  and  that 
makes  them  look  dreary.  And  some  of  them 
are  so  hermetically  sealed,  and  they  haunt  me. 
I  do  believe  the  house  has  been  emptied  into  the 
garret.  Everything  down-stairs  is  fine,  and  rich, 
and  pretty  —  " 

"  Except  what  is  cheap  and  nasty." 
"  Exactly.  Now  if  you  would  be  willing  to 
let  me  open  the  house  ;  make  it  look  open,  and 
bring  those  heathen  gods  and  their  trappings 
down  into  the  inhabited  country,  they  would 
become  household  gods.  I  believe  myself  that 
they  all  belong  here." 

"  They  certainly  do  if  you  order  them  down." 
"  A  man  does  not  know  how  to  take  care  of 
himself,  does  he  ?  " 


A   SENTIMENTAL  SKETCH.  215 

"Not  the  least  in  life.  I  don't  quite  know 
whither  you  are  tending,  but  I  strive  to  double 
and  turn  fast  enough  to  keep  you  in  sight." 

"  You  say  that  because  you  do  not  choose  to 
fight.  But  it  is  a  solemn  truth.  I  have  dis 
covered  it  since  —  since  I  knew  you  better.  I 
have  discovered  many  things  since  I  came  here. 
Now  listen.  I  am  about  to  utter  an  immortal 
saying :  A  man  can  take  care  of  a  woman  a  great 
deal  better  than  a  woman  can  take  care  of  her 
self  ;  but  also  a  woman  can  take  care  of  a  man 
a  great  deal  better  than  a  man  can  take  care  of 
himself!  "  and  Kate  nodded  defiantly. 

"  That  is  a  saying  worthy  of  immortality," 
returned  Mr.  Glynn,  with  a  solemn  and  respon 
sive  nod.  "  Show  your  faith  by  your  works." 

"  That  is  what  I  wish  to  do,"  said  Katherine. 
"  You  are  the  application  of  my  text.  Here  are 
you,  saying,  no  doubt,  in  your  mind  this  very 
minute,  how  absurd  it  is  for  me  to  set  up  that  I 
can  dispose  of  this  house  better  than  you  who 
have  lived  in  it  for  generations.  But  I  can  turn 
this  house  upside  down  in  a  fortnight  so  you 
won't  know  it.  I  can  do  it,  Mr.  Glynn.  You 
don't  know  what  you  are  talking  about  —  but  I 
can  do  it !  " 

"  Talking  about !  I  don't  even  know  I  am 
talking.  It  seems  to  me  I  am  in  the  grasp  of 
a  young  goddess  who  threatens  to  tumble  my 


216  FIRST  LOVE  IS  BEST. 

roof  about  my  ears,  and  looks  as  if  she  could 
make  her  word  good." 

"How  strange  it  is  to  be  a  man!  Of  course 
you  were  the  master  of  all,  yet  it  was  Mrs. 
Palker  who  ruled  and  reigned." 

"  Still  it  was  an  autocracy  tempered  with 
indulgence.  Let  me  beg  you  to  remember  that 
and  be  merciful." 

"  O,  I  am  not  blaming  Mrs.  Palker.  She  is  as 
nice  as  possible  —  that  is,  nice  enough  for  —  for 
Mrs.  Palker.  But  why  did  you  not  care  about 
things?  Did  she  just  go  her  own  way  without 
consulting  you  ?  " 

"  O,  no ;  she  often  comes  to  consult  me  ;  but 
she  seldom  has  time  to  hear  my  opinion  —  barely 
time  to  express  her  own." 

"  I  suppose  she  would  not  like  very  well  to 
have  the  hands  on  her  dial  reversed?  " 

"  I  believe  she  is  to  resume  a  husband  soon,  so 
she  will  not  be  a  constitutional  objection." 

"  Yes  ;  she  told  me  she  expected  to  change  her 
situation  soon,  and  then  she  should  work  no 
more." 

"  If  she  would  stop  talking,  too,  it  would  make 
quite  a  difference.  I  think  she  talks  more  accord 
ing  to  what  she  says  than  most  of  my  acquaint 
ance  put  together.  But  she  is  perfectly  harmless, 
Katy.  What  next?  " 

"  Why,  next  —  next  —  "    said  Kate,    looking 


A    SENTIMENTAL  SKETCH.  217 

around.  "  Seems  to  me  this  room  ought  to  be 
humanized.  ' 

"  This  ?  O,  my  dear,  now  I  think  this  room 
is  perfect;"  and  Mr.  Glynn  surveyed  it  with 
serene  satisfaction.  "Reform,  take  any  shape 
but  that." 

"  It  is  a  room  capable  of  perfection,"  said 
Kate  judicially;  "but  its  light  is  hidden  at 
present  under  a  bushel,  under  a  great  many 
bushels.  It  is  dark,  and  light,  and  romantic —  " 

"  And  ever  so  convenient.  It  is  a  rendezvous 
for  all  my  wants.  There  's  a  place  for  every 
thing—  " 

"  And  everything  in  it.:' 

"Well,  at  least,  then,  one  is  sure  to  come 
across  it  in  time.  Ah,  Katy,  I  think  you  must 
leave  me  to  taste  the  sweets  of  liberty  here." 

"  I  don't  know.  If  the  mania  for  improve 
ment  fairly  gets  possession  of  me,  I  won't  promise 
1  can  keep  my  hands  off  you." 

"  Don't  try,"  he  said,  stretching  out  both  arms 
towards  her. 

"  You  would  not  like,"  said  Kate  smiling,  but 
not  choosing  to  see  his  gesture,  "  to  be  Gid 
eon's  fleece,  untouched  when  all  the  rest  of  the 
world  is  dewy.  And  I  was  struck  by  a  mighty 
leathery  odor  when  I  was  in  your  dressing-room 
a  little  while  ago." 

"You  were?"  said  Mr.  Glynn,  innocently. 
"I  can't  think  where  it  came  from." 


218  FIRST  LOVE  IS  BEST. 

"  Nor  I,  for  there  were  only  eleven  pairs  of 
shoes  'on  the  closet-floor." 

'•I  know.  I  always  keep  my  stated  supply 
under  the  lounge." 

"Yes.  I  saw  them  peeping  out.  Peeping 
out?  Creeping  out,  tumbling  out,  fighting  out. 
Eight  pairs  more.  What  makes  you  wear  so 
many  shoes?  " 

"  I  don't  wear  them  all  at  once,  ma'am." 

"But  why  do  you  wear  them  all  at  nineteen 
times  ?  " 

"  Upon  my  word,  Katy,  I  don't  know.  I  give 
it  up.  But  I  suppose  one  must  have  some 
amusement  living  alone,  and  I  take  it  out  in 
shoes.  Your  coming  puts  a  different  face  on  the 
matter.  Item:  to  build  a  new  wing  on  the 
north  end  to  accommodate  shoes.  What  are 
you  going  to  root  me  out  of  next?  This  is 
getting  exhilarating." 

"  This  is  only  beginning.  Things  will  do 
themselves  when  they  are  fairly  started.  And 
I  understand  that  you  give  me  leave  to  rage 
through  the  house  ?  " 

"  How  can  I  give  you  leave,  Katy  ?  The 
house  is  yours  —  the  pottery  and  trumpery  are 
yours.  All  is  yours.  Shall  you  not  do  what 
you  will  with  your  own  ?  " 

"It  does  not  seem  so,"  said  Katherine,  sud 
denly  overcast. 

He  was  leaning  back  in  the  large  library-chair 


A   SENTIMENTAL   SKETCH.  219 

looking  up  at  her  as  she  stood  before  him,  rosy, 
intent,  alert,  a  little  disordered  in  dress  and  hair, 
but  the  very  picture  of  fresh,  eager  life,  with  the 
turbulent  sensitiveness  of  girlhood  flooding  her 
cheeks  and  veiling  her  eyes  that  slvyly  avoided 
his  serious  and  tender  gaze.  He  took  her  hand 
and  drew  her  to  him.  He  laid  her  soft,  cool 
palm  on  his  forehead  and  pressed  close  the  "  tired 
ej^elids  upon  tired  eyes."  Kate's  cheeks  were 
suffused  with  a  deeper  crimson,  but  she  stood  by 
her  guns  manfully. 

"Have  you  the  headache?"  she  presently 
asked,  softly,  for  want  of  something  better  to  say. 

He  shook  his  head,  then  gently  removed  her 
hand  and  put  her  away  from  him,  and  Kate  left 
the  room  quite  awed  and  confounded. 

"  O,  what  have  I  done  ?  "  she  bethought  her 
self,  in  the  swiftly  sought  solitude  of  her  own 
chamber.  "  I  did  not  think  that  he  would  care. 
I  did  not  mean  anything  that  would  be  unpleas 
ant  to  him,  or  that  he  would  not  like.  But  I 
suppose  he  has  lived  here  so  long,  and  is  attached 
to  everything  just  as  it  is,  and  the  thought  of 
change  pains  him  ;  and  he  thinks  that  I  am  dis 
satisfied.  O,  I  wish  he  would  know  that  I  do 
not  really  care  !  Of  course  it  is  all  very  dear  to 
him  here.  I  suppose  I  should  not  have  been 
pleased  to  have  any  one  come  in  and  overhaul 
things  at  home.  Mine  !  As  if  that  made  any 
difference  !  As  if  I  could  take  any  pleasure  in 


220  FIRST  LOVE  IS  BEST. 

it  if  it  should  give  him  annoyance.  How  sorry 
I  am  I  ever  mentioned  it  or  thought  of  it !  " 

The  upshot  of  Katharine's  perturbations  and 
meditations  was  that  she  went  boldly  back  into 
the  library. 

"  Mr.  Glynn,  do  let  me  take  it  all  back  and 
think  no  more  about  it." 

"  Take  what  back,  pray  ?  " 

"  All  that  I  was  chattering  about.  It  was  only 
talk.  I  do  not  really  care.  I  would  not  tease 
you  for  the  world." 

"  Tease  me  I  Who  has  been  teasing  me  ?  " 
resounded  his  cheery  voice. 

"  Why,  I  thought  I  had  ; "  quite  discomfited 
by  his  breezy  manner. 

"  Not  you  !  You  tantalize  me  horribly,  some 
times,  but  tease  me,  never  !  " 

"  I  was  afraid  that  —  I  thought  perhaps  —  I 
did  not  know  but  that  you  might  fear  I  was  dis 
contented  and  wanted  to  meddle  with  what  is 
dear  to  you." 

"  Not  a  bit  of  it,  little  sweet-heart.  /  want 
mightily  to  meddle  with  what  is  dear  to  me,  but 
I  don't  dare  to  !  You  are  mistress  here.  Every 
thing  that  belongs  to  me,  or  everything  that  did 
belong  to  me  when  I  was  an  independent  gen 
tleman,  is  in  your  hands.  My  subjugation  is 
complete.  I  only  and  humbly  beg  leave  to  make 
a  mental  reservation  of  this  room." 

"  An  Indian  Reservation  is  what  you  want  to 


A    SENTIMENTAL  SKETCH.  221 

make  of  it,"  rejoined  Katherine,  greatly  relieved. 
"  Of  course  I  would  like  to  do  —  what  I  said. 
It  is  nice  to  do,  and  it  would  make  everything 
nicer.  But  —  I  want  to  please  you  too." 

"  The  way  to  please  me,  Kate,  is  to  do  what 
ever  you  like." 

"  But  I  mean  that  I  want  to  give  you  pleasure. 
You  must  not  make  me  wholly  selfish.  I  want 
to  make  it  pleasant  to  you.  That  is  stupid,  for 
of  course  it  was  always  pleasant  ;  but  I  should 
like  to  make  it  more  home-like  and  happy  to 
you.  That  is  selfish  too,  for  that  would  make 
me  happiest.  I  wish  I  could  ever  say  what  I 
mean.  Do  you  understand  ?  " 

"  With  all  my  heart.  It  is  like  you.  And 
nothing  can  make  the  house  seem  so  happy  and 
homelike  as  to  find  you  in  it,  and  over  it,  and 
about  it,  doing  what  you  will  with  your  own." 

"  You  know  once  you  said  I  was  not  pretty," 
said  Kate,  rather  at  right  angles  with  the  tide  of 
talk,  as  her  manner  was. 

"  Never !  "  said  Mr.  Glynn,  firmly. 

"  Or  words  to  that  effect." 

"  Never." 

"  At  least  you  said  you  did  not  know  if  I  was 
pretty  ;  and  of  course,  after  all  these  years,  not 
to  know  it  is  to  know  that  it  is  not." 

"Non  constat!" 

"  Now,  I  am  going  to  return  good  for  evil. 
Not  that  you  are  handsome,  exactly —  " 


222  FIRST  LOVE  IS  BEST. 

"  But  interesting  !  " 

"  Perhaps  I  should  not  quite  characterize  you 
as  an  interesting  man,  but  as  a  man  with  inter 
esting  points  in  you  —  " 

"  What  an  abominably  discriminating  creature 
to  have  about  1  And  as  to  looks,  then,  what  were 
you  going  to  say  ?  " 

"  Why,  that  you  have  a  sort  of  rich  face,  after 
all ;  as  if  there  had  been  plenty  material  to  make 
it  of.  Don't  you  know  some  people  have  a 
tightly  drawn,  pinched  look,  as  if  it  was  a  close 
fit  with  them  ?" 

"Good  heavens!  Katy,  just  wait  till  I  can  — 
Where  are  all  the  looking-glasses  ?  " 

"  You  need  not  look  in  the  glass,  for  you  won't 
find  what  is  best  there.  Are  you  doing  me  the 
honor  to  listen  ?  " 

"  To  be  sure  —  and  will  keep  at  it  as  long  as 
the  listener  hears  such  good  of  himself." 

"  He  will  hear  better.  He  will  hear  that  you 
always  ring  not  only  true,  which  I  should  expect, 
but  —  understanding  —  which  is  not  so  indispen 
sable.  It  is  a  pity  sometimes  to  get  at  the  north 
east  side  of  people  and  find  it  so  different  from 
the  southerly  and  sunny  exposure.  But  you,  Mr. 
Richard  Glynn,  on  whichever  side  one  approaches 
you,  you  are  always  southerly  and  sunny.  That 
is  where  you  get  your  face  !  " 

"  I  declare,  Katy,  if  you  were  not  talking  at  a 
face  which  has  forgotten  to  blush  for  these  dozen 


A   SENTIMENTAL  SKETCH.  223 

years,  you  would  fancy  all  the  world  was  turning 
red.  My  soul  is  blushing  furiously." 

"  O,  you  need  not  try  to  laugh  me  down.  All 
the  time  I  have  been  here  you  have  been  nice  to 
me.  You  have  not  been  cross  once,  nor  snubbed 
me  —  " 

"  A  remarkable  case  of  self-denial." 

"  O,  I  know.  I  have  been  sick  and  stupid 
and  dull,  but  I  have  not  been  so  dull  as  not  to 
know  that  I  have  not  been  a  nice  person  to  have 
about.  Yet,  all  dead  as  I  have  been,  I  have  lived 
just  as  keenly,  and  seen  just  as  clearly  as  if  I 
had  been  alive.  If  you  had  trespassed  I  should 
have  been  just  as  severe  as  if  I  had  been  perfec 
tion  myself.  But  you  have  never  once  angered 
me,  or  displeased  me,  or  disappointed  me  —  only 
that  you  have  been  so  much  better  than  I  could 
have  dreamed." 

"  Why,  Katy,  I  did  not  know  you  had  so  low 
an  opinion  of  me." 

"  I  did  not  have  —  I  only  never  thought  much 
about  it.  Yet  somehow  I  find  that  whenever  I 
accost  you,  you  never  fail  me.  And  that  is  quite 
remarkable,  I  think.  It  is  so  different  from  — 
O  !  "  and  Kate  brought  herself  up  short  with  a 
dismayed  moan. 

Mr.  Glynn  mentally  finished  out  her  remark 
to  his  liking,  but  gave  no  sign. 

"  Is  it  not  just  possible,  Katy,  that  you  bring 


224  FIRST  LOVE  IS  J3EST. 

a  little  of  the  atmosphere  you  find?  You  are 
not  exactly  a  souring  ingredient  yourself." 

"  I  will  not  have  you  taking  up  my  line  of 
remark,"  said  Kate,  loftily.  "Be  original." 

"But  being  stigmatized  in  this  categorico- 
biographical  way,  I  must  turn  the  tables  on  you, 
or  perish  in  the  attempt.  What  do  women  do 
under  a  course  of  flattery?  " 

"  Flourish  like  a  green  bay-tree.  It  is  our  na 
tive  air  —  with  variations."  '  He  began  to  com 
pliment,  and  she  began  to  grin.'  "  But  I  want 
you  to  understand  that  I  have  given  you  a  piece 
of  my  mind  !" 

"  And  I  want  you  to  understand  that  I  shall 
put  in  a  claim  for  a  great  deal  more  —  for  all  the 
remaining  pieces,  in  fact  ; "  but  Kate  skipped 
away  far  more  light-hearted  than  she  entered. 


AND  yet  it  had  been  a  shock  to  her  to  find 
herself  actually  instituting  a  comparison  be 
tween  Mr.  Glynn  and  Walter  Laballe,  and  to 
the  latter's  disadvantage.  And  then  it  almost 
gave  her  another  shock  to  apprehend  vaguely 
that  the  thought  of  Walter  had  somehow  grown 
indistinct  of  late.  Good  heavens  !  was  he  fading 
out  of  her  mind  ?  Good  heavens  !  then,  was  her 
mind  fading  out  ?  To  be  sure,  she  was  married  to 
another  man,  but  this  other  man  had,  in  a  way, 
given  her  leave  to  think  of  him.  She  had  cer 
tainly  not  the  smallest  intention  of  being  false 
to  her  husband,  but  she  had  as  certainly  in 
tended  to  be  true  to  herself,  to  Walter,  to  her 
idea  of  love.  She  had  meant  to  be  a  living  mon 
ument  to  constancy.  She  would  prove  that  love 
was  immortal ;  that  it  could  live  with  no  delight 
to  feed  on.  All  her  life  long  she  meant  to  be 
unfalteringly  faithful  at  this  sacred  shrine.  Poor 
Walter  !  One  constant  corner  in  her  heart  was 
little  to  give  to  him  to  whom  she  had  once  given 
15  225 


226  FIRST  LOVE  IS  BEST. 

so  much,  to  whom  she  had  looked  to  give  all. 
And  yet  it  was  true  that  poor  Walter  had  disap 
pointed  her  —  kept  disappointing  her;  that  she 
had  always,  in  some  sense,  care  of  him,  respon 
sibility  for  him,  anxiety  about  him  —  never  rest 
in  him ;  plenty  of  pleasure  and  pride,  but  never 
peace.  Mr.  Glynn  was  a  quiet  and  sober-going 
man,  —  though,  after  all,  more  lively  than  she 
would  have  supposed.  She  had  fancied  him  not 
caring  much  about  anything  that  she  cared  for, 
yet  he  did  have  likings  and  dislikings,  opinions 
and  ways  of  his  own,  which  she  had  come  to 
respect,  and  to  be  interested  in  finding  out.  She 
had  only  thought  of  him  as  a  member  of  the 
human  race,  and  he  had  turned  out  to  be  a  dis 
tinct  personality.  He  was  not  so  brilliant  as 
Walter.  He  was  not  anything  like  a  society 
man.  The  stage  on  which  Walter  shone  he 
shunned.  Kate  smiled  to  herself  to  think  of  the 
incongruity  of  Mr.  Glynn  figuring  in  any  of  the 
youthful  caprices  of  play  and  picnic,  but  she 
could  not  hide  from  herself  that  she  was  gaining 
a  confidence  in  him,  a  respect  for  him  that  Wal 
ter  had  never  been  able  to  inspire.  She  was  ac 
quiring  a  habit  of  mentally  referring  all  things 
to  him.  He  was  coming  gradually  to  be  her 
judge,  her  standard,  her  oracle. 

Not  arrogantly.  No  man  could  assume  less ; 
but  he  was  helpful.  His  opinion,  his  judgment, 
was  given  with  a  warmth  of  interest  that  glad- 


A  SENTIMENTAL  SKETCH.  227 

dened  and  encouraged  her  in  whatever  quest 
she  engaged  it.  And  as  she  gradually  entered 
more  deeply  into  the  circle  of  his  life,  she  saw 
and  was  impressed  and  influenced  by  the  sight 
that  he  was  held  in  high  esteem  of  men.  The 
sagacity,  the  gravity,  the  even  balance  of  facul 
ties  and  steady  poise  of  mind  to  which  she  had 
recourse  at  will,  and  for  any  lightly  occurring 
incident  and  slight  emergency,  were  sought  also 
as  she  saw  in  matters  when  fate  and  fortune 
were  at  stake.  And  sometimes  Kate  resolved 
that  she  was  too  trivial,  and  that  she  should 
forfeit  his  good  opinion  if  she  did  not  cease  to 
bring  upon  him  the  details  that  at  any  time  per 
plexed  or  perhaps  only  interested  her.  Yet  all 
such  resolutions  melted  away  before  his  friendly 
face,  and  however  sagacious  and  self-contained 
she  had  meant  to  be,  she  invariably  found  her 
self  talking  out  everything  that  was  in  her  mind 
and  in  her  life,  lured  on  by  she  knew  not  what  of 
playful  and  sympathetic  interest  that  was  in  no 
respect  prying  or  imperious,  but  a  sort  of  caress 
ing  and  constraining  solicitude  —  something  that 
asked  while  it  gave. 

And  while  Kate  worked  and  waited,  and  won 
dered  whereunto  her  life  should  grow,  and  mar 
velled  to  find  so  tranquil  what  she  had  feared  to 
find  so  troubled,  and  was  grateful  to  her  deepest 
heart  that  the  white  stole  of  peace  should  be 
folded  about  her  who  would  have  snatched  the 


228  FIRST  LOVE  IS  BEST. 

glittering  garments  of  happiness  —  lo  !  the  sum 
mer  had  come  round  again,  and  all  the  windows 
of  her  house  and  of  her  heart  she  flung  open  to 
sunshine  and  the  birds.  Her  own  home  had 
prospered.  Her  deft  swift  hands  had  dispelled 
what  of  gloom  the  years  had  gathered  in  it,  and 
her  quick  wit,  her  simple  and  delicate  taste,  her 
bright  and  loving  spirit,  had  disposed  its  wasting 
resources  in  the  interests  of  good  cheer,  and  over 
its  costly  and  cumbersome  magnificence  had  dif 
fused  the  airiness,  the  grace,  the  charm  of  a 
sweet  feminine  personality.  Kate  enjoyed  it 
herself  as  she  enjoyed  all  pretty  and  pleasing 
things.  In  a  quiet  way,  too,  she  enjoyed  pre 
siding  over  its  hospitalities.  She  welcomed  her 
neighbors  out  of  her  own  loving  heart,  but  she 
liked  also  to  have  Mr.  Glynn  bring  his  friends 
from  the  city,  and  to  see  their  pleasant  and 
plain-spoken  surprise  at  the  changes  wrought. 
She  liked  to  see  them  come  in  all  stately,  on 
their  best  behavior,  feeling  that  a  house  with  a 
wife  in  it  was  not  theirs  as  the  bachelor  house 
had  been  ;  and  she  particularly  liked  to  thaw 
them  out  with  gracious  friendliness  and  gentle 
freedom  till  they  "  owned  up  "  merrily,  and 
loudly  proclaimed  themselves  unfairly  but  com 
pletely  conquered,  and  declared  that  a  house 
with  a  wife  in  it  was  a  thousand  times  better 
than  a  bachelor's  den.  She  enjoyed  also  order 
ing  Mr.  Glynn  to  enjoy  it,  which  he  did  with 


A   SENTIMENTAL  SKETCH.  229 

prompt  and  profound  obedience,  and  needed  no 
order  from  Kate  to  admire  the  ways  of  Provi 
dence  in  bestowing  upon  a  woman  the  mysteri 
ous,  the  incomprehensible  gift  of  creating  the 
domestic  world,  all  blossoming  and  beautiful, 
out  of  those  same  materials  which  in  masculine 
hands  had  but  stretched  into  a  wide  waste  of 
cold  existence.  And  in  all  this  rose-blooming 
wilderness  of  his  was  nothing  so  sweet  and  en 
trancing  to  him  as  she,  under  whose  breath  it 
sprang  to  blossoming.  Deeper  and  dearer  grew 
she  daily  into  his  life,  half  maddening  him  some 
times  with  the  mockery  of  a  possession  who  did 
not  possess.  For  what  was  his  opportunity 
worth  if  it  availed  him  nothing  ?  In  some 
sense  it  availed  against  him,  for  he  saw  clearly 
that  what  might  have  been  manly  wooing  would 
be  most  unmanly,  since  Kate  had  no  resort  from 
himself.  What  pleasure  to  command  her  duty 
if  he  could  not  command  her  love  ?  He  knew 
well  that  he  could  break  her  heart,  but  he  could 
not  compel  it.  So,  never  for  an  instant  repent 
ing  a  single  step,  feeling  that  these  disturbed  and 
tumultuous  months  were  sweeter  than  all  the 
tranquil  years  that  had  preceded  them,  he  grew 
ever  more  discomposed  and  uncertain,  distraught 
with  the  storm  and  stress  of  a  love  that  was  baf 
fled  of  its  natural  outflow,  whose  tide  was  ever 
turning  on  itself.  And  sometimes  the  very 
depth  and  intensity  of  his  love  made  him  cow- 


230  FIRST  LOVE  IS  BEST. 

ardly,  and  he  despaired  of  ever  wearing  this 
flower  that  he  had  won  —  drooping  and  forlorn 
enough  indeed  when  he  won  it,  but  lifting  itself 
into  fairest  freshness  and  fragrance  under  his 
constant  and  loving  tendance. 

And  so  he   could  only  wait. 

Kate's  orphan  nursery  flourished  greatly.  Four 
little  waifs,  gathered  in  from  the  wild  wide  sea 
of  sorrow  and  poverty  and  despair,  were  already 
mothered  there,  and  promised  fairly  not  to  die 
under  Martha's  fond  and  sagacious  watch.  And 
Kate  grew  learned  in  baby  ways,  and  found  great 
pleasure  in  the  snapping  eyes  and  outstretched 
arms  and  leaping  little  figures  that  greeted  her 
approach,  and  had  many  grave  consultations 
with  Tishy  about  accounts  ;  for  Tishy  deigned 
to  consult  her  regarding  expenses,  though  dis 
playing  only  sovereignest  contempt  for  all  sug 
gestions  as  to  the  treatment  of  the  younglings. 
Thus  the  world  prospered  greatly  with  Kath- 
erine. 

But  when  the  first  picnic  of  the  season  loomed 
above  the  horizon,  Kate  said  instantly  and  in 
cisively  No,  and  then  feared  she  had  spoken  too 
positively. 

"  Do  you  want  to  go  ?  "  she  turned  to  Mr. 
Glynn. 

"Want  to  go?  My  dear  Kate,  it  was  peine 
forte  et  dure  when  you  were  decoy-duck.  What 


A  SENTIMENTAL  SKETCH.  231 

use  now,  when  the  game  is  decoyed  and  done 
for  ?  " 

"  It  will  be  tiresome  —  won't  it  ?  " 

"  I  can  tell  you  exactly  what  it  will  be  —  a 
ponderous  attempt  at  pleasure.  There  will  be 
some  very  pretty  boys  and  girls  in  the  highest 
spirits,  which  will  be  likely  to  reveal  that  they 
have  not  the  highest  breeding — joking  generally 
shows  the  threadbare  places  of  the  mind ;  there 
will  be  several  people  who  would  like  to  enjoy 
the  woods  and  water,  but  who  cannot  because 
they  must  talk  to  people  who  don't ;  and  when 
they  are  all  reduced  to  the  deepest  melancholy, 
the  eating  will  effect  a  momentary  diversion, 
overshadowed,  however,  by  the  speaking  which 
will  speedily  supplant  it,  wherein  one  forlorn 
automaton  will  try  to  pump  all  the  others,  who 
will  say,  each  in  his  turn,  that  he  did  not  expect 
to  be  called  on,  but  will  just  say,  &c.,  &c. ;  and 
when  human  endurance  can  no  more,  we  shall 
come  home  with  that  elastic  cheerfulness  which 
only  release  from  merry-making  can  produce." 

"  That  may  be  your  picnic,"  laughed  Kate, 
"  but  it  is  not  mine.  I  think  we  must  go." 

"  Young  boy,  we  must." 

For  Kate  had  suddenly  and  rapidly  recognized 
a  reluctance  to  resume  her  old  associations,  and 
to  that  she  was  resolved  not  to  submit.  Her 
future  should  in  no  respect  be  slave  to  her  past. 
She  would  cherish  her  love,  but  it  should  not 


232  FIRST  LOVE  IS  BEST. 

rule  her.  If  Mr.  Glynn  read  her  purpose,  he 
only  rejoiced  in  it.  But  neither  he  nor  she  was 
prepared  to  see  Walter  Laballe  walk  upon  the 
scene,  jaunty  and  festive  as  of  old.  They  had 
not  known  he  was  in  town.  It  was  his  wraith* 
not  himself,  that  Kate  had  feared,  and  resolved 
to  subdue. 

She  saw  him  before  she  had  alighted  from  the 
wagon,  while  chatting  for  a  moment  as  to  the 
best  place  to  leave  the  horse,  and  Mr.  Glynn 
saw  him  almost  at  the  same  moment.  Some 
sudden  impulse  laid  his  hand  on  Kate's  —  not 
with  a  clasp,  but  a  grasp  —  less  a  grasp  than  a 
grip.  It  was  not  endearment  or  succor,  but  a 
certain  instinctive  and  imperious  assertion  of 
ownership,  a  swift  and  forceful  dominance  that 
would  brook  no  intermeddling.  It  was  but  for 
an  instant,  and  Kate  looked  into  his  eyes  with 
clear,  level  gaze,  pale  and  proud. 

"  Do  you  wish  to  stay  ?  "  he  asked. 

"  I  will  stay." 

"  Shall  I  stay  by  you  ?  " 

"  I  do  not  need  you." 

There  was  undaunted  strength  in  the  brave, 
bright  face,  in  the  prompt  confident  voice,  and 
the  chilled  flood  of  life  rushed  back  and  warmed 
his  heart  again.  This  careless  cavalier  had  once 
imperilled  more  than  life  for  him,  and  he  felt 
that  the  smiling  face  boded  him  no  good.  It 
was  no  vulgar  outbreak  that  he  feared,  but  a 


A  SENTIMENTAL  SKETCH.  233 

check  and  set-back  to  the  current  that  he  hoped 
was — but  with  such  invincible  slowness  —  bring 
ing  Kate  to  himself.  For  Walter  Laballe  as  a 
man  he  had  a  mere,  perhaps  an  unwarranted, 
contempt  —  the  contempt  of  a  direct,  deter 
mined,  and  successful  man  for  one  of  vague 
purposes  and  puerile  accomplishment.  It  was 
Kate's  unfortunate  entanglement  that  lent  to 
Walter  Laballe  not  only  importance  but  exist 
ence  in  Mr.  Glynn's  eyes,  and  it  added  a  sort  of 
fury  to  his  disappointment  that  he  should  be 
thwarted  by  one  who  seemed  to  him  so  insignifi 
cant.  His  aspiration  to  Kate  and  his  success  with 
Kate  had  invested  Mr.  Laballe  with  a  dignity 
which  Mr.  Glynn  would  never  have  conferred 
upon  his  own  claims  alone  ;  but,  now  that  aspi 
ration  and  success  had  been  alike  swept  away 
by  Kate's  marriage  —  now  that  the  unsuccessful 
suitor  had  nothing  to  gain,  while  the  successful 
suitor  felt  that  he  had  yet  everything  to  gain, 
what  was  he  here  for  ?  Why  should  he  come 
to  meddle  and  mar  where  he  certainly  could  do 
nothing  else  ?  It  was  an  unreasonable  griev 
ance,  for  of  course  a  poor  man  cannot  be  ban 
ished  from  his  old  haunts  because  he  has  failed 
of  his  wife.  He  could  not  know  that  his  rival's 
victory  was  so  hollow  a  victory  —  was  as  yet  no 
victory  at  all  in  regard  to  the  prize  which  he  had 
set  himself  to  win.  But,  reasonable  or  unreason 
able,  there  he  was,  curled  and  comely,  tall  and 


234  FIRST  LOVE  IS  BEST. 

impressive,  talking  to  one  and  another  with  the 
same  grace  as  of  old,  with  just  a  shade  more  of 
melancholy  perhaps  in  the  large,  languid  eyes 
that  took  so  kindly  to  melancholy,  even  in  his 
gayest  moods. 

Mr.  Glyrm  and  Kate  walked  leisurely  over  the 
grounds,  accosting  various  friends,  and  greeted 
Mr.  Laballe  as  they  entered  his  group. 

"  I  am  glad  to  see  you,"  said  Kate,  cordially. 
"  I  did  not  know  you  were  in  town." 

Mr.  Glynn  strolled  away,  and  as  they  talked 
Mr.  Laballe  gradually  led  Kate  from  the  group 
where  they  could  talk,  not  unobserved,  but  un 
heard. 

"  I  only  came  Monday  evening.  My  stay  is 
to  be  very  short,  but  I  shall  give  myself  the 
pleasure  of  calling,  with  your  permission.  I  sup 
pose  I  may  present  my  congratulations  now  ?  " 

"  Good  and  evil  have  befallen  me  since  we 
met  last,"  said  Kate,  seriously.  "  I  have  lost 
my  father." 

"  I  know  it.  I  should  have  written  you  at  the 
time,  but  I  was  in  great  trouble  myself.  I  was 
not  sure  that  I  had  the  right." 

"  I  was  as  sure  of  your  sympathy  as  if  you  had 
written  ;  but  in  such  an  hour  nothing  makes  any 
difference.  You  said  you  should  be  here  but  a 
little  while.  Where  do  you  mean  to  spend  your 
summer?  " 

"  Nowhere,"  he  said,  smiling. 


A   SENTIMENTAL  SKETCH.  235 

"  That  is  not  easily  accessible,"  rejoined  Kate. 

"  The  fact  is,  I  found  myself  rather  suddenly 
pulled  up  by  the  roots,  and  I  don't  take  kindly 
to  transplantation.  You  know  all  growths  do 
not  thrive  equally  in  all  soils." 

"  Have  you  left  town  ?  "  asked  Kate,  surprised. 

"  No,  not  permanently ;  but  I  seem  to  have  no 
hold  on  anything." 

"  I  hoped  you  would  have  a  strong  hold  on 
the  law  by  this  time.  You  know  I  always  had 
the  belief  that  there  was  nothing  you  could  not 
accomplish  if  you  tried." 

"  I  have  lost  one  great  incentive  to  trial." 

"  Do  you  mean  me  ? "  queried  Kate,  out  and 
out. 

"  What  else  should  I  mean  ?  "  he  said,  a  little 
startled  out  of  his  melancholy  by  her  directness. 

"  It  strikes  me,"  said  Kate,  with  slight  amuse 
ment,  "  that  I  never  was  very  successful  in  the 
character  of  incentive." 

"No,"  he  said,  stung  evidently  by  something 
disappointing  in  her  manner;  "but  you  suc 
ceeded  extremely  well  when  you  went  into  busi 
ness  on  your  own  account." 

It  was  very  coarse ;  but  he  was  very  angry. 

Still,  if  the  coarseness  had  not  been  there, 
anger  would  not  have  brought  it  out.  And  if 
he  were  not  aware  that  his  little  affectation  had 
laid  him  justly  open  to  ridicule,  he  would  not 
have  been  so  angry.  Kate  was  slow  to  compre- 


236  FIRST  LOVE  IS  BEST. 

hend.  She  had  a  vague  notion  of  what  he 
meant,  but  could  not  really  believe  her  own 
understanding,  and  stared  at  him  in  sincere  sur 
prise.  At  length  she  said  slowly,  — 

"  There  is  much  in  my  relations  with  you  that 
I  regret.  But  I  should  regret  most  of  all  to 
despise  you." 

"  O,  Kate,  don't  say  that !  "  he  exclaimed,  the 
real  man  in  him  coming  uppermost. 

"  No,  I  won't,"  said  Kate,  kindly ;  "  but  you 
must  not  make  me." 

"But  you  ought  to  be  fair  to  me,  Kate.  I 
must  remember,  I  suppose,  that  you  are  Mrs. 
Glynn." 

"  I  am  Mrs.  Glynn,  certainly ;  but  how  am  I 
unfair  to  you  ?  " 

"  Why,  certainly,  Kate,  —  Mrs.  Glynn,  —  you 
will  not  deny  that  I  thought  your  heart  was  all 
mine,  and  suddenly  you  left  me  in  the  lurch  for 
a  poor  devil,  —  which  I  admit  I  am,  —  and  mar 
ried  Glynn  hand  over  fist." 

Kate  was  breathless  with  astonishment.  The 
case  as  he  had  boldly  stated  it  certainly  bore  the 
outlines  of  truth,  though  false  in  its  Avhole  scope 
and  spirit.  That  it  could  ever  have  presented 
itself  thus  to  him  she  had  not  dreamed.  She 
was  too  loyal  to  love  ever  to  have  fashioned, 
even  in  her  thought,  such  an  infidelity.  After 
the  first  rush  of  surprise  she  believed  that  it 
never  had  presented  itself  thus  to  Mr.  Laballe. 


A   SENTIMENTAL  SKETCH.  237 

"  "Walter,"  she  said,  gravely,  "  answer  me  truly, 
out  of  your  best,  your  honorable  consciousness. 
Do  you  think  it  was  because  you  were  poor  and 
Mr.  Glynn  rich  that  I  left  you  and  married 
him  ?  " 

"N — no,  I  do  not,"  he  replied,  after  a  mo 
ment's  hesitation. 

"  Do  you  think  that  before  I  left  you,  or  at  the 
time  I  left  you,  I  had  any  thought  of  marrying 
him  ?  " 

"  I  cannot  think  so,  indeed." 

"  Do  you  think  there  was  the  faintest  germ  of 
a  grain  of  insincerity  in  my  regard  for  you  and 
my  interest  in  you?  " 

"  I'll  be  hanged  if  I  do,  Kate  ;  and  I  was  a 
beast  to  say  what  I  did.  But  I  have  lost  you, 
and  Glynn  has  got  you,  and  all  his  money  into 
the  bargain ;  and  I  am  not  very  happy  besides. 
Forgive  me,  can't  you,  Kate  ?  " 

"  Entirely.  And  now  we  understand  each 
other,  and  will  be  good  friends,  and  never  speak 
of  this  any  more.  There  can  be  no  more 
thought  or  talk  of  loss  or  gain,  you  know,  when 
one  is  married." 

"  But  I  really  meant  no  harm.  Only  I  am  so 
wretched,  and  you  looked  so  blooming,  and  I 
felt  very  tender  towards  you,  and  you  laughed 
at  me  ;  and  then  it  really  was  not  such  a  very 
long  time,  you  know." 

"  There  is  a  great  deal  that  you  cannot  un- 


238  FIRST  LOVE  IS  BEST. 

derstand.  But  then  it  is  now  not  at  all  neces 
sary  that  you  should  understand,  —  only  that  I 
wish  to  be  your  friend,  —  if  you  have  faith 
enough  in  me  to  make  my  friendship  seem  worth 
while.  Why  are  you  wretched  ?  I  want  you  to 
be  happy." 

"  Happiness  is  not  for  me,"  he  said,  in  his 
most  pathetic  tones.  "  Love  and  life  have  gone 
against  me." 

"  I  wish  that  I  could  help  you,  and  I  know 
that  Mr.  Glynn  will  gladly  do  anything  pos 
sible." 

"  You  had  better  not  bespeak  him  ;  "  with  a 
sudden  dropping  into  conversational  inflections. 
"  He  does  not  look  at  me  as  if  he  loved  me." 

"  He  does  not  love  you,"  said  Kate,  simply ; 
"  but  he  will  befriend  you  for  my  sake." 

"  Well  he  might.  lie  has  had  all  the  luck  in 
life,  while  I  have  gone  to  the  dogs  by  lightning 
express  every  time." 

Kate  sighed  inwardly.  It  was  the  old  song ; 
always  luck,  —  never  patience,  purpose,  will. 

"  Is  it  anything  in  particular  that  has  gone 
against  you,  or  only  that  you  do  not  get  on  as 
fast  as  you  wish  ?  " 

"  It  is  that  I  don't  get  on  at  all.  The  law  is 
a  hideous  bore.  The  very  smell  of  the  court 
room  is  intolerable  to  me.  And  then  I  am 
having  a  deuce  of  a  time  at  home." 

Some  one  came  up  to  bear  Kate  off,  and  she 


A   SENTIMENTAL  SKETCH.  239 

had  no  more  private  conversation  with  Mr.  La- 
balle.  Nor  indeed  did  she  seek  any.  She  went 
hither  and  thither.  She  was  often  with  him, 
and  there  was  a  good  deal  of  lively  talk;  but 
through  it  all  she  seemed  to  be  living  a  sort  of 
double  life.  She  was  friendly  and  facile  with 
old  and  young.  She  helped  amuse  the  children, 
and  she  helped  to  lay  the  tables,  and  she  talked 
with  the  old  ladies,  for  whom  she  had  a  special 
liking,  and  was  never  wanting  to  the  young  men 
and  maidens ;  but  all  the  while  her  own  musings 
seemed  to  go  on  uninterruptedly.  What  was 
this  change  that  had  come  upon  her  ?  Or  what 
had  come  to  Walter  Laballe?  She  strangely 
felt  a  return  of  her  old  disappointment,  but  in 
different  respects,  though  she  would  have  been 
at  a  loss  to  say  how  or  in  what.  She  looked  at 
him  from  time  to  time,  and  somehow  character, 
strength,  promise  seemed  to  have  faded  out  of 
his  face.  It  had  grown  too  smooth  and  round. 
The  dark  eyes  seemed  to  be  looking  not  to  see, 
but  to  divine  what  others  thought.  There  was 
in  them  no  repose,  no  self-confidence.  His  very 
paleness  seemed  to  be  a  pallor  of  the  flesh,  not  a 
signal  of  the  spirit.  Her  glance  fell  involunta 
rily  on  Mr.  Glynn,  who  was  sitting  near  a  group 
of  children,  listening  to  the  music.  What  a 
sombre  face  it  was !  Yes,  sombre  was  not  too 
strong  a  word  for  its  expression  at  that  moment. 
But  the  thought  sprang  into  Kate's  mind  that  it 


240  FIRST  LOVE  IS  BEST. 

was  a  face  into  which  she  had  never  looked  in 
vain.  And  while  her  eyes  yet  rested  on  it  with 
wistful  intentness,  he  turned  his  glance  suddenly 
upon  her.  And  after  one  fraction  of  a  second 
Kate  came  to  her  senses,  and  half  blushed  at  the 
consciousness  of  being  caught  in  the  very  act  of 
spying  upon  him,  and  smiled  a  little  defiant  nod 
at  him,  as  who  should  say  she  did  not  care  if 
she  was.  But  there  was  something  of  good-fel 
lowship  and  light-heartedness  in  the  slight  pan 
tomime  that  communicated  itself  to  him,  and  it 
seemed  as  if  a  cloud  lifted  from  his  brow  and 
the  sudden  sunshine  brightened  his  whole  being. 
He  tapped  with  his  ringers  the  seat  beside  him, 
and  answering  his  look,  Kate  arose  and  joined 
him. 

"  Kate,  why  don't  you  tell  me  I  am  a  brute  ?  " 
he  said,  lounging  rather  indifferent!}'  perhaps, 
but  thereby  disabusing  the  interview  of  any  look 
of  confidential  conversation. 

"  That  would  not  be  good  manners,"  said 
Kate,  gayly. 

"  Did  you  think  I  distrusted  you  ?  " 
"  Distrusted  me  !     When  ?  " 
"  In  the  wagon  when  I  clawed  at  you." 
"  O,  no.     I  think  too  well  of  you  for  that." 
"  Kate,  you  are  an  angel.     Do  you  suppose  it 
would  surprise  the  people  if  I  should  pounce 
upon  you  with  a  tremendous  hug  ?     I  could  find 
in  my  heart  to  do  it." 


A   SENTIMENTAL  SKETCH.  241 

"  I  think  old  Mrs.  Beardslee  over  there  would 
stare." 

"  Why  should  she  ?  You  are  my  wife,  you 
know." 

"  The  very  reason  why  it  might  strike  her  as 
strange." 

"  Katy,  I  think  I  felt  for  an  instant  like  a  wild 
beast  when  she  sees  the  hunter  coming  for  her 
cubs.  She  does  not  distrust  them,  you  know, 
but  her  first  impulse  is  to  take  tooth  and  claw  to 
them,  and  run." 

"  How  much  better  is  a  man  than  a  beast !  It 
would  have  been  foolish  to  run." 

"  Seeing  I  had  not  a  fool  to  run  with.  Katy, 
if  you  were  a  fool,  I  suppose  I  should  love  you 
just  the  same.  But  you  could  break  my  heart." 

"  In  that  case  it  would  be  such  a  foolish  heart 
it  might  just  as  well  be  broken  as  whole,"  said 
Kate  the  heartless. 

"  What  a  little  weak  thing  a  woman  is,"  he 
presently  began  to  soliloquize  in  an  undertone, 
looking  down  askance  at  her  from  his  brown, 
brawny  heights.  "  A  little  bit  of  soft  prettiness 
lying  in  her  lap  there  she  calls  her  hand.  I 
could  crush  it  with  the  mere  foreboding  of  a 
grasp.  And  to  think  that  all  a  man's  strength 
and  soul  and  life  and  death  lie  in  that  little  soft 
hand !  Katy,  I  think  I  could  not  live  if  it  were 
not  a  sweet  hand,  a  tender  hand,  a  divinely 
sweet  hand.  I  wish  that  boy  would  tumble  out 
16 


242  FIRST  LOVE  IS  BEST. 

of  the  swing,  to  make  old  Mrs.  Beardslee  look 
the  other  way  a  minute." 

"See  here  now,"  said  good  Doctor  Blount's 
rough,  gruff  voice  coming  up  from  behind ;  "  it 
is  too  countrified  by  half,  a  man  sitting  down  at 
a  picnic  and  spooning  his  own  wife.  I  never 
thought  that  of  you,  Dick  Glynn.  Clear  out ! 
I  want  to  spoon  her  myself." 

"  If  you  had  only  come  a  minute  sooner,"  said 
Kate,  "you  would  have  seen  what  you  never 
would  have  believed  without  seeing,  —  me, 
obeying  a  look,  and  coming  away  from  the  big 
chestnut  over  there  to  sit  meekly  beside  a  do 
mestic  autocrat.  Can  you  believe  I  am  that 
high-spirited  creature  you  once  knew  and 
loved  ?  " 

"  I  could  believe  anything,  seeing  you  such  a 
wreck,"  he  declared,  glowering  at  her  from  be 
neath  his  shaggy  eyebrows. 

"  Does  me  credit,  doctor  ?  "  asked  Mr.  Glynn. 
"  Looks  well,  does  she  not  ?  " 

"  Too  well,  by  half.  That  is  sensible,  Glynn. 
Take  yourself  off.  Nobody  wants  you  here. 
You  don't  want  a  molly-coddle  for  a  husband, 
Kate  ?  " 

"  Yes,  I  do.  Not  that  I  know  what  a  molly 
coddle  is;  but  1  am  confident  it  is  just  what  I 
want," 

"  I  warrant  it !  There  never  was  a  woman  yet 
that  had  a  grain  of  horse-sense.  Give  her  a 


A    SENTIMENTAL  SKETCH.  £43 

fuddiduddle  that  will  dance  around  her  on  tip 
toe,  and  fetch  and  carry,  and  she  thinks  he  is  a 
man,  and  calls  it  devotion,  and  for  such  a  pop 
injay  will  send  to  the  right-about  any  time  an 
honest,  manly  fellow  who  will  lay  his  life  in  the 
dust  for  her  silently,  but  does  not  know  how  to 
mouth  sentiment  or  make  eyes  at  her." 

"  The  dear  doctor !  He  is  painting  his  own 
portrait.  But  he  has  painted  out  the  mole. 
You  never  went  down  into  the  dust  to  me ; 
never !  You  were  fond,  honest,  and  manly,  and 
all  that,  — fond,  but  you  always  scolded  me." 

"  If  Glynn  weren't  scowling  straight  at  me,  I 
would  give  you  a  kiss  for  your  impudence,  you 
jade.  Look  at  that  flopdawdle  over  yonder 
bowling  the  silly  girls  down  with  his  big,  black 
eyes." 

"  That  ?  Why,  that  is  Mr.  Laballe  !  " 
"  Mr.  La  Fiddlestick  —  without  the  fiddle. 
There  is  nothing  of  him  but  his  looks.  And  yet 
without  a  thimbleful  of  sense  in  his  skull,  he 
has  it  all  his  own  way  with  a  lot  of  tittering 
women." 

"Doctor  Blount,  you  shall   not   speak  so  of 
Mr.  Laballe,"  said  Katherine,  with  rising  wrath. 
"  High-diddle-diddle  !     Who's  to  prevent  ?  " 
"  J  prevent.     I  order  you  to  be  civil." 
"  Ho  !  "  in  a  sort  of  subdued  howl,  and  turn 
ing  full  upon  her ;  "  I  did  think  the  wind  was 
setting  in  that  corner  once." 


244  FIRST  LOVE  IS  BEST. 

"  Well,  you  see  it  was  not,"  said  Kate,  crossly. 

"  No ;  but  if  it  had,  I  should  have  been  sorry 
I  did  not  strangle  you  once  upon  a  time  when  I 
had  the  chance." 

"Here  you  are,"  said  Kate,  "with  money  and 
fame  and  troops  of  friends,  yet  devoured  with 
envy  of  a  poor  young  man  because  he  happens 
to  have  a  little  beauty  to  recommend  him." 

"It  is  a  mighty  saucy  and  snappish  little 
beauty  that  is  recommending  him  at  this  mo 
ment." 

"  Now,  then,  Doctor  Blount,  as  you  have  got 
off  a  pun  and  a  compliment  in  the  same  breath,  — 
and  you  know,  though  punning  is  easy,  compli 
ments  come  hard  to  you,  —  suppose  you  rest  on 
your  oars,  and  be  good-natured,  and  call  it  even 
with  Mr.  Laballe." 

"Me  —  even  with  that  Jack -i'- the- box  !" 
laughed  Doctor  Blount. 

"What  do  you  mean  by  your  Jack-i'-the-box?" 
fired  up  Kate  again. 

"  Come,  come,  you  need  not  go  off  in  a  huff 
again,  Mistress  Glynn.  You  did  not  marry  him." 

"  I  dare  say  I  should  if  he  had  wanted  me  to," 
said  Kate,  careering  recklessly  along  the  single- 
rail  track  of  truth. 

"No,"  said  Doctor  Blount,  blandly,  "if  Avorst 
came  to  worst,  I  should  have  forbidden  the 
banns." 


A   SENTIMENTAL  SKETCH.  245 

"  I  suppose  my  father  would  not  have  been 
considered  authority  on  the  subject." 

"My  old  friend  Haviland  was  a  fool,  a  soft 
hearted  fool,  with  sensible  streaks  in  him,  as  I 
have  often  had  occasion  to  remind  him.  And 
one  of  the  pleasantest  things  I  look  forward  to 
is  sitting  with  him  on  some  heavenly  hillside 
and  hearing  him  confess  I  was  right." 

Katherine  smiled.  She  knew  too  well  the  old, 
close  friendship  between  her  father  and  Doctor 
Blount  to  dream  for  a  moment  that  his  sharpest 
nip  was  for  anything  but  "  true  heart  and  not 
for  harm." 

"  But  don't  you  see  you  are  abusing  me  in 
abusing  Mr.  Laballe  ?  You  slight  my  judgment 
because  you  saw  for  yourself  we  were  friends, 
and  we  are  friends  still." 

"Not  at  all,  my  dear,"  said  Doctor  Blount, 
seriously.  "A  girl  may  amuse  herself  with 
many  a  young  man  whom  she  would  demean 
herself  by  marrying." 

"But  you  reviled  the  poor  girls  yonder  for 
amusing  themselves." 

"  O,  well,"  said  the  doctor,  acknowledging 
with  a  shrug  that  he  was  caught,  "  I  suppose  an 
old  fellow  may  be  allowed  to  growl  with  an  old 
friend." 

Kate  looked  at  him  with  a  smile  that  would 
have  made  it  difficult  to  growl  at  her. 

"  You  see,  Kute,  I  have  been   fool  enough  to 


246  FIRST  LOVE  IS  BEST. 

care  so  much  for  a  silly  chit  like  you  that  I  was 
desirous  you  should  not  throw  yourself  away.  I 
always  had  a  weakness  for  your  father,  and  you 
were  a  catching  sort  of  girl  yourself;  and  I 
think,  my  dear,  it  was  uncommon  sensible  of 
you  to  give  the  go-by  to  the  like  of  that  moon 
ing  young  Laballe,  and  your  hand  to  my  old 
friend  Dick  Glynn,  as  sound-hearted  and  level 
headed  a  man  as  the  round  world  harbors." 

"  Thanks,"  said  Kate,  smiling.  "  I  certainly 
have  nothing  against  your  friend.  But  why  are 
you  so  bitter  against  Mr.  Laballe  ?  The  world 
is  wide  enough  for  both." 

"  Laballe  has  no  substance  in  him.  He  is  all 
show  and  no  go.  He  has  never  done  anything 
in  life  but  spend  his  mother's  money.  Look  at 
it,  Kate.  He  must  be  hard  on  to  thirty,  and  has 
never  boned  down  to  anything,  but  helped  his 
mother  through  twenty  thousand  dollars,  and 
leaves  her  to  be  handed  around  from  pillar  to 
post  in  the  family,  while  he  goes  gallivanting 
with  the  girls.  That's  a  pretty  kind  of  man  to 
tie  to  !  And  yet  some  girl  —  and  a  fine  girl  too, 
no  doubt  —  will  tie  herself  to  him  any  time,  and 
minister  to  his  selfishness  with  her  money,  or 
drag  down  after  him  into  a  shameful  poverty. 
Do  you  think  I  would  have  let  you  do  that,  Mrs. 
Glynn  ?  No,  ma'am ;  I  would  have  shut  you  up 
in  my  drug-shop  first,  and  brayed  you  in  a  mor 
tar  with  a  pestle." 


A  SENTIMENTAL  SKETCH.  £47 

"  Till  I  came  to  my  senses." 

"  Such  as  they  are." 

"  Thank  you." 

"  Or  would  have  been  before  you  could  have 
contemplated  such  a  lapse  from  common  sense." 

"  I  have  a  suspicion,  dear  doctor,  that  I  am 
hungry." 

"  And  I  suppose  I  may  find  and  bring  you  a 
piece  of  frosted  fruit-cake  or  lemon-pie.  I  don't 
know  but  that  I  might  find  something  more 
senseless  and  sickish,  but  I  don't  think  I  could. 
I'll  try,  if  you  say  so." 

"  No,  I  don't  dare  trust  myself  to  you.  You 
will  be  making  experiments  on  me,  —  out  of 
pure  love  to  science,  doubtless ;  but  I  am  indif 
ferent  to  science  and  devoted  to  frosted  cake. 
But  out  of  sheer  cowardice  I  will  compound  on 
cold  chicken.  Let  us  make  an  onset  together." 

It  was  the  same  old  song  of  Walter  Laballe 
that  had  been  sung  to  her  once  before  for  warn 
ing,  but  somehow  it  seemed  colder  and  crueler 
from  the  lips  of  the  living  than  it  had  from  those 
of  the  dead  —  more  cruel,  but,  alas !  more  con 
vincing. 


next  day  Mr.  Laballe  called.  Katherine 
J-  received  him  in  the  little  breakfast  parlor, 
where  she  happened  to  be  sitting.  It  was  cool 
and  shaded,  opening  through  one  great  window 
upon  a  piazza  overclimbed  with  honeysuckle  and 
roses,  overlooking  a  sloping  lawn  dark  now  with 
luxuriant  leafage.  In  Kate's  old  home  every 
thing  had  been  dainty  and  refined.  In  this  new 
home  all  was  costly  and  elegant  as  well.  No 
eyes  could  be  quicker  to  take  in  the  costliness 
and  elegance  than  Mr.  Laballe's,  no  mind  could 
be  more  deeply  impressed  by  it,  and  no  heart  could 
set  a  higher  value  on  it  than  his.  And  here  was 
Kate,  part  and  parcel,  owner  and  dispenser  of 
all  this  state.  She,  who  had  never  in  the  least 
cared  for  wealth,  had  come  into  possession,  while 
he,  to  whom  it  would  have  been  the  path  to  fame 
and  fortune,  almost  the  very  staff  of  life,  was 
hopelessly  enslaved  by  narrow  and  narrowing 

fates.     Such  bitter  thoughts  he  revolved  as  he 

»  ° 

sat  in  Kate's  morning  room.    To  Kate  herself,  all 

248 


A   SENTIMENTAL  SKETCH.  249 

modest  and  unpretending  as  she  was,  the  mild 
state  and  splendor  were  far  from  unbecoming. 
She  had  acquired,  perhaps,  just  a  little  more  dig 
nity  and  self-possession,  the  latter  of  which  at 
least  she  sorely  needed  ;  but  she  had  lost  noth 
ing  of  girlish  grace.  Too  simple  and  sterling  to 
be  awed  by  or  indifferent  to  position,  she  wore 
her  matronly  honors  with  gracious  and  winning 
meekness.  Now,  as  she  sat  there,  all  white  and 
fair  and  pure  and  strong,  embowered  in  the  warm 
summer  gloom,  "  green-dense  and  dim-delicious," 
breathed  upon  by  the  morning's  fragrance,  sung 
to  by  birds  and  lulled  by  soft  summer  sounds 
droning  through  the  wide-flung  lattice,  she  was 
the  same  Katy  that  so  little  while  ago  had  flushed 
at  his  footfall,  had  listened  to  his  fluent  words 
with  all  her  soul  in  her  eyes,  had  flattered  him 
with  her  highest  hopes,  her  wildest  expectations. 
She  had  loved  him  then.  Whether  or  not  she 
loved  him  now,  who  could  tell  ?  She  certainly 
was  the  girl  in  all  the  world  who  would  not  have 
married  for  money ;  but  severed  from  him,  what 
might  she  not  have  done  to  gratify  and  satisfy  a 
dying  father  ?  He  himself,  Walter  Laballe,  had 
loved  her.  He  considered  that  he  had  loved  her 
profoundly  arid  truly,  "  as  a  man  is  able."  True, 
he  had  lightly  let  her  go ;  but  then  it  was  be 
cause  he  loved  her  too  honorably  and  unselfishly 
to  bring  her  down  to  poverty.  If  he  could  have 
shrined  her  in  such  a  home  as  this,  would  he 


250  FIRST  LOVE  IS  BEST. 

have  let  her  go  ?  What  ideal,  what  idyl,  could 
be  more  perfect  than  the  life  they  would  have 
led  had  but  fate  put  him  in  Glynu's  place  — 
Glynn,  who  was  simply  heavy  and  respectable, 
who  had  alertness  neither  of  love  nor  taste  !  To 
be  sure,  Glynn  had  not  wronged  him.  Glynn 
was  not  on  till  he  was  off.  Nor  would  the  house 
or  fortune  have  come  into  his  hands  if  they  had 
not  been  in  Glynn's.  Still  he  felt  —  what  in 
deed  it  was  always  easy  for  him  to  feel  —  a  vague 
sense  of  outrage.  He  grudged  Glynn  the  pos 
session  of  what  had  been  fairly  won,  and  not 
from  himself.  He  forgot,  indeed,  that  fortune 
and  love  had  once  been  in  his  own  hand  and  he 
had  lost  both  through  light  esteem.  He  could 
not  cherish  a  grudge  against  Kate.  He  had  in 
dulged  in  one  outburst  of  anger  against  her,  and 
she  had  instantly  reduced  him  to  dust  and  ashes. 
And  as  she  sat  before  him,  composed,  observant, 
forever  removed  from  him,  she  had  never  looked 
to  him  so  attractive  as  now.  Never,  he  felt  in 
his  inmost  heart,  never  in  her  free  girlhood,  when 
he  had  wooed  her  in  free  fashion,  and  won  her 
as  a  young  man  may,  though  he  had  loved  and 
valued  her,  never  had  she  seemed  to  him  so  alto 
gether  lovely,  so  immeasurably  desirable  as  now, 
when  she  was  wholly  beyond  his  reach.  The 
very  luxury  by  which  she  was  surrounded  height 
ened  her  charm  to  him,  who  had  been  content  to 
relinquish  her  because  he  could  not  command 


A   SENTIMENTAL  SKETCH.  251 

luxury.  If  sudden  fortune  had  come  to  him,  no 
memory  of  Kate  would  have  hindered  him  from 
amusing  himself.  If  with  his  own  fortunes  un 
changed  he  had  met  her  in  poverty,  he  would 
have  been  full  of  compunction  and  friendliness, 
but  would  have  congratulated  himself  that  he 
was  free  from  entangling  alliances.  Seeing  her 
in  sanctuary,  he  abandoned  himself  on  the  instant 
to  the  remembrance  of  his  love,  and  rage  against 
his  hard  fate. 

A  subtile  change  in  her  manner  towards  him 
did  not  escape  his  notice  ;  but  he  attributed  it  to 
anything  but  the  true  cause. 

"  Mrs.  Glynn,"  he  said,  abruptly  breaking  in 
upon  the  ordinary  topics  which  they  were  pleas 
antly  enough  discussing,  "  I  can  never  forgive 
myself  for  my  rudeness,  my  brutality  towards  you 
yesterday.  But  you  know  that  I  am  not  given 
to  brutality." 

"  I  know,"  said  Kate.  "  Let  it  all  pass.  Do 
not  bring  it  up  again.  Let  us  forget  all  that." 

"  I  cannot  forget.  I  only  want  you  to  do  me 
the  small  justice  of  measuring  the  bitterness  of 
my  disappointment  by  the  recklessness  of  my 
words.  If  the  bouleversement  had  been  less,  my 
speech  would  have  been  more  careful." 

"  I  was  sure  you  meant  no  harm.  I  am  sure 
you  can  never  cherish  any  harshness  towards 
me." 

"  Thanks,  Kate.    You  only  do  me  justice  there. 


252  FIRST  LOVE  IS  BEST. 

I  have  blamed  you  for  nothing  ;  but  indeed  I  have 
suffered." 

"It  would  not  have  been  creditable  to  either  of 
us  that  such  a  change  should  have  come  without 
suffering.  But  it  is  for  all  the  rest  of  your  life 
to  be  better  and  stronger  by  it." 

"  No,  that  is  not  my  way.  I  am  like  a  dial, 
good  for  nothing  except  when  the  sun  shines. 
Affliction  never  had  the  least  tendency  to  sanc 
tify  me.  I  can  but  admire  the  delicate  discern 
ment  of  Nemesis  in  hunting  about  to  find  the 
particular  kind  of  things  I  hate,  and  then  fur 
nishing  them  to  me  in  inexhaustible  profusion." 

"  But,  Mr.  Laballe,"  asked  Kate,  ever  ready 
to  enter  upon  missionary  work,  "  is  not  that 
partly  because  you  are  too  eager  in  seeking  the 
things  you  like  rather  than  the  things  you  ought 
to  do  ?  Does  not  the  trouble  come  because  you 
are  so  unwilling  to  learn  the  lesson  Nemesis 
wants  to  teach  ?  " 

"  I  dare  say.  You  cannot  accuse  me  of  any 
weakness  that  I  shall  not  freely  admit." 

"  O,  I  am  not  accusing  you  —  am  I?  I  cer 
tainly  did  not  mean  it." 

"  I  accuse  myself,  then.  I  have  failed  in  every 
relation  of  life.  And  I  have  failed  worst  of  all 
at  the  crisis  when  success  was  possible."  The 
great  eyes  grew  humid,  and  this  touched  Kate. 
She  forgot,  or  at  any  rate  overlooked  for  the  mo 
ment,  the  selfishness  which  lay  at  the  root  of  the 


A   SENTIMENTAL  SKETCH.  253 

failure.  She  relinquished  conversion,  and  gave 
herself  only  to  consolation. 

"You  have  surely  not  failed,"  she  said  eager- 
ly.  "  You  are  too  young  yet  to  speak  of  failure 
or  success.  Everything  is  still  before  you." 

"  Everything  is  before  me  —  true  ;  but  I  can 
not  touch  it ;  "  and  his  eyes  pointed  the  meaning 
of  his  words. 

"  Everything  that  makes  success,  and  most 
that  makes  happiness,  you  can  not  only  touch, 
but  grasp,"  said  Kate,  gravely. 

"  Once  it  was  possible  to  me." 

"  It  is  possible  still." 

"  No,  Kate ;  you  laughed  at  me  yesterday,  and 
justly  enough  ;  but  you  do  not  know,  I  did  not 
know,  what  strength  went  from  me  when  you 
left  me.  The  one  defect  of  my  life  is  —  redun 
dance.  I  can  do  too  many  things  tolerably.  I 
needed  a  power  to  clamp  me  to  one.  O  Kate  ! 
if  3rou  could  have  borne  with  me  a  little  longer! " 

"If  you  could  have  held  me  a  little  stronger ! " 
was  the  response  that  leaped  to  Kate's  lips  ;  but 
she  wisely  forbore,  and  only  said,  smiling,  "  We 
will  look  at  the  may-be  now,  and  not  at  the 
might-have-been." 

"  But  the  might-have-been  is  the  only  thing 
that  has  any  attraction  for  me.  Kate,  you  sit 
here  peaceful  and  prosperous,  and  you  forget  the 
love  that  once  made  your  life.  You  do  not  know 
what  it  is  to  be  beating  about  the  world,  barred 


254  FIRST  LOVE  fS  BEST. 

from  the  career  you  long  for,  bound  to  the  career 
you  hate,  and  the  one  pure  spirit  you  worshipped 
wrested  from  you  forever.  Kate,  I  feel  like  a 
fugitive  and  a  vagabond  upon  the  earth.  I  cling 
to  you  with  the  grasp  of  the  dying.  I  cannot 
loose  my  hold." 

"  I  wish  you  would  talk  with  Mr.  Glynu.  ] 
am  sure  he  would  help  you." 

"  The  devil  he  would  I  " 

There  was  some  excuse  for  the  man's  rough 
speech.  What  vague  evil  intent  was  in  his  heart, 
heaven  knows,  or  the  other  place  ;  probably  the 
man  himself  did  not.  He  certainly  had  not  come 
with  any  definite  design  of  winning  Kate's  heart 
back  again,  nor  even  of  destroying  her  peace  of 
mind,  or  her  husband's  happiness.  He  was  not 
so  bad  as  that.  But  finding  himself  there,  and 
finding  Kate  still  winsome,  and  feeling  under  no 
obligation  to  consider  Mr.  Glynn's  happiness  as 
in  his  keeping,  it  seemed  easy  and  natural  to  fall 
into  a  semi-love  talk  with  Kate.  She  was  very 
pleasant  to  him,  and  regret  and  melancholy  were 
very  pleasant  to  him,  and  her  sympathy  had  al 
ways  been  exceeding  pleasant  to  him.  He  had 
always  been  interested  in  talking  about  himself, 
and  Kate  had  never  been  tired  of  listening.  Now 
he  had  a  real  grievance,  a  palpable  and  touching 
sorrow,  and  he  never  inquired  whether  its  indul 
gence  might  involve  or  in  any  way  disturb  Kate, 
or  lead  to  or  reveal  any  dissatisfaction  in  her  life. 


A   SENTIMENTAL  SKETCH.  £55 

Whither  his  talk  was  tending  he  had  not  duly 
considered,  perhaps  ;  but  what  he  really  wanted 
to  make  out  was,  that  Kate  was  not  in  love  with 
her  husband,  and  was  in  love  with  himself,  or 
was  not  so  much  in  love  with  her  husband  as  not 
to  be  still  susceptible.  He  did  not  for  a  moment 
think  of  tempting  her  from  duty,  from  respecta 
bility  rather ;  but  it  would  have  been  exhilarating 
to  find  that  her  husband  had  not  been  able  to 
oust  her  lover  from  her  heart.  And  then  —  he 
was  just  the  kind  of  man  for  it  —  he  would  have 
established  himself  in  a  semi-questionable  posi 
tion  with  her,  —  a  sentimental  friend  with  all  the 
immunities  of  friendship  and  all  the  luxury  of 
love,  —  an  enjoyment  all  the  more  piquant  for 
the  flavor  of  doubt  and  danger.  It  could  not  be 
a  tranquil  or  a  secure,  or  a  happy  position  for 
Kate,  but  it  could  be  a  very  stimulating  and  very 
delightful  one  for  Walter  ;  far  better  suited  to 
his  poetic  temperament  and  aesthetic  culture  than 
a  humdrum  marriage  with  its  every-day  duties 
and  prosy  responsibilities.  In  short,  Walter  La- 
balle,  without  being  a  very  bad  man,  without 
formally  resolving  to  be  bad  in  the  least  degree, 
was  through  sheer  self-indulgence  starting  out  to 
be,  what  many  another  has  been  before  him,  just 
as  bad  a  man  as  the  woman  would  let  hirn  be. 
His  salvation  lay  in  the  simple  fact  that  the  wo 
man  would  not  let  him  be  bad  at  all.  She  had 
no  thought  of  rebuffing  him,  or  of  reminding  him 


256  FIRST  LOVE  IS  BEST. 

of  her  position.  It  had  never  occurred  to  her  as 
possible  that  he  should  put  himself  in  a  situation 
to  be  rebuffed.  Kate  was  married,  and  that  fact 
made  it  as  impossible  for  her  to  have  a  sentimen 
tal  talk  with  Walter  Laballe  as  if  she  had  been 
dead  —  at  least  the  kind  of  sentimental  talk 
which  he  was  constantly  trying  to  push  into. 
If  his  eyes  had  not  been  held,  he  would  have 
seen  all  along  that  Kate's  instinctive  integrity 
had  bereft  him  of  all  personal  power  over  her  — 
entirely  apart  from  the  fact  that  he  had  dimin 
ished  in  her  esteem.  But  his  eyes  were  held 
and  he  did  not  see  it,  or  only  saw  it  as  a  scruple 
of  propriet}7  that  was  to  be  swiftly  burned  away  ; 
and  it  was  with  unfeigned  chagrin  that  he  found 
his  heart-tragedy  lumped  in  with  his  debts  and 
disabilities,  and  coolly  turned  over  to  his  success 
ful  rival  —  and  by  the  very  woman  who  had  been 
and  was  to  be  chief  actress  in  the  great  drama ! 
A  slight  profaneness  might  perhaps  be  excused 
under  the  circumstances. 

Katherine  was  profoundly  unconscious  of  her 
lack  of  susceptibility.  She  was  entirely  unaware 
of  the  woful  failure  she  was  making.  She  was 
only  thinking  how  Walter  could  be  helped  out 
of  the  Slough  of  Despond  into  which  he  seemed 
to  be  sinking,  and  she  referred  him  to  Mr.  Gtynn 
from  force  of  habit.  The  quiet,  silent  surprise 
in  her  eyes  brought  Mr.  Laballe  to  his  manners 


A   SENTIMENTAL  SKETCH.  257 

again  —  his  manners  not  being  entirely  the  out 
growth  of  himself. 

"  Excuse  me  again,  Kate,  but  —  but  I  don't 
think  Mr.  Glynn  would  mend  matters  exactly." 

"  You  don't  know  Mr.  Glynn's  resources  per 
haps  so  well  as  I." 

"  It  is  not  possible  that  you  —  love  him  ?  " 

And  the  manifest  sincerity  of  the  question 
mitigated  it  a  little.  But  Kate  flushed  an  angry 
red  from  brow  to  chin. 

"  It  is  not  possible  that  you  could  ask  such  a 
question  —  of  his  wife." 

"  I  know  I  have  no  right  to  —  but  —  Kate  — 
I  was  so  near  you  once  that  —  I  think  I  might 
be  excused  some  things.  It  is  a  little  different 
from  —  " 

"  Were  you  ever  nearer  to  me  than  Mr.  Glynn 
is  now  ?  " 

"  Of  course  not,"  he  murmured,  utterly  cowed. 

"  How  I  feel  towards  my  husband,"  said  Kate, 
proudly,  "  is  a  matter  between  him  and  me. 
What  I  think  of  him  the  whole  world  is  wel 
come  to  —  that  he  is  a  man  for  any  woman  to 
thank  God  for,  and  to  try  her  whole  life  long  to 
be  worthy  of." 

Kate  was  too  much  in  earnest  to  mind  the  con 
struction  of  her  sentences,  but  she  made  herself 
clearly  understood,  which  is  about  the  best  thing, 
after  all,  that  sentences  can  do.  Mr.  Walter  La- 
balle,  at  any  rate,  fully  understood  that  he  must 
17 


258  FIRST  LOVE  IS  BEST. 

take  his  eyes  and  his  woes  and  his  wares  gener 
ally  to  some  other  market.  But  he  came  into 
line  handsomely  first. 

"  You  are  a  good  woman,  Kate,"  he  exclaimed, 
impulsively. 

"  Of  course  I  am  a  good  woman,"  said  Kate, 
relenting  after  her  little  flash  of  passion,  and 
beginning  to  scold  —  a  sure  sign  that  she  was 
placated.  "  What  did  you  think  I  was  ?  " 

"  Nothing  else,  of  course,"  he  stammered,  con 
fused  by  her  unshaded  directness.  Moreover, 
her  resentment  seemed  to  reveal  his  meanness 
to  himself.  "  Heaven  knows  I  think  nothing  of 
you  but  good,  and  I  want  nothing  of  you  but 
good." 

"  Then  say  nothing  but  good.  You  have  been 
talking  very  ill  indeed." 

"  I  suppose,  Kate,  I  was  wild  enough  to  think 
I  might  not  have  lost  everything.  I  must  re 
member  that  we  are  wholly  two  persons,  and  the 
past  is  blotted  out." 

"  Of  course  there  can  be  nothing  else,"  said 
Kate,  wholesomely.  "  Why,  I  am  married.  That 
puts  a  stop  to  everything —  in  particular." 

Little  can  be  said  for  Kate's  language  or 
her  attitude,  which  were  commonplace  enough. 
But  at  least  she  was  honest  and  intolerant  of 
sophistry. 

"  It  does  not  put  out  the  eyes  in  a  man's  head. 
If  it  did,  I  should  not  have  made  a  fool  of  my- 


A   SENTIMENTAL  SKETCH.  259 

self.  Kate,  I  am  going  away.  Don't  think  any 
worse  of  me  than  I  am." 

"  I  won't  think  ill  of  you  at  all  if  you  will  not 
keep  saying  things  that  make  me.  Where  are 
you  going  ?  " 

"  I  don't  know.  Anywhere,  anywhere  out  of 
this  world." 

"  But  not  for  a  great  while  yet." 

"  I  suppose  not.  I  shall  shuffle  along  some 
where,  like  the  outcast  I  am.  People  don't  die 
because  they  don't  want  to  live.  Good-bye, 
Kate.  Forget  that  you  have  seen  me.  That  is 
the  best  service  you  can  do  me." 

"  No,"  said  Kate,  giving  him  her  hand  in 
most  kindly  token  ;  "I  shall  remember  that  I 
have  seen  you,  and  that  you  were  a  little  dis 
couraged  and  desponding,  and  therefore  a  little 
foolish,  but  meaning  nothing  but  to  behave  your 
self.  And  now," — like  an  experienced  matron 
bidding  her  eldest  son  fare  forth  into  life,  —  "now, 
Walter,  don't  give  way  to  discouragement,  but 
be  brave  and  earnest  and  make  a  good  fight,  and 
I  know  you  have  every  kind  of  success  lying  in 
store  for  you  yet.  O,  if  you  only  would,  you 
could!"  This  last  was  rather  an  exclamation  to 
herself  than  an  adjuration  to  him. 

So  they  parted  in  friendly  guise,  neither  of 
them  the  happier,  but  both  the  wiser  for  the 
meeting. 

And  Mr.  Glynn,  quietly  returning  home,  saw 


260 


FIRST  LOVE  IS  BEST. 


far  off  through  a  vista  of  open  doors  the  two  fig 
ures  standing  in  the  act  of  farewell,  intent  eyes 
meeting,  hand  lingering  in  hand,  the  slow,  sad 
separation  ;  and  turned  quickly  aside  to  pursue 
in  solitude  meditations  that  gave  him  no  pleasure 
and  boded  him  no  peace. 


XVI. 

17"  ATHERINE  was  neither  voluble  nor  minute 
JLV  in  giving  an  account  of  this  visit  to  her  hus 
band.  It  was  a  theme  she  did  not  gladly  dwell 
on,  yet  in  thought  she  dwelt  on  it  constantly. 
She  was  inwardly  shamed  —  feeling  that  some 
how,  unwittingly,  she  must  have  betrayed  the 
trust  which  her  husband  had — most  simply  and 
nobly  she  felt — confided  in  her,  or  Walter  could 
never  have  spoken  to  her  as  he  did.  And  yet, 
perversely  enough,  the  more  discontented  she 
grew  with  him  inwardly,  the  more  she  felt  as  if 
she  must  defend  him  outwardly.  Her  unusual 
reticence  and  silence  did  not  escape  Mr.  Glynn's 
notice,  and  under  the  circumstances  did  not  add 
to  his  content. 

"  I  do  not  believe,"  she  said,  rather  abrupt 
ly,  "  that  Walter  Laballe  ever  squandered  his 
mother's  fortune.  He  was  extremely  fond  of 
his  mother." 

"  Who  has  brought  so  hard  a  charge  against 
him  ?  "  asked  Mr.  Glynn. 

261 


262  FIRST  LOVE  IS  BEST. 

"  There  have  always  been  echoes  flying  about. 
But  I  don't  imagine  any  one  really  knows  any 
thing,  only  that  whereas  he  was  rich  he  is  now 
poor.  But  he  told  me  that  himself,  in  the  first 
place.  He  never  made  any  secret  of  it.  It  is 
not  a  crime  to  be  unsuccessful." 

"  Certainly  not;  nor  to  be  successful,  either;" 
with  a  smile  that  was  a  request. 

"  But  everything  Dr.  Blount  has  touched,  or — 
or  you  —  has  gone  right,  so  you  are  hard-hearted 
towards  those  who  fail." 

"I?  " 

"  Well,  not  you  perhaps,  but  Dr.  Blount ; " 
and  she  repeated,  with  some  softening,  what 
Dr.  Blount  had  said  of  Mr.  Laballe  ;  adding, 
"  Now  do  you  suppose  there  is  a  word  of  solid 
truth  in  this?" 

"  Dr.  Blount  is  not  a  man  to  speak  unadvisedly 
with  his  lips." 

"  He  would  not  make  up  a  wicked  story,  but 
he  is  not  infallible." 

"  Nor  am  I." 

"  O,  you  can  tell  me  what  you  think  !  "  cried 
Kate,  a  little  petulantly,  equanimity  of  temper 
not  being  one  of  her  chief  charms. 

"  I  have  understood  that  when  Mr.  Laballe 
came  of  age,  he  came  into  twenty  thousand  dol 
lars,  and  his  mother  inherited  the  same.  Both 
fortunes  are  gone,  but  it  is  hardly  fair  to  say  that 
he  squandered  them.  I  never  heard  that  he  gam- 


A  SENTIMENTAL  SKETCH.  263 

bled,  or  was  in  any  way  dissipated,  but  neither  he 
nor  she  seemed  to  have  the  slightest  idea  that 
twenty  thousand  dollars  could  ever  come  to  an 
end.  But  if  you  never  add  and  constantly  sub 
tract,  Katy,  it  inevitably  will  come  to  an  end,  in 
that  most  practical  of  all  races,  the  long  run. 
They  travelled  and  lived  at  a  rate  that  would 
not  have  been  extravagant  if  it  had  been  their 
income  and  not  their  principal,  which  was  twenty 
thousand  dollars.  The  consequence  was  that 
they  came  to  the  ground  with  a  thud." 

"  You  know  that  this  is  true  ?  " 

"  I  have  had  a  good  deal  to  do  with  their  busi 
ness  affairs." 

"  And  you  never  told  me." 

"  You  never  asked  me.  Besides,  Katy,  there 
are  many  matters  of  this  sort  that  I  should  never 
think  of  speaking  to  you  about." 

"  But  don't  you  see,  Mr.  Glynn,"  said  Kate, 
feeling  a  little  rebuked,  "  that  it  makes  —  that 
it  shows — that  it  implies  an  element  of  what  we 
call  —  meanness  or  —  weakness  ?  " 

"  It  does  not  imply  exactly  what  we  call  man 
liness.  Not  that  Laballe  is  a  bad  fellow,  either — 
if  he  only  had  a  guardian." 

"But  I  should  think  you  would  have  told 
me." 

"  I  have  told  you." 

"  But  before  this." 

"  When  ?  " 


264  FIRST  LOVE  IS  BEST. 

"Why  —  why — when  I  was  making  up  my 
mind?" 

Mr.  Glynn  smiled.  "I  don't  remember  that 
you  confided  to  me  when  that  time  was.  Be 
sides,  Madame  Kitty,  it  is  not  a  man's  way  to  go 
to  the  girl  he  wants  and  say,  'Pray  take  me. 
The  other  fellow  is  a  vagabond.'  Such  a  wooing 
would  hardly  recommend  itself  to  the  girl." 

"  I  think  Mr.  Laballe  is  in  some  special  per 
plexity  now." 

"  I  should  not  wonder.  His  uncle,  who  has  a 
considerable  family  of  his  own  and  no  more 
property  than  the  Laballes  had,  is  a  little  restive 
under  their  expenses,  and  is,  in  fact,  not  making 
it  quite  comfortable  for  him." 

Kate  found  that  her  mortification  and  chagrin 
were  not  to  be  removed  by  an  appeal  to  her  hus 
band.  She  experienced  for  Walter  Laballe  a 
whimsical  sort  of  pity,  with  an  admixture  of 
scorn  both  for  him  and  for  herself.  While  he 
had  been  present,  pity  had  rather  carried  it  over 
scorn;  but  when  he  was  gone,  scorn  rather  got 
the  upper  hand.  She  had  given  him  so  much 
commiseration  on  the  theory  that  he  had  been  a 
sort  of  big  Babe  in  the  Wood  hardly  dealt  with 
by  a  hard  old  uncle ;  a  genius,  struggling  up 
into  self-expression  against  adverse  circumstances 
—  even  at  his  worst  only  failing  in  final  endur 
ance,  and  that  partially  because  of  an  exquisitely 
refined  if  somewhat  languid  nature.  To  be  sure 


A  SENTIMENTAL  SKETCH.  265 

he  had  not  stated  the  case  in  so  many  words, 
but  certainly  from  no  one  else  had  she  or  could 
she  have  received  that  impression.  Then  he  had 
so  lived  as  to  seem  weak  in  the  eyes  of  men,  and 
Kate  could  have  as  easily  forgiven  wickedness. 
And  he  was  not  only  weak  in  the  original  lapse, 
but  there  was  the  unhandsomeness  of  letting 
others  be  unfairly  blamed.  This  was  the  man 
she  had  loved.  All  her  knightly  imaginings 
and  her  lofty  aspirations,  her  dreams  of  chivalry 
and  romance  —  this  is  where  they  had  led  and 
landed  her,  said  Kate,  in  fierce  spasms  of  self- 
disgust.  She  had  gone  in  and  out,  weaving  her 
fine  web  of  fancy,  holding  herself  too  high  for 
any  ordinary  lot.  Mr.  Glynn  had  been  common 
place  and  Dr.  Blount  rough,  and  one  and  another 
content  with  every-day  doings.  She  forsooth 
must  lift  her  head  above  the  clouds.  And  her 
hero  of  the  mighty  achievement  had  achieved  a 
vulgar  disaster,  and  her  commonplace  fellow- 
creatures  held  him  in  good-natured  contempt, 
and  waited  and  pitied  in  silence  while  she  had 
fancied  herself  dwelling  in  a  palace  of  dainty 
delights.  What  a  rare  and  valuable  thing  her 
love  must  be,  indeed !  What  a  delicate  and 
discriminating  creature  she,  with  so  subtile  an 
instinct  for  best  things  !  O,  Kate  did  not  spare 
herself !  Nothing  was  too  severe  and  sarcastic 
to  be  hurled  at  that  unlucky  girl,  always  known 
to  her  friends  for  a  shallow  and  hollow  pre- 


2G6  FIRST  LOVE  IS  BEST. 

tender,  but  now  self-caught  in  all  her  high- 
sounding  and  specious  charlatanry.  And  then 
Kate  relented  a  little  towards  herself,  not  being 
naturally  hard.  After  all,  she  had  not  the  chance 
to  know  the  man-side  of  the  man ;  and  was  it 
strange  that  she  should  have  been  misled  by  the 
woman-side,  which  seemed  so  fair.  But,  on  the 
other  hand,  what  made  it  seem  so  fair?  Cer 
tainly  it  had  not  seemed  fair  of  late,  even  before 
Dr.  Blount  wailed  his  doleful  screed.  She  had 
been  conscious  she  had  even  noted  the  indefina 
ble  change.  It  was  as  if  a  veil  had  fallen  from 
his  face.  What  had  been  interesting,  interested 
her  no  more.  What  had  been  impressive  and  to 
be  studied  was  common  and  to  be  let  go.  Kate 
did  not  yet  know  that  a  stronger  nature  had 
overpowered  the  weaker,  that  a  finer  character 
had  disenchanted  her  of  the  coarser,  that  a 
subtler  flavor  had  rendered  the  old  rank  and 
insipid.  With  an  earnestness  born  of  the  knowl 
edge  that  life-long  peace  and  life-long  grief  were 
in  the  question,  for  weeks  and  months  had  Kate 
watched  a  face  whose  lines  had  been  graven  by 
no  dilettante  soul.  Were  the  eyes  gray,  or  blue, 
or  brown?  Even  now,  Kate  could  hardly  tell. 
They  were  certainly  not  a  languid  black.  But 
as  Kate  thought  and  mused  she  was  aware  that 
behind  those  eyes  somewhere  dwelt  a  soul  that 
was  still  a  mystery  to  her.  She  had  neighbored 
it  for  many  a  year  and  had  never  suspected  its 


A  SENTIMENTAL  SKETCH.  267 

existence.  It  had  ministered  to  her  pleasure,  it 
had  waited  upon  her  whims ;  her  baby  fingers  had 
toyed  with  its  strength,  and  her  maiden  grace 
had  unconsciously  wrought  its  gentle  pleasance 
into  love,  and  its  love  into  immortal  longing  — 
herself  the  while  unmoved,  untouched,  unaware. 
But  there  came  a  day  when  the  slighted  soul 
affirmed  its  existence  and  asserted  its  power.  In 
the  rush  and  tumult  of  that  troubled  hour  had 
Kate  bent  her  discrowned  head,  owned  alle 
giance  and  sworn  fealty.  Again  and  again  out 
of  the  eyes  that  she  had  so  long  looked  at  and 
never  seen,  saw  she  now  the  strong  and  steadfast 
soul  peering  with  wistful,  watchful  gaze  into  her 
own.  From  that  scrutiny  she  had  not  shrunk,  not 
only  because  she  was  vestured  in  the  tranquillity 
of  a  sincere  and  simple  heart,  but  because  she 
knew  it  was  the  watch  of  love  vigilant  to  guard, 
not  of  severity  lurking  to  ensnare.  All  the  same 
she  had  never  passed  out  from  under  the  shadow 
of  its  sovereignty.  Through  all  her  hours  of 
gay  or  serious  talk,  through  all  her  days  of  care 
less  care,  of  tender  tyranny  and  playful  indul 
gence,  of  light-hearted  comradeship  and  the  vital 
solace  and  succor  of  faithful  friendship,  ever 
and  anon  would  Katherine  catch  glimpses  of  this 
waiting  and  silent  soul  —  no  pallid  and  pulseless 
devotee  at  love's  altar,  but  full  of  fire  as  of 
faith,  full  of  passion  as  of  patience,  in  its  very 


268  FIRST  LOVE  IS  BEST. 

restraint  commanding,  absolute  in  gentleness 
and  in  courage. 

And  how  had  she  responded  ?  What  had  she 
returned  for  all  this  high  worship  ?  Light  liking 
while  it  was  yet  unspoken  ;  blank,  brusque  re 
pulse  when  it  was  proffered  ;  and  since,  the  grat 
itude  due  for  service  rendered  ;  while  all  that 
she  had  of  love  and  life  to  give  she  had  laid  at 
the  feet  of  one  who  could  not  discern  its  value 
and  would  not  deserve  its  continuance.  Value  I 
value !  would  then  Kate's  just  wrath  against 
herself  cry  out.  What  value  could  attach  to 
such  a  love  ?  —  a  love  that  was  bat-eyed,  mole- 
eyed,  owl-eyed,  —  and  if  Kate's  natural  history 
could  have  supplied  her  with  any  other  blind 
beast  she  would  have  marshalled  him  into  line 
instantly  for  her  own  discomfiture  —  she  who 
had  loved  love,  had  adored  love  as  the  world's 
one  wealth,  had  dreamed  her  bright,  high  dreams 
of  no  such  mere  habit  of  love  as  just  stirred  the 
stagnation  of  dull  domestic  life,  but  of  a  grand, 
absorbing,  heroic  passion  that  should  realize  the 
ideals  of  poetry  and  recreate  the  Earth  with  all 
the  hues  of  Heaven ! 

Was  it  such  love  as  this  that  had  found  her 
out  and  that  she  had  calmly  and  curtly  rejected  ? 
Surely  never  rode  knight  to  maiden  so  simply 
bedight.  She  had,  of  course,  not  expected  her 
lover  to  come  plunging  along  the  fern-bordered, 
daisy-bedecked,  sweetbrier-smelling  road,  clad 


A   SENTIMENTAL  SKETCH.  269 

in  mail,  and  high-mounted  on  gold-caparisoned 
steed  —  as  they  dashed  down  the  old  ballads  and 
epics  —  not  exactly.  Still,  she  had  thought  he 
would  be  a  little  out  of  the  common  !  Certainly 
she  had  not  dreamed  that  he  had  made  oak-leaf 
wreaths  and  dandelion  necklaces  for  her  baby 
hood,  and  washed  her  face  with  his  handkerchief 
when  she  fell  into  a  mud-puddle  —  that  in  later 
years  he  had  a  bank  in  town  and  dropped  in 
occasionally  of  an  evening  to  talk  politics  and 
per  cents,  or  discussed  garden  seeds  and  sweet 
cider  across  the  old  gray  orchard  walls.  Who 
could  expect  knight  in  such  guise  ? 

And  yet,  man  of  money,  and  notes,  and  Scotch 
tweed  as  he  was,  what  could  the  love  of  poetry 
and  romance  be  that  his  was  not  ?  What  could 
be  more  stanch,  more  long-suffering,  more  unself 
ish,  more  slow  to  grasp,  more  generous  to  give  ? 
What  of  fervor  or  of  fineness  did  this  love  lack  ? 
And  O,  what  use  to  argue,  or  question,  or  justify, 
since  here  was  the  dreadful  degrading  fact  that 
she  had  failed  to  recognize  it,  had  rejected  it 
almost  scornfully,  had  turned  aside  to  a  meaner 
—  meaner  what  ?  She  was  not  yet  sunk  so  low 
as  to  call  that  love  !  Kate  said  to  herself,  with  a 
little  thrill  of  exultation  that  even  in  her  low  and 
lost  estate  there  were  depths  into  which  she  dis 
dained  to  descend.  But  it  was  not  Walter  that 
she  blamed.  Far  from  it.  He  simply  lived  after 
his  kind.  He  was  as  he  was  made.  He  loved 


270  FIRST  LOVE  IS  BEST. 

better  than  he  lived,  thought  Kate,  forgetting 
for  a  moment  her  self-abasement  and  reverting 
to  her  original  opinions  of  herself  before  her 
misguided  experience  had  laid  her  self-respect  in 
ruins.  It  was  not  his  fault  that  there  was  no 
force  in  him  to  command  either  happiness  or 
prosperity.  It  was  her  fault  not  to  have  seen  his 
feebleness,  poor  dear !  to  have  fancied  for  a  mo 
ment  that  those  dark,  restless  eyes,  or  even 
those  dark  and  languid  eyes,  could  pierce  to  the 
substance  of  things.  But  had  she  done  any 
better,  seen  any  clearer  herself?  O,  why  did 
she  presume  to  look  down  upon  Walter  Laballe  ? 
He  was  as  good  as  she.  He  had  blundered  no 
more  than  she.  It  was  a  fit  match  for  her.  A 
woman  can  rise  no  higher  than  her  love.  The 
measure  of  the  man  she  loves  is  the  measure  of 
her  own  capacity.  Mr.  Glynn  should  have  stood 
aside  and  left  her  to  plod  along  the  valley  lands 
to  which  she  was  born.  She  was  not  good 
enough  for  him.  She  was  altogether  too  trivial 
and  insensate,  altogether  shallow  and  frivolous. 
But  then  he  loved  Tier!  That  was  the  worst 
thing  she  knew  about  him.  Why  had  he  pinned 
his  faith  to  such  a  broken  reed?  asked  Kate, 
forgetful  of  the  decorum  due  to  metaphors. 
Yet,  except  for  that  fatal  feebleness,  how  noble 
had  his  trust  been,  how  magnanimous !  Why, 
said  Kate,  feeling  about  for  adequate  expression, 
he  is  —  he  is  the  best  man  I  ever  knew  ! 


XVII. 

T7"  ATRINA,  I  think  it  is  time  for  you  to  come 
J\_  to  moorings,"  broke  in  a  cheerful  voice, 
the  voice  of  the  best  man  she  ever  knew,  upon 
one  of  her  numerous  mental  diatribes.  She  had 
been  pacing  back  and  forth  through  the  twilight 
parlors  with  an  energy  of  abstraction,  and  Mr. 
Glynn  had  been  noting  her  for  the  last  few 
moments  through  the  open  door  of  the  library 
across  the  hall.  Kate  went  in  to  him  instantly, 
glad  to  be  diverted  from  her  own  unsatisfactory 
thoughts.  "I  am  sure  you  must  have  got  to 
the  sixth  act  of  your  tragedy  by  this  time." 

"  It  is  a  kind  of  tragedy,"  said  Kate. 

"What  is?" 

"  O !  "  cried  Kate,  with  barefaced  and  instant 
ly  detected  fraud,  but  frightened  at  the  possi 
bility  of  being  forced  into  an  explanation,  and 
catching  the  sudden  sparkle  of  stars  through  the 
broad  bay-window,  —  "  O,  I  feel  dislodged  and 
discouraged.  I  always  thought  we  had  the  stars 
to  go  to  as  a  last  resort.  And  it  was  so  sociable 

271 


272  FIRST  LOVE  IS  BEST. 

to  look  at  them  and  send  up  friendly  thoughts  to 
our  unknown  kinfolk.  And  now  they  are  all 
turned  into  suns,  and  the  sun  is  a  great  roaring 
hurricane  of  flaming  gas,  and  there  is  no  living 
with  him,  and  I  feel  lonesome." 

"  I  would  not  mind  it,  Katy.  Perhaps  they 
are  a  salamander-folk,  and  like  that  kind  of 
thing." 

"But  that  new  invention  has  felt  out  and 
found  that  the  worlds  are  made  of  the  same 
stuff  we  are,  — iron,  and  magnesium,  and  such,  — 
so  of  course  the  people  must  be  like  us  too." 

"  Not  certainly,  if  you  are  bent  on  company. 
Fishes  are  made  of  the  same  *  stuff '  we  are,  but 
you  can't  live  in  the  water,  Mrs.  Katy,  and  a  trout 
can  as  long  as  you  will  let  him,  and  that  is  a 
good  while  for  all  your  hook  harms  him.  You 
can't  slip  up  into  the  air  either,  when  the  whim 
takes  you,  but  the  thrush  can.  Depends  on  how 
you  mix  things,  don't  you  see  ?  " 

"  It  is  not  I  that  mix  things.  I  had  it  all 
nicely  arranged  long  ago.  I  knew  just  how  the 
world  was  made,  and  the  whole  universe  run 
ning.  But  now  everything  is  unsettled,  and  we 
do  not  really  know  anything." 

"  Then  of  course  we  don't  know  that  people 
cannot  live  at  a  white  heat,  so  it  is  as  broad  as 
it  is  long." 

"  Only  the  analogy  is  against  it  instead  of  for 


A   SENTIMENTAL  SKETCH.  273 

it.     Everything  ought  to  tend   one  way  when 
you  never  can  get  exact  proof." 

"  Well,  you  can  get  some  comfort  out  of  your 
analogies  if  you  must  have  it.  Suppose  the  sun 
is  not  inhabitable,  and  the  stars  are  all  suns.  We 
know  that  one  sun  has  planets  swinging  around 
it,  and  the  only  one  of  those  planets  whose  con 
dition  we  certainly  know  is  inhabited  by  a  thou 
sand  millions  of  souls,  as  we  facetiously  call 
them,  and  the  sun  keeps  them  in  fuel  and 
board  and  clothing.  Now  why  not  suppose  that 
the  other  suns  also  have  their  little  families  to 
support?  We  do  not  see  them,  but  it  is  the 
instinct  and  charm  of  domestic  life  to  seclude 
itself.  The  suns  stalk  through  the  skies,  carry 
ing  on  their  business,  seen  of  men ;  but  the 
homes  of  heaven  are  hidden." 

"  Why,  yes  ;  I  think  I  like  that." 

"  Of  course.  When  you  are  in  trouble,  come 
to  me.  I  shall  never  allow  a  few  little  universes 
to  stand  in  the  way  of  your  peace  of  mind." 

"  That  is  what  the  Bible  says,  too.  '  Canst 
thou  guide  Arcturua  with  his  sons  ?  '  His  sons 
of  course  are  his  planets,  that  are  dependent 
upon  him." 

"  That  is  right,  Katy  ;  back  me  up  with  good 
Scriptural  authority." 

"  Only  I  don't  feel  quite  so  sure  of  the  planets 
as  I  did.     I  did  not  mind  giving  up  the  moon." 
18 


274  FIRST  LOVE  IS  BEST. 

"  No  ?  Now  I  always  felt  rather  attached  to 
the  moon  myself.  Our  next-door  neighbor." 

"  Yes  ;  and  it  is  quite  desolate  to  think  of  the 
bleak,  cold,  dark  silence  up  there.  But  you  can 
remember  that  it  was  once  a  pleasant,  peopled, 
possible  world.  But  the  other  planets  don't  keep 
faith.  Look  at  Jupiter  yonder  —  so  splendid  he 
looks,  and  when  you  get  to  him  he  is  only  a 
great,  gloomy  swash  of  warm  water." 

"  I  would  not  go,  Katy.  Give  it  all  up- 
Nothing  is  so  unpleasant  as  to  be  living  in  hot 
water  all  the  time." 

"You  have  got  to  live  in  hot  water  if  you 
depend  on  the  stars.  Now  if  there  was  anything 
I  was  sure  of,  it  was  '  Saturn  seven  and  two 
broad  rings,'  for  I  learned  it  when  I  was  a  speck 
of  a  girl." 

"  I  hope  you  are  not  laying  up  any  grudge 
against  Saturn.  I  have  special  interest  there." 

"  Only  that  he  is  fickle  like  all  the  rest  of 
them.  His  two  broad  rings  are  three  rings, 
then  they  are  many  rings,  then  they  are  whole 
systems  of  rings,  and  suddenly  everything  is 
rings." 

"  Exactly,  Kate.  That  is  why  you  must  keep 
the  peace  with  Saturn.  We  can't  afford  to 
lose  him,  for  there  i.s  where  Nature  is  caught  in 
the  act  of  world-making." 

"  What  do  you  mean  ?  " 


A   SENTIMENTAL  SKETCH.  £75 

"  Well,  dear,  I  am  not  so  well  up  in  my 
astronomy  as  you  seem  to  be." 

"  O,  I  was  always  devoted  to  the  stars ;  but 
two  or  three  days  ago  I  came  across  that  big 
book  with  the  pictures,  and  I  have  been  read 
ing  it  ever  since ;  but  what  do  you  mean  by 
Saturn  ?  " 

"Is  not  the  last  guess  at  creation  a  waltz? 
The  gas  whirled  itself  into  rings,  and  the  whirl 
ing  rings  break  up  into  suns,  and  the  suns  keep 
at  it  and  whirl  off  other  rings  which  presently 
break  up  into  planets,  and  the  planets  whirl  off 
other  rings  which  break  up  into  moons.  For 
proof,  Saturn  got  a  little  behindhand,  so  we 
caught  him  before  his  jig  was  up,  rings  and 
all." 

"Do  you  suppose  Saturn's  rings  are  on  the 
way  to  be  broken  ?  " 

"  Should  not  wonder.  There  seems  to  be 
a  good  deal  of  uncertainty  in  real  estate  up 
there." 

"  If  the  rings  are  not  solid,  but  little  bits  of 
separate  bodies  dancing  around  close  together 
and  keeping  time,  I  don't  see  why  they  should 
ever  break  rank." 

"  They  must  keep  time  in  order  to  keep  up. 
If  the  rings  did  not  wabble  but  spun  around 
stiff,  they  would  come  down  thump !  on  Saturn 
at  the  slightest  provocation.  Accordingly  they 
wabble.  But  there  seems  to  be  a  new  one  put- 


276  FIRST  LOVE  IS  BEST. 

ting  in  an  appearance,  and  does  not  somebody 
say  the  old  ones  are  widening  at  the  rate  of 
thirty  miles  a  day,  or  so  ?  That  is  '  made  land  ' 
worth  talking  about.  What  are  your  '  back  bay,' 
or  Zuyder  Zee,  compared  with  such  operations  in 
civil-engineering?  " 

"  And  of  course  if  they  keep  widening,  they 
must  touch  in  time." 

"  And  when  they  do  touch,  won't  the  fur 
fly?" 

"  Is  it  not  dizzying  just  to  think  of  it?  " 

"  Well,  these  fellows  have  a  long  way  to  go. 
They  can't  afford  to  let  the  grass  grow  under 
their  feet.  On  the  whole,  it  is  rather  encourag 
ing  to  us  slow  coaches  that  though  our  friend  at 
the  end  of  the  lane  is  whizzing  along  totally 
regardless  of  his  wind,  it  takes  him  a  hundred 
and  sixty-five  years  to  lumber  around  the  sun 
once." 

"  And  it  is  such  a  poor  little  sun  for  him  to 
lumber  round,  too.  I  should  not  think  it  would 
answer." 

"  Suppose  he  should  come  to  the  conclusion 
that  it  did  not  answer,  what  could  he  do  about 
it  ?  Go  it  alone  ?  Smash  himself  up  into  broken 
crockery  like  the  asteroids  ?  Would  not  you 
like  to  live  on  one  of  those  little  pocket-planets 
pirouetting  about  among  the  steady  old  stars  ? 
Just  think  of  it,  you  could  make  the  tour  of  the 
world  in  a  day  and  come  home  to  early  tea." 


A   SENTIMENTAL  SKETCH.  277 

"  But  there  is  another  reasonable  little  theory 
gone  ;  for  your  big  book  says  they  are  not  broken 
crockery,  but  were  made  so.  What  could  be 
nicer  than  to  have  one  world  surely  broken  up 
and  flying  around  in  pieces?" 

"  I  should  say  a  world  flying  around  whole.  I 
think  I  like  that  way  best  myself." 

"  Not  for  a  theory.  The  worlds  have  got  to 
come  to  some  kind  of  an  end." 

"  Don't  be  impatient ;  the  sun  may  get  out  of 
fuel  any  day  and  grab  us." 

"  But  if  you  are  glad  to  see  a  world  making, 
like  Saturn,  why  should  you  not  be  glad  to  see  a 
world  breaking  up  ?  It  corresponds.  I  did  not 
object  to  your  Saturn.  You  ought  to  come  to 
the  defence  of  my  asteroids." 

"  I  will,  Katy.  I  am  ready  to  testify  that  I 
saw  the  pieces.  Seeing  is  believing." 

"  Not  even  that.  For  we  have  seen  the  stars 
burning  up  and  going  out.  But  now  the  big 
book  says  no  —  they  are  not  burning  stars  at  all, 
but  variable  stars  probably,  and  will  be  just  as 
bright  again  presently." 

"  This  fable  teaches  that  what  with  telescope 
and  spectroscope,  and  imaginative  scope,  Astrono 
my  has  made  great  strides  in  ignorance  since  you 
and  I  were  young." 

"  Sometimes  it  makes  me  faint-hearted  to  think 
of  it  all.  Does  it  seem  as  if  this  great,  glowing, 
rushing  universe  could  have  taken  such  an 


278  FIRST  LOVE  IS  BEST. 

eternity  to  form,  and  then  we  little  insignificant 
creatures  be  made  and  stuck  on  the  outside  ?  " 

"  Think  we  grew  up  out  of  the  iron  and 
magnesium,  do  you?" 

"  Well,  it  looks  just  as  if  simple  matter  kept 
growing  more  and  more  complex  till  it  became 
us.  If  I  did  not  know  I  was  alive,  I  should  not 
think  I  could  be.  I  should  think  I  was  a  sort 
of  animated  weed — just  Tennyson's  Talking 
Oak." 

"  But  there,  Kate,  you  have  hit  on  the  vital 
point  —  consciousness.  There  comes  in  some 
thing  wholly  new.  No  gas  whirls  that  off." 

"  But  it  seems  to  come  up  slowly  out  of  the 
dust  through  flies,  and  canaries,  and  dogs,  and 
horses,  to  us." 

"No,  Katy.  I  should  say  that  the  shadow, 
the  symbol  of  it,  comes  up  slowly  out  of  matter 
till  it  reaches  us,  and  the  divine  afflatus  comes 
down  lowly,  out  of  mind,  till  it  reaches  us ;  but 
betwixt  the  two  there  is  a  great  gulf  fixed. 
Matter  becomes  ever  finer,  more  delicately 
organized,  more  exquisitely  sensitive,  till  it  is  fit 
to  receive  the  breath  of  the  higher  life  ;  but  I 
see  no  sign  whatever  that  this  higher  life  is 
evolved  out  of  the  organism." 

"  And  if  the  gas  does  whirl  itself  into  worlds, 
something  must  have  set  it  spinning  in  the  first 
place,  and  our  little  spark  of  life  came  from  that. 
I  hate  to  think  I  just  grew  up  like  a  toadstool." 


A   SENTIMENTAL  SKETCH.  279 

"A  toadstool  has  a  long  life  compared  with 
you,  my  Katy,  if  this  is  all.  But  if  Nature  runs 
the  firm  economically  as  she  pretends,  I  cannot 
think  she  would  be  so  extravagant  as  to  destroy 
mental  force,  which  is  a  far  more  difficult  pro 
duction,  so  to  speak,  than  physical  force." 

"  And  better  worth  preserving,  I  hope  Nature 
thinks." 

"So  she  should.  What  is  the  use  in  your 
talking  about  insignificance,  Katy  ?  We  are  not 
as  big  as  Jupiter,  if  that  is  what  you  mean  ;  but 
we  would  knock  Jupiter  into  a  cocked  hat  any 
day  to  save  the  life  of  one  man.  What  is 
twenty-five  thousand  miles  of  granite  and  iron 
and  trap-rock,  compared  to  five  feet  of  sweet 
little  feminine  flesh  and  fire?" 

"  Five  feet  two,"  said  Kate,  demurely. 

"  Is  that  so  ?  Certainly.  Science  should  be 
exact." 

"  What  you  mean  is,  that  the  worlds  were 
made  for  us,  not  we  for  the  worlds." 

"  Exactly.  There  never  was,  to  my  thinking, 
anything  more  intrinsically  absurd  than  the  no 
tion  that  matter  is  eternal  and  mind  ephemeral. 
A  lot  of  great  lumpish  globes,  that  never  knew 
they  existed,  and  take  up  more  room  than  all 
their  generations  of  men,  streaking  around  in 
space  forever,  and  the  living  beings  who  alone 
make  these  globes  of  the  smallest  value  perish 


280  FIRST  LOVE  IS  BEST. 

in  a  day !  You  can't  make  me  believe  Nature  is 
such  a  blockhead." 

"  I  like  to  hear  you  say  that,  because  that 
means  future  life." 

"  I  hope  so." 

"  And  that  God  made  the  world." 

"I  think  so." 

"  Can't  you  say  you  know  so  ?" 

"I  think  there  must  be,  behind  all  worlds  and 
all  existences,  a  great  First  Cause,  but  as  I  look 
around,  all  that  I  see  is  man." 

"  Mr.  Glynn,  what  are  you?  " 

'•''Homo  sum." 

"  But  you  are  not  a  real  born  Orthodox, 
though  of  course  you  go  to  that  church  —  I  sup 
pose  because  there  is  no  other." 

"  Happens,  Katy,  a  born  Orthodox  is  just  what 
I  am.  Being  reared  under  Orthodoxy,  I  nat 
urally  saw  its  objectionable  points  more  clearly ; 
too  clearly,  perhaps,  to  be  Orthodox  by  adoption." 

"  O,  no  !  I  was  born  there  too,  and  I  never 
want  to  be  born  again." 

"  That  must  be  Kitty's  Sixth  Point  of  Cal 
vinism.  I  don't  recognize  it  as  one  of  the  origi 
nal  Five." 

"  Just  as  good.  I  don't  believe  in  leaving 
your  own  religion,  whatever  it  is.  I  go  for  my 
country,  right  or  wrong ;  '  when  right  to  be  kept 
right,  when  wrong  to  be  put  right.'  " 


A  SENTIMENTAL  SKETCH.  281 

"An  admirable  sentiment!  And  Orthodoxy 
is  an  admirable  creed  to  sharpen  its  teeth  on." 

"  You  don't  hate  Orthodoxy,  I  hope." 

"  O,  no  !  it  was  the  faith  of  my  fathers  ;  but 
it  is  a  grim  faith,  my  dear,  and  it  requires  a 
good  deal  of  ingenuity  to  get  the  hateful  ness 
out  of  it.  I  think  you  could  do  it  if  any  one 
could.  I  think  even  a  free-thinker  could  stand 
a  dose  of  Orthodoxy  dissolved  in  Katherine." 

"  Do  you  mean  future  punishment?  " 

"  I  don't  really  know  that  Orthodoxy  is  any 
more  menaced  by  future  punishment  than  by  the 
sin  and  suffering  that  are  visibly  rampaging 
through  this  world." 

"  And  you  can't  think  it  all  comes  from  Ad 
am's  sin,  and  that  we  suffer  for  what  we  never 
did,  thousands  of  years  before  we  were  born  ?  " 

"  Well,  my  Katy,  with  you  sitting  here  by  me, 
I  feel  so  certain  that  in  Adam's  case  I  should 
have  eaten  too,  that  I  have  not  the  heart  to  be 
hard  upon  him ;  and  I  must  say  I  think  it  was 
rather  plucky  and  patriotic  for  those  old  divines 
to  stand  up  like  a  man  and  a  brother  and  divide 
the  responsibility. 

'  In  Adam's  fall, 
We  sinned  all.' 

No  shirking  there.     That  is  true  Catholicism  !  " 
"  You  can't  be  a  Unitarian,  then." 
"  I  don't  know  that  I  want  to  be  ;  but  if  I  did, 

what's   to   hinder?     The    Unitarians   make  the 


282  FIRST  LOVE  IS  BEST. 

least  possible  ado  about  it.  Any  one  who  has 
no  creed  at  all,  but  merely  believes  he  ought  to 
be  decent,  is  allowed  to  call  himself  a  Unitarian. 
I  think  I  could  come  in  on  that  count." 

"  You  would  have  to  give  up  your  total  de 
pravity,  then." 

"  It  would  be  no  great  sacrifice.  I  don't  set 
such  store  by  it  as  you  Orthodox  do,  though 
your  belief  in  it  is  very  much  mitigated  by  your 
unbelief." 

"  Why,  I  believe  in  it.     Don't  you  ?  " 

"  Well,  I  shut  myself  up  sometimes  on  Sun 
days,  and  think  over  what  few  sins  I  am  guilty 
of,  but  somehow  I  can't  make  them  fill  the  bill ; 
and  as  I  look  around  on  my  townsmen,  I  think 
they  are  a  pretty  clever  set  of  fellows.  They 
are  generally  honest  and  civil,  and  they  bear 
each  other's  burdens  most  of  the  time,  though 
they  may  occasionally  set  them  down  and  swear  • 
at  them." 

"  I  am  afraid  that  is  not  the  right  kind  of  sin 
ning  exactly." 

"  Perhaps  not.  In  fact,  I  don't  think  I  know 
what  a  sinner  is.  A  villain  I  know,  and  a 
drunkard  I  know,  and  a  liar  I  know ;  but  a  sin 
ner  is  an  elusive  sort  of  scamp  ;  now  you  see 
him  and  now  you  don't.  On  the  whole,  Katy, 
let  us  stick  to  what  we  know.  Why  should  a 
man  crawl  before  his  Creator  any  more  than  be 
fore  his  neighbor?  It  can  be  no  God  who  is 


A   SENTIMENTAL  SKETCH.  283 

pleased  with  abjectness.  I  like  to  see  a  man 
stand  up  cheerful  and  hearty,  and  say,  '  Here 
I  am,  Lord,  as  upright  as  I  know  how  to  be, 
strong  and  healthy,  and  ready  to  put  my  shoul 
der  to  the  wheel.'  " 

"And  yet  one  does  despise  one's  self  some 
times,"  said  Kate,  with  fresh  memory  of  her  late 
mental  castigations. 

"  One  despises  one's  self  for  definite  folly,  or 
treachery,  or  badness  of  some  sort ;  not  in  a  gen 
eral  way,  as  a  work  of  art.  We  must  not  be  too 
hard  upon  ourselves,  lest  we  thereby  reflect  upon 
our  Creator." 

"  But,"  said  Katherine,  softly,  hesitatingly, 
"  we  must  have  needed  Christ  —  some  way." 

"  If  we  needed  him,  he  came." 

"But  he  did  come.  Surely  you  do  believe 
that?" 

"  Would  it  grieve  you  if  I  did  not  ?  "  he  smiled 
down  upon  her. 

"It  would  sadden  me  inexpressibly,"  said 
Kate,  with  no  smile  in  her  earnestness.  "  I  am 
not  good :  it  is  not  that ;  I  know  that  I  am  not 
a  good  Christian  at  all.  You  are  infinitely  bet 
ter  than  I  am  :  it  is  not  that.  You  must  not 
think  of  judging  by  me.  You  will  never  think 
that  I  think  I  am  better  than  you  because  I  be 
long  to  the  church  ?  But  I  should  like  —  " 

"  I  shall  never  think  anything  of  you  that  is 
not  sweet  and  good.  You  may  be  sure  of  that. 


284  FIRST  LOVE  IS  BEST. 

But,  my  darling,  if  there  is  a  God  who  made  the 
world,  he  meant  well  by  the  world  he  made. 
You  may  be  sure  of  that,  too.  The  Christ  of 
history  came  a  long  while  ago,  and  I  confess  the 
evidence  is  not  quite  clear  to  me,  and  the  philos 
ophy  of  it  is  wholly  obscure." 

"  But  you  are  willing  to  believe  ?  " 

"  Perfectly.  A  God  would  certainly  save  his 
world  somehow.  If  by  a  Christ,  then  so  ;  if  not, 
then  some  other  way.  But  he  would  certainly 
save  it.  Otherwise  he  would  not  be  God. 
Whatever  his  way,  I  accept  it  as  the  best  pos 
sible.  But  I  don't  feel  sure  of  the  way.  Does 
that  distress  you,  Katy  ?  " 

"  O,  I  am  sure  you  yourself  must  be  right, 
whatever  you  believe.  I  wish  you  could  be 
more  certain,  because  then  I  could  be.  It  would 
be  dreadful  to  lose  out  of  this  life  the  certain 
faith  in  another." 

"  It  would  be  very  confusing.  Unless  there  is 
another,  this  certainly  is  wholly  illogical,  and  its 
Creator  has  a  good  deal  to  answer  for.  We  are 
limited  in  every  direction,  and  we  can  afford  to 
wait  for  full  understanding.  As  at  present  ad 
vised,  I  do  not  understand,  and  I  cannot  afford 
to  say  that  I  do." 

"  Do  you  not  like  to  think  of  the  other  world  ? 
Don't  you  think  that  just  the  possibility  of 
Heaven  is  a  great  comfort  and  consolation  ?  " 


A   SENTIMENTAL  SKETCH.  285 

"  Do  you  not  think  we  shall  both  of  us  feel 
more  at  home  down  here  than  we  shall  there  ?  " 

"  O,  no,  indeed.  I  think  that  is  the  real  home, 
where  we  shall  never  feel  strange  or  out  of 
place.  If  I  am  only  good  enough  to  go,  or  if  I 
am  somehow  let  in  without  being  very  good,  —  as 
I  am  afraid  I  shall  have  to  be  if  I  get  in  at  all,  — 
that  will  be  enough.  How  can  it  be  that  you 
do  not  care  for  it  ?  " 

"  My  dear,  what  can  there  possibly  be  in  that 
land  that  I  care  for  ?  " 

"  Why,  everything." 

"Yes,  only  I  take  no  especial  pleasure  in 
everything.  I  want  something.  That  future  is 
wholly  indefinite.  Ministers  either  follow  St. 
John  into  his  revelations  about  four  and  twenty 
elders,  and  beasts  with  seven  heads  and  ten 
horns,  which  mean  absolutely  nothing  to  me,  or 
else  they  leave  the  blessed  where  novelists  leave 
their  heroes  and  heroines,  —  at  the  very  entrance 
of  Paradise." 

"That  I  suppose  is  inevitable,  because  we 
cannot  now  comprehend  that  world.  The  blind 
have  no  conception  of  light  or  color,  yet  light 
and  color  exist." 

"  But  if  I  can  have  no  conception  of  Heaven, 
how  can  it  be  real  to  me  ?  " 

"  Can't  you  think  how  nice  it  would  be  never 
to  be  afraid,  never  to  make  mistakes,  or  do  any 
thing  wicked  ?  To  see  all  the  people  who  are 


286  FIRST  LOVE  IS  BEST. 

there  —  our  own,  and  all  the  people  we  could 
never  see  in  this  world?  Think  of  St.  Paul 
telling  you  all  about  his  coming  to  Great  Brit 
ain  !  I  should  not  wonder  if  he  would  like  to 
do  it.  And  Boadicea  perhaps  sitting  by,  and 
putting  in  a  word  now  and  then,  poor  thing  !  " 

"  Yes  ;  and  I  might  find  Abraham  interesting 
in  the  way  of  early  history;  and  Moses  would 
be  good  authority  in  law.  Cain,  the  leading 
agriculturist  of  his  race,  might  or  might  not  be 
of  my  company.  You  may  chat  with  Paul,  if 
you  please ;  but  I  consider  his  style  rather  too 
logical  and  hard  for  light  conversation.  But, 
my  Katy,  the  world  beyond  would  look  pleas- 
anter  to  me  if,  instead  of  sitting  and  talking 
with  Moses  and  the  Prophets,  I  could  be  sure 
of  you." 

"  O,"  said  Kate,  softly,  "  but  I  feel  sure  of 
those  we  love." 

"  How  '  sure  '  ?  I  look  at  you,  and  see  you 
fresh  and  changing.  I  hear  you,  and  your  voice 
is  clear  and  cordial.  I  take  your  hand,  and  the 
touch  is  sweet  to  me.  How  shall  I  come  at  you 
when  the  only  medium  by  which  now  we  meet 
is  gone  back  into  the  dust  whence  it  came  ?  " 

"  It  sounds  very  dreary,"  said  Kate,  with  fill 
ing  eyes. 

"It  is  not  dreary,  my  darling  —  or  only  dreary 
when  we  try  to  reason  it  out  —  to  pass  from  the 
indefinite  to  the  definite.  I  am  not  anxious  or 


A   SENTIMENTAL  SKETCH.  287 

despairing  about  the  future.  I  have  a  very 
great  hope  that  the  same  Power  which  set  us  in 
this  world  will  give  us  a  large  life  beyond.  But 
I  can  do  nothing  to  bring  that  about.  What  I 
know  is  that  it  is  good  for  this  world  to  be  hon 
est  and  kind,  and  I  do  not  think  it  can  be  bad 
for  any  world.  I  cannot  see  that  it  is  worth 
while  to  trouble  ourselves  with  preparations  for 
a  world  of  which  we  know  so  little  ;  but  it  is  in 
the  highest  degree  worth  while  to  make  the  most 
of  the  one  world  we  are  sure  of.  God,  if  He 
exist  at  all,  is  just  as  much  the  God  of  this 
world  as  of  any  other,  and  we  can  never  be  any 
more  in  His  presence  than  we  are  every  moment 
of  our  lives.  There  is  nothing  better  than 
brightness  and  goodness  and  love  within  the 
limits  of  my  imagination.  Is  there  in  yours, 
Katy?" 

"  Nothing  can  be  better." 

"And  that  we  can  do,  be,  have,  and  enjoy 
here.  I  hope,"  he  added,  more  lightly,  and  with  a 
half-smile,  —  "I  hope  there  is  a  world  where  my 
little  Katy  will  find  it  in  her  heart  to  love  me ; 
but  I  own  I  should  feel  more  sure  of  her  if  she 
could  love  me  a  little  here." 

Kate  flashed  upon  him  a  glance  of  sudden, 
eager  inquiry.  "  Do  you  care  for  me  still  ?  "  she 
asked,  obeying  some  swift,  strange  impulse. 

"  Do  I  care  for  you !  —  " 

"  Would  you  care  for  me  if  you  knew  —  if  I 


288  FIRST  LOVE  IS  BEST. 

were  —  if  you  knew  —  everything  ?  "  and  in  un 
controllable  agony  of  shyness  and  shame,  Kate 
sank  at  his  feet  and  buried  her  face  in  his  hands. 

"My  darling!  my  dearest!"  he  cried,  shocked 
by  this  unlooked-for  and  seemingly  uncaused  out 
burst.  Unmindful  of  pledge  or  pact,  he  drew 
her  into  his  arms  and  clasped  her  and  kissed  her, 
and  strove  to  soothe  and  reassure  her  with  every 
endearing  word  and  fond  caress.  "  Tell  me 
everything,  little  Katy.  Nothing  is  so  bad  as 
that  you  should  not  trust  me  wholly.  I  am  sure 
you  are  disquieting  yourself  in  vain.  Tell  me 
what  it  is  that  troubles  you,  darling.  There  is 
not  a  thought  in  your  heart  that  you  need  be 
afraid  to  show  me.  I  will  smooth  it  all  away ; 
only  trust  me."  For  still  his  fatuous  mind  went 
meandering  about  after  some  offence  that  Kate 
imagined  herself  to  have  perpetrated  by  a  lin 
gering  love  for  the  old  lover  so  lately  met,  so 
lothly  left,  as  his  own  eyes  had  seen.  Kate  did 
not  answer  him,  but  she  clung  to  him  with  un 
heeding  energy ;  and  when  he  fain  would  have 
got  a  glimpse  into  her  eyes  she  wedged  and 
wormed  her  tousled  little  head  in  among  his  va 
rious  coat-collars  with  such  desperate  vehemence 
to  hide  her  burning  face,  that  presently  even 
into  his  dull,  slow,  stolid,  commonplace,  banking- 
house  brain  penetrated  some  faint  glimmer  of  the 
eternal  truth  of  things. 

And  then,  of  course,  he  had  it  all  his  own  way. 


XVIII. 

KATE'S  troubles  were  over,  and  my  story  is 
told.  It  is  not  so  much  of  a  story  as  it 
would  have  been  if  Kate  had  not  had  a  way  of 
slipping  out  of  every  situation  provided  for  her, 
by  virtue  of  a  simple  but  sturdy,  native  honesty. 
Several  times  in  her  life  had  circumstances  so 
arranged  themselves  around  her  as  to  need  but 
her  helping  hand  to  produce  an  excellent  tragedy, 
and  Kate  walked  straight  out  of  them  every  time. 
She  had  not  head  enough  to  perceive  their  capa 
bilities,  but  she  had  heart  enough  to  discern  their 
duties.  She  was  no  poet,  artist,  saint,  or  genius 
of  any  kind  ;  she  had  only  her  common  sense, 
such  as  it  was,  and  her  rectitude  —  both  in  the 
blood.  She  knew  nothing  of  fate,  or  tempera 
ment,  or  temptation  ;  she  only  tried  heartily  and 
humbly  to  be  good  —  cheerful,  and  helpful,  and 
true  —  in  whatever  position  she  found  herself, 
even  though  it  were  a  position  not  at  all  to  her 
mind,  and  in  entire  opposition  to  her  efforts. 
How  can  you  make  a  tragedy  with  such  mate- 
19  289 


290  FIRST  LOVE  IS  BEST. 

rial  ?  Only  by  fibbing,  of  course  ;  and  I  have 
permanently  alienated  two  of  my  best  friends 
by  firmly  refusing  to  do  just  that.  "  O,"  says 
my  friend,  the  Woman,  seeing  Katherine  ruth 
lessly  married  to  her  body-snatcher,  "  there  you 
have  a  strong  situation  for  tragedy,  for  of  course 
her  love  for  that  little  whipper-snapper  is  not 
going  to  last,  and  she  will  fall  in  love  with  the 
Great  Unknown."  That  is  Woman's  way  out,  — 
is  it?  "Now,"  says  my  friend,  the  Man,  at  a 
little  earlier  stage  of  Katherine's  life,  "  you  must 
have  a  tragedy  here.  Make  her,  out  of  sheer 
pity  and  sympathy,  almost  compromise  herself 
with  one,  and  the  other  come  to  the  rescue  and 
overpower  her  with  his  generosity."  So  that  is 
the  Man's  way  out, — is  it?  Get  thee  behind 
me,  Satan.  I  will  have  neither  my  Katherine's 
honor  nor  her  dignity  sacrificed  to  the  exigen 
cies  of  your  pitiless  High  Art.  Slay  your  own 
friends,  if  you  will,  with  the  sword  of  your  evil 
spirit,  but  Kate  shall  not  be  laid  on  your  altar. 
Lie  under  the  boundary-wall  of  morality,  and 
dream  your  sweet  dreams  of  forbidden  fruit 
beyond,  but  I  will  stand  by  the  facts.  And  if  a 
hot,  spiced,  high-seasoned  world  finds  the  flavor 
but  insipid,  the  world  must  make  shift  to  bear 
it  alone  ;  they  shall  have  no  help  from  Kate. 
For,  as  I  said,  Kate's  troubles  were  over.  I  do 
not  mean  that  she  was  miraculously  or  excep 
tionally  exempt  from  the  disturbances  and  per- 


A  SENTIMENTAL  SKETCH.  291 

plexities  of  earth  ;  but  the  centre  of  her  life  was 
transferred  to  another,  to  a  strong,  noble,  self- 
restrained  nature  :  and  whatever  of  sorrow  came 
to  her  was  softened,  and  whatever  of  joy  was 
sweetened  by  the  sympathy,  the  confidence,  the 
love  which  wrapped  her  around  like  an  atmos 
phere.  It  was  long  before  she  understood  what 
had  happened  to  her.  Brooding  over  her  own 
heart  alone,  she  had  involved  herself  in  a  tangle 
of  doubt  and  dread.  She  had  failed  to  justify 
herself  to  herself.  Deploring  alike  her  love  and 
her  lack  of  love,  she  mistrusted  even  her  power 
to  love.  She  did  not  know  what  her  feeling  was 
towards  her  husband,  and  she  had  even  ques 
tioned  whether  he  could  himself  care  what  it 
was,  or  set  a  value  on  so  uncertain  and  variable 
a  possession.  She  was  in  danger  of  becoming 
morbid,  introspective,  unhappy.  The  network 
in  which  she  had  ensnared  herself  was  not  the 
less  hampering  or  calamitous  because  it  was  im 
palpable.  But  the  one  moment  which  caught 
her  off  guard  revealed  her  weakness  —  or  was 
it  her  strength  ?  —  and  she  passed  out  of  her 
own  keeping  forever.  Her  husband,  who  was 
perhaps  over-cautious,  or  it  might  be  over-chiv 
alrous,  in  not  levelling  her  defences,  was  not  slow 
to  take  possession  when  once  she  had  left  the 
gates  ajar.  But  what  became'  of  all  her  misgiv 
ings  and  fears,  Kate  never  could  divine.  All 
those  inconsistencies  and  mortifications  and  hu- 


292  FIRST  LOVE  IS  BEST. 

miliations  that  had  enmeshed  her  seemed  to 
have  simply  disappeared.  She  knew  only  that 
whereas  she  had  been  wholly  doubtful  and  ap 
prehensive,  and  whereas  nothing  had  been  ex 
plained  or  denied  or  refuted  —  here  she  was  in 
a  haven  and  heaven  of  peace.  All  the  mist  of 
subtilties  and  gloom  of  forebodings  were  dis 
pelled  in  the  fervid  sunshine  of  a  great,  manly, 
generous  love.  When  she  tried  to  bring  for 
ward  her  self-accusations  for  formal  sentence, 
that  she  might  be  wholly  frank,  she  found  that 
she  had  nothing  to  say.  Her  strongest  crimina 
tions  served  only  to  point  a  jest.  Happiness  car 
ried  all  before  it. 

"  My  love  is  not  worth  anything,"  would  Kate 
say,  shame-faced,  after  some  over-lavishment,  and 
artfully  but  vainly  trying  to  temper  present  weal 
with  past  woe. 

"  Then  you  will  have  no  excuse  for  hoarding 
it,"  would  her  husband  reply,  with  the  most 
cheerful  acquiescence. 

"  Watch  me  closely,"  she  warned  him  with  a 
frown,  when  she  had  grown  more  confident  and 
careless.  "  I  am  a  variable  function.  I  shall 
fall  in  love  with  the  newspaper  agent  or  the 
lightning-rod  man." 

"  I  will  see  you  don't !  "  was  the  succinct 
reply  of  the  unterrified. 

Kate  was  never  tired  of  her  own  love-story. 
In  fact,  it  rather  seemed  to  grow  in  interest  for 


A  SENTIMENTAL  SKETCH.  293 

her ;  and  had  it  not  been  for  that  inexplicable 
folly  of  love  which  makes  one  particular  woman 
charming,  and  everything  which  she  says  and 
does  charming  in  the  eyes  of  one  particular 
man,  Kate,  I  fear,  would  have  bored  her  hus 
band  sadly  with  her  inexhaustible  chatter.  As 
ib  was,  the  best  sermons  that  were  preached  by 
the  ablest  divines,  the  most  exhaustive  pleas  of 
the  most  distinguished  lawyers,  the  most  learned 
financial  or  political  discussions  of  statesmen  and 
economists,  did  not  give  to  this  man  of  college- 
breeding,  and  travel,  and  large  monetary  responsi 
bilities,  half  so  lively  a  pleasure  as  the  saucy, 
sophistical,  contradictory,  and  imperious  love- 
talk  of  this  one  useless  and  ignorant  little  woman. 
A  scientific  and  earnest  world,  bent  on  philan 
thropy  and  the  march  of  intellect,  would  not 
believe  me  if  I  should  say  how  long  this  con 
templative  idiot  would  sit,  listening  to  her  airy 
nothings,  toying  with  her  bright  hair,  watching 
her  flitting  color,  marvelling  at  her  little  shells 
of  ears,  admiring  even  her  modest  gowns,  and 
thinking  —  and  not  always  careful  to  refrain 
from  saying  —  that  never  was  such  a  wonder 
ful,  winsome,  and  altogether  delightful  creature 
as  this  —  just  as  if  ten  thousand  of  them  were 
not  all  around  him,  with  eyes  and  ears  and 
gowns  to  match  —  if  he  would  only  think  so  ! 
44  All  our  story  is  an  underground  story," 
would  Kate  suggest,  slyly  turning  over  the 


294  FIRST  LOVE  IS  BEST. 

hundredth  new  leaf  of  her  own  cherished  ro 
mance.  "  Just  on  the  outside  it  has  a  bad 
look,  —  has  it  not  ?  " 

"  It  did  have  at  one  time." 

"  Ah  !  but  now.  Look  at  it.  It  is  a  two- 
story  story  with  a  basement." 

"  But  the  abasement  was  all  on  my  part.  You 
never  lowered  your  colors." 

"  O,  don't  frivolize  into  wit.  It  always  inter 
rupts  to  have  you  —  levitous  —  when  I  am  seri 
ous.  And  the  abasement  was  on  my  part,  too. 
But  on  the  outside  there  was  no  story  at  all. 
You  and  I  were  just  two  old  neighbors,  and  we 
married." 

"  No  thanks  to  you." 

"  At  any  rate  we  married,  and  there  is  no  help 
for  it.  That  is  the  first  story,  the  chambers.  But 
below  that,  a  poor  young  man  was  engaged  to 
an  ambitious  young  woman  who  dismissed  him, 
though  she  —  well  —  did  not  like  to,  and  mar 
ried  a  rich  man  whom  she  did  not  love.  That 
sounds  well,  —  does  it  not  ?  " 

"  Moral :  Always  discard  a  poor  man  you  love 
for  a  rich  man  you  don't,  eh  ?  " 

"  Wiry,  it  looks  like  that  certainly.  It  shows 
how  delusive  appearances  are.  Well,  that  is  the 
second  story,  and  an  ugly  old  story  it  is." 

"  But  the  cream  of  the  joke  is  not  there." 

"  No.  All  the  best  part  of  it  is  underground. 
The  first  is  commonplace,  the  second  is  mercen- 


A   SENTIMENTAL  SKETCH.  295 

ary  ;  but  the  real  romance,  the  life  of  life,  is 
where  you  and  I,  under  the  rose,  were  slowly 
feeling  our  way  along  towards  each  other." 

"  Not  a  bit  of  it !  I  found  rny  way  to  you  on 
the  double-quick,  and  then  had  to  wait  in  the 
cold,  while  you  went  chirping  and  fluttering  and 
twittering  around  Robin  Hood's  barn  forever 
and  a  day." 

"  O,"  said  Kate,  with  a  wry  face,  "  that  is 
what  I  never  can  like  to  think  of." 

"  I  should  imagine  not." 

O 

"  You  don't  seem  to  care  about  it  half  so  much 
as  I." 

"  I  have  not  time  to  go  prowling  about  in  the 
prehistoric  ages  for  a  grievance." 

"  It  is  the  one  bitter  drop  in  my  cup." 

"  I  will  take  the  taste  out  of  your  mouth  ; " 
which  he  would  do  effectually  for  the  time 
being. 

But  presently  up  would  come  Katherine  again, 
fresh  with  her  whimsical  regrets. 

"  I  think  there  ought  to  be  a  law  passed  that 
a  girl  should  never  be  engaged  to  any  one  but 
the  man  she  marries." 

"  Move  an  amendment  to  the  Constitution  of 
the  girls,  then,  Katy,  or  give  me  the  pick  of  the 
man." 

"  I  wish,  O,  I  sorely  wish,"  — hiding  her  face 
in  the  ample  provision  made  for  such  contingen- 


296  FIRST  LOVE  IS  BEST. 

cies,  —  "I  had  never  kissed  —  any  one  —  but 

you." 

"  Constructively  you  never  did,  you  know. 
You  could  carry  it  up  on  a  writ  of  error." 

"  Really,  I  never  did.     Really,  myself." 

"  Passive  voice  ?  " 

"  Entirely." 

"  But  Saul  was  consenting  ?  " 

"  Well  —  not  to  say  violently  —  opposing.  I 
wish  I  had  it  not  to  remember." 

"  Much,  Katy  ?  " 

"O  dear!  It  seemed  much  then,  but  —  cir 
cumstances  have  arisen  since  —  so  that  —  now  it 
does  not.  Still,  I  wish  it  had  not  been  at  all. 
You  don't  care  ?  " 

"  Bless  your  dear  heart !  " 

"  I  am  not  sure  it  would  not  be  more  compli 
mentary  to  me  if  you  did  care." 

Or,  in  more  humble  mood,  Kate  would  break 
out,  "  I  never,  never,  never  can  make  up  to  you 
all  that  time  I  wasted." 

"  You  can  try,  though.  It  will  keep  you  in  a 
healthy  frame  of  mind  towards  me." 

"  I  can't  think  of  any  way  to  make  it  even 
between  us  but  for  you  to  stop  loving  me  a  year 
or  two,  and  so  give  me  a  chance  to  catch  up." 

"  All  right.  Only  you  give  the  word  when  I 
am  to  begin." 

"  Richard  Glynn  !  "  towering  aloft  with  indig 
nation,  "  if  I  ever  hear  you  dare  to  dream  that 


A  SENTIMENTAL  SKETCH.  297 

you  will  stop  loving  me  on  any  pretext  what 
ever  !  It  was  your  own  self  did  it.  You  just 
bounced  upon  me  out  of  a  clear  sky,"  —  Kate 
was  ever  reckless  in  tropes,  —  "  and  would 
have  ruined  us  both  if  I  had  not  intervened.  I 
never  saw  any  one  act  so  entirely  without  intel 
ligence." 

"  Bounced !  I  wonder  what  form  of  fixity  you 
would  call  slowness !  I  courted  you  steadily  from 
the  time  you  were  two  years  old." 

"  O,  two~37ear-old  courting  does  not  count.  It 
is  just  as  I  said.  I  was  all  ready  to  love  you. 
You  were  just  the  kind  of  man  I  had  made  up 
my  mind  for.  But  instead  of  letting  me  know 
it,  you  kept  on  digging  potatoes,  and  one  day, 
in  course  of  conversation,  rolled  up  your  eyes, 
bang  !  bang !  bang  !  I  am  in  love  with  you, 
Miss  Katherine  !  bang  !  bang  !  bang  !  Natural 
ly  I  thought  3rou  were  a  lunatic.  Any  well- 
brought-up  girl  would  !  " 

"  But  I  got  you,  Katy  !  There  was  method 
in  my  madness,"  said  Mr.  Glynn,  laughing 
heartily  at  Kate's  condensed  novel. 

"  By  the  skin  of  my  teeth.  And  that  was 
just  as  bad.  What  a  horrible  risk  you  ran ! 
Suppose  you  had  happened  not  to  be  you,  but 
an  indifferent  sort  of  person,  and  the  real  you 
were  somebody  else  outside?" 

"  Should  not  care  a  farthing,  Kitty,  so  long  as 
you  were  inside." 


298  FIRST  LOVE  IS  BEST. 

"  Ricardo  ; "  coaxingly,  and  striving  with  an 
abstracted  air  to  bring  his  beard  and  hair  into 
conjunction  upon  the  bridge  of  his  nose,  —  an 
operation  which  could  not  have  been  comfortable 
to  the  subject  of  it,  and  which  was  certainly  un 
becoming,  but  against  which,  in  his  reduced  state 
of  mind,  he  offered  no  further  protest  than  occa 
sional  growls  and  sputterings  when  breathing  was 
too  seriously  tampered  with,  —  "  Ricardo,  am  I 
as  nice  as  you  thought  I  should  be  ?  " 

"O  Lord  I" 

"  Sweet  must  not  swear." 

"  That  isn't  swear;  it's  prayer." 

"Amen,  then." 

"  Ah  !  but,  Katy,  weren't  3^011  hard  to  woo  ?  " 

"  You  need  not  fling  it  up  at  me  if  I  was.  I 
did  not  force  you  into  it,  you  know." 

"  Yes,  you  did.  '  'Twas  the  same  love  that 
spread  the  feast,  that  sweetly  forced  me  in  ; '  and 
when  I  was  in,  did  I  not  have  a  time  taking  the 
kinks  out  of  you  ?  —  a  good  time  too  ?  " 

"  There  never  were  any  kinks  in  me,  and  they 
are  all  in  still.  But  it  was  a  horrible  risk.  I 
wonder  you  dared.  If  you  had  not  happened  to 
be  just  what  you  are,  there  is  no  telling  what 
might  not  have  happened.  Suppose,  instead  of 
loving  you,  I  had  come  to  hate  you  !  " 

"  O,  you  could  not.  I  would  not  have  let 
you.  Think  I  did  not  know  that  before  I  be- 
"can  ?  " 


A   SENTIMENTAL  SKETCH.  299 

"I did  not." 

"  It  was  not  necessary.  I  was  engineering  this 
thing." 

"  What  I  have  always  admired  in  you  was  your 
modesty.  I  fear  now  that  you  are  losing  it.  Lo! 
the  conquering  hero  comes  in  the  tone  of  your 
last  remarks." 

"Comes  to  make  his  blessings  known,  not  hide 
them  under  a  bushel.  You  are  just  learning 
the  a  b  c  of  love,  Katy.  When  you  get  up  into 
the  Differential  Calculus,  say  alongside  where  I 
am  now,  you  will  learn  that  love  knows  as  well 
as  feels  ;  knows  its  own,  and  will  make  sure  of 
it  with  half  a  chance." 

"  I  don't  think  you  have  anything  to  boast  of 
in  that  line.  You  never  made  anything  of  your 
chance  till  you  lost  it." 

"  And  gave  you  no  peace  till  I  got  it  again." 

"  And  not  much  then.  But  I  was  not  bad 
after  everything  was  settled  ;  was  I  ?  Give  me 
so  much  credit." 

"  O,  you  were  jolly  !  We  have  a  good  deal  to 
congratulate  ourselves  on,  Katy-did.  If  I  had 
been  a  knave,  and  you  had  been  a  fool,  or  vice 
versa,  instead  of  being  what  we  are,  a  half  decent 
sort  of  chap  and  a  wholly  delicious  sort  of  chit  — 
why,  we  might  have  come  to  grief.  Instead  of 
which  !  " 

"  But  you  did  have  a  sad  time  with  me.  It  was 
cruel." 


300  FIRST  LOVE  IS  BEST, 

"  But  I  never  let  go,  you  see.  You  held  out, 
but  I  held  on." 

"  I  am  so  glad  you  did.  Fancy  what  it  would 
be  not  to  have  you  !  " 

"  Better  try  and  put  up  with  having  me." 

"  I  will  tell  you  what  I  have  decided  on  as  an 
infallible  rule  for  the  right  conduct  of  life  :  We 
must  never  both  be  cross  at  the  same  time." 

"  Excellent.     We  will  turn  and  turn  about." 

"  Yes ;  only  that  as  I  can  never  be  sure  how 
much  you  love  me,  or  whether  you  are  not  get 
ting  tired  of  me,  if  you  are  cross  I  shall  fear  it 
means  something,  and  be  unhappy.  But  I  shall 
always  know  that  I  love  you,  and  that  if  I  am 
cross  it  is  merely  superficial  and  insignificant ;  so 
I  make  Rule  Second  :  That  you  are  never  to  be 
cross  to  me  ;  but  if  I  am  to  you,  you  are  not  to 
mind  it." 

"  I  understand :  Never  be  cross  at  the  same 
time,  and  Katy  to  occupy  all  the  time.  Agreed." 

And  it  must  be  said  for  Katherine  that  she 
rarely  abused  her  privilege.  The  best  of  men 
call  into  exercise  a  good  deal  of  patience,  and 
patience  was  not  Katherine's  strong  point.  Luck 
ily  her  husband  was  large-natured,  and  if  Kathe 
rine  was  sometimes  over-earnest  with  her  Brutus, 
he  never  took  it  to  heart.  He  took  her  to  his 
heart  instead,  and  was  so  frankly  sorry  for  the 
forgetfulness  or  the  inconsiderateness  that  had 
annoyed  her,  and  so  frankly  desirous  to  make 


A    SENTIMENTAL  SKETCH.  301 

amends,  that  Kate  usually  went  into  spasms  of 
self-abasement  over  her  vile  impatience,  and 
into  grotesque  adulation  of  the  tempter  who  had 
wrought  her  fall,  and  would  work  it  again  with 
the  same  bland  and  blithe  unconsciousness. 

There  was  one  thing  that  always  moved  Kath- 
erine  to  violent,  and  far  be  it  from  me  to  say  un 
righteous,  wrath,  and  that  was  the  philosophical 
assumption  that  conjugal  love  must  by  its  own 
weight  subside  into  "  tender  friendship."  " '  Ten 
der  friendship ! '  O,  yes ;  I  know  what  that  means. 
It  is  love  gone  to  seed  !  "  would  Kate  cry  sarcas 
tically,  her  bucolic  antecedents  ever  reappearing 
in  metaphor  and  simile.  "  Richard  Glynn,  if  you 
love  me,  say  so  ;  if  you  don't  —  don't !  But  as 
for  your  '  tender  friendship,'  let  it  not  be  so  much 
as  named  between  us  !  " 

And  it  never  was.  Whether  it  were  the  shoals 
and  breakers  of  their  early  voyage,  or  some  inborn 
quality  of  their  own,  their  love  never  seemed  to 
tone  down  into  that  "  practical  and  possible  "  do 
mestic  convenience  which  is  the  accredited  heir- 
at-law  of  love,  but  kept  always  something  of  its 
honey-moon,  holiday  nature.  Nay,  but  how 
fiercely  would  my  Kate  resent  such  a  state 
ment  !  Rather  as  the  happy  weeks  sped  into 
happy  months,  and  the  months  into  happy  years, 
it  seemed  to  Kate  that  with  each  fresh  year  she 
was  freshly  learning  love's  real,  regal  meaning. 
Her  husband  never  became  to  her  uninteresting. 


302  FIRST  LOVE  IS  BEST. 

Not  only  did  his  society  never  cease  to  be  agree 
able,  it  never  ceased  to  be  exhilarating.  His  in 
tellect,  trained  to  more  careful  observation  and 
more  tranquil  judgment,  stimulated  hers,  which 
in  turn  lent  color  and  glow  to  his.  And  neither 
was  separated  from  the  other  without  a  conscious 
lack,  or  met  without  a  conscious  gladness.  In 
his  love,  strong,  unfailing,  free  from  everything 
petty,  full  of  trust  and  help  and  cheer,  and  build 
ing  itself  into  nobler  proportions  as  each  succeed 
ing  year  laid  broader  and  firmer  foundations, 
Katherine  dwelt  secure,  content,  rejoicing,  nor 
refrained  ever  and  anon  from  breaking  forth  into 
exultant  thanksgiving.  All  the  little  rootlets  of 
her  daily  life  thrust  out  boldly  into  the  inexhaust 
ible  riches  of  his  unselfishness,  and  drew  thence 
sustenance  and  strength,  and  in  the  sunshine  of 
his  gentleness  every  shy  bud  was  won  to  its 
perfect  blossoming.  So  Kate  grew  in  grace 
daity. 

What  was  her  ministry  of  grace  to  him,  the 
angels  desire  to  look  into  —  and  perhaps  they  do. 
But  what  they  see  of  Divine  purpose  toward  the 
world  in  the  sweet  and  austere  mysteries  of 
feminine  service,  it  is  not  given  mortal  lips  to 
declare. 

And  yet  it  would  not  have  been  Kate  if  her 
bright  days  had  not  been  freaked  with  fantastic 
woes.  In  spite  of  her  Orthodox  church-member 
ship,  she  was  a  little  heathen  at  heart,  and  con- 


A   SENTIMENTAL  SKETCH.  303 

stantly  strove  with  peace-offerings  to  placate  the 
hostile  deities  and  avert  fancied  disasters. 

"  Meanwhile  the  best  way  to  escape  his  ire 
Is  not  to  seem  too  happy,"  — 

was  the  real  attitude  which  this  little  feminine 
and  Christian  Caliban  would  occasionally  assume 
towards  her  Setebos.  As  her  own  happiness 
brightened  out  of  the  gray  twilight  into  the  rosy 
dawn  and  the  brilliant  morning,  she  was  fain  to 
cast  about  her  for  danger  that  menaced  or  gloom 
to  gladden.  Walter's  fate  proved  for  some  time 
a  very  satisfying  source  of  uneasiness,  and  pre 
cluded  the  necessity  of  other  search..  Mr.  Glynn 
could  never  be  brought  to  take  a  serious  view  of 
the  subject,  and  treated  Walter's  woes  with  a 
cavalier  indifference,  not  to  say  gayety,  which 
Kate  could  not  pronounce  anything  but  heart 
less.  While  himself  professing  the  greatest  de 
light  in  Katherine's  society,  he  firmly  maintained 
that  Mr.  Laballe  would  never  be  very  rash  or 
very  wretched  at  being  deprived  of  it,  and  stead 
fastly  refused  to  pay  his  wife  the  compliment  of 
fearing  in  the  least  degree  that  her  early  lover 
would  ever  become  a  Blighted  Being  on  her  ac 
count.  And  the  event  proved  him  right.  Mr. 
Laballe  did  not  marry.  The  death  of  a  distant 
relative  gave  him  a  small  share  in  a  large  fortune ; 
not  enough  to  give  him  any  wide  sweep  in  life, 
but  enough  to  insure  personal  comfort  in  a  small 
way.  He  held  his  law-office,  but  was  never  slave 


304  FIRST  LOVE  IS  BEST. 

to  briefs  and  pleas,  and  was  never  called  on  to 
waste  his  time  and  talents  in  the  preparation 
and  presentation  of  difficult  cases.  This  left 
him  leisure  for  the  cultivation  of  his  mind  and 
the  acquisition  of  liberal,  un- partisan  views,  in 
which  he  was  so  successful  that  in  any  emer 
gency  he  could  always  be  relied  on  for  deplor 
ing  and  even  denouncing  the  savagery  of  Ameri 
can  manners,  the  poverty  of  American  literature, 
and  the  corruption  of  American  politics,  —  and 
so  became  a  valuable  member  of  society. 

All  of  which  did  not  hinder  Kate  from  indulcr- 

o 

ing  now  and  then  in  the  luxury  of  woe.  She 
was  happy  :  that,  with  the  best  will  in  the 
world,  she  could  not  deny ;  but  she  had  always 
the  one  grievance  to  fall  back  on,  that  she  was 
happy  at  the  expense  of  a  shattered  ideal !  One 
love  —  first,  last,  and  always,  to  live  for  and  to 
die  with  —  that  had  been  the  dream  of  her  girl 
hood,  her  inexorable  demand.  Anything  less 
was  fickleness,  shallowness,  unworthy  to  be 
named  by  the  sacred  name.  And  here  she  was, 
climbing  up  the  heights  of  one  love  on  the  ruins 
of  another  !  Pitiless  and  haughty  was  her  self- 
disdain —  till  in  an  unlucky  moment  even  this 
last  fortress  of  whimsical  discontent  was  wrested 
from  her  by  a  visitor  who  pointed  the  moral  of  a 
bit  of  neighborhood  gossip  with  the  very  senti 
ment  which  had  been  the  burden  of  Kate's  life- 
song.  Kate  could  lecture  herself  with  great 


A  SENTIMENTAL  SKETCH.  305 

volubility,  but  she  bridled  instantly  when  the 
same  lesson,  however  innocently,  was  enforced 
upon  her  from  a  foreign  source.  Mr.  Glynu 
watched  Kate's  chagrin  with  great  amusement. 
He  even  took  occasion,  rather  wickedly,  to  draw 
out  the  offending  visitor  upon  the  objectionable 
topic,  after  whom  no  sooner  was  the  door  closed 
than  Kate,  with  great  sacrifice  of  matronly  dig 
nity,  shook  her  fist  at  the  retreating  silk.  " '  First 
love  is  best,'  —  is  it  ?  "  repeating  her  guest's  de 
parting  words.  "  O,  yes,  first  love  is  best !  and 
this,"  —  turning  upon  her  husband  in  final  surren 
der,  and  endangering  his  life  through  impeded 
respiration  —  yet  he  seemed  to  like  it,  —  "this, 
tJiis,  THIS  is  first  love!" 
20 


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NEW  AND  POPULAR  NOVELS. 


SLAVES  OF  THE  RING.  By  F.  W.  ROBINSON,  author  of  "  Sec 
ond  Cousin  Sarah,"  "Little  Kate  Kirby,"  "For  Her  Sake,"  "  Poor 
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rural  life  are  pleasantly  interwoven  with  the  action  of  the  narrative."  — 
Boston  Transcript. 

A  WOMAN'S  RANSOM.  By  F.  W.  ROBINSON,  author  of  "Slaves 
of  the  Ring,"  "Little  Kate  Kirby,"  "For  ller  Sake,"  &c.  1vol. 
8vo.  Cloth,  $1.25;  Paper,  75  cts. 

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incident  and  management  of  the  story  which  cannot  be  denied ;  the  interest 
is  kept  up  with  singular  vividness,  and  without  the  extravagant  expedients 
to  which  popular  novelists  often  resort."  —  Press. 

TOO   MUCH   ALONE.    By  Mrs.  J.  H.  RIDDELL,  author  of  '/A  Life's 
Assize,"  "Phcmic  Keller,"  "George  Geith,"  "Above  Suspicion,"  &c. 
1  vol.     8vo.    Cloth,  $1.25 ;   Paper,  75  cts. 
*'.#*  "  The  story  is  deeply  interesting.    It  is  one  of  the  very  best  of  recent 

fictions." —  Worcester  Spy. 

ABOVE  SUSPICION.  By  arrangement  with  Mrs.  J.  H.  RIDDELL, 
author  of  "Too  Much  Alone,"  "A  Life's  Assize,"  &c.  1vol.  8vo. 
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A  TANGLED  SKEIN.  By  ALBANY  BE  FONBLANQUE,  JR.,  an 
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***  "This  novel  captivates  the  reader  when  he  first  opens  it,  and  holds 
him  in  strong  and  agreeable  chains  to  its  closing  page."  —  Boston 
Traveller. 

"  It  is  so  well  written  that,  having  once  taken  up  the  book,  it  will  be  im 
possible  to  lay  it  down  until  the  end."  —  Press. 

A  FAMILY  TREE.  By  ALBANY  DE  FONBLANQUE,  JR.,  author  of 
"Cut  Adrift,"  "A  Tangled  Skein."  1  vol.  8vo.  Cloth,  $1.25; 
Paper,  75  cts. 

***  "It  is  a  well-conceived  story,  and  is  presented  in  a  manner  to  in 
terest.  —  Toledo  Commercial. 


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Estes  Or*  Lauriafs  Publications.  —  Novels. 

THE  WIDOW  LEROUGE.    By  EMILE  GABORIAU,  author  of  "The 
Mystery  of  Orcival,"  "  File  No.  113,"  "  The  Clique  of  Gold,"  "  Other 
People's  Money."     1vol.   8vo.     Cloth,  §1.25;  Paper,  75  cts. 
***  "  A  novel  of  much  power." —  Journal. 

"  Gaboriau  is  an  author  whose  works  arc  appreciated  for  their  original 
ity  and  ingenuity."  —  Messenger. 

THE  MYSTERY  OF  ORCIVAL.    By  EMILE  GABORIAU,  author  of 

"File  No.  113,"  &c.     1vol.    8vo.    Cloth,  §1.25;  Paper,  75  cts. 
"Admirably  written,  each  character  finely  drawn.     It  will  be  read  with 
sorrow,  with  pleasure,  and  profit.    Head  it,  and  then  we  have  no  doubt  you 
will  add  it  to  your  collection  of  choice  novels  with  as  much  pleasure  as  we 
do."  —  Lawrence  American. 

THE  CLIQUE  OF  GOLD.    Translated  from  the  French  of  EMILE 
GABORIAU,  author  of  "  File  No.  113,"  "  Other   People's   Money," 
"  Within  an  Inch  of  His  Life,"  "  The  Widow  Lcrouge,"  "  The  Mys 
tery  of  Orcival,"  &c.     1  vol.     8vo.    Cloth,  §1.25;  Paper,  75  cts. 
*$*  "  It  is  strongly  sensational,  but  the  materials  are  mauagcd  with  so 

strong  a  dramatic  insight  that  one  has  not  time  or  inclination  to  think  of 

improbabilities.    M.  GABORIAU  is  without  a  peer  in  this  particular  style  of 

story."  —  Boston  Gazette. 
"  Gaboriau's  novels  increase  in  power  as  we  become  familiar  with  his 

style." —  Transcript. 

OTHER  PEOPLE'S  MONEY.    From  the  French  of  EMILE  GABO- 
KIAU,  author  of  "File  No.  113,"  "  The  Clique  of  Gold,"  "Within  an 
Inch  of  His  Life."    1vol.    8vo.    Cloth,  §1.25;  Paper,  75  cts. 
***  "Exciting  throughout,  the  story  appeals  to  refined  tastes,  and  should 

be  read  widely,  as  its  merit  is  sterling."  —  Traveller. 

WITHIN  AN  INCH  OF  HIS  LIFE.    From  the  French  of  EMILE 
GABORIAU,  author  of  "  The  Widow  Lerouge,"  "The  Mystery  of  Orci 
val,"  "File  No.  113."    1  vol.    8vo.    Cloth,  §1.25;  Paper,  75  cts. 
***  "  An  exciting  and  entertaining  novel,  full  of  dramatic  incident  and 

well-figured  character-pictures." —  Commercial  Advertiser. 

FILE  No.  113.  By  EMILE  GABORIAU,  author  of  "  The  Clique  of  Gold," 
"Other  People's 'Money,"  "Within  an  Inch  of  His  Life,"  "  The  Widow 
Lcrougc,"  "  The  Mystery  of  Orcival."  1vol.  8vo.  Cloth,  §1.25; 
Paper,  75  cts. 

*#*  "  As  good  as  Gaboriau's  stories  of  French  life  and  character  uniform 
ly  arc,  we  think  this  one  surpasses  all  his  former  efforts."  —  Journal. 

"  '  File  No.  113 '  has  created  a  sensation  wherever  it  has  appeared."  — 
Critic. 


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Estes  £r»  Lauriafs  Publications.  —  Novels. 

WOVE.V  OF  MANY  THREADS.  By  C.  V.  HAMILTON,  author  of 
"  Hopes  of  Sand,"  "  Crown  from  the  Spear."  1  vol.  8vo.  Cloth, 
$1.25 ;  Paper,  50  cts. 

***  "As  at  present  advised,  we  may  venture  to  say  that  this  '  first  novel  of 
the  season,'  from  the  pen  of  an  American  lady,  will  meet  with  acceptance 
from  the  readers  of  fiction.  The  style  is  free  and  glowing:,  and  the  author, 
locating  her  story  in  Italy,  finds  opportunities  to  show  familiarity  with  the 
land  of  song  and  art,  of  which  she  makes  incidental  use  to  heighten  the 
interest  of  the  tale."  —  Boston  Transcript. 

ROPES  OF  SAND.    By  C.  V.  HAMILTON,  author  of  "  Woven  of  Many 
Threads,"  "  Crown  from  the  Spear."    1  vol.  8vo.  Cloth,  $  1.25 ;  Paper, 
75  cts. 
*»*  "  A  work  woven  as  well  as  this  in  plot,  character,  general  finish,  and 

execution,  deserves  to  have  its  writer  publicly  heralded  upon  the  title-page." 

—  Times. 

CROWN  FROM  THE  SPEAR.  By  C.  V.  HAMILTON,  author  of 
"  Woven  of  Many  Threads,"  "  Ropes  of  Sand."  1  vol.  8vo.  Cloth, 
$1.25 ;  Paper,  75  cts. 

*#*"  It  is  a  story  of  French  domestic  life  and  character,  full  of  interest, 
and  written  in  attractive  style.  The  moral  of  the  stoiy  is  that  the  crown 
of  happiness  may  be  won  after  long  struggle  and  suffering."  —  Herald. 

"Coming  from  the  pen  of  the  author  of  'Woven  of  Many  Threads,' 
this  stoiy  is  sure  of  a  warm  welcome.  In  some  respects  it  is  an  improve 
ment  upon  its  predecessor,  having  a  more  compact  and  artistic  form,  and 
more  powerful  interest."  —  Phil.  Inquirer. 

KATE  BEAUMONT.  By  J.  W.  DE  FOREST,  author  of  "  Overland," 
"  Miss  Ravenel's  Conversion,"  "  Playing  the  Mischief."  1vol.  8vo. 
Illustrated.  Cloth,  $1.25 ;  Paper,  75  cts. 

*.**  "  He  has  written  a  novel  that  is  very  readable,  and  he  has  given 
proof  of  being  able  to  do  more  and  better  work.  His  painstaking,  his 
careful  observation  and  sprightliness,  are  qualities  which  will  certainly 
achieve  a  more  than  partial  success."  —  Nation. 

"  This  is  one  of  the  best  American  novels  we  have  ever  read.  It  is  writ 
ten  with  a  vigorous  pen  that  never  flags  till  the  last  word  is  written  and  the 
last  scene  closed." — People,  Concord. 


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Estes  <Sr*  Lauriafs  Publications.  —  Novels. 

VINETA.  From  the  German  of  E.  WERNER,  author  of  "  Good  Luck," 
&c.  1  vol.  8vo.  Cloth,  $1.25 ;  Paper,  75  cts. 

BROKEN  CHAINS.  Translated  by  FRANCES  A.  SHAW,  from  the 
German  of  E.  WERNER,  author  of  "  Good  Luck,"  &c.  1  vol.  Svo. 
Cloth,  §1.25 ;  Paper,  75  cts. 

*»*  "It  has  spirit  and  action,  united  with  power  and  depth  of  feeling."  — 
Transcript. 

"The  plot  is  highly  interesting,  and  is  well  developed,  while  an  art  at 
mosphere  pervades  the  work,  that  shows  both  refinement  and  aesthetic 
appreciation  on  the  part  of  the  writer.  The  style  is  strong  and  vigorous, 
and  contains  scenes  of  great  power."  —  Gazette. 

GOOD  LUCK.  By  the  author  of  "Broken  Chains."  1  vol.  Svo. 
Cloth,  $1.25;  Paper,  75  cents. 

*#*  "  An  attractive  and  fascinating  volume,  with  highly  dramatic  char 
acters,  clearly  drawn  and  well  sustained  throughout,  and  containing  many 
pages  of  absorbing  interest.  The  translation  is  graceful  and  natural,  one 
of  the  happy  kind  that  makes  us  forget  that  the  story  was  first  written  in  a 
foreign  tongue."  —  Enquirer. 

"  I  began  to  read  the  proof-sheets  last  evening,  and  was  compelled  by  the 
interest  of  the  story  to  read  into  the  small  hours."  —  L.  C.  M. 

NOT  EASILY  JEALOUS.  1vol.  Svo.  Cloth,  §1.25 ;  Paper,  75  cts. 
*^*  ««  This  '  Not  Easily  Jealous,'  has  some  bright  and  sparkling  charac 
ters  in  it.  There  is  not  much  plot  or  incident  in  it ;  but  the  interest  is  well 
sustained,  and  it  is  written  in  such  a  taking  sort  of  style  as  to  make  it  very 
fascinating.''  —  People. 

EXPIATED.    By  the  author  of  "  Six  Months  Hence,"  and  "  Behind 

the  Veil."    1  vol.    Svo.     Cloth,  $1.25 ;  Paper,  75  cts. 
*#*  "The  author  shows  power  of  invention,  felicity  in  the  management 
of  details,  and  a  keen  insight  into  the  mysteries  of  life." —  Boston  Globe. 

SIX  MONTHS  HENCE.  By  the  author  of  "  Behind  the  Veil,"  "  Ex 
piated."  Cloth,  $1.25;  Paper,  75  cts. 

*%*  "  This  remarkably  well  written  story  comes  to  us  characterized  by  a 
most  skilful  arrangement.  '  Behind  the  Veil '  gave  promise  of  considera 
ble  ability  in  the  field  of  design.  '  Six  Months  Hence '  has  fully  realized 
this  promise."  —  Philadelphia  Aye. 

"  It  is  of  absorbing  interest;  and  whoever  takes  it  up  will  not  readily  put 
it  down  till  the  last  scene  is  enacted,  and  the  curtain  falls."  —  People 
(Concord). 


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Estes  £r»  Lauriafs  Publications.  —  Novels. 

CHECKMATE.  By  J.  S.  LE  FANU,  .author  of  "A  Lost  Name," 
"  Tenants  of  Malory,"  &c.  1vol.  8vo.  Cloth,  $1.25;  Paper,  75  cts. 

*s*"Full  of  startling  surprises,  and  written  with  great  power." — N.  B. 
Mercury. 

"  A  powerfully  written  story,  with  an  excellent  plot,  well  carried  out."  — 
Farmer. 

"  A  work  of  fiction  with  a  plot  a3  deep  as  Wilkie  Collins'a  '  Woman  in 
White.'"  —  Herald. 

OPEN  SESAME.  By  FLORENCE  MARRYAT,  author  of  "  Love's  Con 
flict,"  "Prey  of  the  Gods,"  "Her  Lord  and  Master."  With  Illustra 
tions.  1  vol.  8vo.  Cloth,  $1.25 ;  Paper,  75  cents. 

***  "  The  plot  of  this  story  is  deeply  laid."  —  Register. 
"  A  story  of  much  love."  —  Herald. 

DEEP  WATERS.  By  ANNA  II.  DRURT,  author  of  "  Misrepresenta 
tion,"  &c.,  &c.  1  vol.  8vo.  Cloth,  $1.25 ;  Paper,  7">  cts. 

***  "A  novel  full  of  melancholy  and  pathos."  —  Democrat. 

"The  story  opens  in  one  of  those  old  English  homes  which  have  been 
highly  respectable  and  wealthy,  and  is  well  worth  reading." — Commercial, 
Toledo. 

WOMAN'S  LOVE ;  or,  Like  and  Unlike.  By  J.  F.  SMITH,  author  of 
"Lady  Ashleigh,"  "Marion  Burnard,"  &c.  1  vol.  8vo.  Cloth, 
$1.25 ;  Paper,  75  cts. 

%*  "  This  novel  will  satisfy  the  most  exacting  readers  of  the  old  style  of 
romance." — Albany  Journal. 

STRETTON.  By  HENRY  KINGSLET,  author  of  "  Ravenshoe,"  "Geof 
frey  Hamlyn,""  "  Hetty,"  &c.,  die.  With  Illustrations.  1  vol.  8vo. 
Cloth,  $1.25 ;  Paper,  75  cts. 

***"  A  charming,  bright,  and  sparkling  novel  for  the  tourist."  —  Bangor 
Whig. 

"  Henry  Kingsley  has  done  more  to  cultivate  a  correct  taste  among 
readers  of  modern  novels,  than  any  other  author  of  the  day."—  Times,  Kew 
Orleans. 

JETTATRICE.  From  the  French  of  Madame  AUGUSTUS  CRAVEN, 
author  of  "  Fleurange,"  "  A  Sister's  Story,"  &c.  1  vol.  8vo.  Cloth, 
$1.25;  Paper,  75  cts. 

*$*  "  A  tale  of  rare  purity  and  nobility."  —  Press. 

"  The  scene  is  laid  at  Messina,  and  runs  through  Naples  and  Italy."  — 
Courier. 


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Estes  &•»  Lauriafs  Publications.  —  Novels. 

JOCELYN'S  MISTAKE.  By  Mrs.  J.  K.  SPENDER,  author  of  "  Her 
Own  Fault,"  "Brothers  in  Law,"  &c.  1vol.  8vo.  Cloth,  $1.25; 
Paper,  75  cts. 

*#*  "Mrs.  Spender's  English  is  unusually  good,  and  she  has  learned  the 
art  of  working  her  opinions  of  men  and  things  into  the  web  of  her  story, 
instead  of  merely  intercalating  homilies.  .  .  .  The  Jocelyn  of  the  book  is 
very  skilfully  drawn.  ...  It  rises  in  type  and  diction  far  above  the  ephem 
eral  stories  of  the  season."  —  Academy. 

THE  LOST  DESPATCH.  Translated  from  the  German  of  FRIED- 
HICH  FUIEURICII,  by  L.  A.WILLIAMS.  1  vol.  8vo.  Cloth,  $1.25; 
Paper,  50  cts. 

*#*  "  Lovers  of  pen-pictures  and  florid  writing  will  not  find  any  of  their 
favorite  style.  There  is  no  padding,  no  burning  sensation,  no  bigamy,  nor 
divorce.  But  there  is  a  well  constructed  story,  well-told,  and  also  some 
finely-drawn  characters.  The  interest,  too,  is  well  sustained.  '  The  Lost 
Despatch '  will  serve  to  pass  a  couple  of  hours  pleasantly  enough ;  and  what 
is  more  to  the  purpose,  in  these  days  of  lilthy  novels,  it  may  be  read  by  all 
without  fear  or  hesitation."  —  N.  T.  Globe. 

CHOISY.  By  JAMES  P.  STORY.  1  vol.  8vo.  Cloth,  $1.25;  Paper, 
75  cts. 

*#*  "  We  recommend  the  book  for  a  pleasant  companion  on  listless 
August  days.  While  shedding  a  tear  of  sympathy  over  the  fate  of  Nina 
Choisy,  its  salutary  lesson  cannot  fail  to  produce  lasting  results."  — 
Transcript. 

"  It  is  full  of  interesting  and  thrilling  incidents  from  beginning  to  end." 
—  Press. 

NOBODY'S  FORTUNE.  Jljr  EDMUND  YATES,  author  of  "Black 
Sheep,"  "The  Yellow  Flag."  vol.  8vo.  Cloth,  $1.25;  Paper, 
75  cts. 

%*  "  The  fact  that  Dickens  was  connected,  even  thus  indirectly,  with  the 
work,  will  give  it  additional  value  in  the  estimation  of  most  readers."  — 
Cleveland  Herald. 

"The  best  of  his  productions."  —  Boston  Post. 

THE  YELLOW  FLAG.  By  EDMUND  YATES,  author  of  "Nobody's 
Fortune,"  "Black  Sheep."  1vol.  8vo.  Cloth,  $1.25;  Paper,  75  cts. 

*¥*  "The  story  is  dramatic  from  opening  to  close,  keeping  the  reader 
constantly  attent,  and  each  moment  giving  a  gratification."  —  New  Bedford 
Mercury. 


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eent,  postpaid,  to  any  part  of  the  \Vorld,  on  receipt 
ot  Price,  by  KSTKS  &  L^URJAT,  3O1  Washing 
ton  Street,  Uoston. 


Estes  &•*  Lauriafs  Publications.  —  Novels. 

ELENA:  AN  ITALIAN  TALE.  By  L.  N.  COMTN,  author  of 
'•Athcrstonc  Priory,"  "Ellicc,"  &c.  1  vol.  Cloth,  §1.23;  Taper, 
75  cts. 

*#*  "  '  Elena,'  in  character  and  plot,  is  excellent." —  Traveller  (Boston). 

"An  Italian  story  of  great  power  and  beauty;  sure  to  live." — Leeds 
Mercury.  , 

"The  most  elegant  and  interesting  fiction  of  the  season."  —  London 
Messenyer. 

"  A  very  pleasing  and  touching  story.  It  is  sure  to  be  read."  —  London 
Daily  News. 

ATHERSTONE  PRIORY.    By  L.  N.  COMTN,  author  of  "Elena," 

"  Ellicc,"  &c.     1  vol.    Cloth,  $1.25;  Paper,  75  cts. 

***  "A  quiet,  charming,  English  romance  of  real  life.  The  scenes  are 
life-like,  and  the  story  interesting.  The  heroine  at  once  wins  the  sympa 
thy  of  the  reader,  which  deepens  into  admiration,  and  an  intense  interest 
in  her  fortunes  and  misfortunes."  —  Examiner. 

ETHEL  MILDMAY'S  FOLLIES.  By  the  author  of  "Petites  Ro 
mance."  1vol.  8vo.  Cloth,  $1.25;  Paper,  75  cts. 

***  "A  story  which  we  do  not  hesitate  to  recommend."  —  Spectator. 

"  A  taste  would  be  difficult  to  please  which  could  not  find  amusement  in 
following  the  fortunes  of  the  actors  developed  in  this  story."  —  Transcript. 

MAUD  OR  NINA— Like  Cures  Like.    By  G.  J.  WHYTE-MELVILLE, 

author  of  "  Katcrfelto,"  "Digby  Grand,"  &c.,  &c.    1vol.    8vo.    Cloth, 

$1.25;  Paper,  75  cts. 

***  "  Sprightly  and  sensational." —  Vox  Populi. 
"  The  most  fastidious  may  read  Maud  and  Nina."  —  Journal. 

ZELD  A'S  FORTUNE.  By  R.  E.  FRANCILLON,  author  of  "Earl  Dean," 
"  Pearl  and  Emerald."  1vol.  8vo.  Illustrated.  Cloth,  $1.25;  Paper, 
75  cts. 

***  "  This  book  shows  as  much  power  as  Bulwer's  early  novels  did."  — 
Springfield  Republican. 

"  Charles  G.  Lcland  and  Louise  Chandler  Moulton  speak  of  it  in  very 
flattering  terms."  —  Public. 

THE  WICKED  WOODS   OF  TOBEREEVIL.    By  Miss  MtrL- 
IIOLLAXD,  author  of  "Hester  History."     1  vol.    8vo.    "Cloth,  $'1.25; 
Paper,  75  cts. 
*#*  "  A  talc  of  Irish  life,  legend  and  humor,  sketched  with  vivacity,  and 

replete  with  racy  incident,  stirring  adventures,  and  well-depicted  feeling." 

—  Inter-  Ocean. 


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of  r»rice,  by  ESTES  «Sc  Jj-A-URIA/r,  3O1  Washing 
ton.  .Slroet,  Boston. 


Estes  &•»  Lanriafs  Publications.  —  Novels. 

THE  FOE  IN  THE  HOUSEHOLD.  By  CAROLINE  CHJESEBUO*. 
1  vol.  8vo.  Cloth,  $1.25 ;  Paper,  75  cts. 

*»*  "  It  is  purely  domestic  in  its  character,  instructive  in  its  moral  teach 
ings,  and  possesses  a  subtle  interest  more  absorbing  than  that  which  at 
taches  to  the  conventional  style  of  modern  romances."  —  Press. 

CAN  THE  OLD  LOVE.  By  ZADEL  BARNES  BUDDINGTON.  1  vol. 
8vo.  Illustrated.  Cloth,  $1.25;  Paper,  75  cts. 

*»*  "  The  most  unique  and  original  portion  exhibits  a  married  man  of 
sixty-three  years  of  age,  who  falls  in  love  with  the  child  of  his  friend,  on 
her  return  from  boarding-school."  —  Philadelphia  Age. 

RUTH  MAXWELL.  By  Lady  BLAKE,  author  of  "Claude,"  "Lady 
of  Lyndon."  1vol.  Svb.  Cloth,  $1.25;  Paper,  75  cts. 

*»*  "  This  stoiy  is  told  with  a  quiet  charm,  and  contains  thoroughly  good 
and  pleasant  reading."' — Morning  Post. 

"It  is  a  gracefully  written  story,  full  of  interest,  and  distinguished  by 
some  capital  character  drawings.  The  tone  is  healthy,  and  the  style  bright 
and  spirited.  The  heroine  is  a  charming  conception,  and  is  developed 
with  rare  skill  and  effect.  We  can  conscientiously  recommend  the  book 
as  one  thoroughly  pure  in  its  morality,  and  peculiarly  adapted  to  summei 
reading." —  Globe. 

LADY  OF  LYNDON.  By  Lady  BLAKE,  author  of  "  Claude,"  "  Euth 
Maxwell."  1vol.  Svo.  Cloth,  $1.25;  Paper,  75  cts. 

*#*  "There  is  nothing  sensational  in  its  plot;  the  moral  it  inculcates  is 
pure,  healthy,  and  instructive,  while  its  literary  qualifications  cannot  be 
gainsaid."  —  New  York  Albion. 

A  ROSE  IN  JUNE.  By  Mrs.  OLIPHANT,  author  of  "  Story  of  Valen 
tine  and  his  Brother,"  "Squire  Ardcn,"  "For  Love  and  Life,"  "In 
nocent."  1vol.  Svo.  Illustrated.  Cloth,  $1.25;  Paper,  50  cts. 

*.$*  "In  'A  Eose  in  June '  Mrs.  Oliphant  is  at  her  very  best  again.  The 
book  is  full  of  character,  drawn  with  the  most  delicate  of  touches."  — 
Aihcnwum. 

"  A  pleasant  novel,  agreeably  told.  Mrs.  Oliphant  is  accomplished  in 
her  art;  her  knowledge  of  the  instrument  with  which  she  has  to  deal,  and 
of  the  audience  for  whom  she  plays  upon  it,  was  never  more  thoroughly 
exhibited  than  in  her  latest  work,  'A  Hose  in  June.'  " —  Observer. 

"  One  of  the  sweetest,  most  charming,  and  most  natural  stories  which 
that  popular  writer  has  given  us."  —  Boston  Journal. 


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Estes  fir*  Lauriafs  Publications.  —  Novels. 

MISS  ROVEL.    From  the  French  of  VICTOR  CHERBULIEZ,  author  of 
the  "Romance  of  an  Honest  Woman,"  &c.    Translated  by  FRANCES 
A.  SHAW.     1vol.    Svo.     Cloth,  $1.25;  Paper,  50  cts. 
*V*  "  This  translation  of  one  of  the  popular  French  novels  is  a  thorough 
love  story;  it  is  alive  with  incident,  and  the  interest  is  kept  up  with  singu 
lar  vividness,  and  without  the  extravagant  expedients  to  which  popular 
novelists  often  resort."  —  Gazette. 

"The  story  is  vciy  strong  in  plot,  and  the  translation  is  excellent."  — 
Commercial. 

BUFFETS.  By  CHARLES  H.  DOE.  1  yol.  8ro.  Cloth,  f  1.25 ;  Paper, 
75  cts. 

*#*  "  It  is  very  spicy  and  thoroughly  modern."  —  Chicago  Journal. 

"There  is  a  great  deal  of  pleasant  humor  in  this  novcL"  —  Albany 
Journal. 

"  This  novel  shows  much  skill  and  some  delicacy  of  touch,  in  which  our 
novelists  generally  are  most  wanting." — Sprinyfield  Republican. 

IN  A.  By  KATHERINE  VALERIC.  1  vol.  Svo.  Cloth,  $1.25;  Paper, 
75  cts. 

*.£*  "  In  the  construction  of  the  story,  we  Und  proof  of  considerable  inven 
tive  power,  a  lively  and  brilliant  imagination,  and  a  certain  fluency  of 
expression."  —  N.  Y.  Tribune. 

"  There  is  a  freshness  in  this  that  is  attractive."  —  Messenger. 

"  A  charming  Italian  love-story,  as  mellow,  genial,  and  pure  as  an 
Italian  sun." 

"A  cleverly  written  stoiy  of  Italian  life,  pure  in  tone." —  Transcript. 

ONLY  THREE  WEEKS.     1  vol.    Svo.    Cloth,  $1.25;  Paper,  50  cts. 

*V*  "  Just  the  kind  of  a  story  for  reading  leisurely  on  a  summer  day." 
—  Advertiser. 

"  The  book  is  a  ;good  one,  full  of  powerful  situations,  excellent  delinea 
tions  of  character,  and  capital  writing." —  Gazette. 

"A  sparkling,  racy  novel."  —  People  (Concord). 

"  Charming  little  story."  —  N.  Y.  Tribune. 

A  COMEDY  OF  TERRORS.  By  JAMES  DE  MILLE,  author  of 
"American  Ban-on, "  "Cryptogram,"  "Dodge  Club."  1  vol.  Svo. 
Cloth,  $1.25;  Paper,  75  cts. 

***  "  Every  chapter  is  full  of  mirth.  DE  MILLE  is  a  rare  genius  with 
the  pen."  —  Press  (Providence). 

"  It  is  in  many  respects  the  most  ingenious  of  this  fertile  novelist's 
books."  —  Boston  Journal. 


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Estes  &  Lauriafs  Publications.  —  History. 


EPOCHS  OF  ENGLISH  HISTORY. 

A   SERIES  OF   BOOKS   NARRATING  THE 

HISTORY  OF  ENGLAND  AT  SUCCESSIVE  EPOCHS. 

EDITED    BY 

The  Rev.   M.   CREIGHTON,   M.   A., 

Late  Fellow  and  Tutor  of  Merton  College,  Oxford. 

The  object  of  tins  Series  is  to  supply  an  Elementary  History  of  England, 
•which  shall  be  sound  and  trustworthy  as  well  as  inexpensive.  English 
History  conveniently  divides  itself  into  eight  Periods.  By  the  adoption  of 
this  division  a  more  intelligible  and  more  interesting  view  of  the  course  of 
English  History  may  be  obtained,  while  the  advantage  of  cheapness  will  be 
secured  by  the  separate  sale  of  the  several  divisions. 

Early  England  up  to  the  Norman  Conquest.  By  FREDERICK 
YORK-POWELL,  M.  A.,  Law  Lecturer  Ch.  Ch.  Oxford;  Historical 
Lecturer  Trin.  Coll.  Oxford.  With  4  Maps.  1  vol.  IGmo.  50  cts. 

England  a  Continental  Power,  from  the  Conquest  to  Magna  Charta, 
10GG-121G.  By  LOUISE  CREIGHTOX.  With  a  Colored  Map  of  the  Do 
minions  of  the  Angevin  Kings.  1  vol.  ICmo.  Cloth.  50  cts. 

The  Rise  of  the  People,  and  Growth  of  Parliament,  from  the 
Great  Charter  to  the  Accession  of  Henry  VII.  (1215-1485. 

By  JAMES  ROWLEY,  M.  A.  Professor  of  Modern  History  and  Litera 
ture,  University  College,  Bristol.  With  4  Maps.  1  vol.  IGmo. 
Cloth.  50  cts. 

The  Tudors  and  the  Reformation,  (1485-1603.)  By  the  Rev. 
MANDELL  CREIGHTOX,  M.  A.,  Late  Fellow  and  Tutor  of  Merton  Col 
lege,  Oxford;  Editor  of  the  Series.  With  3  Maps.  1  vol.  IGmo. 
Cloth.  50  cts. 

The  Struggle  against  Absolute  Monarchy,  from  1003  to  1088. 
By  B.  MERITON  CORDERY,  author  of  "  King  and  Commonwealth." 
With  2  Maps.  1  vol.  IGmo.  Cloth.  50  cts. 

The  Settlement  of  the  Constitution,  from  1088  to  1778.  By 
JAMES  ROWLEY,  M.  A.,  Professor  of  Modern  History  and  Literature, 
University  College,  Bristol.  1  vol.  IGmo.  Cloth.  50  cts. 

England  during  the  American  and  European  Wars,  from 
1778  to  1820.  By  O.  W.  TANCOCK,  M.  A.,  Assistant-Master,  King's 
School,  Sherborne,  Dorset.  1  vol.  IGmo.  Cloth.  50  cts. 

Modern  England  from  1820  to  1875.  By  T.  ARNOLD,  M.  A., 
author  of  "  A  History  of  English  Literature,"  &c.  1  vol.  IGmo. 
Cloth.  50  cts. 


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Estes  6°  Lauriafs  Publications.  —  History. 


EPOCHS   OF  ANCIENT  HISTORY. 


A  scries  of  books  narrating  the  History  of  Greece  and  Rome,  and  of 
their  relations  to  other  countries,  at  successive  Epochs.  Edited  by  the 
Rev.  G.  \V.  Cox,  M.  A.,  author  of  the  "  Aryan  Mythology,"  and  jointly 
by  CIIAPLES  SANKEY,  M.  A.,  late  Scholar  of  Queen's  College,  Oxford ; 
Assistant  Master,  Marlborough  College.  Uniform  with  "  Epochs  of  Mod 
ern  History." 

The  Greeks  and  the  Persians.    By  the  Rev.  GEO.  W.  Cox,  M.  A., 

late  Scholar  of  Trinity  College,  Oxford,  Joint  Editor  of  the  Series. 
With  4  colored  Maps.    1  vol.    16mo.    Cloth.    $1.00. 

The  Early  Empire.  By  the  Rev.  \V.  WOLFE  CAPES,  M.  A.,  Reader 
of  Ancient  History  in  the'  University  of  Oxford.  With  2  colored  Maps. 
1vol.  IGmo.  Cloth.  $1.00. 

Early  Rome,  from  the  Foundation  of  the  City  to  its  Destruc 
tion  by  the  Gauls.  By  WILHELM  IIINE,  author  of  "Ilistoiy  of 
Rome."  With  1  colored  Map.  1vol.  IGmo.  Cloth.  $1.00. 

The  Athenian  Empire,  from  the  Flight  of  Xerxes  to  the  Fall 
of  Athens.  By  the  Rev.  G.  W.  Cox,  M.  A.,  late  Scholar  of  Trinity 
College,  Oxford,  Joint  Editor  of  the  Scries.  With  5  colored  Maps. 
1vol.  16mo.  Cloth.  $1.00. 

The  Roman  Triumvirates.  By  the  Very  Rev.  CHARLES  MERRI- 
VALE,  D.D.,  Dean  of  Ely.  With  1  colored  Map.  1vol.  IGmo.  Cloth. 
$1.00. 

The  Age  of  the  Antonines ;  or,  the  Roman  Empire  of  the 
2d  Century.  By  the  Rev.  WOLFE  CAPES,  M.  A.,  Reader  of  An 
cient  Ilistorv  in  the  University  of  Oxford.  With  2  colored  Maps. 
1  vol.  IGmo.  Cloth. 


Macedonian  Empire,  its  Rise  and  Culmination  to  the  Death 
of  Alexander  the  Great.  By  A.  M.  CURTEIS,  M.  A.,  Assistant 
Master,  Shcrbornc  School.  With  8  colored  Maps.  1  vol.  IGmo. 
Cloth.  $1.00. 

The  Gracchi,  Marius,  and  Sulla.  By  A.  H.  BEESLY,  M,  A.,  As 
sistant  Master,  Marlborough  College.  1  vol.  IGmo.  Cloth.  $1.00. 

Rome  and  Carthage,  the  Punic  Wars.  ByR.  BOSWORTH  SMITH, 
M.  A.,  Assistant  Master,  Harrow  School.  1  vol.  IGmo.  Cloth.  $1.00. 

Spartan  and  Theban  Supremacy.  By  CHARLES  SANKET,  M.  A., 
late  Scholar  of  Queen's  College,  Oxford;  Assistant  Master,  Marl- 
borough  College;  Joint  Editor  of  the  Series.  1  vol.  IGmo.  Cloth. 
$1.00. 


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Estcs  £r*  Laitriafs  Publications.  —  Scientific. 

NATURAL  HISTORY  AND  SCIENCE. 


HALF-HOURS  WITH  INSECTS.  A  Popular  Account  of  their 
Habits.  Modes  of  Life,  &c. ;  which  are  beneficial,  and  which  are  inju 
rious  to  vegetation.  By  A.  S.  PACKARD,  JR.,  of  tlie  Peabody  Academy 
of  Science.  The  subjects  treated  of  are:  Insects  of  the  Garden; 
Isolations  of  Insects  to  Man;  Insects  of  the  Plant-House;  Edible 
Insects ;  Insects  of  the  Pond  and  Stream ;  the  Population  of  an  Apple- 
Tree  ;  Insects  of  the  Field  ;  Insects  of  the  Forest ;  Insects  as  Mimics  ; 
Insects  as  Architects;  Social  Life  of  Insects  and  Mental  Powers  of 
Insects.  The  volume  contains  colored  plate,  260  wood-cut  illustra 
tions  and  392  pages,  bound  In  one  volume.  Crown  SYo.,  cloth.  §2.00. 

OUR  COMMON  INSECTS.  A  Popular  Account  of  the  more  com 
mon  Insects  of  our  Country,  embracing  Chapters  on  Bees  and  their 
Parasites,  Moths,  Flics,  Mosqiiitos,  Beetles,  &c. ;  while  a  Calendar 
will  give  a  general  account  of  the  more  common  Injurious  and  Bene 
ficial  Insects,  and  their  Time  of  Appearance,  Habits,  &c.  200  pp. 
Profusely  Illustrated.  1  vol.,  12mo.,  cloth.  Price  $2.00. 

SAY'S  ENTOMOLOGY.  A  Description  of  the  Insects  of  North 
America.  By  TIIOMAS  SAY.  With  54  Hill-page  steel-plate  Illustra 
tions,  engraved  and  colored  from  nature.  Edited  by  J.  L.  LECOXTE. 
With  a  Memoir  by  GEORGE  ORB.  2  vols.,  Svo.,  cloth,  §15.00 ;  half- 
calf,  §20.00. 

*j(f*Tlii3  standard  work  is  now  out  of  print,  the  plates  having  been  de 
stroyed.  We  oiler  the  balance  of  the  edition  at  the  above  prices.  It  will 
soon  become  scarce,  and  command  a  very  much  higher  price. 

FIELD  ORNITHOLOGY.  A  Manual  of  Instruction  on  Collecting, 
Preparing,  and  Preserving  Birds.  By  ELLIOTT  COUES.  With  which 
is  issued  a  Check-List  of  North  American  Birds.  1  vol.  Svo.,  cloth. 
$2.50. 

KEY  TO  NORTH  AMERICAN  BIRDS.  By  ELLIOTT  COTTES, 
M.  D.  361)  imperial  octavo  pages.  Illustrated  by  G  Steel  Plates,  ami 
238  Wood-Cuts.  A  Manual  or  Text-Book  of  the  Birds  of  North 
America;  containing  a  Synopsis  of  Living  and  Fossil  Birds,  and 
Descriptions  of  every  North  American  Species  known  to  this  Time. 
1  vol.,  royal  Svo.,  cloth.  Price,  §7.00. 

PACKARD'S  GUIDE  TO  THE  STUDY  OF  INSECTS.  Bemg 
a  Popular  Introduction  to  the  Study  of  Entomology,  and  a  Treatise  on 
Injurious  and  Bcnciicial  Insects;  with  Descriptions  and  Accounts,  of 
the  Habits  of  Insects,  their  Transformations,  Development,  and  Classi 
fication.  15  full-page  Plates,  and  670  Cuts  in  the  Text,  embracing  12(50 
Figures  of  American  Insects.  Sixth  edition.  1  vol.,  bvo.  Price  re 
duced  to  §5.00. 
***  This  book  is  now  acknowledged  to  be  the  standard >  and  is  used  in 

the  leading  universities  and  institutions  of  Europe  and  America. 


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ton  Street,  Uowtoru 


Estcs  &*  Lauriafs  Publications.  —  Scientific. 

Natural   History  and   Science  continued. 

LAND  AND  GAME.  The  Land  and  Game  Birds  of  New  England. 
With  Descriptions  of  the  Birds,  their  Nests  and  Eggs,  their  Ilahits  and 
Notes.  An  entirely  new  and  accurate  work,  which  no  sportsman  or 
collector  can  afford  to  be  without.  1  vol.  8vo.  Cloth,  $;>.00. 

TYLOR  (E.  B.).  PRIMITIVE  CULTURE.  Researches  into  the 
Development  of  Mythology,  Philosophy,  Religion,  Art,  and  Custom. 
2  vols.,  8vo  cloth,  §3.00. 

***"  Scanty  justice  can  be  done  to  Mr.  Tylor's  admirable  discussion  of 
animism.  It  is  in  the  skill  and  sagacity  with  which  such  illustrations  are 
introduced  that  one  principal  charm  of  Mr.  Tylor's  book  consists.  The 
author  asks  us  to  admit  nothing  on  «  priori  evidence,  for  which  irrefrag 
able  inductive  proof  cannot  also  be  cited,  and  at  every  step  he  halts  to 
take  his  bearings,  minutely  scrutinizing  the  whole  visible  field.  Ill  track 
ing  the  wilderness  of  primeval  speculation,  he  is  a  guide  no  less  safe  than 
delightful."  —  JOHN  FISKB,  in  the  North  American  Review. 

LIFE  HISTORIES  OF  ANIMALS,   INCLUDING  MAN;   or, 

Outlines  of  Comparative  Embryology.    With  numerous  Illustrations. 
1  vol.    8vo.    Cloth,  $2.50. 
***  "  An  ample  work  of  reference  for  advanced  students."  —  Tribune. 

THE  UNITY  OF  NATURAL  PHENOMENA.  An  Introduction 
to  the  Study  of  the  Forces  of  Nature.  Being  a  popular  Explanation 
of  the  Latest  Discoveries  in  the  Domain  of  Natural  Science,  including 
the  Correlation  of  Forces,  Mode  of  Motion,  Force  of  Gravity,  and 
Mutual  Convertibility  of  the  Forces  of  Nature.  From  the  French  of 
EMILE  SA.IGEY.  \Vith  Notes  and  an  Introduction  by  Prof.  T.  MOSES, 
of  Urbaua  University.  1  vol.  Crown  JSvo.  $1.50. 

A  HAND-BOOK  OF  HARDY  TREES,  SHRUBS,  and  Herba 
ceous  Plants.  Containing  Descriptions,  Native  Countries,  &c.,  of  the 
best  species  in  cultivation;  together  with  cultural  details,  comparative 
hardiness,  suitability  for  particular  positions,  &c.,  based  on  the  French 
work  of  DECAISNH  and  NAUDIN,  of  the  Institute  of  France.  By  W. 
B.  HEMSLET;  with  an  Introduction  by  EDWAED  fc>.  HAND,  JR.  300 
fine  Illustrations.  1  vol.  8vo.  700pp.  "$7.50. 

TYLOR  (E.  B.).    THE  EARLY  HISTORY  OF  MANKIND, 

and  Development  of  Civilization.  By  EDWARD  B.  TYL.OR,  author  of 
"  Primitive  Culture,"  "  Mexico  and  the  Mexicans,"  &c.  1  vol,  Svo. 
$2.50. 

WHAT  YOUNG  PEOPLE   SHOULD  KNOW.    Being  the  Anat 
omy,  Physiology,  and  Hygiene  of  the  Human  Reproductive  Organs. 
By 'Pro  I'. 'DUET  G.  WILDER,  of  Cornell  University.     12mo.    $1.50. 
***  A  careful  and  straightforward  essay  upon  this  important  subject,  by 
(his  distinguished  naturalist,  and  one  which  is  sure  to  attract  great  atten 
tion. 


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Estes  6r»  Lauriafs  Publications.  —  Scientific. 

HALF-HOUR    RECREATIONS 

In    JPopular    Science.     "Vol.  I. 

Edited    by    DANA    ESTES. 
1  vol.,  Crown  Svo.,  Cloth,  with  Index,  $2.50. 


%*  The  growing  demand,  in  this  country,  for  books  on  popular  scienoe, 
encouraged  the  editor  and  publishers  to  issue  this  series  of  papers,  com 
piled  from  the  works  of  the  most  popular  scientific  writers. 

1.  Strange  Discoveries  respecting  the  Aurora  and  recent  Solar 

Researches.    By  RICIIARD  A.  PROCTOR,  F.  R.  A.  S. 

2.  Cranial  Affinities  of  Man  and  the  Ape.    By  Prof.  RUDOLPH 

VIRCHOW,  of  Berlin,  author  of  "  Cellular  Pathology."  Fully  illus 
trated. 

3.  Spectrum  Analysis  Explained,  and  its  Uses  to  Science  Illustrated. 

With  a  Colored  Plate  and  several  Woodcuts. 

4.  Spectrum  Analysis  Discoveries,  showing  its  application  in  Mi 

croscopical  Research,  and  to  Discoveries  of  the  Physical  Constitution 
and  Movements  of  the  Heavenly  Bodies.  From  the  works  of  Schelleu, 
Young,  Roscoe,  Lockyer,  Huggins,  and  others. 

5.  Nebulae,  Meteoric  Showers  and  Comets. 

G.  Unconscious  Action  of  the  Brain,  and  Epidemic  Delusions, 

By  Dr.  CARPENTER,  author  of  the  "Microscope  and  its  Revelations," 
"  Human  Physiology,"  &c. 

7.  Geology  of  the  Stars.    By  Prof.  A.  WINCHELL,  of  the  University  of 

Michigan,  author  of  "  Sketches  of  Creation." 

8.  On  Yeast.    By  Prof.  HUXLEY,  F.  R.  S. 

9.  The  Stone  Age,  Past  and  Present.   By  EDWARD  B.  TTLOR,  author 

of  "  Primitive  Culture." 

10.  Origin  of  Metalliferous  Deposits.    By  Prof.  T.  STERRY  HUNT. 

11.  Coal  as  a  Reservoir  of  Power,  by  ROBERT  HUNT;  and  Atoms. 
by  Prof.  CLIFFORD. 

12.  The  Circulation  of  the  Waters  on  the  Face  of  the  Earth.    By 

Prof.  H.  W.  DOVE. 

The  above  12  Nos.  sold  separately.    Price  25  cents  each. 


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ton  Street,  Boston. 


Estcs  (Sr»  Lauriafs  Publications. —  Scientific. 

HALF-HOUR    RECREATIONS 

In    IPopnlar    Science.     "V^ol.   II. 

Twelve   Parts.       25  Cts.  eacli.      Twelve   Consecutive    Numbers, 

making  a   Complete  Volume,  will  be  sent,  postpaid, 

as  issued,  oil  receipt  of  $2.50. 

We  annex  a  list  of  some  of  the  papers  which  appear  in  Vol.  II.  of  the  scries : 

The  Transmission  oi  Sound  by  the  Atmosphere.    By  JOHN  TVN- 

DALL,  F.  11.  S. Gigantic  Ciittle-Fish.    By  W.  SAVILLE  KENT, 

F.  L.  S.,  of  the  Natural  History  Department  of  the  British  Museum. 

The  Glacial  Epoch  of  our  Globe.    By  ALEX.  BRAUN. 

The  Sun  and  the  Earth.    By  Prof.  BALFOUK  STEWART,  F.  R.  S. • 

Force  Electrically  Fxhibited.    By  J.  W.  Phelps. 

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